In 'The Paradox of Choice,' Barry Schwartz argues that the abundance of choices in modern Western society, while seemingly beneficial, can actually be detrimental to our psychological and emotional well-being. He explains how the explosion in choices, from mundane decisions like buying jeans to profound challenges like balancing career and family, has paradoxically become a problem rather than a solution. Schwartz synthesizes current research in social sciences to make the counterintuitive case that eliminating choices can reduce stress, anxiety, and busyness. He offers practical steps to limit choices, focus on important ones, and derive greater satisfaction from decision-making. The book also introduces the concepts of 'maximizers' and 'satisficers,' highlighting the differences in their decision-making processes and outcomes.
In 'Give and Take', Adam Grant examines the surprising forces that shape success, highlighting the differences between givers, matchers, and takers. Givers contribute to others without expecting anything in return, matchers aim to trade evenly, and takers strive to get as much as possible from others. Grant uses cutting-edge evidence and captivating stories to show how these styles impact success across various industries. The book emphasizes the benefits and challenges of adopting a giver mentality and provides practical advice on how to build successful relationships and achieve extraordinary results.
In 'Barking Up the Wrong Tree,' Eric Barker challenges common misconceptions about success by presenting both sides of various arguments. The book is divided into six chapters, each exploring dichotomous views on success, such as whether playing it safe or taking risks is more beneficial, whether nice guys finish first or last, and whether quitters never win or winners never quit. Barker draws on a wide range of examples, including stories from Navy SEALs, top comedians, and historical figures, to illustrate his points. He emphasizes the importance of factors like creativity, passion, obsession, and perseverance in achieving real-world success, rather than just following rules and achieving good grades.
In this book, Angela Duckworth presents a compelling argument that success is driven more by grit, a fusion of relentless passion and perseverance, than by talent. She explains what grit is, how to identify and develop it, and how it can be grown through stages such as developing interests, consistent practice, finding a pro-social purpose, and cultivating optimism. The book is structured in three parts: explaining what grit is and why it matters, how to grow grit from the inside out, and how to grow grit from the outside in, targeting parents, coaches, teachers, and organizational leaders. Duckworth supports her arguments with personal stories, historical insights, and interviews with high achievers from various fields.
In 'Excellent Sheep,' William Deresiewicz critiques the high-pressure environment of elite colleges, where students are often driven to achieve without developing critical thinking or a sense of purpose. He argues that college should be a time for self-discovery and establishing personal values, rather than merely preparing students for professional success.
My guest today is Eric Barker, author of "Barking Up the Wrong Tree."
We all know those collective maxims on success: nice guys finish last; it’s not what you know, it’s who you know; winners never quit.
We’ve heard them so often that we accept them as articles of faith.
But are they really true?
My guest today says, yes…and no.
His name is Eric Barker and he’s the author of one of the few blogs I regularly read: Barking Up the Wrong Tree. There, he takes a look at what actual research says about these tried-and-true maxims of success and provides a nuanced, often counterintuitive look at them. He’s recently taken some of his best writing from 8 years at the blog, expanded on it, and turned it into a book by the same name.
Today on the show, Eric and I discuss why most of the ideas we have about success are wrong and what we can do to be better advice sleuths. Eric shares research that shows why high school valedictorians are less likely to become millionaires or influential leaders, and what that teaches us on the importance of knowing ourselves. He then breaks down the idea that nice guys always finish last, and how it’s both true and false at the same time. We then discuss why grit can sometimes be overrated and why winners in fact always quit. We end our conversation discussing why being a glad-handing extrovert can both garner success and sew the seeds of failure, and how the idea of work/life balance is making people more miserable than ever, as well as what you can do about it.
Lots of fascinating tidbits in this show that you can implement right away to improve your life. Plenty of great cocktail party fodder as well.
The Art of Manliness 
