Three Percent

In this episode, we welcome therapist, writer, and podcast host Blake Blankenbecler into a powerful conversation about emotional language, body awareness, and the harm of emotional outsourcing. Blake unpacks why many men struggle to name their inner world and what it takes to reclaim curiosity, tenderness, and truth. Together, we talk about the nervous system, faith deconstruction, co-regulation, and why presence is the most healing thing we offer one another. This episode will meet you where you are and gently invite you further in.Takeaways“If I can’t be with it, I can’t heal it.” Naming precedes healing.Outsourcing your emotions to others is common—but it can become harmful.Co-regulation is foundational to emotional safety in relationships.Curiosity helps us approach our pain instead of controlling it.The nervous system needs safety to tell the truth.You can’t think your way into healing—your body has to believe it too.Presence is the most healing gift we can offer in a hurting world.Emotionally safe men are formed, not found.Check out more of Blake Blankenbecler: 🌐 Website – ⁠blakeblankenbecler.com ⁠📸 Instagram –⁠ @blakeblankenbecler⁠ The Friendship Deck: ⁠thefriendshipdeck.com⁠Learn more about Three Percent: 🌐⁠ www.threepercentco.comChapters(00:00) Meet Blake Blankenbecler – Therapist(03:00) Language for the Inner Life(06:00) What is Emotional Outsourcing?(10:00) The Power of Co-Regulation(14:00) Why Men Struggle to Name Emotions(18:00) Body-Based Healing and the Nervous System(22:00) From Christian Duty to Emotional Honesty(26:00) How Curiosity Changes the Healing Process(30:00) Practicing Emotional Responsibility(33:00) The Lie of Being Too Much(36:00) Faith, Attachment, and Embodied Safety(41:00) Relationships as the Place of Repair(45:00) Where to Find Blake OnlineKeywordsBlake Blankenbecler, Three Percent, emotional health, holistic masculinity, co-regulation, emotional outsourcing, nervous system healing, trauma recovery, therapy, men’s emotions, inner work, Christian deconstruction, embodiment, faith and healing, presence, emotional literacy, emotional responsibility, relationships, healing through connection, curiosity, somatic healing, mental health, attachment, tenderness, emotional safety

In this episode, hosts Blake and Jamie dive into the emotional lives of men—what we feel, what we’ve been taught to suppress, and what it might look like to live more honestly. They explore how fear, shame, and sadness often hide beneath anger, and why many men are disconnected from their bodies, relationships, and even themselves. From childhood messages to faith, parenting, and emotional repair, this conversation is vulnerable, practical, and full of grace. Whether you’re just beginning to name your emotions or walking others through healing, this episode offers language, insight, and permission to feel.TakeawaysAnger is often the visible emotion masking fear, shame, or sadness.Most men are taught to intellectualize or avoid emotions entirely.Emotional fluency begins with naming what’s actually happening inside.We often fear our emotions will make us weak—but vulnerability leads to strength.The body holds emotional wisdom many of us were never taught to trust.Emotional repair is possible in relationships when we lead with honesty.Faith, theology, and masculinity all shape how we relate to our emotions.Safety and curiosity are the prerequisites for emotional healing.ResourcesChip Dodd Emotions Chart: https://static1.squarespace.com/static/62e2d6c397d6ff1fd356ed8f/t/632cbee0b6a9703239cd018f/1725475063690/8+Feelings.pdf Learn more about Three Percent: 🌐⁠ www.threepercentco.com⁠ 📸 Instagram –⁠ @threepercentcoChapters(00:00) Welcome to the Emotions Episode(03:00) Why Talk About Emotions?(06:00) Men and the Fear of Feeling(09:00) What We Learned Growing Up About Emotions(12:00) Anger, Sadness, Shame—What’s Really Underneath?(16:00) Why Men Disconnect From the Body(20:00) Faith and Emotional Formation(25:00) Emotional Literacy in Parenting(28:00) When You Feel Unsafe in Relationship(32:00) The Power of Curiosity and Naming Emotions(36:00) Repair, Vulnerability, and Starting Again(40:00) Final Thoughts on Living Fully AliveKeywordsThree Percent, masculinity, emotions, emotional health, anger, fear, shame, sadness, vulnerability, holistic masculinity, emotional literacy, fatherhood, parenting, emotional intelligence, Christian men, faith and emotions, childhood wounds, trauma, inner work, embodiment, safety, repair, naming emotions, identity, integrity, spiritual formation, relationship dynamics

In this honest and redemptive episode, we talk with Young Woong Yi—pastor, church planter, and spiritual formation leader—about anger, masculinity, and becoming a safe man. Young shares how growing up in an immigrant household shaped his relationship with emotions, and how repressed sadness and generational patterns of power led to a breaking point in his marriage. He opens up about the life-saving intervention of his church, the deep healing that followed, and what it means to cultivate emotional safety in leadership, relationships, and spiritual formation. This episode is a masterclass in transformation, humility, and the long road to becoming whole.Takeaways“An emotionally volatile man is not a safe man.”Repressed anger often masks deeper emotions like sadness, fear, or shame.Emotional safety is a core component of holistic masculinity.The church can be a place of healing when leaders respond with grace.We often say to our spouse what we never got to say to our parents.Healing begins with language, awareness, and the courage to ask for help.Anger’s gift is advocacy—but only when processed with honesty and care.Spiritual formation must address emotional and mental health, not just theology.Check out more of Young Yi: 📸 Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/brotheryoung/Substack: https://substack.com/@brotheryoung 🌐 Church Plant – https://www.instagram.com/kindredchurchmi/Learn more about Three Percent: 🌐 https://threepercentco.com/Chapters(00:00) Meet Young Yi – Pastor, Photographer, Church Planter(02:00) Blake’s Story: Anger Repression and Performance(04:30) A Relationship with Anger?(07:00) Emotional Abuse, Immigrant Parenting, and Powering Up(10:00) Learning How to Win Through Anger(13:00) From Veterinary School to Ministry(16:00) Marriage as a Mirror: Anger Exposed(18:00) “You’re Bullying Me”: The Catalyst for Change(20:00) Church Leadership Responds with Grace(23:00) Six Months of Paid Leave and Intense Therapy(26:00) What Changed Young’s View of Masculinity(29:00) Anger Isn’t Always Justified Action(32:00) The Anger Iceberg & Sadness Beneath the Surface(35:00) Generational Messaging: “Men Don’t Cry”(38:00) Learning to Say: “That Made Me Really Sad”(41:00) Advocating for the Child Within(45:00) How Anger Impacts Spiritual Formation(49:00) Church Culture, Jesus, and Emotional Health(52:00) Final Encouragement to Men: Ask for Help(54:00) Where to Find Young & Kindred ChurchKeywordsYoung Yi, Three Percent, holistic masculinity, anger, emotional safety, immigrant family, Korean American, spiritual formation, church hurt, inner child, marriage counseling, masculinity and emotions, mental health in ministry, vulnerability, leadership, discipleship, shame, sadness, advocacy, safe men, healing, therapy, pastoral care, emotional intelligence, Kindred Church, genogram, Pete Scazzero, Voice of the Heart, Rich Villodas, Chip Dodd, Christian men, identity formation, marriage restoration

In this episode, we sit down with writer, editor, and host of The Writer’s Circle podcast, Will Parker Anderson. Will opens up about the intersection of storytelling and vulnerability, holistic masculinity modeled by Jesus, and why real writing—and real life—requires full presence. From discussing confession and shame to the importance of being known in community, this conversation offers wisdom for anyone seeking healing, depth, and the courage to be honest. Will’s pastoral insight and personal honesty will challenge and comfort you.TakeawaysThe best writing is the overflow of honest living.Holistic masculinity is modeled by Jesus—servanthood over dominance.We can’t be fully known by God if we hide from people.Vulnerability isn’t an event—it’s a habit of letting light in.Confession is painful but leads to soul-level relief and formation.Mentorship and trusted community are vital for healing.Truth-telling opens the door to connection and transformation.Check out more of Will Parker Anderson: 🌐 Website –⁠ writerscircle.co⁠ 🎙️ Podcast – ⁠The Writer’s Circle⁠Learn more about Three Percent: 🌐⁠ www.threepercentco.comChapters(00:00) Meet Will Parker Anderson (02:00) Writing as Overflow of Living (04:30) Holistic Masculinity as Servanthood (09:00) Vulnerability in Storytelling and Relationships (14:00) Why Men Struggle to Tell the Truth (18:00) You Can’t Be Known By God Without Being Known By Others (22:00) Healing from Hurt Happens in Relationship (26:00) The Poison and the Cure Grow Side-by-Side (30:00) Will’s Story of Confession and Grace (36:00) The Risk of Vulnerability (41:00) What Gets Affirmed Gets Repeated (45:00) Neurobiology of Being Seen and Known (50:00) Mentorship and Gentle Discipleship (54:00) Where to Find Will and Writer’s CircleKeywordsWill Parker Anderson, Three Percent, writing and vulnerability, storytelling, holistic masculinity, servanthood, confession, shame, grace, recovery, writer’s circle, Penguin Random House, Substack, emotional intelligence, community, mentorship, being known, faith and healing, honesty, Jesus, fatherhood, integrity, spiritual formation, trauma recovery, mental health, deconstruction, masculinity and faith, relational healing, writing process

In this powerful episode, we sit down with former NFL player and West Point graduate Caleb Campbell to explore his journey from performance-driven success to soul-level healing. Caleb shares how the pressure to be “America’s Athlete” led to emotional collapse—and ultimately, a profound spiritual transformation. Now a speaker and coach, Caleb helps others navigate “threshold moments” where letting go becomes the doorway to becoming more whole. We talk about masculinity, grief, addiction, expansion, and why every death can be a doorway to deeper life. This is not just a conversation—it’s a call to wholeness.TakeawaysHolistic masculinity is less about control and more about presence and emotional safety.Every expansion in life requires a letting go of what no longer serves us.We can’t criticize ourselves into healing—only compassion transforms us.Our greatest transformations often come through grief and ambiguity.External success without internal capacity leads to burnout and collapse.Spiritual growth means returning to what’s always been true: you are already held.Check out more of Caleb Campbell: 🌐 Website –⁠ www.calebcampbell.me⁠ 📸 Instagram –⁠ @caleb_campbell⁠Learn more about Three Percent: 🌐⁠ www.threepercentco.comChapters(00:00) Meeting Caleb Campbell – Athlete, Speaker, Threshold Guide(05:00) What is Holistic Masculinity?(09:00) Disconnection, Performance, and the Wounded Masculine(12:00) NFL Dreams & The Crisis of Identity(18:00) From NFL to Janitor: The Journey of Letting Go(21:00) Discovering Creativity and Storytelling(23:00) A $10,000 Gift & the Call to Keep Telling His Story(27:00) The Role of Grief in Spiritual Expansion(30:00) Ambiguous Grief & Redefining Loss(33:00) Trusting the Darkness as an Invitation(36:00) Choosing the Death That Makes You Bigger(40:00) Living with Original Knowing – You Are Already Held(45:00) Welcoming Home the Loyal Soldiers Within(48:00) Exvangelical Identity & Deconstructing with Compassion(53:00) Caleb’s Upcoming Book & Coaching Work(58:00) Final Reflections on Expansion, Soul Work, and Christ ConsciousnessKeywordsCaleb Campbell, Three Percent, holistic masculinity, grief, expansion, NFL, identity, soul work, spiritual formation, healing, threshold, emotional safety, original knowing, addiction recovery, exvangelical, compassion, personal growth, transformation, deconstruction, presence, wounded masculine, coaching, wholeness, self-awareness, leadership and well-being, emotional healing, men’s work, letting go, faith journey, Richard Rohr, Francis Weller, mysticism, spiritual awakening

In this episode, we talk with Ben Cremer—pastor, writer, and author of Into the Gray—about masculinity, humility, binary thinking, and the deep spiritual cost of choosing power over people. Ben opens up about his painful exit from denominational ministry, how his upbringing in Idaho shaped his faith, and why Jesus' model of strength challenges the dominant cultural narratives of manhood. We explore themes of empathy, nonviolence, spiritual formation, and the courage it takes to be curious and kind in polarized spaces. This conversation is a garden of nuance, honesty, and healing.TakeawaysHolistic masculinity looks like Jesus—not dominance, but humility and presence.Proximity breeds empathy; curiosity breeds compassion.We often choose power over love when fear leads our thinking.The Christian path is about cultivation, not conquest.Humility opens the door to transformation and healing.The incarnation shows us God’s way is relationship, not rigid belief.Repair is more important than rupture; we’re called to be Jesus’ hands, not the Savior.Check out more of Ben Cremer: Instagram –⁠ @brcremer⁠ Newsletter –⁠ Into the Gray⁠⁠Ben's Website⁠⁠Substack⁠⁠X⁠Learn more about Three Percent: 🌐⁠ www.threepercentco.comChapters(00:00) Introduction to Ben Cremer(02:10) Life, Family, and Ministry Roots in Idaho(07:00) Shifts in Denominational Alignment(12:00) Being Pushed Out of the Church You Love(15:00) What is Holistic Masculinity?(20:00) David, Strength, and God’s Rebuke through Nathan(23:00) Gardening vs. Gladiators – Chuck DeGroat's Reflection(26:00) Resurrection and the Garden Metaphor(29:00) Why Don’t We Get It? Power, Fear, and Control(34:00) The Power of Incarnation(37:00) Binary Thinking and the Cost of Certainty(43:00) Online Pastoral Ministry and Personal Boundaries(47:00) Humility in the Face of Misunderstanding(49:00) Final Reflections & Where to Find BenKeywordsBen Cremer, Three Percent, holistic masculinity, Into the Gray, Idaho, spiritual formation, Christian culture, emotional intelligence, binary thinking, fear and power, online ministry, pastoral pain, incarnation, gospel, humility, empathy, compassion, vulnerability, deconstruction, mental health, church hurt, curiosity, Jesus, masculinity, David and Nathan, spiritual growth, gardening metaphor, Chuck DeGroat, discipleship

In this episode, we engage in a deep conversation with Marc Typo about the complexities of fatherhood, masculinity, and emotional expression. We explore the challenges of raising children in a world that often stigmatizes vulnerability, particularly for men. Marc shares his experiences as a father and writer, emphasizing the importance of creating safe spaces for emotional expression and the need for holistic masculinity that embraces both strength and vulnerability. The discussion highlights the impact of upbringing on emotional regulation and the desire to break generational cycles of toxic masculinity.TakeawaysWriting about fatherhood helps Marc maintain focus on gratitude.We are born soft and emotional.It's important to model safety for our children.The lighthouse analogy reflects our role as parents.We need to allow men to be fragile and soft.Creating safe spaces for emotional expression is crucial.Check out more of Marc Typo:Website - ⁠https://www.raisingmyles.com/⁠Instagram - ⁠https://www.instagram.com/marc.typo⁠Learn more about Three Percent: ⁠www.threepercentco.comChapters00:00 Exploring Holistic Masculinity07:39 The Journey of Fatherhood12:48 Navigating Emotions and Vulnerability18:50 Selflessness in Parenting20:34 Navigating Fatherhood and Self-Reflection22:43 Confronting Internal Narratives23:59 Emotional Expression in Parenting26:44 Creating Safe Spaces for Children29:57 The Lighthouse Analogy in Parenting32:38 Understanding Softness and Strength36:33 The Journey Back to Emotional Authenticity41:10 Maintaining Safety Amidst TurbulenceKeywordsfatherhood, masculinity, vulnerability, emotional expression, parenting, holistic masculinity, self-awareness, emotional safety, black fatherhood, personal growth, marriage, emotional connection, shame, spirituality, Christian culture, identity, emotional health, integrity, healing, mental health, empathy, childhood experiences, self-compassion, self-contempt, recovery, holistic healing

In this episode, the hosts engage in a deep conversation with Sheila Wray Gregoire about the complexities of masculinity, vulnerability, and the challenges within marriage. They explore the impact of traditional teachings on relationships, the importance of emotional connection, and the mental load often carried by women. Sheila shares insights from her research on sexual satisfaction and the need for open communication in marriages. The discussion emphasizes the significance of creating safety in relationships and how positive changes can ripple through various aspects of a couple's life together.TakeawaysHealthy masculinity involves taking initiative to care for others.Vulnerability is essential for deeper connections in relationships.Research shows that traditional marriage teachings can harm both men and women.Emotional connection is crucial for marital satisfaction.Men often carry shame that affects their relationships.The mental load in marriages often falls disproportionately on women.Improving one aspect of a relationship can positively impact others.Communication about sex is often hindered by societal teachings.Creating safety in relationships allows for open conversations.Couples should work as partners to share responsibilities.Check out more of Sheila Wray Gregoire:Website - ⁠https://sheilawraygregoire.com/⁠Instagram - ⁠https://www.instagram.com/sheilagregoire/⁠Bare Marriage Podcast - ⁠https://www.buzzsprout.com/242918⁠Learn more about Three Percent: ⁠www.threepercentco.comChapters00:00 Defining Healthy Masculinity06:09 Sheila's Journey into Marriage and Sex Education09:32 Research Findings on Marriage and Sexual Satisfaction12:18 Challenging Evangelical Teachings15:14 The Impact of Cultural Narratives on Relationships18:22 Addressing Shame and Responsibility in Men21:09 Navigating Sexuality and Intimacy24:24 The Role of Communication in Healthy Relationships27:24 Concluding Thoughts and Future Directions33:40 Understanding Marriage as a Partnership34:47 The Importance of Emotional Connection37:23 Mental Load and Housework Dynamics41:05 The Unseen Burden of Kin Keeping47:34 The Unfairness Threshold in Marriages49:25 Creating Smooth Roads in Relationships54:02 Navigating Shame and Vulnerability59:34 The Ripple Effect of ConnectionKeywordsmasculinity, vulnerability, marriage, emotional connection, sexual satisfaction, gender roles, communication, shame, mental load, relationships, spirituality, Christian culture, identity, emotional health, integrity, healing, mental health, empathy, grief, emotional health, mental health resources, holistic masculinity, vulnerability, fatherhood, childhood experiences, self-compassion, shame, self-contempt, recovery, emotional safety, holistic healing

In this episode, Brian Lee discusses the often-overlooked topic of spiritual abuse and its profound impact on individuals' lives. He shares his journey from being a pastor to creating the nonprofit Broken to Beloved, which aims to support survivors of spiritual abuse. The conversation delves into the definition of holistic masculinity, the importance of safety and trust in relationships, and the healing process that involves recognizing one's story and integrating all parts of oneself. Brian emphasizes the need for community support and grace in the journey of recovery, ultimately leading to a deeper understanding of faith and belonging.TakeawaysHolistic masculinity means integrating all parts of oneself.Spiritual abuse uses God's words to dehumanize individuals.Healing requires recognizing and naming trauma.Safety in relationships is foundational for trust.The journey of healing is often long and complex.Community support is vital for recovery from spiritual abuse.Understanding one's story is crucial for healing.Grace and compassion towards oneself are essential.The hierarchy of belovedness includes safety, connection, trust, vulnerability, and intimacy.Healing from spiritual abuse can lead to a deeper understanding of faith.Check out more of Broken to Beloved:Website - ⁠https://www.brokentobeloved.org/⁠Donate - ⁠https://www.brokentobeloved.org/support⁠Instagram - ⁠https://www.instagram.com/brokentobeloved⁠Substack - ⁠https://brokentobeloved.substack.com/⁠Broken to Beloved Podcast - ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2RcmVVeoNVuaZ7VT37YKrc?si=38911bd34a8a48e0Chapters00:00 Brian's Background and Journey04:35 Understanding Spiritual Abuse07:26 The Impact of Spiritual Abuse10:19 Cultural and Racial Influences13:35 The Importance of Storytelling16:21 The Hierarchy of Belovedness26:56 Building Trust Through Vulnerability31:16 Understanding Safety and Self-Regulation37:14 The Connection Between Body Awareness and Safety43:30 Navigating Faith and Safety in Church Spaces46:56 Finding Safety in Curiosity and Healing52:30 The Journey from Brokenness to BelovedKeywordsmasculinity, spirituality, Christian culture, identity, emotional health, storytelling, friendship, integrity, healing, mental health, empathy, grief, emotional health, community support, mental health resources, holistic masculinity, vulnerability, embodiment, fatherhood, childhood experiences, inner child, self-compassion, shame, self-contempt, workshops, mental health, spiritual abuse, trauma, community support, faith, recovery, emotional safety, holistic healing

In this episode, we engage in a deep conversation with Dr. Andrew Bauman about holistic masculinity, vulnerability, and the importance of self-compassion. We explore the impact of childhood experiences on adult behavior, the significance of engaging with one's inner child, and the role of embodiment in therapy. The discussion also touches on the challenges of fatherhood, navigating shame, and the necessity of truth in relationships. The episode concludes with insights into workshops and resources available for men seeking healing and integration.TakeawaysHolistic masculinity involves embracing vulnerability and healing.Self-compassion is essential in overcoming shame and self-contempt.Childhood experiences significantly shape adult behavior and relationships.Embodiment practices can enhance therapeutic experiences.Navigating fatherhood requires awareness of one's own wounds.Truth-telling is a powerful tool for liberation and healing.Workshops can provide valuable resources for men seeking support.The journey of healing is ongoing and requires commitment.Creating safe spaces for men to express emotions is vital.Check out more of Dr. Andrew Bauman:Website - ⁠https://andrewjbauman.com/⁠Intensive Workshops - ⁠https://christiancc.org/⁠Instagram - ⁠https://www.instagram.com/drandrewjbauman/Chapters08:36 Dr. Andrew Bauman's Journey11:46 The Impact of Family Dynamics14:25 Engaging with Grief and Loss17:44 The Importance of Male Embodiment20:30 Somatic Exercises for Healing23:31 Integrating the Inner Child26:22 The Role of Truth in Healing29:33 Workshops and Resources for Men32:36 Closing Thoughts and Future Conversations45:22 Exploring Vulnerability and HealingKeywordsmasculinity, spirituality, social justice, teaching, creativity, Christian culture, identity, emotional health, storytelling, friendship, integrity, healing, mental health, empathy, grief, emotional health, community support, mental health resources, holistic masculinity, vulnerability, embodiment, fatherhood, childhood experiences, inner child, self-compassion, shame, self-contempt, workshops, mental health