

What If Anger Isn’t The Problem? with Young Yi
In this honest and redemptive episode, we talk with Young Woong Yi—pastor, church planter, and spiritual formation leader—about anger, masculinity, and becoming a safe man. Young shares how growing up in an immigrant household shaped his relationship with emotions, and how repressed sadness and generational patterns of power led to a breaking point in his marriage. He opens up about the life-saving intervention of his church, the deep healing that followed, and what it means to cultivate emotional safety in leadership, relationships, and spiritual formation. This episode is a masterclass in transformation, humility, and the long road to becoming whole.
Takeaways
- “An emotionally volatile man is not a safe man.”
- Repressed anger often masks deeper emotions like sadness, fear, or shame.
- Emotional safety is a core component of holistic masculinity.
- The church can be a place of healing when leaders respond with grace.
- We often say to our spouse what we never got to say to our parents.
- Healing begins with language, awareness, and the courage to ask for help.
- Anger’s gift is advocacy—but only when processed with honesty and care.
- Spiritual formation must address emotional and mental health, not just theology.
Check out more of Young Yi:
📸 Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/brotheryoung/
Substack: https://substack.com/@brotheryoung
🌐 Church Plant – https://www.instagram.com/kindredchurchmi/
Learn more about Three Percent: 🌐 https://threepercentco.com/
Chapters
(00:00) Meet Young Yi – Pastor, Photographer, Church Planter
(02:00) Blake’s Story: Anger Repression and Performance
(04:30) A Relationship with Anger?
(07:00) Emotional Abuse, Immigrant Parenting, and Powering Up
(10:00) Learning How to Win Through Anger
(13:00) From Veterinary School to Ministry
(16:00) Marriage as a Mirror: Anger Exposed
(18:00) “You’re Bullying Me”: The Catalyst for Change
(20:00) Church Leadership Responds with Grace
(23:00) Six Months of Paid Leave and Intense Therapy
(26:00) What Changed Young’s View of Masculinity
(29:00) Anger Isn’t Always Justified Action
(32:00) The Anger Iceberg & Sadness Beneath the Surface
(35:00) Generational Messaging: “Men Don’t Cry”
(38:00) Learning to Say: “That Made Me Really Sad”
(41:00) Advocating for the Child Within
(45:00) How Anger Impacts Spiritual Formation
(49:00) Church Culture, Jesus, and Emotional Health
(52:00) Final Encouragement to Men: Ask for Help
(54:00) Where to Find Young & Kindred Church
Keywords
Young Yi, Three Percent, holistic masculinity, anger, emotional safety, immigrant family, Korean American, spiritual formation, church hurt, inner child, marriage counseling, masculinity and emotions, mental health in ministry, vulnerability, leadership, discipleship, shame, sadness, advocacy, safe men, healing, therapy, pastoral care, emotional intelligence, Kindred Church, genogram, Pete Scazzero, Voice of the Heart, Rich Villodas, Chip Dodd, Christian men, identity formation, marriage restoration