Smeared Mascara

Send us a textSome of you may have noticed that there was no new episode last week. The LA fires and everything else in the world were too much for the ladies. There was a recording and it was unhinged. Never fear because Brooke and Mandy are back! They’re taking pop culture moments directly from TikTok and explaining their relevance to you. Hear how Spanx and handbags are the new coping mechanisms for 2025. Can you say snatched in style?There is major shade and cancellation being thrown at the presidential inauguration performers. Bye Carrie and the guys who sings the song from Cars!And of course the conversation turns to gastrointestinal stories because farts are funny… most of the time. Brooke and Mandy retell the joys of colonoscopies and ponder why they get a bad rap. Make Colonoscopies Fun Again! Don’t forget to listen with caution because the language is vulgar and nasty. It’s best to listen to Smeared Mascara after carpool and before church. TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Send us a textThis episode was recorded on January 6, 2025. No masks or vaccines required. Certain constitutional rights are favored while others are disregarded. Don’t tread on my wall or my trad wife.Smeared Mascara officially rings in the new year with goals and positivity. Brooke and Mandy are working towards being authentic and confident beezies. Golden Globes fashion is discussed even though neither host watched the award show. Hooray for social media and modern journalism! Brooke informs us about the viral sorority text from 2013 and Mandy reveals her glow-up plan for the year.Remember that this podcast isn’t for baby ears and that vulgarities are frequently used as well as encouraged.  Put your Honda Civic Si into fifth gear because Smeared Mascara is taking you for a trip!TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Send us a textIn this week’s episode, Brooke and Mandy profess their love of Caleb Hearon and their disdain of bong rips in the city.Goals for 2025 are discussed briefly. The ADHD train quickly leaves the station and new topics are introduced like migraines, Ash Trevino, and Dave Chappell air fresheners. Join the ladies of Smeared Mascara in saying adios to 2024!Don’t forget to put ear muffs on the kiddies because as always, the language is inappropriate. You’re welcome. TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Send us a textIt’s a double shot of Smeared Mascara!Mandy is coming in HOT and Brooke is adding the lighter fluid to this inferno. Listen to the ladies talk about White Elephant gift exchange trauma, Christmas shopping, and holiday card conflict. Honorable mention to the Rage Poop discussion and Benny Blanco’s pedi game.Brooke talks about how the new year will bring new skincare and clothes resulting in the fiercest glow up, and possible hoe up. (Mandy’s words, not Brooke’s) Artificial tea is contaminating suburbia and these bitches are not about it. Spill with caution.So turn down the yacht rock and turn up the pod. You’re about to be exposed to the tastemakers of the MTV generation. Language is realistic and harsh. You know what to do. Listen responsibly and enjoy Smeared Mascara!TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Send us a textJoin the ladies of Smeared Mascara as they discuss the latest in pop culture and their lives. They cover drones, Luigi Mangione, and High Body Count Hair.The language in this episode will probably get Brooke and Mandy on the Naughty List, but they’re used to empty stockings. Please listen with caution, duh.So ignore that tsunami warning and enjoy the latest episode of Smeared Mascara.TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Send us a textIt’s the most anticipated episode of the year. You’re invited to Mandy’s Shitty Birthday, Part 2. (Wondering about part one? Check out episode 10 of season 1.) There’s a chance that things may have improved from last year.  You be the judge.Boundaries are being set around the Thanksgiving table this year, and lasagna is the new turkey. Pass the Tums.Listen as the ladies work through a real-time anxiety attack. Let us know if box breathing or touching grass has ever helped you. Brooke is pushing back on natural remedies and is summoning chemical calm to the panic party. So pack your bags and grab your passports because these hoochies are headed to Mexico for some plastic surgery! Actually, Brooke and Mandy are still in the conceptual stages of forming these plans. Stay tuned.As always, listen with caution in public spaces. You know why!TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Send us a textWelcome back to your favorite podcast, Smeared Mascara. This episode contains a cornucopia of topics. There is something from everyone. Maybe?  Probably. It’s an audio gift and there are no returns or exchanges.The ladies talk about Lula’s latest surgical procedure and how inspirational it is. Bitch is snatched and we love it! Brooke brings up Yacht Rock which naturally leads to a Michael McDonald/Kenny Loggins discussion and the rise and fall of their careers.Mandy gives an unsolicited review about the movie Heretic. Is Hugh Grant still lovable and charming? Say a prayer and let us know.The ladies also chat about Instagram-able dates, Tiny Desk concerts, and the Ketamine Horse.  Grab a saddle and giddy up!So put in your AirPods and tune out the world because Smeared Mascara is about to drop some pop culture chisme!  **Sharing social media is a love language. Please share our podcast with the ones you love.TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Send us a textGet ready for a super positive and inspirational episode! Just kidding, this is Smeared Mascara after all. Brooke and Mandy are still coping with the disappointment of the presidential election. They are trying their best to spiral up but the universe is really making that challenging.Luckily the ladies remember how fortunate they are to have access to good food, good music, and social media.There is major Glorilla love this episode. Don’t know her? Look her up, she’s awesome. She’s the G-L-O with the G-L-E, uhhh uhhh.So get your extensions installed before those tariffs kick in and enjoy another episode of Smeared Mascara.As always, be mindful of your surroundings when listening to the pod. Although these ladies have burr-tiful spurrits, they have filthy mouths. TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Send us a textThis episode we find the ladies trying to face the harsh reality of US politics. How long will they last as Marthas in this Handmaids Tale horror/reality? Brooke and Mandy analyze the pros and cons of micro dosing and imagine how it would be to trip balls while pushing 50. Also, their social media friend lists have been cleansed. No access to the personal lives of these superstars if you don’t support it! Grab your bonnets and capes because we’re fighting the patriarchy! TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Send us a textThere’s no room for negativity and doubt in this episode of Smeared Mascara. Brooke is bringing the rainbows and sunshine while Mandy is trying her best to not be such a Scorpio. It’s World Series time and Brooke keeps us updated on the battle between the Dodgers and Yankees, as well as tributes dedicated to the late Fernando Valenzuela. The ladies discuss what their Club Giggly lewks could be and should be. Will Crocs be involved? Only time will tell.Lastly, there is the inevitable expression of political views by these two feisty, frustrated, and intelligent Hot Mamas. You know the drill, skeee-yeee!So turn down the treble and pump that bass so that Smeared Mascara can be heard all over the place!TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel