How Not To Suck At Divorce: Divorce Advice and Relatable Humor
Morgan Stogsdill and Andrea Rappaport
How Not to Suck at Divorce guides anyone who’s divorcing or even just considering divorce. Hosted by Morgan Stogsdill and Andrea Rappaport, the show delivers equal parts strategy, empathy, and humor.
Morgan Stogsdill is a powerhouse family law attorney and head of family law at the largest firm in the United States. She’s seen every curveball, knows the difference between drama and strategy, and helps clients avoid costly mistakes. Andrea Rappaport is a comedian, marketing pro, and divorced-then-happily-remarried mom who has made the exact painful mistakes we beg you not to repeat. Together, we’ve built a podcast that blends courtroom-level insight with compassionate, practical moves you can use the second the episode ends.
Our community is loyal, our guests are leaders, and our episodes are packed with value. In short: listening to How Not to Suck at Divorce will help you avoid major divorce mistakes.
We launched this show to fill the gap between “funny but fluffy” podcasts and “useful but soul-crushing” legal jargon. The goal: actionable empathy. With scripts, checklists, and boundaries ready, you’ll make fewer panic decisions and save money, time, and sanity.
What We Cover
Should I stay or should I go? Decision-making frameworks, acronyms, and step-by-step exercises for clarity.
Co-parenting and high-conflict personalities. We unpack narcissist dynamics, manipulation tactics, and non-reactive communication. (We even created a framework called “WTF” to help you remember it when your brain is on fire.)
The BIFF method and conflict de-escalation. With Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute, we translate his tools into real-world texts and emails you can send without blowing up your case.
Tech safety and AI mistakes. Steven Bradley, former FBI agent and digital safety expert (“Tech Cowboy”), explains how tech evidence, AI hallucinations, and smart device trails can help—or hurt—your case.
Prenups, financial transparency, and power dynamics. Guests like Katie Post share what to include, what to avoid, and how to start the conversation before things go off the rails.
That’s our recipe: expert interviews + practical tools + humor that keeps you breathing. Episodes are short enough for a dog walk but deep enough to change your next decision.
Who You’ll Hear
We curate guests who’ve sat in every chair—lawyers, therapists, digital forensics pros, financial planners, safety advocates, and survivors who turned their mess into a roadmap.
Bill Eddy (High Conflict Institute): BIFF and EAR techniques, parallel parenting, and communication guardrails.
Steven Bradley (former FBI “Tech Cowboy”): Digital breadcrumbs, evidence handling, and how AI can backfire in divorce.
Dr. Nadine Macaluso (therapist, trauma specialist): Love-bombing, trauma bonds, and healing after divorce.
Joanna Strober (Midi Health): Resilience, perimenopause, career pivots, and financial autonomy.
Core Topics
Divorce Strategy & Family Law: prenups, mediation vs. litigation, custody agreements, relocation, settlement strategy.
High-Conflict & Safety: coercive control, gaslighting, DARVO, BIFF vs. gray-rocking, protective orders, tech hygiene.
Co-Parenting & Parallel Parenting: calendars, school/holiday schedules, and communication protocols.
Money & Power: financial disclosure, tracing assets, budgeting, and managing fees.
Mindset & Mental Health: compartmentalizing, trigger management, boundary scripts, and choosing the right therapist or coach.
Our show is both resourceful and entertaining. You’ll laugh, take notes, and walk away feeling less alone. With 160+ episodes and weekly updates, How Not to Suck at Divorce has become a trusted resource worldwide.
Whether you’re in the middle of a divorce, just considering it, or rebuilding afterward, this podcast helps you breathe easier, protect your sanity, and avoid the mistakes that cost people the most.
You’ll get through this. We promise. You’ve got this… and we’ve got you.
Morgan Stogsdill is a powerhouse family law attorney and head of family law at the largest firm in the United States. She’s seen every curveball, knows the difference between drama and strategy, and helps clients avoid costly mistakes. Andrea Rappaport is a comedian, marketing pro, and divorced-then-happily-remarried mom who has made the exact painful mistakes we beg you not to repeat. Together, we’ve built a podcast that blends courtroom-level insight with compassionate, practical moves you can use the second the episode ends.
Our community is loyal, our guests are leaders, and our episodes are packed with value. In short: listening to How Not to Suck at Divorce will help you avoid major divorce mistakes.
We launched this show to fill the gap between “funny but fluffy” podcasts and “useful but soul-crushing” legal jargon. The goal: actionable empathy. With scripts, checklists, and boundaries ready, you’ll make fewer panic decisions and save money, time, and sanity.
What We Cover
Should I stay or should I go? Decision-making frameworks, acronyms, and step-by-step exercises for clarity.
Co-parenting and high-conflict personalities. We unpack narcissist dynamics, manipulation tactics, and non-reactive communication. (We even created a framework called “WTF” to help you remember it when your brain is on fire.)
The BIFF method and conflict de-escalation. With Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute, we translate his tools into real-world texts and emails you can send without blowing up your case.
Tech safety and AI mistakes. Steven Bradley, former FBI agent and digital safety expert (“Tech Cowboy”), explains how tech evidence, AI hallucinations, and smart device trails can help—or hurt—your case.
Prenups, financial transparency, and power dynamics. Guests like Katie Post share what to include, what to avoid, and how to start the conversation before things go off the rails.
That’s our recipe: expert interviews + practical tools + humor that keeps you breathing. Episodes are short enough for a dog walk but deep enough to change your next decision.
Who You’ll Hear
We curate guests who’ve sat in every chair—lawyers, therapists, digital forensics pros, financial planners, safety advocates, and survivors who turned their mess into a roadmap.
Bill Eddy (High Conflict Institute): BIFF and EAR techniques, parallel parenting, and communication guardrails.
Steven Bradley (former FBI “Tech Cowboy”): Digital breadcrumbs, evidence handling, and how AI can backfire in divorce.
Dr. Nadine Macaluso (therapist, trauma specialist): Love-bombing, trauma bonds, and healing after divorce.
Joanna Strober (Midi Health): Resilience, perimenopause, career pivots, and financial autonomy.
Core Topics
Divorce Strategy & Family Law: prenups, mediation vs. litigation, custody agreements, relocation, settlement strategy.
High-Conflict & Safety: coercive control, gaslighting, DARVO, BIFF vs. gray-rocking, protective orders, tech hygiene.
Co-Parenting & Parallel Parenting: calendars, school/holiday schedules, and communication protocols.
Money & Power: financial disclosure, tracing assets, budgeting, and managing fees.
Mindset & Mental Health: compartmentalizing, trigger management, boundary scripts, and choosing the right therapist or coach.
Our show is both resourceful and entertaining. You’ll laugh, take notes, and walk away feeling less alone. With 160+ episodes and weekly updates, How Not to Suck at Divorce has become a trusted resource worldwide.
Whether you’re in the middle of a divorce, just considering it, or rebuilding afterward, this podcast helps you breathe easier, protect your sanity, and avoid the mistakes that cost people the most.
You’ll get through this. We promise. You’ve got this… and we’ve got you.
Episodes
Mentioned books
Oct 26, 2024 • 40min
128. Is Your Divorce Driving You to Drink Too Much?
In this episode, we explore the relationship between alcohol and divorce, diving into how exactly how drinking impacts your emotional state, decision-making, and overall well-being during one of life’s most challenging times. This episode IS NOT about giving up drinking completely; it’s about understanding when alcohol is helping or hurting as you navigate the divorce process.In this episode, you'll learn:-What actually happens in your brain when you drink to cope with stress?-How do you know if you're drinking for the wrong reasons?-What are the warning signs that you’re blowing past your emotional "stop signs"?-What action steps can you take to keep your relationship with alcohol in check during a divorce?Our guest, Colleen Kachmann, known as the "Hangover Whisperer," is a recovery-certified master coach and an expert in alcohol use awareness. She shares science-backed insights on the impact of alcohol on the body and mind during stressful periods and offers practical advice on mindful drinking.Remember, this episode is here to guide you without judgment—only support. Whether you decide to drink less, stay mindful, or seek more support, we’re here to help you navigate this journey in the healthiest way possible.Connect with Colleen: Website: https://www.colleenkachmann.com/Instagram: @thehangoverwhispererTiktok: @hangoverwhispererOur Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Oct 18, 2024 • 51min
127. The C Word: Custody (The Unavoidable Part of Divorce)
In today’s episode, we’re tackling one of the toughest realities of divorce: custody. Custody arrangements can feel unnatural, overwhelming, and emotional. Deciding when and how much time you spend with your children after a divorce is never easy, but it’s an unavoidable part of the process. In this episode, we break down how to handle custody agreements, how to mentally prepare for time away from your kids, and what you need to know to navigate this difficult terrain.We share personal insights and experiences, including the pain of feeling like you’re “having your cake and eating it too” and how to come to terms with these challenging decisions. Special guest Heather Quick, founder of the Florida Women’s Law Group, joins us to explain how custody laws have changed in Florida and what that means for parents.In this episode, you’ll learn:Why custody arrangements can feel so unnatural and how to start accepting this new reality.How the new Florida custody law that assumes 50/50 time-sharing affects parents.The importance of planning for holidays, summers, and unexpected changes in parenting plans.How to prioritize your children's needs while managing your own emotions and mental health.Why you need to think long-term when negotiating custody agreements.We answer the questions:What do you do when you just can’t agree to 50/50 custody?How do you plan custody arrangements for holidays and summers?What are some real-life examples of custody agreements that work (and don’t work)?Is it really possible to modify a custody plan later?How do you start emotionally preparing for time away from your kids?Whether you're in the middle of a custody battle, preparing for it, or just want more insight into how to handle this part of divorce, this episode will give you the perspective and tools you need to navigate this tough chapter with more clarity. You’ve got this, and we’ve got you!Connect with Heather:Website: https://www.floridawomenslawgroup.com/Tune in to learn how you can handle these difficult decisions without losing your sanity (or your dignity).Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Oct 15, 2024 • 45min
126. Is Your Spouse Stringing You Along? (Not Divorcing, but not "Happily Married")
In this episode, we dive into the difficult topic of feeling strung along in a marriage. Whether your spouse is coming and going as they please or avoiding making a decision about your future together, it can leave you feeling powerless. The hosts discuss how midlife changes like perimenopause and stress only make these dynamics more challenging, but the real focus is on how to take back your power by setting boundaries.Morgan shares a real-life story about a client stuck in this frustrating limbo, and they explore how setting boundaries—though scary—can be the key to getting clarity in your relationship. With humor and compassion, they tackle why it’s so important to reclaim control, even if it means being labeled the "bad guy."In this Episode, You’ll Learn:How to recognize if you're being strung along in your marriage.Why setting boundaries might be the healthiest move (even if it feels terrifying).How midlife changes like perimenopause can impact your emotional and mental well-being.What to do when your spouse seems to have one foot in and one foot out of the relationship.Why sometimes being the bad guy is the best thing you can do for yourself.How hair extensions may not save your marriage, but they sure can comfort you through tough times.Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Oct 4, 2024 • 52min
125. Best Kept Divorce Secrets (Save Your Money and Sanity)
In today's episode, it's REAL TALK as we tackle some of the biggest hurdles in divorce—financials, legal strategy, and emotional resilience. We talk about staying calm under pressure, understanding your finances, and working effectively with your attorney.Are you feeling overwhelmed by the flood of legal requests? Unsure whether you're working with the right attorney? Or maybe you're wondering what purchases to make before you file for divorce? These are just some of the questions we tackle in this episode.Key Questions Explored:Do you really have to respond to every demand from your ex immediately?What simple action can help you reset when you're overwhelmed?Why might a phone call or face-to-face meeting with your attorney be a smarter move than sending another email?What should you do if you're unsure your attorney is the right fit for you?Is there a smart time to make big purchases before your divorce?How can you protect what you brought into the marriage, financially?What red flags should you watch for during the divorce process?Can understanding tax implications actually help you negotiate better terms?Hit play for these practical tips and secrets to help you feel more confident and in control during your divorce.Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Sep 27, 2024 • 50min
124. Can You Even Afford to Get Divorced?!
In today's episode, guess what we’re tackling today? Yep—money. Let’s be honest, talking finances is about as fun as doing taxes, but it’s one of the biggest reasons people hit pause on their divorce plans. Fear of the unknown can be paralyzing, but don’t worry, we’ve got you covered!Joining us is Phil Weiss, a certified CPA, CFA, and RLP (that’s fancy speak for financial wizard 🧙♂️), and he’s here to break down the scary stuff. Phil’s personal story is a reminder of why understanding your finances is key, and he’ll guide us through the basics—from budget apps to aligning your money with your values (yes, that’s a thing).We’re diving into how to plan financially before, during, and after your divorce, and why having the right attorney is as crucial as knowing how to log into your online bank account (don’t act like you haven’t forgotten!).Tune in for some straight talk, practical tips, and a whole lot of empowerment as you tackle those financial fears head-on.Schedule a free consultation with Phil HEREOur Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Sep 20, 2024 • 1h 9min
123. The Hidden Dangers of Pretending You're Not Suffering in Your Marriage (Divorce Mental Prep)
In today's episode, we talk to therapist Hilary Rosenberg for a candid conversation about the challenges of recognizing and addressing deep-rooted issues in marriage. We explore the psychological effects of denial, the toll pretense takes on personal well-being and children, and why it’s essential to speak out about relationship struggles. Hilary shares insights on attachment styles and the importance of self-awareness, offers practical steps for navigating emotional turmoil and contemplating divorce with clarity and mental well-being. You got this, friend!Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckAnd if you're looking for the link to the magical eyelid lifters...you're 100% not alone...Andrea tried them after this episode was recorded and is obsessed. Here's the amazon link: https://shorturl.at/pINWjFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Connect with Hilary: Website: https://www.millenniumhope.comInstagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Sep 13, 2024 • 47min
122. Shocking Celebrity Divorce Stories and What YOU Can Learn From Them!
You are in for a juicy treat, friends! In today's episode, we bring on shareholder and family law attorney Kara Chrobak who specializes in high-net-worth divorce to talk about various infamous celebrity divorces! That's right- We touch on Jennifer Lopez & Ben Affleck, Channing Tatum & Jenna Dewan, and Billy Ray Cyrus & Fire Rose. We explore legal intricacies such as the lack of prenups, intellectual property disputes, and contested spending, equitable vs. community property states, importance of identifying intangible assets, and understanding alimony. You DON'T want to miss this one.Connect with Kara:Linked inOur Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Sep 6, 2024 • 41min
121. DO NOT Fall for These Common Divorce Misconceptions!
We're baaaack! And today we're talking about common divorce myths and you know how we do- we're providing practical advice for navigating high-conflict separations. The episode addresses misconceptions about co-parenting, alimony, legal advantages for moms, and the impact of infidelity. We also examine the realistic limitations of court intervention in cases of emotional abuse and share personal success stories to inspire hope for post-divorce happiness.Join our private Facebook community!Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantastic resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Aug 11, 2024 • 37min
120. What a Dr Sees from Patients in Bad Marriages...(special re Air)
In this important re-air, we're here with Dr. Meaghan Boston Daly to talk about divorce and physical wellness. Dr. Meg is a concierge internal medicine doctor in Chicago and has quite the resume. We're so excited to be able to pick her beautiful brain. **And if you're already contemplating divorce, go check out our crash course. Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course We'll discuss how being in an unhappy marriage really wears us down. Dr. Meg will tell us all about the subtle physical symptoms of emotional stress, Morgan will answer if your spouse can find out if you're on medication for your mental health during the divorce process, and Andrea will share about the connection between her body pain and being in a toxic marriage. Where to find Dr. Meg: www.harper-health.com Our Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck Friends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.
Jul 27, 2024 • 1h 6min
119. What Most Divorce Attorneys Won't Tell You
Oh friends, you won't want to miss this episode. Morgan and Andrea are back this week (with an amazing re-air) with top Dallas family law attorney, Rebecca Armstong, find her here! talking about the things you SHOULD and SHOULDN'T do after you file for divorce. First off, do you have the DCC??? If not, you 100% need this tool so you don't totally screw up in your divorce process. It will save you THOUSANDS of dollars!! GET IT HERE! Rebecca, Morgan and Andrea answer: -What 3 things should you do after you file for divorce? -What 3 things should you absolutely NOT do after you file for divorce? -Do I need a therapist if I'm going through a divorce? -Can being in therapy be used against me if I'm going through a divorce? -Why should I go to an annual checkup at the doctor during a divorce? -Can I record my spouse during an argument and use it during divorce proceedings? -Will my spending habits be scrutinized during a divorce? -What advice did Oprah give Andrea about her own divorce? *************** Let's talk about co parenting, shall we?? Our Family Wizard is here to help you with your co parenting journey and we are HUGE fans of what they do. http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck
