How Not To Suck At Divorce: Divorce Advice and Relatable Humor
Morgan Stogsdill and Andrea Rappaport
How Not to Suck at Divorce guides anyone who’s divorcing or even just considering divorce. Hosted by Morgan Stogsdill and Andrea Rappaport, the show delivers equal parts strategy, empathy, and humor.
Morgan Stogsdill is a powerhouse family law attorney and head of family law at the largest firm in the United States. She’s seen every curveball, knows the difference between drama and strategy, and helps clients avoid costly mistakes. Andrea Rappaport is a comedian, marketing pro, and divorced-then-happily-remarried mom who has made the exact painful mistakes we beg you not to repeat. Together, we’ve built a podcast that blends courtroom-level insight with compassionate, practical moves you can use the second the episode ends.
Our community is loyal, our guests are leaders, and our episodes are packed with value. In short: listening to How Not to Suck at Divorce will help you avoid major divorce mistakes.
We launched this show to fill the gap between “funny but fluffy” podcasts and “useful but soul-crushing” legal jargon. The goal: actionable empathy. With scripts, checklists, and boundaries ready, you’ll make fewer panic decisions and save money, time, and sanity.
What We Cover
Should I stay or should I go? Decision-making frameworks, acronyms, and step-by-step exercises for clarity.
Co-parenting and high-conflict personalities. We unpack narcissist dynamics, manipulation tactics, and non-reactive communication. (We even created a framework called “WTF” to help you remember it when your brain is on fire.)
The BIFF method and conflict de-escalation. With Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute, we translate his tools into real-world texts and emails you can send without blowing up your case.
Tech safety and AI mistakes. Steven Bradley, former FBI agent and digital safety expert (“Tech Cowboy”), explains how tech evidence, AI hallucinations, and smart device trails can help—or hurt—your case.
Prenups, financial transparency, and power dynamics. Guests like Katie Post share what to include, what to avoid, and how to start the conversation before things go off the rails.
That’s our recipe: expert interviews + practical tools + humor that keeps you breathing. Episodes are short enough for a dog walk but deep enough to change your next decision.
Who You’ll Hear
We curate guests who’ve sat in every chair—lawyers, therapists, digital forensics pros, financial planners, safety advocates, and survivors who turned their mess into a roadmap.
Bill Eddy (High Conflict Institute): BIFF and EAR techniques, parallel parenting, and communication guardrails.
Steven Bradley (former FBI “Tech Cowboy”): Digital breadcrumbs, evidence handling, and how AI can backfire in divorce.
Dr. Nadine Macaluso (therapist, trauma specialist): Love-bombing, trauma bonds, and healing after divorce.
Joanna Strober (Midi Health): Resilience, perimenopause, career pivots, and financial autonomy.
Core Topics
Divorce Strategy & Family Law: prenups, mediation vs. litigation, custody agreements, relocation, settlement strategy.
High-Conflict & Safety: coercive control, gaslighting, DARVO, BIFF vs. gray-rocking, protective orders, tech hygiene.
Co-Parenting & Parallel Parenting: calendars, school/holiday schedules, and communication protocols.
Money & Power: financial disclosure, tracing assets, budgeting, and managing fees.
Mindset & Mental Health: compartmentalizing, trigger management, boundary scripts, and choosing the right therapist or coach.
Our show is both resourceful and entertaining. You’ll laugh, take notes, and walk away feeling less alone. With 160+ episodes and weekly updates, How Not to Suck at Divorce has become a trusted resource worldwide.
Whether you’re in the middle of a divorce, just considering it, or rebuilding afterward, this podcast helps you breathe easier, protect your sanity, and avoid the mistakes that cost people the most.
You’ll get through this. We promise. You’ve got this… and we’ve got you.
Morgan Stogsdill is a powerhouse family law attorney and head of family law at the largest firm in the United States. She’s seen every curveball, knows the difference between drama and strategy, and helps clients avoid costly mistakes. Andrea Rappaport is a comedian, marketing pro, and divorced-then-happily-remarried mom who has made the exact painful mistakes we beg you not to repeat. Together, we’ve built a podcast that blends courtroom-level insight with compassionate, practical moves you can use the second the episode ends.
Our community is loyal, our guests are leaders, and our episodes are packed with value. In short: listening to How Not to Suck at Divorce will help you avoid major divorce mistakes.
We launched this show to fill the gap between “funny but fluffy” podcasts and “useful but soul-crushing” legal jargon. The goal: actionable empathy. With scripts, checklists, and boundaries ready, you’ll make fewer panic decisions and save money, time, and sanity.
What We Cover
Should I stay or should I go? Decision-making frameworks, acronyms, and step-by-step exercises for clarity.
Co-parenting and high-conflict personalities. We unpack narcissist dynamics, manipulation tactics, and non-reactive communication. (We even created a framework called “WTF” to help you remember it when your brain is on fire.)
The BIFF method and conflict de-escalation. With Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute, we translate his tools into real-world texts and emails you can send without blowing up your case.
Tech safety and AI mistakes. Steven Bradley, former FBI agent and digital safety expert (“Tech Cowboy”), explains how tech evidence, AI hallucinations, and smart device trails can help—or hurt—your case.
Prenups, financial transparency, and power dynamics. Guests like Katie Post share what to include, what to avoid, and how to start the conversation before things go off the rails.
That’s our recipe: expert interviews + practical tools + humor that keeps you breathing. Episodes are short enough for a dog walk but deep enough to change your next decision.
Who You’ll Hear
We curate guests who’ve sat in every chair—lawyers, therapists, digital forensics pros, financial planners, safety advocates, and survivors who turned their mess into a roadmap.
Bill Eddy (High Conflict Institute): BIFF and EAR techniques, parallel parenting, and communication guardrails.
Steven Bradley (former FBI “Tech Cowboy”): Digital breadcrumbs, evidence handling, and how AI can backfire in divorce.
Dr. Nadine Macaluso (therapist, trauma specialist): Love-bombing, trauma bonds, and healing after divorce.
Joanna Strober (Midi Health): Resilience, perimenopause, career pivots, and financial autonomy.
Core Topics
Divorce Strategy & Family Law: prenups, mediation vs. litigation, custody agreements, relocation, settlement strategy.
High-Conflict & Safety: coercive control, gaslighting, DARVO, BIFF vs. gray-rocking, protective orders, tech hygiene.
Co-Parenting & Parallel Parenting: calendars, school/holiday schedules, and communication protocols.
Money & Power: financial disclosure, tracing assets, budgeting, and managing fees.
Mindset & Mental Health: compartmentalizing, trigger management, boundary scripts, and choosing the right therapist or coach.
Our show is both resourceful and entertaining. You’ll laugh, take notes, and walk away feeling less alone. With 160+ episodes and weekly updates, How Not to Suck at Divorce has become a trusted resource worldwide.
Whether you’re in the middle of a divorce, just considering it, or rebuilding afterward, this podcast helps you breathe easier, protect your sanity, and avoid the mistakes that cost people the most.
You’ll get through this. We promise. You’ve got this… and we’ve got you.
Episodes
Mentioned books
Jul 15, 2024 • 43min
118. Is Your Marriage Worth Saving??
Dr. Bill Doherty, founder of discernment counseling, discusses when to save a marriage. Topics include discernment counseling, differences from couples therapy, and transitioning to couple's therapy. Dr. Doherty also shares his favorite wine and the importance of valuable knowledge in relationships.
Jul 5, 2024 • 44min
117. How Do You Know When Your Marriage is Over? (special re air)
How do you know when your marriage is over? How do you know if it's just a phase or if something that was once there will never really come back? Did you "try hard enough" to "save your marraige" and what does that even mean??? At what point can you confident that divorce is the right decision for you??? What we have learned in our professional careers as a family law attorney and hosting this podcast is that sometimes hearing other people's stories help you relate more to your own. So today, we are re airing an episode from the second season of our show which features someone's personal story about when they knew their marriage was offically over. **** And if you're ready to begin the divorce process, you NEED the DCC! It's our one of a kind, Divorce Crash Course. This course literally holds your hand through all of your major decisions. You'll avoid MAJOR mistakes and save up to THOUSANDS of dollars because you're getting advice from one the most sought after divorce attorneys in the country!! For $97, this course will change your life. And we mean that. Check it out here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course We welcome guest and retired husband, Mike Draper, to the show as he shares his story of when he knew it was over and what life after divorce is really like for a single dad. Check out Magic Mike, (I'm sorry), I mean Mortgage Mike on IG @mortgage_mike As always we're keeping it real and keeping the levity because this process is tough enough. But you are never alone. You got this and we got you. *** If you need support with coparenting- or maybe you just want some extra insight into what coparenting will look for you- look no further than Our Family Wizard. You can get specialized information that WE created with OFW just for our listeners here: http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck And don't worry, we are back with fresh episodes in just a few weeks!!
Jun 29, 2024 • 56min
116. I Was Married to the Wolf of Wall Street (How to Run Like Hell) with Dr Nadine Macalusco
If you haven't been living under a rock, you saw the movie: The Wolf of Wall Street. Now you're going to hear about the real life experience of being married to infamous character in which the movie was written about. So what was it like being married to the Wolf of Wall Street?? Wel, their eight-year marriage began as a fairytale, filled with romantic dinners, expensive gifts, and lavish parties. But once they were bonded, Jordan’s ‘mask’ began to slip and acts of infidelity, narcissistic abuse, insatiable greed, and uncontrollable drug addiction became Nadine’s living nightmare. Nadine naively believed that their connection was real, and that her love could save him, so she remained trauma-bonded until the pain of their relationship became too much to bear. It would be decades before she realized her story resembled thousands of other women’s relational experiences. At the age of 30, Dr Nadine, or Dr Nae as she's often referred, packed up her curtains and kids and relocated to Los Angeles. She began a transformative process of intensive therapy and deep self-reflection, which required facing her pain, admitting, and owning her mistakes, and reconnecting with the authentic self she’d lost due to Jordan’s abuse. Through her own healing, a passion for helping others was born. She returned to school at 39 to become a psychotherapist, and ten years later, graduated with a PhD in Counseling and Somatic Psychology. You’re also going to hear find out the hell can you do so that you're not carrying around this weight and this storm cloud for the rest of your life. To learn more about how YOU can work directly with Dr Nae (and we know you want to), check her out here: https://drnae.com/about-dr-nadine-macaluso/# AND, grab her book, Run Like Hell here: https://drnae.com/run-like-hell-book/ So tune in as we chat with Dr. Nadine Macaluso, a clinical expert and ex-wife of the real-life Wolf of Wall Street, Jordan Belfort. If you're in need of coparenting support- look no further than Our Family Wizard. We LOVE them. Head here for more information: http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck And finally, if Dr Nae's story sound at all like yours...you NEED the Divorce Crash Course, get it here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course
Jun 21, 2024 • 32min
115. How to Get the Right Divorce Support
Okay, let’s face it- if you’re listening to this podcast you know that (& if you’re a new listener you will soon find out) community, and support during divorce, is SO IMPORTANT. When you can't decide whether you need to scream in your car/bathroom/ or random aisle at Target, you need to know who you can turn to who will comfort you, make you laugh, and remind you that this horrible phase that you're in will not be your forever. Today on the show we’re talking to our good friend, and dad of three: Rob Roseman. Rob is also the founder of WTF Divorce. We adore Rob and on this episode he shares his journey of realizing the significance of finding support through online communities after going through a divorce of his own. In this episode, we talk: -Challenges of isolation -Benefits of relatable humor -Critical advice for engaging with credentialed professionals -Rob's book "WTF Divorce" and all of the joy it can bring to your life!! Check out the book here: amazon link! Follow Rob on IG- 139K already do!! http://www.instagram.com/wtfdivorce Listen to this episode to learn how community helps make a difficult process more bearable and even bring some much-needed laughter into your life! If you're starting your divorce process, you NEED the DCC, check that out here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course Our Family Wizard is here to help you with your coparenting journey! Visit our special landing page for them to learn more about why are one of the MUST HAVES for your divorce. http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck
Jun 14, 2024 • 59min
114. What You Must Do Before You Leave Your Abusive Marriage...
We know - it sounds pretty daunting and impossible. This episode is full of actionable steps for you to take. In this episode, we chat again with forensic psychotherapist guest, Micaela Van Dine https://mvdpsychotherapy.com/, about how to prepare to leave your abusive marriage. You're going to hear about: -Setting a timeline for leaving (we know- sounds impossible) -Understanding your/your spouse's financial situation -Securing sentimental belongings -Safely exiting the marriage -Making sure you're doing things "by the law" in your state -Be SUPER mindful of the kids Our Divorce Crash Course was help you out here- BIG TIME- please, go check it out. It's $97 and will give you an actionable plan that will help save THOUSANDS and avoid major mistakes. https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course Friends, you can reach out to Micaela directly on her website if you want her consulting advice. As always it’s recommended to consult with legal professionals and therapists specific to the listener's jurisdiction to ensure appropriate and personalized advice. If you need support in finding someone in your area, shoot us over an email at hello@hownottosuckatdivorce.com Our Family Wizard is here to help you with your coparenting journey. http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck Soberlink is here for you if you're concerned about alcohol usage during parenting time. Go to: http://www.soberlink.com/notsuck to get $50 off your device.
Jun 8, 2024 • 55min
113. High Conflict Divorce Survival Guide
This episode is your high conflict divorce survival guide. We are going to cover the steps you should take to help maintain your sanity and stamina needed to survive high conflict divorce process. On this episode, we talk with forensic psychotherapist, Micaela Van Dine, https://mvdpsychotherapy.com , who shares her professional insights and personal experiences related to high-conflict divorces in the courtroom. Do you have our Divorce Crash Course?? If you are navigating a high conflict divorce, this crash course will potentially help you save THOUSANDS of dollars. Find it here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course As ALWAYS, this episode offers several action steps and practical advice, like: -Maintaining silence amid provocation -Building a support system -Choosing the right legal and mental health professionals to guide you through the difficult process One of the most helpful tools available to you is Our Family Wizard. Used in many high conflict cases, Our Family Wizard is our top recommendation for organizing communication between coparents. http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck And don't forget about Soberlink! Soberlink to our go-to tool for those who suspect an alcohol issue during parenting times. Visit: http://www.soberlink.com/not to receive $50 off your device. Hit play & feel a little less alone! Please reach out to us should you want more support!
May 25, 2024 • 25min
112. Mediation Prep That Will be Crucial to Your Case
Listen to this episode BEFORE you go into mediation. It IS possible to have a positive outcome from mediation, even if you feel like your soon to be ex spouse agree on NOTHING. And before we get into the nitty gritty: Do you have our Divorce Crash Course? It literally holds your hand through ALL major divorce decisions! Get it here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course Here are 3 EXPERT tips, (from a mediator herself- Joy Rosenthal-https://www.joyrosenthal.com/), to help you reframe your mind before entering mediation: 1) You don't have to RESPECT your soon to be ex, but you still need to have some DIGNITY for them. In other words, treat them like a human who also has wants and needs (even if their wants and needs are questionable and they're acting like a total tool) 2)Start to think of the problem as something that's outside of you and your soon to be ex. Meaning, the issue is "who gets the kids this Christmas?" or "who gets the lake house?" or "who's going to get the collection of ketchup bottles?" (yes, that was an actual issue for one of Morgan's cases). The issue is not about YOU, and it's not about you soon to be ex, it's simply a "problem" that needs to be "solved". 3)Think about why you want what you say you want. This one is kinda about checking ego, and also just gaining some perspective on the situation. It's important to keep in mind that everyone loses something in a divorce. You're not gonna come of this thing with EVERYTHING you want, it just doesn't work like that. In fact, the old divorce joke goes, "if both parties are unhappy and feel they got cheated, then the attorneys did their job" I (Andrea) HATE that joke and it makes me want to scream, but that's the way it goes! And remember, mediation, divorce- all of this mess-is just going to be ONE event that happened in your life. It's not your life, you have a lot more life to live when this is all behind you. Our Family Wizard is here to help you though your coparenting journey. Learn more about them here: http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck
May 18, 2024 • 36min
111. What to Consider About the Summer (Divorce Tips!)
Summer’s almost here folks, and you know what that means...camps, vacations..and your divorce, oh my! Not to mention: the DREADED parenting agreements. One of Andrea’s least favorite topics but something we HAVE to talk about. We talk about the significance of communication and flexibility in establishing summer parenting schedules, and the legal implications of these changes. We also dive into the complexities of co-parenting during summer, including summer camps, child support, and travel logistics. In this episode you’ll learn: *The challenges of balancing work and children's needs during the summer, especially for working and single parents *Suggestions for getting help with childcare during the summer *The importance of creativity and flexibility *Examples of creative modifications to summer parenting schedules and the importance of communication between parents *Practical approaches to managing summer activities, like summer camps, co-parenting logistics, and managing expectation *Strategies for initiating conversations with co-parents about travel plans and managing summer camp choices. And friend that barely scratches this surface in this jam packed mini episode! Don't forget to check out the DCC, honey, you need this! : https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course And, go sign up for Our Family Wizard's free newsletter! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck And finally, join our private community! http://www.facebook.com/thehownottosuckatdivorcecommunity
May 14, 2024 • 57min
110: The Parenting Agreement (Biggest Divorce Mistakes) With Dr Malissa Tigges - special re air
Alright, here's one of Andrea's least favorite topics...but probably the most important: the parenting agreement. Below are the show notes for a special re air episode, all about the parenitng agreement. Remember, our Divorce Crash Course holds your hand through ALL of the important decisions you make during your divorce process. Grab you DCC, right here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course for only $97, you can save up to THOUSANDS and avoid making MAJOR mistakes. The cost of our crash course includes 5 short videos, which are wildly informative and entertaining (if we do say so ourselves) AND includes a printable guidebook, that has mental health break exercises built in! *********** We're getting into some real, REAL stuff in this episode. This is one of the biggest concerns our listeners have so we wanted to dedicate an entire episode to how to put your kids first in your parenting agreement. Today, we have therapist Dr. Malissa Tigges with us to talk about how to create a parenting agreement that prioritizes the welfare of your kids. Dr. Tigges is a licensed clinical and forensics psychologist with over 10 years of experience working as a psychotherapist and an evaluator. She helps people make the best decisions possible when developing their parenting agreements. Dr. Tigges, Morgan and Andrea answer: What do divorcing couples need to understand when putting together their parenting agreement? How to design the parenting agreement so it's appropriate at each age of the children. The biggest mistake divorcing couples make when creating their parenting agreement. What is the main difference of a parenting plan that involves a younger child vs. a teenager? Can you modify a parenting agreement? Who should you consult with to ensure your parenting agreement is the best for your child? Should you open the parenting agreement email after having a few drinks? What is co-parenting therapy and is it necessary? What do you do when your rights are being violated during the divorce process when you're drafting the parenting agreement? What's the best schedule for co-parenting? 50/50? Week on, week off? Every other weekend? The answer may upset you, but it's important to understand. Is there wiggle room in a parenting agreement if there's a special trip or long weekend planned? Dr. Tigges also shares her absolute "must-dos". Here is where you can connect with Dr. Tigges: @drmalissatigges on instagram, tiktok and facebook Dr. Tigges is licensed in Florida but if you're not in Florida, your state may allow you to do telehealth with Dr. Tigges so if you need guidance, reach out! Also- Our Family Wizard is here to help make your coparenting journey a whole lot easier. To learn more about them and to get access to an article that we cowrote, visit them at: http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck
May 3, 2024 • 40min
109. Can You Record Your Ex?? (Divorce Questions)
Today’s episode is about something we get asked about A LOT - recording your ex. The truth of the matter is there are some major things you MUST think about before hitting that record button, and yes, EVEN if your attorney suggests it. However, there is a time & a place for capturing what you need to help your divorce proceeding. We answer: What legally admissible means and how it applies to you When we would recommend you recording your ex What does it mean in your state? Is it legal? And what does it mean? When would it be appropriate to record and when would it not be? And, why we LOVE Ring doorbells (not sponsored...yet..hit us up, Ring!) This episode is not only insightful but a resource for you that you may need at some point & we want to equip you with the information you need. And remember, Our Family Wizard is here to help you with your coparenting journey. To learn more about Our Family Wizard, please go check them out, you'll also get access to a special (and funny) article we co wrote with them!! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck Do you have the Divorce Crash Course??? It's going to help you- BIG TIME. https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course You've got this, friends, and we've got you!
