This episode is your high conflict divorce survival guide. We are going to cover the steps you should take to help maintain your sanity and stamina needed to survive high conflict divorce process. On this episode, we talk with forensic psychotherapist, Micaela Van Dine, https://mvdpsychotherapy.com , who shares her professional insights and personal experiences related to high-conflict divorces in the courtroom. Do you have our Divorce Crash Course?? If you are navigating a high conflict divorce, this crash course will potentially help you save THOUSANDS of dollars.  Find it here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course As ALWAYS, this episode offers several action steps and practical advice, like: -Maintaining silence amid provocation -Building a support system -Choosing the right legal and mental health professionals to guide you through the difficult process   One of the most helpful tools available to you is Our Family Wizard. Used in many high conflict cases, Our Family Wizard is our top recommendation for organizing communication between coparents. http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck And don't forget about Soberlink! Soberlink to our go-to tool for those who suspect an alcohol issue during parenting times. Visit: http://www.soberlink.com/not to receive $50 off your device. Hit play & feel a little less alone! Please reach out to us should you want more support!

Listen to this episode BEFORE you go into mediation.  It IS possible to have a positive outcome from mediation, even if you feel like your soon to be ex spouse agree on NOTHING. And before we get into the nitty gritty: Do you have our Divorce Crash Course? It literally holds your hand through ALL major divorce decisions! Get it here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course  Here are 3 EXPERT tips, (from a mediator herself- Joy Rosenthal-https://www.joyrosenthal.com/), to help you reframe your mind before entering mediation: 1) You don't have to RESPECT your soon to be ex, but you still need to have some DIGNITY for them. In other words, treat them like a human who also has wants and needs (even if their wants and needs are questionable and they're acting like a total tool) 2)Start to think of the problem as something that's outside of you and your soon to be ex. Meaning, the issue is "who gets the kids this Christmas?" or "who gets the lake house?" or "who's going to get the collection of ketchup bottles?" (yes, that was an actual issue for one of Morgan's cases). The issue is not about YOU, and it's not about you soon to be ex, it's simply a "problem" that needs to be "solved". 3)Think about why you want what you say you want. This one is kinda about checking ego, and also just gaining some perspective on the situation.  It's important to keep in mind that everyone loses something in a divorce. You're not gonna come of this thing with EVERYTHING you want, it just doesn't work like that.  In fact, the old divorce joke goes, "if both parties are unhappy and feel they got cheated, then the attorneys did their job" I (Andrea) HATE that joke and it makes me want to scream, but that's the way it goes! And remember, mediation, divorce- all of this mess-is just going to be ONE event that happened in your life. It's not your life, you have a lot more life to live when this is all behind you.  Our Family Wizard is here to help you though your coparenting journey. Learn more about them here: http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck

Summer’s almost here folks, and you know what that means...camps, vacations..and your divorce, oh my! Not to mention: the DREADED parenting agreements. One of Andrea’s least favorite topics but something we HAVE to talk about. We talk about the significance of communication and flexibility in establishing summer parenting schedules, and the legal implications of these changes. We also dive into the complexities of co-parenting during summer, including summer camps, child support, and travel logistics.  In this episode you’ll learn:  *The challenges of balancing work and children's needs during the summer, especially for working and single parents *Suggestions for getting help with childcare during the summer *The importance of creativity and flexibility *Examples of creative modifications to summer parenting schedules and the importance of communication between parents *Practical approaches to managing summer activities, like summer camps, co-parenting logistics, and managing expectation *Strategies for initiating conversations with co-parents about travel plans and managing summer camp choices. And friend that barely scratches this surface in this jam packed mini episode! Don't forget to check out the DCC, honey, you need this! : https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course And, go sign up for Our Family Wizard's free newsletter! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck And finally, join our private community! http://www.facebook.com/thehownottosuckatdivorcecommunity

Alright, here's one of Andrea's least favorite topics...but probably the most important: the parenting agreement. Below are the show notes for a special re air episode, all about the parenitng agreement.    Remember, our Divorce Crash Course holds your hand through ALL of the important decisions you make during your divorce process. Grab you DCC, right here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course for only $97, you can save up to THOUSANDS and avoid making MAJOR mistakes. The cost of our crash course includes 5 short videos, which are wildly informative and entertaining (if we do say so ourselves) AND includes a printable guidebook, that has mental health break exercises built in! ***********   We're getting into some real, REAL stuff in this episode. This is one of the biggest concerns our listeners have so we wanted to dedicate an entire episode to how to put your kids first in your parenting agreement. Today, we have therapist Dr. Malissa Tigges with us to talk about how to create a parenting agreement that prioritizes the welfare of your kids. Dr. Tigges is a licensed clinical and forensics psychologist with over 10 years of experience working as a psychotherapist and an evaluator. She helps people make the best decisions possible when developing their parenting agreements. Dr. Tigges, Morgan and Andrea answer: What do divorcing couples need to understand when putting together their parenting agreement? How to design the parenting agreement so it's appropriate at each age of the children. The biggest mistake divorcing couples make when creating their parenting agreement. What is the main difference of a parenting plan that involves a younger child vs. a teenager? Can you modify a parenting agreement? Who should you consult with to ensure your parenting agreement is the best for your child? Should you open the parenting agreement email after having a few drinks? What is co-parenting therapy and is it necessary? What do you do when your rights are being violated during the divorce process when you're drafting the parenting agreement? What's the best schedule for co-parenting? 50/50? Week on, week off? Every other weekend? The answer may upset you, but it's important to understand. Is there wiggle room in a parenting agreement if there's a special trip or long weekend planned? Dr. Tigges also shares her absolute "must-dos". Here is where you can connect with Dr. Tigges: @drmalissatigges on instagram, tiktok and facebook Dr. Tigges is licensed in Florida but if you're not in Florida, your state may allow you to do telehealth with Dr. Tigges so if you need guidance, reach out! Also- Our Family Wizard is here to help make your coparenting journey a whole lot easier. To learn more about them and to get access to an article that we cowrote, visit them at: http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck

Today’s episode is about something we get asked about A LOT - recording your ex. The truth of the matter is there are some major things you MUST think about before hitting that record button, and yes, EVEN if your attorney suggests it. However, there is a time & a place for capturing what you need to help your divorce proceeding.  We answer:  What legally admissible means and how it applies to you When we would recommend you recording your ex What does it mean in your state? Is it legal? And what does it mean? When would it be appropriate to record and when would it not be? And, why we LOVE Ring doorbells (not sponsored...yet..hit us up, Ring!) This episode is not only insightful but a resource for you that you may need at some point & we want to equip you with the information you need. And remember, Our Family Wizard is here to help you with your coparenting journey. To learn more about Our Family Wizard, please go check them out, you'll also get access to a special (and funny) article we co wrote with them!! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck Do you have the Divorce Crash Course??? It's going to help you- BIG TIME. https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course You've got this, friends, and we've got you!

Friend, let’s be real, we know that you're tired of pretending that everything is okay. We know that your gut is telling you that your marriage is not going to work. So, now what??? If you have EVER wondered: "What do I do if I think I want a divorce?" - this episode is for you.  If you're considering divorce but don't know where to begin, this episode is for you.  If you're just miserable in your marriage, but feel stuck, this episode is for you.  Don't forget: The DCC is here to help you save up to THOUSANDS on your divorce AND help you avoid making MAJOR mistakes. Get The Divorce Crash Course HERE! Join our private community: Here! And remember, Our Family Wizard is here to help you make coparenting easier. Believe us, you want to check them out: http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck This podcast was designed to give you information, entertainment and empathy as you embark on the divorce process.  We know that divorce is hard. We know that it's a long and draining process. We also know that life is so much better on the other side.  Don't give up. Everyone deserves to be happy.  You've got this and we've got you.    

With divorce, there are things that you might feel you have zero control over, right?  Maybe you’ve thought before, “My attorney's not fighting me.”  OR maybe you're frustrated that your attorney's bills are insanely high and you wish there was SOMETHING you could do so save money. Friend: I hope you listen to this episode with an open mind because we are going to give you very concrete steps that you can take to help your attorney help YOU so that you can make the most out of your attorney. And, if you haven't grabbed our DCC yet, go get it here. DCC = Divorce Crash Course Divorce Crash Course In today’s episode, we cover-  -Saving money -Getting your attorney to fight for you  -Supplying your attorney with the necessary information to really get the best outcome for your case -Why it’s important to pay your bill on time -Why it’s important to stick to the FACTS and leave your emotions out of it  -A clear example of what it looks like to HELP your attorney HELP you  Andrea asks some JUICY questions to Morgan, that you don’t want to miss! And remember, Soberlink is here to help you if you're concerned about a coparent's alcohol use. Save $50 off your device and learn more here: https://www.soberlink.com/notsuck Join our private community, we'd love to have! http://www.facebook.com/thehownottosuckatdivorcecommunity

In today’s episode, boooooy did we shed some light on the top asked questions when navigating a divorce. From the quirky laws about eavesdropping, (did you know in Illinois recording someone on the phone without consent is a no-go but in public, it’s fair game?), to seeking multiple opinions like you would for a tricky medical condition – this episode has it all.  And here's your place to grab access to the DCC: The Divorce Crash Course, yes, you need this! :The Divorce Crash Course  And hey, for those wondering about GALs and child representatives in custody battles, we've got the lowdown right here. In this episode we answer:  HOW to tell your spouse you want a divorce (and the big reason why we suggest NOT doing it on a weekend) What to do when you feel like your spouse has been hiding finances and is it worth it to continue digging?  Trial separations before filing! Doing the right thing or putting off the inevitable?  GAL - what it is and the role that it serves  How do you know if a GAL is going to help or hurt your case? When do you advocate that you want one? Do you say “I want one”, or is it something that you wait for a judge to slap on to your case?  Difference between GAL child rep - How would you know when you need one and not the other? Who does a GAL speak to and who does a GAL not speak to? And is a GAL the same thing as a custody evaluator? Are they going to come into my home and see what my home looks like?  What does parental alienation actually mean?  What happens if your ex records your conversations? Are they allowed to do this? How late is too late is too switch attorneys?  Experience requesting an order from the judge  I promise we’re in your corner and here for you and remember, you’ve got this and we’ve got you! **And remember, if alcohol use is a concern with safe parenting time, then Soberlink is a tool you need in your toolbox. Learn more and save $50 off your device here: https://www.soberlink.com/notsuck *** To join our private community, head here: The How Not to Suck at Divorce Community

Oooooh friend - today you are in for an absolute TREAT. We (Andrea & Morgan) uncover the 5 BIGGEST MISTAKES that we see happening when it comes to getting divorced. AND, to put the cherry on top, you can get even more access to these topics and so much more "hands on help" with: The Divorce Crash Course.  Literally - this will be your divorce playbook. You want this crash course, you need this crash course. And, like we said in the show, we priced this guide at a low pricepoint so it's accessable to everyone. Most divorce "courses" are hundreds of dollars and take HOURS to complete. Our crash course is different.  We also made sure that your privacy is protected. The credit card charge shows up as "DCC150", so nothing about divorce is mentioned.  There's also an Afterpay option, so you can pay in installments. And if you're on the fence about getting divorced: This course will help you.  Okay, here's the link: ➡️ https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-course ⬅️   In this episode, we cover some of the goods inside of the The Divorce Crash Course including: Hiring a divorce attorney Kids and the mistakes that people make when it comes to kids If you should sell your house Communication with your ex (Andrea’s personal fav)  How to NOT rush through signing those important documents ************* And if you're concered about your coparent's alcohol use, Soberlink can help: https://www.soberlink.com/notsuck. This link will give you more information and a coupon for $50 off your device.  And please join our private community for more support! http://www.facebook.com/thehownottosuckatdivorcecommunity

In today’s episode, we have a very first for this podcast & an incredibly special guest - Retired Los Angeles Judge Dianna Gould-Saltman. That’s right - a VERY recently retired divorce judge! (who BTW, has divorced several celebrity couples) Let's face it- nobody wants to go to court. It’s just not a fun experience. If you're navigating the divorce process, going before the judge is likely a step that you are trying to avoid for several reasons. But for one reason or another, it happens for a lot of divorcing couples.  So, what do you do you to get the judge "on your side"??? In this episode you’ll learn:  * An easy thing you can do to help yourself get in the right headspace for court  * What do to and not to do when you’re actually in front of the judge in court  * Does it matter if the judge *knows* the attorney who’s representing you or your spouse * What are some mistakes that Judge Dianna saw in her courtroom over and over  *What's a "private divorce"?? If you’re going through this nasty thing called divorce and ready to learn how to prepare for court in the eyes of a retired divorce judge…this epiosode is for YOU.  AND! If you're wanting to hire Judge Dianna Gould- Saltman as your mediator or your private judge...guess what? You can do that! Find her here: https://signatureresolution.com/neutral-CPT/hon-dianna-gould-saltman-ret/ And friends, if your case is going into court then you likely need some more emotional support. Look no futher than our private community. You can find it right here: http://www.facebook.com/thehownottosuckatdivorcecommunity ********** Do you know about Our Family Wizard?? Because if not, you really need to go sign up for their newsletter. Our Family Wizard makes coparenting A LOT easier by helping you organize your calenders, expenses, AND monitor communications : and best part, it's looked upon HIGHLY in the courts as a way to help families do divorce better. To learn more, go to: http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck