How Not To Suck At Divorce: Divorce Advice and Relatable Humor
Morgan Stogsdill and Andrea Rappaport
How Not to Suck at Divorce guides anyone who’s divorcing or even just considering divorce. Hosted by Morgan Stogsdill and Andrea Rappaport, the show delivers equal parts strategy, empathy, and humor.
Morgan Stogsdill is a powerhouse family law attorney and head of family law at the largest firm in the United States. She’s seen every curveball, knows the difference between drama and strategy, and helps clients avoid costly mistakes. Andrea Rappaport is a comedian, marketing pro, and divorced-then-happily-remarried mom who has made the exact painful mistakes we beg you not to repeat. Together, we’ve built a podcast that blends courtroom-level insight with compassionate, practical moves you can use the second the episode ends.
Our community is loyal, our guests are leaders, and our episodes are packed with value. In short: listening to How Not to Suck at Divorce will help you avoid major divorce mistakes.
We launched this show to fill the gap between “funny but fluffy” podcasts and “useful but soul-crushing” legal jargon. The goal: actionable empathy. With scripts, checklists, and boundaries ready, you’ll make fewer panic decisions and save money, time, and sanity.
What We Cover
Should I stay or should I go? Decision-making frameworks, acronyms, and step-by-step exercises for clarity.
Co-parenting and high-conflict personalities. We unpack narcissist dynamics, manipulation tactics, and non-reactive communication. (We even created a framework called “WTF” to help you remember it when your brain is on fire.)
The BIFF method and conflict de-escalation. With Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute, we translate his tools into real-world texts and emails you can send without blowing up your case.
Tech safety and AI mistakes. Steven Bradley, former FBI agent and digital safety expert (“Tech Cowboy”), explains how tech evidence, AI hallucinations, and smart device trails can help—or hurt—your case.
Prenups, financial transparency, and power dynamics. Guests like Katie Post share what to include, what to avoid, and how to start the conversation before things go off the rails.
That’s our recipe: expert interviews + practical tools + humor that keeps you breathing. Episodes are short enough for a dog walk but deep enough to change your next decision.
Who You’ll Hear
We curate guests who’ve sat in every chair—lawyers, therapists, digital forensics pros, financial planners, safety advocates, and survivors who turned their mess into a roadmap.
Bill Eddy (High Conflict Institute): BIFF and EAR techniques, parallel parenting, and communication guardrails.
Steven Bradley (former FBI “Tech Cowboy”): Digital breadcrumbs, evidence handling, and how AI can backfire in divorce.
Dr. Nadine Macaluso (therapist, trauma specialist): Love-bombing, trauma bonds, and healing after divorce.
Joanna Strober (Midi Health): Resilience, perimenopause, career pivots, and financial autonomy.
Core Topics
Divorce Strategy & Family Law: prenups, mediation vs. litigation, custody agreements, relocation, settlement strategy.
High-Conflict & Safety: coercive control, gaslighting, DARVO, BIFF vs. gray-rocking, protective orders, tech hygiene.
Co-Parenting & Parallel Parenting: calendars, school/holiday schedules, and communication protocols.
Money & Power: financial disclosure, tracing assets, budgeting, and managing fees.
Mindset & Mental Health: compartmentalizing, trigger management, boundary scripts, and choosing the right therapist or coach.
Our show is both resourceful and entertaining. You’ll laugh, take notes, and walk away feeling less alone. With 160+ episodes and weekly updates, How Not to Suck at Divorce has become a trusted resource worldwide.
Whether you’re in the middle of a divorce, just considering it, or rebuilding afterward, this podcast helps you breathe easier, protect your sanity, and avoid the mistakes that cost people the most.
You’ll get through this. We promise. You’ve got this… and we’ve got you.
Morgan Stogsdill is a powerhouse family law attorney and head of family law at the largest firm in the United States. She’s seen every curveball, knows the difference between drama and strategy, and helps clients avoid costly mistakes. Andrea Rappaport is a comedian, marketing pro, and divorced-then-happily-remarried mom who has made the exact painful mistakes we beg you not to repeat. Together, we’ve built a podcast that blends courtroom-level insight with compassionate, practical moves you can use the second the episode ends.
Our community is loyal, our guests are leaders, and our episodes are packed with value. In short: listening to How Not to Suck at Divorce will help you avoid major divorce mistakes.
We launched this show to fill the gap between “funny but fluffy” podcasts and “useful but soul-crushing” legal jargon. The goal: actionable empathy. With scripts, checklists, and boundaries ready, you’ll make fewer panic decisions and save money, time, and sanity.
What We Cover
Should I stay or should I go? Decision-making frameworks, acronyms, and step-by-step exercises for clarity.
Co-parenting and high-conflict personalities. We unpack narcissist dynamics, manipulation tactics, and non-reactive communication. (We even created a framework called “WTF” to help you remember it when your brain is on fire.)
The BIFF method and conflict de-escalation. With Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute, we translate his tools into real-world texts and emails you can send without blowing up your case.
Tech safety and AI mistakes. Steven Bradley, former FBI agent and digital safety expert (“Tech Cowboy”), explains how tech evidence, AI hallucinations, and smart device trails can help—or hurt—your case.
Prenups, financial transparency, and power dynamics. Guests like Katie Post share what to include, what to avoid, and how to start the conversation before things go off the rails.
That’s our recipe: expert interviews + practical tools + humor that keeps you breathing. Episodes are short enough for a dog walk but deep enough to change your next decision.
Who You’ll Hear
We curate guests who’ve sat in every chair—lawyers, therapists, digital forensics pros, financial planners, safety advocates, and survivors who turned their mess into a roadmap.
Bill Eddy (High Conflict Institute): BIFF and EAR techniques, parallel parenting, and communication guardrails.
Steven Bradley (former FBI “Tech Cowboy”): Digital breadcrumbs, evidence handling, and how AI can backfire in divorce.
Dr. Nadine Macaluso (therapist, trauma specialist): Love-bombing, trauma bonds, and healing after divorce.
Joanna Strober (Midi Health): Resilience, perimenopause, career pivots, and financial autonomy.
Core Topics
Divorce Strategy & Family Law: prenups, mediation vs. litigation, custody agreements, relocation, settlement strategy.
High-Conflict & Safety: coercive control, gaslighting, DARVO, BIFF vs. gray-rocking, protective orders, tech hygiene.
Co-Parenting & Parallel Parenting: calendars, school/holiday schedules, and communication protocols.
Money & Power: financial disclosure, tracing assets, budgeting, and managing fees.
Mindset & Mental Health: compartmentalizing, trigger management, boundary scripts, and choosing the right therapist or coach.
Our show is both resourceful and entertaining. You’ll laugh, take notes, and walk away feeling less alone. With 160+ episodes and weekly updates, How Not to Suck at Divorce has become a trusted resource worldwide.
Whether you’re in the middle of a divorce, just considering it, or rebuilding afterward, this podcast helps you breathe easier, protect your sanity, and avoid the mistakes that cost people the most.
You’ll get through this. We promise. You’ve got this… and we’ve got you.
Episodes
Mentioned books
Sep 5, 2025 • 38min
167. Surviving Divorce in a no-fault State: Affairs, Finances, and Parenting Time
When an affair is part of your divorce story, it can feel like there’s no justice...especially in a no-fault state. In this candid, funny-but-serious conversation, Andrea and Morgan break down what you can control: your money, your mindset, and your parenting decisions. They explain how dissipation (spending marital funds on a third party) might matter, when it’s worth digging into records, what to ask your lawyer, and why protecting your mental health (and your kids) is the real win. You’ll also hear how new partners or messy situations (hello, “au pair drama”) can affect parenting time and how to keep your own behavior from hurting your case.What You’ll Learn:What a no-fault divorce actually means for affairsHow spending money on someone else can affect your caseA simple way to ask your lawyer about looking into dissipation without overspendingWhy protecting your mental health matters more than “justice”How new partners or messy situations can impact parenting timeOur Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Aug 29, 2025 • 46min
167. Should You Get Divorced or Stay In Your Marriage? (at least for now)
When you’re stuck wondering if you should stay married or finally move forward with a divorce, the decision feels impossible. In this episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, Andrea and Morgan get real about how to weigh your options—emotionally and practically—so you can stop spinning in circles and start finding clarity.They share a powerful acronym to help you evaluate your marriage, plus the exact logistical steps you should take if divorce might be on your horizon. From emotional check-ins to financial prep, you’ll walk away knowing what questions to ask and what to do next.Questions answered in this episode:How do you know if it’s really your marriage—or just outside stress—making you unhappy?What is the TALK acronym and how can it help you evaluate your relationship?Why is therapy (with a professional, not a friend) a critical first step?What does “attunement” actually mean in a marriage, and why does it matter?How can laughter and levity show you the health of your relationship?Why do you need to understand the divorce process before making a decision?What financial steps should you take if you’re not sure whether to divorce?How does timing (holidays, business cycles, even illness) affect the right moment to file?What should you know about custody laws in your state before deciding?How do you know if you’re mentally strong enough to start the divorce process?Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Aug 22, 2025 • 49min
166. Navigating School Politics, Communication, and Mom Drama for Divorcing/Divorced Parents
Let’s face it—back to school hits different when you’re divorced… and especially when you’re the one stuck writing 40 thank-you notes from a six-year-old who can barely write his name.In this episode, Andrea and Morgan are tackling two of the most unhinged yet relatable parenting hurdles:🎁 Kid birthday party etiquette (aka the gift spiral from hell)📚 Back-to-school survival when you’re divorced or divorcingFrom the emotional whiplash of a toddler’s party gift pile to awkwardly dodging your ex at curriculum night, these two don’t hold back. Expect brutal honesty, hysterical hypotheticals (yes, hiring someone to write thank-you notes is discussed), and practical survival tips to help you navigate the school year without screaming “NOT WELL, B*TCH!” at the PTA meeting.What You’ll Learn (and Laugh About):Why Lego gifts are basically a hate crimeHow to communicate with teachers without throwing your ex under the school busWhat to do when your kids feel caught between two parents on the first day of schoolWhy sitting with your ex at a band concert might not be best (even if Celine Dion is involved)The right (and wrong) way to set expectations with schools and teachersTips for socializing as a newly single parent (yes, we see you hiding in your car after drop-off)Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Aug 15, 2025 • 53min
165. Crucial Action Steps When Divorcing an Abusive Partner (And a Story That Will Help You Understand Cohersive Control)
Andrea and Morgan talk with Laura Richards, host of That’s Where I’m At podcast, about navigating divorce when abuse is part of the marriage. Laura shares her story of leaving a relationship that looked perfect from the outside but was filled with covert control, manipulation, and emotional harm behind closed doors. Alongside Laura’s experience, Andrea and Morgan offer practical and legal guidance for protecting yourself during this challenging time.In this episode, you’ll learn:How to identify and safeguard important items, financial records, valuables, and sentimental possessions before they can be taken or hidden.The importance of creating a legally sound safety plan for yourself and your children, even if the abuse has never been physical.Why you should expect the early stages of divorce to be the most difficult, and how to prepare mentally and emotionally for that period.How control can shift during divorce and the subtle ways an ex may try to manipulate or intimidate you.Why having your own attorney matters, even if mediation feels amicable.The role of supportive communities, therapy, and trusted resources in rebuilding your confidence and moving forward.Connect with Laura:Website: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/Podcast: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/episodes/Instagram: @thatswhereimatpodcastOur Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Aug 8, 2025 • 44min
164. Pre Divorce Action Steps For Leaving An Abusive Marriage (And a Personal Story That Inspired a Blockbuster Movie)
Abuse doesn’t always leave visible scars. If you’re in a marriage where your every move is controlled; whether it’s how you spend money, where you go, or who you see, you may be experiencing abuse without realizing it.In this episode, we’re giving you the 3 critical steps to take before you leave an abusive marriage, straight from a divorce lawyer’s perspective. Then, you’ll hear a riveting, eye-opening conversation with Dr. Nadine Macaluso—therapist, trauma-bond expert, and former wife of Jordan Belfort, the infamous “Wolf of Wall Street.”Dr. Nadine shares:How coercive control and trauma bonds keep people trappedThe truth about love bombing, cognitive dissonance, and the cycle of abuseWhat really happened behind the Hollywood portrayal of her marriageHow she rebuilt her life, earned her doctorate, and now helps others break freeWhether your situation mirrors hers or not, the insight and strategies in this episode could save you time, money, and possibly your safety.Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Aug 1, 2025 • 46min
163. The Smartest Way to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce
Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck20Friends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Jul 25, 2025 • 27min
162. What the #1 Divorce Podcast Wants You to Know
In today's episode, Andrea sits down (sans Morgan! She's out of the country!) to drop some real talk about the hard truths of divorce that no one wants to hear...but everyone needs to. From AI misinformation to expensive attorney mistakes, high-conflict communication, and the emotional fallout of lost friendships, this episode delivers clarity and comfort for anyone navigating the messy middle of divorce.As always...Absolutely NO fluff. No filter. Just the truth. And a whole lot of support.What You’ll Learn:Why you should NEVER EVER use Chat GPT for divorce adviceHow to stop chasing “fair” and start playing smartWhat to ask your lawyer before litigation (and how to prep your mindset)Why calming your nervous system is the most powerful legal tool you haveHow to protect your wallet when communicating with your attorneyWhat to do when your friendships shift during your divorceMentioned Episodes:How to Prepare for a Divorce Battle with Mia PoppeAI, ChatGPT, and Divorce: What You Need to Know with Steven BradleyOur Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck20Friends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Jul 18, 2025 • 40min
161. How to Use Chat GPT in Your Divorce and How NOT to Use it
AI might be your late-night bestie, but should it be your divorce attorney? In this candid and insightful episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, Morgan and Andrea welcome back crowd-favorite and former FBI agent Steven Bradley aka the Tech Cowboy to bust myths, deliver tough truths, and provide essential clarity around using AI like ChatGPT during divorce. From legal hallucinations to cringeworthy court moments, this episode will change how you think about AI’s role in your case (and possibly your life). Tune in to learn how to use these tools wisely without risking your custody case, or your dignity.What You’ll Learn:Why ChatGPT is not designed for divorce or legal advice, and how it can backfireWhat “AI hallucinations” are and why they matter in courtHow Our Family Wizard’s ToneMeter AI actually protects youSimple rules for using AI safely (and legally) during divorceThe difference between closed AI and open AI and why it matters for your caseQuestions Answered in This Episode:Can ChatGPT really help you with your divorce?Why is it risky to input personal info into open AI tools?What’s the legal fallout of using AI-generated legal documents in court?How can co-parents use AI responsibly when emotions are high?Is there any safe way to get help from AI during divorce?Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Jul 11, 2025 • 57min
160. Preparing for Divorce/Custody Battle- What to Ask Your Attorney, How to Prep..
In this powerhouse episode, Andrea and Morgan welcome powerhouse attorney and metaphysical strategist Mia Poppe to help listeners emotionally and mentally prepare for the courtroom. Mia shares her toolkit for staying grounded during the most difficult moments of divorce—especially when “divorce psychosis” sets in. This raw, honest, and practical episode is packed with real-life strategies for surviving and thriving through litigation.What You’ll Learn:What “divorce psychosis” is and why it’s a temporary but very real stateHow to protect your peace when litigation gets nastyTactical steps to handle inflammatory messages from opposing counselWhy emotional intelligence matters more than money in courtHow meditation and mindset work can transform your case and your lifeOur Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuck20Friends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Connect with Mia Poppe:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miapoppe.esq/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/miapoppe/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@nylawsaWebsite: https://www.miapoppe.com/Join the free community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1399345284195177Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
Jul 4, 2025 • 49min
159. I Should Have Gotten Divorced Before I Got Married: An Inspirational Divorce Story
In this episode of How Not To Suck At Divorce, Heather McGinley, Emmy award-winning author and founder of The Happily Never After, shares her powerful story of growing up in a fundamentalist Christian family with 21 siblings and how her unconventional upbringing shaped her approach to relationships and divorce. She discusses the mistakes she made during her divorce process, including not interviewing multiple attorneys and failing to file for temporary support, while offering hope that life's most difficult endings can lead to beautiful new beginnings.What You'll HearHeather's shocking revelation about growing up as the eldest of many children in a "quiverfull" fundamentalist Christian household (hit play to find out HOW many siblings 👀)How religious trauma and purity culture affected her ability to form healthy relationshipsThe moment her therapist helped her realize she had shut down emotionally as a survival mechanismWhy she says she "should have gotten divorced before getting married"Her biggest mistakes during the divorce process, including financial decisions that cost her $20,000Her experience working as a producer on Oprah's show and the valuable lessons about intentionThe "bathroom floor" moments during divorce and how to get through themHow divorce became the catalyst for her personal growth and ability to love authenticallyQuestions Answered in This EpisodeHow does childhood trauma affect relationship choices in adulthood?What are the biggest mistakes people make when hiring a divorce attorney?When should you file for temporary spousal support during divorce proceedings?How do you know when it's time to get divorced?Why does divorce often get harder before it gets better?What should be on your divorce support team?How can you maintain hope during the darkest moments of divorce?What role does personal growth play in the divorce process?How do you move from surviving to thriving after divorce?Our Divorce Crash Course was designed to hold your hand through the process and help you avoid major and expensive mistakes. Learn more here: https://www.hownottosuckatdivorce.com/divorce-crash-courseOur Family Wizard is another fantasitc resource for those who need help navigating the "fun" world of coparenting. Head to this landing page to see how we work closely with them to support our listeners! http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/notsuckFriends, slide into our dms, we love love love hearing from you. We are always here to listen and help in any way we can. You've got this and we've got you.Instagram: @hownotosuckatdivorceFollow Andrea: @theandrearappaportFollow Morgan: @divorceattorneychicago
