Gay Men Going Deeper

Is your dating profile truly showing the best version of you? In this episode of Gay Men Going Deeper, we're diving into the do's and don'ts of crafting a profile that is aligned with what you’re truly looking for. On the apps, your profile is the first impression that counts so whether you're looking for love, fun, or meaningful connections, it matters.  Some topics we’ll discuss: What it means to show your authentic self without being cringy Choosing the best photos Crafting a bio that stands out. Common profile pitfalls How to be clear without being overly rigid  Balancing confidence with humility How we communicate on apps  Tune in for tips, insights, and takeaways to help you create a profile that attracts the right matches and reflects the real you. Join Michael's FREE one-time workshop where we'll give your dating profile a glow up: The Dating App Glow Up Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

In this episode, Matt speaks with men’s coach Shay Doran about the psychology and mindset of erectile dysfunction. Did you know that some research indicates that gay men experience a higher rate of erection problems compared to straight men? This episode unpacks the reasons gay men experience erection problems and how to overcome them. If you struggle with erection issues or performance anxiety and feel ashamed and alone, then this episode can help you feel less alone and see a way out of the suffering. The concepts and questions we explore in this episode are: How do erection challenges show up? What are the three main unique factors in how it shows up for gay men? How does sexual performance anxiety come into play? How does perfectionism play a role in ED?  The cycle of shame and secrecy caused by negative feedback loops How demisexuality plays a role in ED Exploring solutions to ED Related Links: Shay Performance Anxiety Quiz Matt Sexual Performance Anxiety and Erectile Dysfunction Research - Study published in the National Library of Medicine Research - Study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine Today's Guest: Shay Doran Website YouTube Instagram Today's Host: Matt Landsiedel Website Instagram TikTok Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Join us as we take a deep dive into the impact of dating apps on both our personal lives and the gay community at large. We get candid about how these apps have shaped our experience of dating and relating with other guys. From mindless swiping and ghosting to feeling used and disconnected, we explore the darker side of app culture while offering practical tips to create healthier, more positive experiences on dating apps. Tune in for discussions on: The personal toll of app addiction The good, the bad, and the ugly side of dating apps  How have the apps changed the gay community– for better or worse? Tips to maintain a positive relationship with dating apps. How to know when it’s time to take a break  Whether you're a fan of the apps or ready to delete them altogether, this episode will inspire you to reflect on how they fit into your love life and community connections. Mentioned in this Episode: 6 Signs It’s Time to Take a Break from Dating Apps Addiction & Recovery Part 1 Addiction & Recovery Part 2 Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Bottoming is more than just a position. It’s time to flip the script on the old, tired narrative that bottoms are the passive or submissive partners.  In this episode we’re celebrating all things bottom and introducing the concept of the Empowered Bottom—someone who owns their pleasure, sets boundaries, and takes charge of the experience, whether they’re submissive, bossy, or anywhere in between. We’ll be talking about: The difference between power bottoms and empowered bottoms (and other types of bottoms) Power, control, and who’s really in charge in bed Owning your pleasure without apology Bottom shaming Advocating for yourself Sexual health and feeling confident in your body  Join us for an episode that challenges sexual norms and subverts stereotypes within gay culture.  Related Link: Sexual Empowerment 101 Men’s Group (starting April 3) Today's Guest: Pepper Rojas Instagram Today's Host: Michael DiIorio Instagram Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

In this episode, we take a deep dive into the dynamics of monogamy in gay relationships. From unpacking the myths and stigmas surrounding monogamy to exploring the concept of devotion and intimacy, we’re challenging assumptions and offer fresh perspectives. Some of the things we discuss: The benefits of monogamy and why some gay couples choose it. What it takes to make monogamy work, and why that may be hard for some people Is there a stigma against monogamy in the gay community? How monogamous relationships help you grow What the research tells us about gay relationships and monogamy  Whether you’re in a monogamous relationship, considering one, or simply curious about the topic, tune in for a thoughtful discussion that blends personal stories, cultural observations, and practical advice for navigating gay relationships. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

In this episode, Matt speaks with therapist and author Tom Bruett about the struggles many gay men face with romantic relationships. Together they share decades of experience when it comes to understanding the relational challenges faced by gay men. From toxic shame to developmental trauma, they unpack what causes these challenges and how to start healing and empowering ourselves in our relationships.  If you are someone who struggles in your romantic relationships with intimacy, vulnerability or codependency, this episode was created with you in mind. This is an excellent episode if you're seeking guidance in relationship challenges, but it will also help you feel less alone in struggling with two of the most challenging things about being human; emotions and relationships.  The questions explored in this episode: Why do gay men struggle in relationships?  What is required for gay men to develop secure attachment? What is the difference between secure attachment and secure relationship?  What does a secure relationship look like?  What are the stages of queer relationship development? Related Link: The Secure Attachment Handbook Today's Guest: Tom Bruett Instagram Today's Host: Matt Landsiedel Facebook Instagram TikTok Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

What happens when friendship and intimacy collide? In this episode of Gay Men Going Deeper, we’re exploring the nuanced dynamics of friends with benefits (FWB) and friends with intimacy (FWI). But what happens when emotions sneak in, boundaries blur, or feelings start to change? We’ll discuss: Defining FWB vs. FWI: What they mean, how they’re different from dating or hookups, and what these relationships can look like. Boundaries: Essential skills like self-awareness, clear communication, and regular check-ins to keep things respectful and drama-free. The pros and cons: Why FWB might work for some and not for others, depending on emotional needs, communication skills, and personal priorities. As always, we’ll be sharing our personal experiences—yes, even the times it didn’t go as planned. Whether you're navigating an FWB situation or just curious about relational dynamics, this episode offers valuable insights to help you build connection structures that work for you. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

The first year after coming out can feel like an emotional rollercoaster—exciting, scary, and full of questions. How do you navigate this transformative time while finding your community, and embracing your authentic self? In this episode, we’re talking about the unique challenges and opportunities that come with living out for the first time. We’ll discuss: What was your first year out like? What are some common struggles newly out gay men face, and how can they overcome them? How do you figure out who you authentically are after hiding for so long? What’s your advice for building a supportive LGBTQ+ community? Whether you’re newly out, supporting someone who is, or reflecting on your own journey, this episode offers practical tools, heartfelt insights, and encouragement for thriving in this pivotal year. Free download: The Gay Man's Survival Guide For Your First Year Out Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

In this episode, Matt speaks with world-renowned trauma treatment expert, Harvard-trained psychiatrist, and psychotherapist Dr. Frank Anderson.  Let’s be honest, trauma isn't the most glamorous topic to talk about, but it significantly impacts us as gay men, and our community is in desperate need of healing from the trauma of growing up gay that we each likely experienced. This episode is a raw and real exploration of the impact growing up gay can have on us. Many of us had the pressure and stress of being a young boy and having to carry our big secret on our little shoulders. This pressure likely lasted for decades, and we had to deal with it alone, without support. Remember that you are not alone if you are struggling with this trauma or the dysfunctional behaviours unhealed trauma can cause us to engage in.  Matt and Frank created this episode as a guide to understanding your trauma and how to begin the healing process.  The concepts and questions we explore in this episode are: What are the different forms of trauma?  What causes the trauma of growing up gay? What is the traumatic impact of growing up gay? How does “parts work” or internal family systems therapy (IFS) heal trauma? What are some of the parts gay men have to develop to deal with growing up gay? How can we begin to work with our wounded and protector parts to start healing?  What's required for healing trauma for gay men specifically? What does life after trauma look like? How can we start to practice forgiveness and transcend our trauma? Related Link: MedCircle Interview Today's Guest: Dr. Frank Anderson Facebook Instagram TikTok Today's Host: Matt Landsiedel Facebook Instagram TikTok Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Living in the closet is a unique experience that queer people must face. Yet each person’s journey is shaped by culture, family dynamics, and social pressures. For some, living in the closet is about safety and survival. For others, it’s the first step in a journey toward self-acceptance and authenticity. In this episode, we explore what it’s really like to live in the closet and the complex emotions that come with it. We discuss: What was was like for you living in the closet? What did it take for you to come out? What advice would you give to someone who is in the closet but afraid to come out? Whether you’re still in the closet, reflecting on your journey, or supporting someone else through theirs, this conversation offers empathy, wisdom, and practical guidance for navigating this deeply personal experience. Tune in for an honest and heartfelt discussion about courage, culture, and living your truth—at your own pace. Free download: The Gay Man's Survival Guide For Your First Year Out Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.