Gay Men Going Deeper

Explore the addictive nature of dating apps and their emotional toll on users. Dive into the duality of these platforms, where superficial swipes clash with the desire for deeper connections. The hosts share personal stories and discuss the evolution from traditional gay spaces to app-driven interactions. They emphasize the need for emotional maturity while navigating these digital dating landscapes. Listeners will gain insights on maintaining a healthier relationship with dating apps and recognizing when it's time for a break.

In this engaging discussion, Pepper Rojas, a regular guest renowned for his candid take on gay culture, delves into the transformative concept of the Empowered Bottom. He unpacks the difference between power bottoms and empowered bottoms, advocating for self-advocacy and open communication about desires and boundaries. The conversation challenges bottom shaming and celebrates owning pleasure without apology. Listeners are invited to rethink sexual roles, embrace their identities confidently, and break free from societal norms around masculinity and intimacy.

The discussion swiftly challenges the stereotype that gay couples shy away from monogamy, presenting surprising stats on commitment. It dives into the reasons queer individuals often explore non-traditional relationship models. The hosts shed light on the benefits of monogamous relationships, emphasizing personal growth, intimacy, and the importance of open communication. They confront the stigma attached to monogamy within the queer community, advocating for personal choice in relationship dynamics, whatever their structure may be. Tune in for insightful stories and practical advice!

In this episode, Matt speaks with therapist and author Tom Bruett about the struggles many gay men face with romantic relationships. Together they share decades of experience when it comes to understanding the relational challenges faced by gay men. From toxic shame to developmental trauma, they unpack what causes these challenges and how to start healing and empowering ourselves in our relationships.  If you are someone who struggles in your romantic relationships with intimacy, vulnerability or codependency, this episode was created with you in mind. This is an excellent episode if you're seeking guidance in relationship challenges, but it will also help you feel less alone in struggling with two of the most challenging things about being human; emotions and relationships.  The questions explored in this episode: Why do gay men struggle in relationships?  What is required for gay men to develop secure attachment? What is the difference between secure attachment and secure relationship?  What does a secure relationship look like?  What are the stages of queer relationship development? Related Link: The Secure Attachment Handbook Today's Guest: Tom Bruett Instagram Today's Host: Matt Landsiedel Facebook Instagram TikTok Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.

What happens when friendship meets intimacy? Explore the intriguing dynamics of friends with benefits versus friends with intimacy. The conversation dives into setting boundaries and the importance of self-awareness. Discover the pros and cons of these relationships while listening to personal stories of what went right, and what went awry. Feelings can complicate casual arrangements, highlighting the need for clear communication and regular check-ins. Join the journey of navigating emotional connections in the context of modern friendships.

The first year after coming out can be a wild ride filled with excitement and challenges. The speakers share personal stories that illuminate the emotional highs and lows of embracing authenticity. They tackle the struggles of relationship changes and the importance of communication. There’s a focus on self-acceptance, setting boundaries, and how to build a supportive community. Listeners will find valuable resources that encourage patience and growth, making this journey of self-discovery a transformative experience.

In this episode, Matt speaks with world-renowned trauma treatment expert, Harvard-trained psychiatrist, and psychotherapist Dr. Frank Anderson.  Let’s be honest, trauma isn't the most glamorous topic to talk about, but it significantly impacts us as gay men, and our community is in desperate need of healing from the trauma of growing up gay that we each likely experienced. This episode is a raw and real exploration of the impact growing up gay can have on us. Many of us had the pressure and stress of being a young boy and having to carry our big secret on our little shoulders. This pressure likely lasted for decades, and we had to deal with it alone, without support. Remember that you are not alone if you are struggling with this trauma or the dysfunctional behaviours unhealed trauma can cause us to engage in.  Matt and Frank created this episode as a guide to understanding your trauma and how to begin the healing process.  The concepts and questions we explore in this episode are: What are the different forms of trauma?  What causes the trauma of growing up gay? What is the traumatic impact of growing up gay? How does “parts work” or internal family systems therapy (IFS) heal trauma? What are some of the parts gay men have to develop to deal with growing up gay? How can we begin to work with our wounded and protector parts to start healing?  What's required for healing trauma for gay men specifically? What does life after trauma look like? How can we start to practice forgiveness and transcend our trauma? Related Link: MedCircle Interview Today's Guest: Dr. Frank Anderson Facebook Instagram TikTok Today's Host: Matt Landsiedel Facebook Instagram TikTok Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at

Living in the closet is a unique experience that queer people must face. Yet each person’s journey is shaped by culture, family dynamics, and social pressures. For some, living in the closet is about safety and survival. For others, it’s the first step in a journey toward self-acceptance and authenticity. In this episode, we explore what it’s really like to live in the closet and the complex emotions that come with it. We discuss: What was was like for you living in the closet? What did it take for you to come out? What advice would you give to someone who is in the closet but afraid to come out? Whether you’re still in the closet, reflecting on your journey, or supporting someone else through theirs, this conversation offers empathy, wisdom, and practical guidance for navigating this deeply personal experience. Tune in for an honest and heartfelt discussion about courage, culture, and living your truth—at your own pace. Free download: The Gay Man's Survival Guide For Your First Year Out Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Coming out to our families can be one of the most difficult experiences we navigate as queer folk. Sometimes it can be made even more difficult if the people we are opening up to are challenged by it, or don’t understand it. Other times, we may find ourselves in the company of people who do understand, or simply meet our openness with their own. Or, in this case, sometimes what we experience is a combination of both. This is a unique episode, because today our co-host Reno is sitting down with none other than HIS MOM to have a conversation about being different, growing up gay and queer, how she navigated his queerness as a parent, and how they both navigated his queerness as parent and child. Allison Johnston is a mother, grandmother, social worker, advocate, and sage. In this episode, we dive into… When she knew I was different. When she knew I was gay. What some of the signs were. Life growing up. Coming out. How she and my family and friends experienced my coming out. Whether she struggled with it or not, and who did. What some of my own struggles were. What it was like being the mother of a queer child. What wisdom we might offer family members relating to queerness. Today's Guest: Allison Johnston Instagram Today's Host: Reno Johnston Instagram LinkedIn Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access

Big things are on the horizon for the Gay Men’s Brotherhood in 2025, and we can’t wait to share them with you! In this episode, we’re pulling back the curtain on our vision for the future— including new opportunities and exciting changes you can expect in the year ahead including: Opportunities for local meetup groups  New virtual events  In-person retreats Leadership opportunities  We’ll also talk about the ways you can step into the mission, make an impact, and help us shape the future of GMB. Whether you’ve been with us from the start or are just tuning in now, this is your moment to be part of something bigger. Your voice, your participation, and your unique contributions are what make this community thrive in 2025- and beyond. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.