Unapologetically Sensitive

Patricia Young
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Mar 22, 2020 • 32min

Bonus Episode 69 HSPs Are Needed Leaders, Healers and Connectors!

TITLE HSPs Are Needed Leaders, Healers and Connectors! GUEST Solo episode EPISODE OVERVIEW For the next few weeks (at least) I’m hosting FREE Zoom calls for members of the closed Facebook Groups Unapologetically Sensitive & Unapologetically Sensitive Therapist’s Group.  The world needs us right now, and we the ability to create connections and support, and we also need to ask for help.  This episode talks about some of the things HSPs are experiencing globally, and what we can do to create a sense of peace.  There are lots of great resources in the closed Facebook groups right now just for you!  HIGHLIGHTS Talking with people all over the world (Japan, Germany, UK, Canada, across the U.S.) Process deeply Don’t know if we’re coming or going Trying to absorb all the info Overwhelming/overstimulating One day you may be doing well, and the next you’re a hot mess We’re saying things we don’t mean We may have more conflict/tension We tend to like structure and knowing what to expect to some degree There is SO much uncertainty right now We may be experiencing empathy overload Even for people we don’t actually know Activating the wound of taking things too seriously or making a big deal out of things Acknowledge that we may have different points of views Acknowledge that there is no right or wrong (even if you think there is), and HONOR each person’s way of processing/dealing Honor OUR feelings! Adjusting Working from home Not having work Having kids home Having partners home Potential loss of income Reshifting priorities Concerns for aging parents, children, anyone who is medically vulnerable (could be yourself) Trying to figure out what social distancing will look like Having to set limits Guilty setting boundaries (even though we can be fierce advocates for others when things are unjust or unfair Tearful Activate narratives around being bossy, controlling, saying what others don’t, not doing enough Seniors Not taking precautions Saying if this is how they’re gonna go, then that’s fine This may be activating to those of us that are taking precautions to keep them safe Watch what we consume Where we get our news/information How much we consume/when we consume Cling to those that nourish our souls We do better when we’re surrounded by things that work Can we honor what’s coming up for us AND know that we are healers and often create a sense of peace and comfort for others (even if we’re fearful or anxious) Find ways to connect with other Share the good stuff Focus on gratitude Be of service Ask for help Use this as a time to slow down—it’s what we often say we need Get outdoors Move your body This is an opportunity to be mindful and consciously find ways to connect (people, creativity, beauty, nature, animals, etc.) PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more). LINKS Facebook Group Elaine Aron & High Sensitivity-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/ElaineAronHighSensitivity/ Marco Polo-- https://www.marcopolo.me/ Whatsapp-- https://www.whatsapp.com/ Voxer-- https://www.voxer.com/individuals Skype-- https://www.skype.com/en/ HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”   Website-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/ Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Closed/Private Facebook group for therapists—Unapologetically Sensitive Therapist’s Group-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/208565440423641/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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Mar 14, 2020 • 20min

Bonus Episode 68 5 Ways to Thrive As a Highly Sensitive Person During COVID-19

TITLE 5 Ways to Thrive As a Highly Sensitive Person During COVID-19 GUEST Solo episode EPISODE OVERVIEW Brene Brown said we can heal together during this time.  I talk about how the Highly Sensitive Person, aka HSP, may be impacted right now with COVID-19, but more importantly, I talk about ways we can thrive and really take care of ourselves during this time.  In spite of the big feels we may be having, we CAN make choices to help us feel connected and supported.  Let’s use our HSP Glue to come together and heal.  HIGHLIGHTS I am not an expert; nor am I a healthcare official—this is my opinion As Highly Sensitive People (HSPs), we most likely will be processing more than usual It may take more time to figure out how we are feeling about COVID-19 and all of the ramifications It can be difficult to live with so much uncertainty Empathy overload We may be feeling things in our bodies, or feel like we’re buzzing, but not know exactly what it is We may be more fearful, irritable, weepy, disconnect, using things for comfort (food, electronics, exercise, wine, online shopping etc.) Use lots of mindfulness and self-compassion We may want to go dark and disappear Please check in with yourself and see if that’s what you really need It’s easy to create a story in our heads about how what we’re feeling is too much. This is a time to come together and create support and community We need to find ways to honor our feelings AND consciously acknowledge what IS working 5 Ways to take care of ourselves Get accurate information I’ve been going to the CDC Be mindful of where you’re getting your information PLEASE do NOT talk about your adult fears in front of your children! We adults need places to process our fears—with other adults Find ways to give your kids answers to the questions they ask, but they are looking to us to know everything is going to be ok Consciously curate what you’re consuming When you consume What you consume How long you consume Unfriend/unfollow E-mail/social media/friends Create positive things to consume Things that make you laugh, are light, positive and maintain balance Ask for suggestions for books, movies, podcasts, music playlists Spend time outdoors Engage in creative activities Spend time with animals, children, loved ones, friends Spirituality Plan with calmness Work, childcare, homeschooling, logistics, care of aging parents, logistics etc. Designate the amount of time (when/where you will plan) Plan with a buddy Make a planning sandwich—positive, plan, positive Get support/Create community Zoom call for the closed fb group Many therapists and coaches are moving to telehealth Connect with your friends/family via Skype, WhatsApp, Voxer, MarcoPolo See how your community is supporting others We get a sense of connection through service Ask for help/support—it allows others to feel good and focus on something outside of themselves Self-Care Sleep Nutrition Gentle loving movement Get outside Dance, laugh, play, meditate, yoga (yoga with Adriene) Spend time with people that make you happy Ask for help and support Tend to your spiritual needs—meditation or prayer or time in nature PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more). LINKS Yoga with Adriene-- https://www.youtube.com/user/yogawithadriene Marco Polo-- https://www.marcopolo.me/ Whatsapp-- https://www.whatsapp.com/ Voxer-- https://www.voxer.com/individuals Skype-- https://www.skype.com/en/ 10 Tilts for Parenting during the CaronaVirus-- https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10156721476846423&set=a.114668386422&type=3&theater&ifg=1 Brene Brown Getting Well Together or Staying Sick Together-- https://www.facebook.com/brenebrown/photos/a.194293500585767/3287297457952007/?type=3&theater&ifg=1   HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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Mar 10, 2020 • 39min

063 A Research Scientist Talks About Brain Research in The Highly Sensitive Person with Dr. Bianca Acevedo

TITLE A Research Scientist Talks About Brain Research in the Highly Sensitive Person GUEST Dr. Bianca Acevedo EPISODE OVERVIEW Dr. Bianca Acevedo talks about how the brain responds to emotional displays, and what deep processing really entails. She explains the different ways the insula processes information. She also talks about intuition, and she answers the question: Do HSPs have more mirror neurons? I was surprised at the answer! Dr. Acevedo talks about a way that HSPs can recharge in 8 minutes, and she talks about the overall percentage of people who are very sensitive, moderately sensitive and less sensitive. HIGHLIGHTS Acevedo worked with Dr. Arthur Aron She has studied romantic love and newleyweds Acevedo looked at brain responses to emotional display Highly Sensitive People are more affected by others’ emotional displays These studies used MRI scanners They looked at empathy, mirror neurons, and the insula Do HSPs have more mirror neurons? The researchers measured blood and oxygen levels HSPs process information more deeply The insula processes information in the following ways—visual, auditory, tactile, vestibular, reward system, and via the organs There is a signature pattern of response to certain things Things that become activated in response to different things Burn out can happen when we over process and we don’t get a break to recharge and recover In a memory study, HSPs who took 8 minutes to rest and close their eyes between tasks, outperformed non-HSPs Rumination is not a feature of being a Highly Sensitive Person. It correlates to having anxiety and depression, which can start as early and infancy/childhood HSPs are more sensitive to environments The impact can be lifelong and it impacts our emotional and social well-being HSPs can immerse themselves in supportive environments Acevedo was referred to as eccentric/quirky It’s important to have respect for each other’s differences (HSP vs. non-HSP) Hopefully parents who are raising male children are supporting the traits their boys show Perhaps with increasing awareness about gender fluidity and gender roles, parents are allowing their kids to express whatever traits they have It’s important to have at least 1 HSP in a group to pick up on things that might have been lost by the non-HSP, and it’s important to have a less sensitive person in the group It’s important to be kind to yourself To accept that we need to take times for ourselves 30% of the population are very sensitive, 40% are moderately sensitive and 30% are less sensitive HSPs are an increase sense of self-awareness, contemplation and reflection This is an important piece of evolving and moving forward as a species GUEST BIO Dr. Bianca Acevedo is a research scientist at the University of California, Santa Barbara, a Visiting Scholar at New York University, a private consultant, author, and sought-after public speaker. She has done extensive research on the science of love, highly sensitive persons and mind-body practices. She has taught courses on close relationships and positive psychology, and was the recipient of the 2012 International Women in Science Award. She is the developer of the LoveSmart App and her work has been funded by the National Science Foundation, the National Institute of Health, and the Alzheimer’s Association. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more). LINKS Dr. Acevedo www.biancaacevedo.org Patricia’s Links To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Meetup-- https://www.meetup.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-Meetup/ e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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Mar 3, 2020 • 24min

Bonus Episode 67 What to Do When We're Having Uncomfortable Feelings We Don't Like

TITLE What To Do When We’re Having Uncomfortable Feelings That We Don’t Like GUEST Solo Episode EPISODE OVERVIEW How do we deal with feelings of depression, anxiety, disappointment, frustration, anger? We may experience shame when we have feelings (especially if we’re therapists) because there’s this belief that we shouldn’t struggle with very human things. How do we still show up and be present for others when we are struggling? Do we have a hard time asking for what we want? Do we worry about how others will respond if we’re struggling? I share my recent (and current) experiences with this.  HIGHLIGHTS How do we deal with feelings of depression, anxiety, disappointment, frustration, anger? We may experience shame when we have feelings if we’re therapists because there’s that belief that we shouldn’t struggle with very human things How do we still show up and be present for others when we are struggling? Having a few supportive people who can just be present for us and listen to us, can be incredibly healing When we have a few people that share honestly with us, we feel a sense of connection and validation We can use tapping (Emotional Freedom Techniques or EFT) when we are having feelings that we want to work through We can reach out to safe people to get connection when we are having uncomfortable feelings What are things you are afraid to ask for out of fear of feeling disappointed, frustrated, and angry? Many of us have friendship wounds Sometimes we want to go dark when we are having uncomfortable feelings—does this really support us? There is power in having other HSPs or people who get you when you are struggling Can you just be with intense feelings (depression, anxiety, frustration, etc.), and just lean into it? When we can continue to suit up and show up even when we’re having big feelings, it reminds us that we can manage We probably have already experienced intense hurt or disappointment in the past, so we can probably tolerate whatever happens if we put our wants or needs out and don’t get them met We also open ourselves to experience joy and connection when we take a risk Even if we feel shame, we can still talk about what’s going on and feel connected We’ve got to have self-compassion when we’re going through things We just have to show up and be ourselves PODCAST HOST Patricia knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, truthteller and blacksheep.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other HSPs know that they aren’t alone, and that being an HSP has amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for HSPs that focus on understanding what it means to be an HSP, self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors us LINKS Meetup--https://www.meetup.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-Meetup/events/268428586/ HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  
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Feb 25, 2020 • 43min

062 A Listener Asks, “How Do I Manage Overarousal During an Interview—Because I Can’t Demonstrate What I Know?” with KJ McDaniels

TITLE A Listener Asks, “How Do I Manage Overarousal During an Interview—Because I Can’t Demonstrate What I Know?” GUEST KJ McDaniels EPISODE OVERVIEW We talk about assessing skills and using visualization to internalize our competence; how to articulate our need for time to respond to questions during an interview.  How to talk about our strengths when asked about challenges we experience.  We also talk about how to communicate what our learning process can look like, and to emphasize the strengths we bring. How to create routines and landing spaces in order to keep track of glasses, keys, wallets, etc., and ways to remember appointments.  HIGHLIGHTS KJ had an upcoming interview and had some concerns KJ was told she needed to respond more in-depth Having a high arousal state causes KJ to go into fight or flight We talk about needing some tools to be able to stay in the pre-frontal cortex KJ had pages on how to navigate the interview, but still was put on the waitlist KJ wonders if she may have ADHD as well When KJ is under pressure doing her job, she is able to manage her job KJ is able to anticipate possible outcomes and is competent in her job KJ believes that she struggles with communication due to how she was raised We assess if KJ is able to answer the questions when she’s not overaroused When we haven’t experienced being seen and heard in the past, those can be small traumas that can impact current performance The goal is to create safety in new environments We want to create a way to feel safe in new environments It might be our “task manager” We still need to honor our feelings and all of the parts of us The task master often doesn’t have the fear around performing and answering questions Using visualizations to affirm—I’ve got this; I’m safe; I’m capable We want to shift from our feeling brain into our emotional brain We want to find out where that little person wants to go (to a safe place; NOT in the adult interview) The Highly Sensitive Person can be great on teams, when conditions/systems aren’t set up to honor everyone HSPs are great listeners, and leaders, and we notice those people who aren’t engaging in groups/teams For an interview, we want to talk about the things that did work, and our strengths Empathy Leadership Problem-solving skills How to answer questions that have to do with challenges How to talk about our strengths from a challenge How to articulate our depth of processing as a strength How to use routine in order to help with challenges with working memory HSPs who think they have ADHD, may just be overaroused and overstimulated Create routines and a landing spaces for things like keys, glasses, wallet, and other things we need on a regular basis We don’t have to feel shame when we let others know what we need in order to perform well How to do a visualization at night to imagine ourselves feeling confident and competent to create a sense of calm How to use jewelry and clothes to use for subtle self-soothing Some of us need to fidget to focus—move when we are doing passive activities (talking on the phone, listening to a podcast or audiobook) Do the Superwoman pose to feel empowered and strong Our culture rewards extroverts who are external processors, and it’s not geared to honor introverts and HSPs who may need more time to fully process and respond HSPs are really going to think about treatment and the best outcomes due to our depth of processing and taking in additional information that others may not pick up on We can learn to manage fearful anticipation, and it doesn’t have to prevent us from participating in life When we have parents or caregivers who don’t understand how to help us manage our feelings, we don’t learn those tools, and we may think there’s something wrong with us GUEST BIO KJ McDaniels is a Highly & Energy Sensitive Person based in Atlanta, GA. Having a love for the biological sciences, she studied Molecular Cell Biology and Immunology in undergraduate school. She is a small business owner in the animal field, future bovine veterinarian, mutifaceted musician and composer, coloratura opera singer, and most important of all, a loving aunt to a 5 year old. She hopes to spread realistic and positive knowledge about Sensitive Persons through continual conversations. PODCAST HOST Patricia knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, truthteller and blacksheep.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation and compassion.  She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other HSPs know that they aren’t alone, and that being an HSP has amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for HSPs that focus on self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, and creating a lifestyle that honors us LINKS KJ’s email—hspetservices@gmail.com Patricia’s Links HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review”   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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Feb 18, 2020 • 59min

061 Using Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) to Help With Strong Reactions as a Highly Sensitive Person with Alison Morris

TITLE Using Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) to Help With Strong Reactions as a Highly Sensitive Person GUEST Alison Morris EPISODE OVERVIEW Alison Morris talks about the benefits of using EFT, Emotional Freedom Techniques, also known as tapping, to help release stress; calm our nervous system; change brain waves, disrupt fear signals from the amygdala, and to change core beliefs.  We demonstrate how to tap on the belief of being too sensitive.  Alison talks about the importance of acknowledging, allowing, accepting and having awareness of our feelings, and why as a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) this is a powerful tool. HIGHLIGHTS Emotional Freedom Techniques Also known as EFT or tapping Use acupressure points It’s like emotional acupuncture, but without needles Utilizes meridians, which are energy systems within the body In traditional Chinese medicine, meridiansare channels that form a network in the body, through which energy flows Rivers of energy At the meridian in the body, there is more electrical conductivity EFT can be used to Release stress Calm the nervous system Change brain waves Disrupt fear signals from the amygdala (fear or worry) Induce epigenetic changes Turn on immune function Turn off inflammation EFT has been comparably compared in effectiveness to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) It works more quickly with fewer sessions You can try EFT on everything and anything It can help with a troubling memory, something in the present, stress or worry and physical pain It can be the most powerful when used on beliefs we hold about ourselves We pick up beliefs before we are six-years-old that become deeply ingrained Who am I? Is the world safe? The 4 As of EFT Acknowledge How we are feeling There are no wrong or bad feelings Feelings of shame, embarrassment, guilt, anger, sadness, etc. Allowing To feel it Focus on the negative Address what is There is a fear the feeling will never go away Feelings are supposed to be felt; then they move on Accepting I deeply and completely accept myself You are ok no matter what you feel How I am is fine I honor myself and the way I feel I honor my sensitivity and the gifts that it brings My sensitivity is a superpower EFT was designed to be a self-help tool You can tap with a partner or with a therapist or coach who is trained in EFT Common struggles I don’t know what to say or what words to use Don’t worry about it. You don’t have to use words if it’s overwhelming or you can’t come up with the words Not being specific enough—you will get better results if you are specific Notice what you are feeling in your body (head, muscles, stomach, jaws) Possible things to say Even thought I haven’t allowed myself to feel for years, and I’m afraid to start feeling… People have been telling me not to be so sensitive for years… I’m so overwhelmed, and I can’t identify what I’m feelings because it’s such a big mess… You get to be you It’s ok to be angry, swear, scream, cry You can tap in the car or the shower It’s just releasing energy You may sigh, yawn, cry Your focus may get brighter, shoulders drop down, sit up straighter Before tapping— Rate your symptom/distress on a scale of 1-10 Try to pick something that’s not too intense—maybe something that’s a 4-6 in distress Notice where you feel it in your body Start with your “set up phrase” and repeat 3x with the karate chop on the side of your hand Even though I …..I deeply love and accept myself Use the reminder phrase when you tap on the following (see attached picture) Top of the head Above the eyebrow Outside the eye—side of your face Under the eye Under the nose Above the chin Collar bone Under the arm (where are bra strap would be if you wear a bra) It’s helpful to have water nearby so you don’t get dehydrated Often if feels like nothing has happened, but changes are happening The original protocol is to stay with the negative statements It’s like working on it to heal the wound If the negative feelings are subsiding, you can switch to reparative statements, but you don’t want to rush into this You can use tapping to feel honored, safer and to build inner strength SCRIPT FOR TAPPING Even though I really hate being so sensitive, I deeply and completely accept myself. Even though I have felt like a misfit for years because I am so sensitive I deeply and completely accept myself. Even though I really wish sometimes that my sensitivity would just go away. I deeply and completely accept myself. Now we're going to take fingers again either hand we're going to go right to the very top of the head. Like where a puppet would come from, you know, string would come up from the top of a puppet’s head, and just tap lightly while we say what's called a reminder phrase. I hate being so sensitive. All right, we're going to the eyebrow point which is the edge of the eyebrow closest to your nose. Again, you can use either hand or both hands, but just for now let's just use one hand, just tap lightly with two or three fingers. I hate being so sensitive. We follow to the outside of the eye just on that bone gently don't poke yourself in the eye. I'm tired of being such a misfit. Follow that bone underneath your eye. You know just an inch or two below. I really hate being so sensitive. Now we go to under the nose, that little indentation between your nose and your upper lip. I hate being so sensitive. The chin point which is above the chin, below the lower lip in that little indentation. I'm so tired of being so sensitive. Then we go to the collarbone point. So if you find your collarbone your clavicle and trace it sort of to the middle point where the two of them kind of almost come together, drop down an inch, and then go to one side, about two inches and you'll find a kind of a notch like an indentation in there. And that is technically the collarbone point. What I like to do though, just to keep it a little bit simpler is to take all five fingers and go all the way across your chest, below your collarbone. That way you make sure you get that point. I'm so tired of being so sensitive. Then finally we're going to do the underarm pit. This one looks a little weird. About four inches below your armpit. Where a bra strap would cross, you can curl one hand arm up on one side to reach it. Are you can reach across your chest to tap under your arm on the other side of your body, if that makes sense. I hate being so sensitive. Okay, so that's one round of tapping. So let's go back through now a little bit more quickly. Now that we know where all the points are.   GUEST BIO Alison Morris is a certified EFT practitioner who loves helping people understand how they respond to stress and how EFT or tapping can help them quickly and effectively release whatever has them stressed - whether a memory, a physical symptom, or a fear of the future. Alison has focused mostly on helping parents of children with serious emotional and behavioral challenges, many of whom are Highly Sensitive People, through her work at Full Potential Parenting. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more). LINKS Alison’s Links Website--http://full-potential-parenting.com Facebook--https://www.facebook.com/FullPotentialParenting/ YouTube--https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbvovgDdQFAaosog6di9XiQ/videos Highly Sensitive Person self-test--https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ Patricia Carrington, PhD The Choices Method--https://patcarrington.com/introducing-the-choices-method/ Gary Craig EFT Tapping--https://www.emofree.com/ I wasn’t able to include the sheet for tapping (sorry).  If you go to the closed fb group (link below), the diagram is already posted there.  Alison and I will be making a video and I will post a link in the group for you. Patricia’s Links HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Meetup-- https://www.meetup.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-Meetup/ Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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Feb 11, 2020 • 56min

060 Tom Falkenstein, Author of the Book The Highly Sensitive Man: Finding Strength in Sensitivity

TITLE The Highly Sensitive Man: Finding Strength in Sensitivity, Author Tom Falkenstein   GUEST Tom Falkenstein, MA   EPISODE OVERVIEW Tom Falkenstein, author of the book The Highly Sensitive Man discusses the pressure men feel to be strong and to not show their emotions, and how Highly Sensitive Men can feel they’re not living up to the masculine ideal. He talks about how we can support sensitive boys, and we talk about how men lose touch with their intuition. Tom shares some tools he used when he was feeling nervous about being on television, and he talks about his own strengths as a Highly Sensitive Man.     HIGHLIGHTS Michael Pluess talks about the trait of being an HSP as Environmental Sensitivity Some Highly Sensitive Males struggle with being sensitive, and they receive feedback that they are not ok, or that they are too feminine Tom noticed there weren’t many books about the Highly Sensitive Man Tom wanted to make the trait of High Sensitivity visible Many men grow up with a sense that they didn’t satisfy the boy code Some men feel that they are not living up the masculine ideal of being stoic, self-reliant and embracing competition Men are not born less emotional than women When we let feelings build up and don’t express them, it is likely we will have a blow-up or a melt-down Tim answers the question—How do men balance being sensitive with the traditional ideas of men being “strong and not showing their emotions?” The idea that men should NOT show their emotions is NOT healthy It’s important to learn to appreciate your sensitivity Men can be confident about being sensitive Men can learn they can be themselves and NOT to be ashamed Not showing emotions is a huge conflict ALL men experience, but even more so for the Highly Sensitive Man Being emotionally expressive is not the typical masculine ideal, and showing emotions can trigger feelings of shame, insecurities and not feeling worthy How can parents support young boys who show signs of being Highly Sensitive? It’s crucial NOT to shame boys for being sensitive Being emotional is fine. Feelings provide information, and we can change our feelings and work with them Feelings are important We don’t want to label a child as being Highly Sensitive (per Dr. Elaine Aron)—meaning telling the child they are a Highly Sensitive Child (HSC) We can use descriptive terms to model and teach the child—you are really sad, it hurts your feelings when xx happens etc. It’s important to allow feelings, talk about feelings and to model feelings Why is it that men learn to believe everything they are told instead of trusting their intuition or inner voice? Our socialization (for both men and women) influences whether we are taught to honor and trust our inner voice or to abandon it for the external rules Don’t call your child shy or quiet. It can be very damaging! Highly Sensitive Children (and some adults) prefer to stand at the sidelines and observe before participating. We are more cautious and want to get the lay of the land before jumping in If I child is Highly Sensitive, do you tell them that they are?     GUEST BIO TOM FALKENSTEIN has worked in the mental health sector since 1999 and as a cognitive behavioral psychotherapist since 2006. After obtaining his degree in psychology at the University of Glasgow, he completed his five-year postgraduate training in psychotherapy in Berlin. He then moved back to the UK where he worked as a psychotherapist in London. During this period, he developed a particular interest in high sensitivity and working with highly sensitive people. He has been training with Dr. Elaine Aron (author of "The Highly Sensitive Person") since 2015 and has founded the European Centre for High Sensitivity (www.hsp-eu.com). Currently practicing in Berlin, he also offers consultations for highly sensitive people in both English and German. "The Highly Sensitive Man" is his first book and was published in Germany by Junfermann in September 2017. It has been translated into a number of other languages.   PODCAST HOST Patricia Young hosts the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive, and works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more).   LINKS Tom’s Links   Website  http://www.hsp-eu.com/ Instagram https://instagram.com/tomfalkenstein     The Highly Sensitive Man: Finding Strength in Sensitivity by Tom Falkenstein Strong Sensitive Boy by Ted Zeff   Dr. Ted Zeff--https://www.drtedzeff.com/   T.V. Show Long Island Medium with Theresa Caputo     Patricia’s Links   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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Feb 4, 2020 • 24min

Bonus Episode 66 The Unspoken Strengths of the Highly Sensitive Person—Mainly, the Power of Our Presence

TITLE The Unspoken Strengths of the Highly Sensitive Person—Mainly, the Power of Our Presence GUEST Solo Episode EPISODE OVERVIEW HSPs have a powerful ability to show up and be present for others.  We often feel less than because we compare the accomplishments of others without realizing that we hold space, listen and notice things in a powerful way.  Our society is very oriented to doing. For the Highly Sensitive Person, we excel at being, which is not always appreciated, recognized or valued.  In this episode, we also look at a number of the perceived weaknesses of HSPs and talk about the corresponding strengths/superpowers we have.  HIGHLIGHTS Episode 59 with Azul Terronez called Influence Comes from Service really highlights many of the unspoken strengths of the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) Our culture tends to measure success in terms of doing and achievements vs. the power of presence and being As HSPs, we have an amazing ability to hold space, listen, recognize and observe things that most people don’t We are often the emotional glue that holds our families and relationships together It’s often easy for use to measure the non-HSPs parts of our relationships to others, and to forget how powerful our presence is to others Often systems are set up in ways that can make us feel that there is something wrong with us, but it’s the system or person that isn’t functional/responsive or able to meet our need(s) Many of us have the wound of too much and not enough When we start comparing, we WILL feel inadequate How can we honor what comes up for us, and be able to address the subtext (when appropriate)? THIS is our greatest strength POSITIVE MESSAGES—OUR SUPERPOWERS I value self-care, and am in need of rest and recharging I process more information on a deeper level I’m good at trying new things and I enjoy the moment I trust my process and I take the time I need I’m not afraid to feel I’m in touch with my emotions I feel things deeply; it’s healthy and I’m strong, and it allow me to be myself I see things that others don’t What I do is valuable What I bring is valuable I am valuable I am so beautifully in touch with myself, which is a gift to myself, and others. Everyone is doing their best I teach others by example how to feel deeply and how to experience a wide range of human emotions PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, and is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more). LINKS Episode 59 Influence comes from service with Azul Terronez https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/episode-59/   Episode 5 I gave myself permission to be me, and not place undue expectations about who I should be with Melvin Varghese, PhD https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologetically-sensitive-episode-5/   Episode 17 part 1 & 2 Conversations with a non-binary HS Therapist with Dara Hoffman-Fox https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologetically-sensitive-episode-17-part-1/ https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologetically-sensitive-episode-17-part-2/ To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select “listen on Apple Podcasts” chose “open in itunes” choose “ratings and reviews” click to rate the number of starts click “write a review” HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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Jan 28, 2020 • 1h 1min

059 Influence Comes From Service; I Just Need To Show Up And Be Myself

TITLE Influence Comes From Service; I Just Need To Show Up And Be Myself GUEST Azul Terronez EPISODE OVERVIEW Author, Podcaster and Book Whisperer, Azul Terronez, was afraid to write a book.  He talks about not being good at reading and writing, and flunking freshman English at UCLA; he later learned he has dyslexia.  He’s helped authors who have become international best sellers, and he has a TEDx talk called What Makes a Good Teacher that has over 1.6 million views. Azul names his superpowers, which are traits of being Highly Sensitve—oberserving, connecting, listening & accepting. He discovers during this episode that he thinks he may be a Highly Sensitive Person. HIGHLIGHTS Azul loved telling stories, and he wanted to be a writer, but his teachers discouraged him because he wasn’t good at reading or writing Azul found out in his late 20’s he had dyslexia Azul flunked Freshman English at UCLA He became an English teacher (but didn’t have a degree in teaching) Azul could see words and how they work Although he wanted to write a book, he didn’t have access to a publisher and he believed he wasn’t good enough Azul taught his students how to publish books A student asked Azul where was his book, but he had been too afraid to write a book Azul signed up for Pat Flynn & Chris Ducker’s 1 Day Breakthrough Workshop, but had no book or anything to show he had a business He decided to write a book in 30 days (the workshop was a little over 30 days away) Azul wondered Can I make a living outside of being a teacher? Azul wrote the book The Art of Apprenticeship and sent it to a publisher the day before the workshop Azul became a principal and an administrator, but it was difficult because he had to emotionally manage adults If I play a role, I can be successful I could be very strong, but I felt isolated I felt supported, but distant I found the language to describe my experience I would feel so much It helped me help other people I noticed what I was experiencing Pat Flynn asked Azul to help him write his book, which became an international best seller Azul has been able to live all over the world He has a podcast called Born to Write QUOTES I just need to show up and be myself Influence comes from service I can show up and serve You can be yourself, and I will hold that space for you Acting is what I’m doing in Life. [studying acting in college] This will make me successful I was observant, sensitive, and I paid attention more I had to find the language to describe my experience I bring the story out of people I’m good at thinking ahead and anticipating what people need I helped kids blossom GUEST BIO Azul Terronez has been called a book whisperer  He helps leaders write and publish books that people love so they can create their brand, grow their audience, and increase their influence. His signature coaching program is built around the idea that creating books is about building the conversation that you want to own. Azul is the CEO of Authors Who Lead™ and the host of the top writing podcast Born to Write. His TEDx talk “What Makes a Good Teacher Great” has been viewed over 1.6 million times. Azul’s clients have included Wall Street Bestseller, Pat Flynn from the Smart Passive Income Podcast, Jadah Sellner co-founder Simple Green Smoothies and Dana Malstaff the founder of Boss-mom. He lives in San Juan, Puerto Rico.   PODCAST HOST Patricia Young works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more). LINKS Azul’s Links Website: https://authorswholead.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SteveAndAzul/ Instagram: @azulterronez Podcast Born to Write--https://coachazul.com/blog/tag/born-to-write-podcast/ Tedx Talk What Makes a Good Teacher Great-- https://mail.google.com/mail/u/1/#inbox/FMfcgxwDrRSjVrwJZgglRJJQvwjxDtsw?projector=1 Dr. Elaine Aron’s website—HSP Self-Test--https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ Patricia’s Links HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/   Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
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Jan 21, 2020 • 59min

058 Honoring the Highly Sensitive Introvert with Nicole Burgess, LMFT

TITLE Honoring the Highly Sensitive Introvert GUEST Nicole Burgess, LMFT EPISODE OVERVIEW What do people need to know about introverts? Do introverts tend to need more time to process? Do they tend to process internally vs. processing verbally in the moment? Are introverts shy, anxious, or do they hate people? Are introverts slow to warm up? We tackle some common myths about introversion.  This is a fun, spontaneous interview, with lots of laughter.  We have a messy, raw conversation about the difference between therapy and coaching that goes badly. HIGHLIGHTS Highly Sensitive People (HSPs), are really in-tune with things vs. calling it highly sensitive The biggest difference between coaching and therapy is there is no diagnosis and people are mentally healthier; meaning they have a stronger sense of self, yet are open to going deeper in letting go of old beliefs/mindsets, etc. I also think we therapists are great coaches because we know how to ask great questions; help in getting people to move forward in their lives vs stay in a disempowered mode. We also have training in communication, boundaries, and so much. Each of us can bring our skills as therapists and other professions into coaching What’s the difference between coaching and therapy? Is therapy only about the past and coaching is only about the future? What are the benefits of online coaching or therapy? What kind of coaches do therapists make? Introversion—True or false? Introverts are “shy, anxious, hates people” True or false? introverts struggle w self-confidence and don’t know their souls What does the world need to know about introverts? A special shout out to April Snow for connecting many of us Highly Sensitive Therapists What do we do when we’re in a social situation and we don’t feel heard, and one person is dominating the conversation? We talk about play       BIO Nicole Burgess, LMFT, is a licensed psychotherapist and leadership coach to introverted high achieving professional women in midlife. Over the last fifteen years she has coached, guided and collaborated with over a 1,000 women. She helps them demote their inner critic, embrace their fears through action, and grow professionally without sacrificing their personal life. As a result, they are more productive at work, have more meaningful relationships, and no longer sacrifice their well-being for others.   PODCAST HOST Patricia Young hosts the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive, and works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them to understand their HSP traits, and turning their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate the amazing gifts they have to offer. Patricia works globally online with HSPs providing coaching. Patricia also facilitates online groups for HSPs that focus on building community and developing skills (identifying your superpowers, boundaries, perfectionism, dealing with conflict, mindfulness, embracing emotions, creating a lifestyle that supports the HSP, communication and more). LINKS  Nicole’s Links https://ww.nicoleburgesscoaching.com https://www.facebook.com/nicoleburgesscoaching https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicoleburgesscoach/   Soulfilled Sisterhood Podcast-- https://nicoleburgesscoaching.com/podcast/ Launching Your Daughter Podcast-- https://nicolecburgess.com/launchingyourdaughter/ Introversion, Extroversion and the Highly Sensitive Person by Jacquelyn Strickland-- https://hsperson.com/introversion-extroversion-and-the-highly-sensitive-person/   Patricia’s Links Online HSP Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/ Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Pinterest-- https://www.pinterest.com/patriciayounglcsw/ e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com

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