Crafting Solutions to Conflict

Vik Kapoor is back for a second visit. His first was on October 29, 2020, in Episode 96. You can listen here: https://bit.ly/2JcUcmZThat time we talked about the UN peer conflict coaching program that he was involved in.This time we discuss his book about self-coaching, First Serve Yourself: How Young Leaders Around the World are Winning on Their Own Terms. We talk about positive and negative emotions, bias, and tools that individuals can use to effectively coach themselves.You can learn more about Vik at his company website: https://extra-m.com/. Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving. 

First, we can think through just when we are at our best – and our worst.  Time of day? Day of the week? Location?  Can we set up a tough conversation for the time and place when we are at our best? Next, we can be aware of how to be prepared to be at our best when we know in advance that we will be engaged in a difficult conversation. Sometimes we don’t have the luxury of time or much advance notice. What could we adopt as a way to quickly reset and pull ourselves into position for the situation?              Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving.  

When thinking about self-awareness and preventing negative conflict, let’s focus on the habits we have, the most obvious patterns we adopt, the knee-jerk reactions (which can have a dangerous capacity for making us appear to be or actually be jerks). We can benefit from taking a moment – or two – to reflect on what is increasing the likelihood of negative conflict unnecessarily. Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving. 

David Ehrlichman discusses his work at Converge, a network of practitioners who cultivate impact networks. His book, impact networks, sets out how co-creating networks beside, across, or even within hierarchical organizations can tap into the creativity of individuals who co-create networks centered on a common purpose. Visit the Converge website to learn more about their work and the book, to read their blog, to find links to four- and eighteen-minute films, and to take advantage of the free network toolkit. https://www.converge.net/You can find David on LinkedIn and on twitter @davehrlichman.Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving.  

The flip side of the dangers of shortcuts is the benefit of a detour.  That is, allowing a conversation to wander to where it needs to go to get at the nub of the conflict. For me, useful detours can come up in conflict coaching, mediation, and more general conflict consulting. In coaching, the value can be in a deeper dive into what makes a client tick. In mediation, the detour may be into what else matters to the people involved, beyond what they initially state. In consulting, the challenge can be presented as one of a very specific and limited problem. Let’s take a little detour into how the problem became intractable. And what you can do to prevent the next “very specific and limited problem” from blowing up. If you aren’t a conflict professional, and are directly involved in a conflict, you can consider whether it would be wise to take a look to the side of the issue. Is there something to see there? Perhaps the scenic route is worth the trip.Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving.  

Generally, we tend to think of shortcuts as good and detours as bad. Yet, in the specific context of dealing with conflict, it’s often the reverse. Although it can be tempting to race ahead, assuming that no preparation is needed for a successful mediation session, that shortcut can be actually harmful – diminishing the possibility of a positive outcome and risking making a difficult situation even worse.Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving. 

Adam Kahane has worked for thirty years as a facilitator of diverse groups in a variety of settings around the world. We discuss the insights he has gained from his work, captured in his five books. In his most recent book, Facilitating Breakthrough, Adam sets out how to “remove obstacles, build bridges, and move forward together.”  You can learn more about his work and find free resources at his firm’s website: https://reospartners.com/Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving. 

The phrase “holding space” is most frequently heard in the context of therapy or psychology. In the context of discussions or meetings, the concept is one of deliberately accepting and anticipating the possibility – even the likelihood – of needing some time and “space” set aside for what may come that is not fully planned for. Time and space to allow for creativity, collaboration and yes – conflict. The good kind where different ideas and perspectives are voiced and a positive type of clash follows.Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving. 

Courage is not the absence of fear, but a positive way to handle fear. The same could be said of negative stimuli (hot buttons, triggers) and responding in the best way possible.Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving. 

Mitzi enjoys sharing what she has learned about successful family businesses. Her interest is personal: she was born into the Henderson family, founders of the Sheraton Hotel chain, and she married into the Perdue family, where her husband, Frank, was the head of the family-owned poultry business. Both families are thriving through the generations. In this episode, Mitzi talks about Frank Perdue’s humility, his genuine interest in those who were part of the Perdue community, and his recognition of the value in hearing different – even conflicting – opinions. You can find her most recent book, The Frank Perdue Way, on Amazon or through her website, where you can learn more about Mitzi’s passion for helping family businesses thrive through generations: https://mitziperdue.com/Mitzi is dedicated to the fight to stop human trafficking.  To learn more text WIN to 55312 or visit https://www.winthisfight.org/Win This Fight focuses on “two of the greatest needs of the anti-trafficking community: we raise funds for other anti-trafficking organizations, and we help raise awareness.”You can listen to my first conversation with Mitzi, in Episode 128, published on June 9, 2021, here: https://bit.ly/3gpaJRRDo you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/And you can follow us on Twitter @conflictsolving.