Grace + Boundaries: Navigating Intergenerational Trauma with Erin Hearts

~Re-released popular episode from 2022~Do you believe that the emotional injuries you suffered in childhood stick with you until they are processed?  Or do you think we can just "keep them in the past" and deny they exist? I know from experience that I'm not able to sweep what happened to me as a child under the rug. I've been suffering from a lot of insomnia related to my perfectionism and workaholism. My brain wants to wake up in the middle of the night and fight fires. The "fires" are my brain's perception of mistakes I've made throughout the day and things I should do better next time. This stems from a deep fear I have of messing up and then getting yelled at or shamed for how I'm never good enough. I unconsciously believe that if I'm not perfect, I will get in trouble with authority figures, or maybe, die. It's that serious in my body. This is directly connected to the verbal abuse my parents inflicted on me in my childhood. So, how do I deal with that now? I share a pathway I've found- using EMDR and Family Systems therapy. I discuss how to comfort that inner child who's so worried she's not doing it right. I hope to reintegrate that fearful part of me into my adult self so that I can (literally) sleep better at night! Thank you for listening! Healing is possible!I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite!https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

I have three interviews schedule for the month of October- a memoirist, a trauma-informed money coach, and a sex therapist that can help us navigate difficult conversations with our children surrounding sex and our bodies. Those interviews will be coming soon! Please rate and review my podcast to help me know you are listening and enjoying it! Here are some past episodes that you might enjoy:What's emotional self-care? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000543252887Emotional Abuse Validation: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000544672391Dating Deathtrap https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000579278484 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

I'm celebrating my 100th episode this week!!!!!!! I thought long and hard about how to make it extra special. I decided to invite someone I look up to, someone who is always curious and interested in new things... someone who loves me... my DAD! We philosiphize about two of my dad's favorite things: football and mathematics.Listen to hear why learning math is important for every person, how punishments have shifted since my dad was a boy in 1950's Wisconsin, and why football is a metaphor for life. Then, you might even want to stay for the two corny math jokes at the end. Even if you roll your eyes, it will bring back memories of your favorite high school teacher that had passion for his subject. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks for listening! Please leave me a review if you love this podcast so I know you're listening.  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

What do we do after we put our foot in our mouth, or overreact to something someone says? Do we bury our heads in the sand and pretend it never happened? Do we just wish it away and lie to ourselves that it was really no big deal? No! We REPAIR. I love this concept of repair being part of intimacy in relationships. We are flawed humans, so we will always do things to hurt others unintentionally in relationships. I share two stories about how my friends and I repaired after some poor communication. Here's Dr. Becky Kennedy's podcast on repair with Cheryl Strayed! https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/the-one-with-cheryl-strayed-on-repair/id1561689671?i=1000627558864TED talk on Repair with Dr. Becky: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHpPtdk9rco Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Did you have an abuser from your childhood that you haven't seen in many years? I did, and I ran into them a few weeks ago. NOT  a fun experience. I went into a fawning response and took their lead, acting like everything was cool. Inside, I was wanting to gag or yell out in anger, or shake them like, how can you act like this is normal for us to be talking right now?!?!? I share my thoughts about how to deal with abusers from the past, and make the connection between what happened to me then and how it has impacted my life today.  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Do you have the belief that following your dreams, making more money, or getting that dream house/car/job you have always wanted will be extremely difficult to accomplish? I used to, as well. I'm here to tell you today that you can prime your brain for abundance by creating a morning routine for yourself and changing your thought patterns. I've trained my brain to move from those negative, defeating thoughts, towards recognizing when I'm having them and hitting the reset button. This has made a huge difference in the amout of synchronicity that shows up in my life today. So many things have changed for the better ever since I've opened up to the endless, unfathomable possibilities the universe has to offer ever one of us. Listen to these three resources to help you move forward towards reaching your desires. Best of luck! Here's an Insight Time meditation to remind you that "Things Can Be Easy."https://insig.ht/4As33wZTPCb Here's an interview that rocked my world with Joe Dispenza and Lewis Howes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-school-of-greatness/id596047499?i=1000626666518Here's an episode of the Cathy Heller Show- choose one that speaks to you, or this one was good (so many are great!)https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dont-keep-your-day-job/id1191831035?i=1000530016349 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

"Abundance is not something we acquire. It is something we tune into." -Dr. Wayne DyerDo you have an abundance mindset? Are you open to receiving... Love?  Energy?  Time? Attention? Money? At times I've been too much of a giver to the point where eventually, it made me resentful. The other bad part about giving codependently is that it closes us off to receiving gifts from others. We actually feel UNCOMFORTABLE receiving recognition, praise, gifts, attention, etc. Have you ever felt that way? I share a story today about how I opened up myself to receive what others were offering, and how much richer and fuller my summer vacation became when I was willing to put down my fear and take that leap of faith into receiving from the universe. It feels so good. I want that for you, too! Thanks for listening!   Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

MY FAVORITE EPISODE YET!!! I think you'll really love this one, if you're fascinated by intergenerational trauma! I'm super pumped to share my interview with author and breathwork practicioner Melissa Pennel of "Questions You'll Wish You Asked Yourself." After losing her parents and grandparents at a young age and getting sober before college, Melissa walked a path of recovery and self-reflection that led her to study psychology and to write a series of interactive journals that started with "Questions You'll Wish you Asked: A Time Capsule Journal for Mothers and Daughters." (Link below) Melissa and I share a deep conversation about how things that happened in the past impact our lives today. "Our issues are in our tissues," as they say! We discuss the mother/daughter/grandmother relationship at length, and Melissa delicately verbalizes how excatly to ask uncomfortable questions and glean answers that will allow us to live our best lives in the present. Melissa's website: https://www.followyourfirecoaching.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/followingfire/Link to Melissa's book: https://www.amazon.com/Questions-Youll-Wish-You-Asked/dp/1736009508/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1QQMTO7Q9BVMJ&keywords=Questions+you%27ll+wish+you+asked+mom&qid=1692561328&s=books&sprefix=questions+you%27ll+wish+you+asked+mom%2Cstripbooks%2C184&sr=1-1 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Have you found a great therapist for your child? For me, it was a long rode to find a trauma informed therapist that understood my son and I. It was tricky to figure out what exactly my son needed and what I needed to feel safe, heard, and understood. One therapist unexpectedly gave me some amazing advice that I share with you today. I also share a parenting win that demonstrates how all the work you're doing by educating yourself on intergenerational trauma can positively affecting your children and posterity! Thanks for listening! Let me know what you think of the podcast. Rate and review so I can hear what you enjoy and bring you more of it.  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Today's guest,  Jen Towns, has a PhD in Clinical Social Work and recently published a book that gives advice for queer lovers navigating trauma. The book is called "Our Deepest Roots: Navigating Past Trauma to Build Healtheir Queer Relationships."https://www.amazon.com/Our-Deepest-Roots-Navigating-Relationships/dp/B0C6R9CCZD/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1691354079&sr=8-1Jen and I discuss how being queer brings its own set of lived trauma to our love relationships and how we can show up to support our partners, and ourselves, when there is relational conflict. Jen teaches and believes that trauma doesn't happen just in the brain, it happens in the body, and she uses different modalities to treat her clients including EMDR, Internal Family Systems, and DBT, among others.  Jen answers my deepest question of, how do I fit in being bisexual? and How much do I need to be healed to have a healthy relationship? You can find Jen on Instagram/Tiktok@ https://www.instagram.com/your.queer.therapist/Website: https://www.yourqueertherapist.net/ Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!