Monogamous romantic relationships have been seen as the norm for a long time. They’re the kind most commonly represented in the media, often as the only “right” kind of relationship. However, open relationships, polyamory, and other consensual non-monogamous relationships are more common than you might think. People with ADHD often find ways of living life outside of the typical standard. This could include being non-monogamous!Martha Kauppi is a marriage and family therapist and sex therapist. She is the author of the book Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists (And Their Clients). Listen to this conversation on jealousy, reaching agreements with your partner, and what consensual non-monogamy really is.Related resourcesPolyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists (And Their Clients) by Martha Kauppi8 Steps To Opening Up: Starting The Conversation About Non-Monogamy, a Free eBook by Martha KauppiMartha Kauppi’s website, www.instituteforrelationalintimacy.comTimestamps(00:55) Why learn about consensual non-monogamy?(04:04) What is consensual non-monogamy?(05:36) What is the biggest misconception about non-monogamy?(08:40) Building a relationship that works for you, not just what you see in the media(11:46) Viewing non-monogamy as an option in life(15:42) Moving toward consensual non-monogamy in a relational way(21:03) How would you start a conversation about opening your currently monogamous relationship?(24:20) Tips for working through jealousy (25:35) What is compersion?(30:13) It’s OK if non-monogamy isn’t for you! (32:10) Where can you find Martha? For a transcript and more resources, visit the Sorry, I Missed This page on Understood.We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Imagine sitting down for a meal, but somehow, you can’t quite focus on the food in front of you. You’re either distracted by the things around you, or the never-ending to-do list in your head. For many women with ADHD, eating often feels like an afterthought.In this episode, Dr. Monica Johnson explains how ADHD impacts eating habits. From planning meals in advance to impulsive eating and forgetting to eat altogether. Listen as she shares the unique challenges women face in maintaining healthy eating patterns. And learn ways to have a more balanced relationship with food.Related resourcesADHD and womenADHD and dietADHD and eating disordersTimestamps(01:19) Types of eating issues(04:51) ADHD, forgetfulness, and eating(05:50) How to practice healthy eating patternsTo get a transcript and check out more episodes, visit the MissUnderstood channel at Understood.We love to hear from our listeners. Email us at podcast@understood.org. Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Jessica McCabe, creator of the YouTube channel 'How to ADHD', shares her journey from diagnosis at 12 to understanding ADHD at 32. She discusses the transformative moment when ADHD medication made her feel 'normal' and how it boosted her confidence. Jessica opens up about the struggles of being a new mom with ADHD, including navigating social anxiety and postpartum challenges. She also highlights the importance of community support and shares insights on breaking the stigma around ADHD medication.

Individuals with ADHD excel at problem-solving for others, but often struggle with their own challenges. The emotional dysregulation they experience can make it difficult to advocate for themselves. In this discussion, the complexities of transitioning from school to work are revealed, along with the irony of ADHD coaches facing their own organizational hurdles. Tips focus on fostering self-compassion and adapting personal goals for better emotional processing and growth, empowering listeners to navigate their unique journeys.

Have you ever spent hours getting ready for a social event, only to feel that same knot of anxiety when it’s time to go? Or maybe you avoid social events altogether, worried you’ll say the wrong thing.  For some women, juggling ADHD and social anxiety can feel like an ongoing fight. In this episode, Dr. Monica Johnson dives into the connection between ADHD and social anxiety. Watch as she breaks down ways ADHD can make social situations overwhelming. And get tips on how to better manage social interactions.Related resourcesADHD and womenADHD and anxietyTimestamps(01:11) What is social anxiety disorder?(04:28) What does research say about ADHD and social anxiety?(07:22) Strategies for managing social anxietyTo get a transcript and check out more episodes, visit the MissUnderstood channel at Understood.We love to hear from our listeners. Email us at podcast@understood.org. Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

If you have ADHD, the science says you’re much more likely to have a substance use disorder in your life than someone who’s neurotypical. ADHD brains often lack dopamine. Drugs and alcohol can provide a hit of dopamine, albeit a temporary one. That’s why it’s so common for people with untreated ADHD to self-medicate. Elaine O’Brien used to fit that ADHD archetype to a tee. Eventually, though, she entered recovery and also started practicing Ashtanga yoga, a style that she describes as “very rigorous and very codified.”She fell for the physicality of the practice and the routine it demands. “It got me in my body and I started to feel good,” she says. “I really started to feel good.”For years, Elaine had struggled with substance issues and untreated ADHD. She’s been in recovery for almost two decades but recently began to wonder if the ADHD diagnosis she’d rejected in high school might actually be right.How did her journey take this path? Listen to this week’s Hyperfocus episode to find out. Related resourcesElaine’s studio: Second Story Pilates and YogaStudy: Medication reduces risk of drug abuse for people with ADHDADHD and addiction: Knowledge is powerDoes exercise help ADHD?Timestamps(3:04) Elaine’s diagnosis story(7:09) ADHD and substance use(13:52) Exercise and sobriety(19:28) “Isn’t your job to help people calm down?”To get a transcript of this show and check out more episodes, visit the Hyperfocus podcast page at Understood.orgWe love hearing from our listeners. Email us at hyperfocus@understood.org. Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

People with ADHD can benefit from having routines and systems that help them cope. But, what happens when life comes into play and throws that routine off?This week on Tips from an ADHD Coach, Jaye talks about what can happen when we get thrown off our game by special life circumstances like getting sick or moving. Listen for some tips that can help get you back on track.Related resourcesADHD and hormones (Cate Osborn’s story)Timestamps(00:51) Cate’s quote(02:39) ADHD and hormones(03:58) “Exception moments,” or temporary states when our life is a bit different than usual(06:15) How can we help ourselves during these periods?(11:29) RecapFor a transcript and more resources, visit the MissUnderstood page on Understood.orgHave a challenge you’d like Jaye to talk about in an episode? Email or send a voice memo to us at adhdcoachtips@understood.org. Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Have you ever been called a “manic pixie dream girl” by someone you were dating? Is it hard to remember your partner when they’re not with you? ADHD can bring its own set of challenges to dating, and romantic relationships.Producer Margie visits the podcast to share what she’s found on the ADHD Women subreddit, where women with ADHD ask questions and share their challenges and wins. Listen for Cate’s reactions and a chat about common romantic dilemmas for women with ADHD!Related resourcesThe ADHD Women subredditADHD Support for Women by Understood.org’s Facebook groupTimestamps(00:00) Women with ADHD communities, and common dating tropes(03:46) Post #1 “I was too much for him”(06:37) Post #2 “I did 12 loads of laundry to avoid writing a dating profile”(11:56) Post #3 “Anyone else chronically feel like they’re not in a place where they’re ready to date?”(16:27) Post #4 “Having ADHD as a woman and still having to carry the mental load”(22:20) Post #5 “The ADHD struggle of falling in love after every good date”(27:04) Post #6 “Does anyone else struggle with accidentally ignoring their partner or friends?”(34:28) Talking about what gives us shame helps everyoneFor a transcript and more resources, visit the Sorry, I Missed This page on Understood.orgWe love hearing from our listeners. Email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

Women with ADHD often wrestle with the heavy burden of depression, leading to feelings of exhaustion and discouragement. The discussion highlights how ADHD symptoms can easily be mistaken for depression, complicating diagnosis. Dr. Monica Johnson sheds light on the interplay between these conditions, revealing their impact on daily life. Listeners also gain valuable insights into effective strategies for managing this dual struggle, making it a must-listen for anyone facing these challenges.

Editor's note: This episode includes discussion of suicide and self-harm. Please take care when listening and skip this one if you need to.Dr. Stephen Hinshaw is one of the leading voices when it comes to ADHD in women and girls. That’s in large part due to his work on The Berkeley Girls Study. (Its full name is The Berkeley Girls with ADHD Longitudinal Study, but most people know it by that shorthand or acronym: The BGALs Study.)Under Steve’s leadership, researchers began studying 140 girls with ADHD and a control group of nearly 90 girls without it. They’ve been following these girls into their adulthood, producing a reams of information that has helped shape current understanding of ADHD in women and girls. That said, Rae Jacobson had plenty of questions for Steve: Why did you want to study ADHD in girls at a time when it was typically seen as a boys’ disorder? Why is it that one type of ADHD seems to lead to such negative outcomes? What do we do about the stigma that still surrounds the disorder? Related resourcesSteve’s booksThe 3 types of ADHDHow ADHD can affect your mental healthTimestamps(2:20) The beginnings of The Berkeley Girls study(4:26) Combined-type ADHD and negative outcomes(9:18) Self-esteem, ADHD, and girlhood(16:20) ADHD as a “trend”(20:40) What to do about ADHD stigma   To get a transcript of this show and check out more episodes, visit the Hyperfocus podcast page at Understood.orgWe love hearing from our listeners. Email us at hyperfocus@understood.org.  Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give