Sex for Saints

Why do you react the way you do in sexual situations, whether it’s craving something specific, avoiding certain dynamics, or feeling stuck in the same patterns? And why does your partner seem to approach sex so differently? In this episode, we explore how the Enneagram can shed light on your unique relationship to intimacy. The Enneagram isn’t just another personality test - it’s a deep dive into the core fears, desires, and motivations that shape how we show up in the world, including in our sex lives. Each of the nine types brings its own emotional lens to relationships, and when you begin to recognize those patterns in yourself and your partner, things start to make a lot more sense. This episode isn’t about putting you in a box. It’s about offering a new perspective - one that can help you grow in self-awareness, communicate more clearly, and build a more connected and compassionate intimate life. Enneagram Books: The Road Back To You - a basic primer on the enneagram and the types The Path Between Us - about how each type in relationship The Wisdom of the Enneagram - an indepth look at enneagram and each type Sex and the Enneagram - A Guide to Passionate Relationships for the 9 personality types

Discover how sexual discipline can transform marriages by fostering deeper connections and emotional wholeness. Explore the idea that it's not just for singles, but a key element for couples seeking trust and intimacy. Learn practical tips for creating an environment conducive to intimacy and the importance of self-leadership. This discussion highlights how managing desires can lead to a fulfilling love life, free from pressure and shame, emphasizing that the journey towards sexual discipline is ongoing.

The discussion dives into the often-overlooked issues that impact marital intimacy. A strong friendship often masks deeper emotional disconnects, revealing that sexual dissatisfaction is more than just a minor issue. Unresolved conflicts and hidden resentments play significant roles in intimacy struggles. The conversation also emphasizes the importance of communication and encourages couples to rekindle their sexual identities. Ultimately, it’s about healing both the sexual relationship and the underlying emotional ties.

Explore the Two-Choice Dilemma that can silently undermine even the strongest relationships. Discover the struggle couples face between speaking up or staying quiet in intimate settings. Learn why personal growth comes with discomfort and how to confront your anxieties head-on. Delve into the emotional challenges of feeling stuck and the importance of self-reflection in decision-making. This discussion offers valuable insights for those navigating the complexities of intimacy, encouraging listeners to pursue honesty and authenticity.

Forget quick fixes in the bedroom! Discover how true intimacy goes beyond techniques and dives into emotional connections. The discussion reveals that fulfillment in sexual relationships arises from vulnerability and trust, not just the right positions or rhythms. Real-life examples showcase the importance of honest communication in strengthening bonds. It's about doing the harder emotional work that sparks desire and makes partners feel truly wanted.

When your spouse suggests trying something new sexually, like a different position, a toy, or even roleplay, it can catch you off guard. Maybe your first thought is, “Where did that come from?” and your second is, “Do I have to say yes to this to make them happy?” These moments can stir up all kinds of questions: Is this who they really are? Is something missing in our relationship? Are they getting ideas from somewhere else? In this episode, we’re slowing that moment down. Instead of jumping to fear or assumptions, we’re taking a closer look at what’s really going on. Why do we want to try new things in the first place? What do those desires actually mean and what don’t they mean? We’ll talk about how to approach these conversations with curiosity and compassion, and how being honest about our desires can actually bring us closer. Because trying something new doesn’t mean your marriage is broken - it might be an invitation to grow, together.  

Have you ever felt like no matter how much you grow or how open you are to trying new things, it still doesn’t feel like enough for your partner? Maybe they’re asking for more - more intimacy, more variety, more connection, more emotional depth - and despite your efforts, you feel like you're always falling short. In this thought provoking episode, we explore what’s really happening in relationships where one partner feels like they can never give enough, and the other seems to always want something more. We take a closer look at both perspectives to understand the emotions, expectations, and deeper needs that are often hidden beneath the surface. If you’ve ever struggled with feeling inadequate or misunderstood in your relationship, this episode offers insight, compassion, and a path toward greater understanding and connection.

Feeling burnt out from always being the one to initiate sex? This discussion dives into the struggles of the higher desire partner who faces rejection and inquiries about the balance in sexual dynamics. Discover how constant initiating can impact relationships and the importance of communication. Explore the role of emotional vulnerability and whether stepping back from initiation can restore intimacy. Perfect for anyone wondering why they're the only one trying in their relationship!

Do you ever feel frustrated when your spouse doesn’t want sex the same way, or as often, as you do? In this episode, we explore how rigid expectations around sex can lead to disconnection and resentment in marriage. You’ll hear why focusing too much on “your” version of sex can actually block the emotional intimacy you're craving. Whether it's about initiation, frequency, or what “real” sex looks like, we’ll unpack how to move from frustration to deeper connection. This is a conversation about letting go of control and rediscovering what sex can truly mean for your relationship.

Ever found yourself pulled out of a beautiful, intimate moment by the thought, “Ugh, now I have to clean up”? You’re definitely not alone. For many women, post-sex cleanup can feel like an annoying chore that disrupts connection and intimacy. In this episode, we’re getting real about why this moment matters—and how to simplify the cleanup process so you can stay present, connected, and fully enjoy that sweet afterglow with your spouse.