Sex for Saints Episode 360 - Your Sexual Locus of Control
Mar 14, 2025
The discussion dives into the common 'if only' mindset surrounding sexual frustrations in relationships. It contrasts internal and external locus of control, revealing how shifting focus inward can lead to real change. Personal growth in marriage is emphasized, showcasing how it refines individuals rather than attempting to control a partner. Listeners are provided with five actionable steps to cultivate internal control, ultimately fostering a more fulfilling and connected sexual experience.
AI Snips
Chapters
Transcript
Episode notes
Attempts To Change Often Backfire
- People try to change partners with books, podcasts, and pressure but partners often resist and dig in.
- Amanda Lauder highlights common reactions like withdrawal, anger, and passive-aggression that backfire.
Control Shapes Sexual Experience
- Locus of control determines whether you feel empowered or powerless in your sexual relationship.
- Shifting from external to internal changes focus from your partner's actions to your own choices.
Both Partners Can Be Externally Trapped
- Both higher- and lower-desire partners can fall into external control beliefs and feel trapped.
- Internal control lets you ask what you can do and how you want to show up instead of blaming them.