Rachel DeAlto, author of Relatable, and TV relationship expert and I discuss being "relatable", and why it's so much more than being "likable."   It's about someone wanting to connect with you on a deeper level, because you emit 3 things.   This episode will help you to have better relationships in dating & while making new friendships!  Here are some amazing things you'll hear in the episode: -The 3 factors to being "relatable!" -- Connect, Communicate and Inspire - One in four Americans report that they have zero friends (twenty years ago it was one in ten) - How many 'connections' we need to actually be happy (you'll be happy to hear what Rachel reports) - The best ways to meet new people in an easy way - How to become more relatable even if you have social anxiety - Why digging into your 'personality flaws' makes a big difference  - If you're wondering whether you're "positive" - we talk about the "Positivity Scale" and what things impact your positivity  Enjoy the episode, and share it with everyone who needs it to put more love and relatability into the world!    Here is a link to Rachel's book:   RACHEL'S BIO Rachel DeAlto is a communication and relatability expert, media personality, and speaker. She is the author of “relatable: How to Connect with Anyone Anywhere (Even if It Scares You)” (Simon & Schuster’s Tiller Press, Fall 2021). Rachel has appeared as a relationship expert on Lifetime’s Married at First Sight and TLC’s Kate+Date.  Rachel DeAlto maintains a law degree, a Master’s in psychology, and an influential social media presence, engaging and inspiring over150,000 active followers over her platforms. In addition to her regular appearances, Rachel has also been featured on a multitude of media outlets including The TODAY Show, Access Hollywood Live, and Fox News. She has also given three TEDx talks including Being Authentic in a Filtered World which is featured on TED.com. Join our free newsletter database by signing up here:  www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy Schedule your consultation with us here!   We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you!  https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

Sugar is a 46 year old woman working at a large multinational firm, who sits on many non-profit boards (including her alma mater, Purdue U)!  She was married to a man she met in college, and went through a devastating divorce after 10 years.  It took Sugar 8 years to get back on her feet.   She had a lot of anxiety & tons of self-doubt around doing this again, and she bravely started her journey one year ago.   Was it easy?  No.  Did she find love and prevail?  Yes!   This inspiring story will make you know that love exists for ANYONE that wants it, including you.  Learn what Sugar did to find love, including: The Perfect Storm in her life that pushed her off the edge The fortune cookie message that said, "You need to make more time for romance" How her demons did a "number" of er self confidence How her "stubbornness" held her back (and it's SO similar to most of our clients and what they WANT vs. NEED) How psychotic optimism became her motto How Marilyn Dollar's success story on Bela's IG Live show inspired her to really put it into high gear, and change the way she dated Her Dating "FUN"-NEL and how she made it FUN What site she met Justin on, and he lives 100 miles awayyyy....Whattttt? Their first date was on his birthday Their first trip together What's going to happen now that he is moving to Dallas to go to pilot training school??? Tune in to the WHOLE episode to hear this darling story, and Sugar told her story to inspire YOU to find love!    Check out Sugar's story on our website at https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/success-stories/sugar-and-justin Join our free newsletter database by signing up here:  www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact Follow us on Instagram at @smartdatingacademy Schedule your consultation with us here!   We are on a waiting list, and would love to help you!  https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

What is Quantum Love?  It's a concept created by today's amazing guest, Dr. Laura Berman.   Listen to EVERY word, because it will take your breath away, and teach you how to ATTRACT the most amazing love into your life: Quantum love is the ideal combination of exciting and safe love - the type we ALL desire.   Dr. Berman tells us: 1) How she got into this work? 2) How she created the concept of Quantum love, and the INSTANT results she saw with Ethan 3) How to think about the type of love you want, which is how you want to FEEL 4) How to ground yourself to get into 'the zone' (Bela asks her to guide you through EXACTLY how to do this) 5) Why it's an amazing way to attract likeminded people to you 6) How to manifest the perfect mate 7) Why Quantum love is the basis for the "Law of Attraction" (ie, it's the "Secret of THE Secret") You will feel yourself shifting from shame/guilt to peace/safety during this episode.  I'm SO excited to hear what you think! Dr. Laura Berman is a therapist specializing in sex, love and relationships.  She's a best-selling author of nine books, and an award-winning radio and TV host.  She's starred in and hosted four TV series on OWN, Showtime, and Discovery Health, and is a regular guest expert on daytime news outlets.  Dr. Berman is also the host of The Language of Love, a podcast focusing on love, sex & relationships from a mind, body and spirit perspective.    Link to her love quiz:  https.//drlauraberman.com/quiz Link to her book, Quantum Love: 

Want to make your face gorgeous and glowy all summer long?  Listen to this episode with Enisa, Smart Dating Academy's chief hair/makeup guru!   You can use these tips today and ALWAYS -- even in the dead of winter when you're going on vacation to somewhere warm!   And, if you like this episode, a link to MORE is below! Here are some of the gems you'll hear: "Good Makeup starts with good skin!"   How do you 'prep your skin' for this time of year to make it GLOW? What's Enisa's biggest secret to anti-aging? What's the difference between BB and CC cream?  Enisa thinks everyone knows this - but Bela had to ask for clarification!! Why you may need two shades of foundation (oohhhh)... The best way to achieve a unified look -- and what Bela learned about having it 'dry' vs. 'wet!' The best way to keep a light 'berry lip' for the summer And, the most important thing to have it all stay in place (and wait for it because she spills the beans on her FAVORITE product here)! Listen to the WHOLE episode and you'll have tips to glow up!! And, if you liked the episode, here is the Makeup Webinar that has been invested in by hundreds of people!   (learning HOW to apply, live with Bela & Enisa showing you how, and their FAVORITE products), click here!   You'll learn how EXACTLY to apply your skin prep, foundation, concealer, eye shadow, liner, mascara, contouring, and giving yourself an "eye lift" with a trick!!!   And, we will email you a detailed product list of EVERY product we used.  This webinar has blown people away!    https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/webinars Follow us on Instagram for free tips 2x/day @smartdatingacademy  And, subscribe to our FREE newsletter at https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact

In honor of Independence Day, I'm so excited to share my own 7 tips with you about how to appear more attractive and INDEPENDENT on your dates, and in relationships!   These are things I practice in my own life, and I know that you'll learn some new things here, and be able to EXECUTE them as well!    1) Create a life for yourself that you love, and talk about the things that you love to do.   2) Start traveling & doing things on your own -- go on trips alone, go to restaurants alone, museums, all of the things!  you can be your own best company! 3) Learn to recognize and deal with your own emotions!  Don't expect someone to mind read and always do the right thing.    4) Have friends outside of your relationship!   And spend time with them!   5) Develop a hobby of your own that you are passionate about!   And immerse yourself in it, and talk about it!    6) Learn to be interdependent not co-dependent!     7) When you're in a relationship, realize that your relationship can't be EVERYTHING for you!   You'll put too much pressure on the relationship, and too much pressure on the other person   Spend some time thinking about the other things in your life besides your relationship that are important to you, and start to take action on that!    If you want to book a 'mock date' practice session with us, or need any kind of coaching, go to  www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact If you want to hear more from us, subscribe to our newsletter (www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact), or follow us TODAY on Instagram (@smartdatingacademy)

Dating anxiety is something even the best daters can feel sometimes.  What are some easy ways to help diminish the anxiety, so we can present the best / most authentic version of ourselves?  I called on my colleague Ilene Collins, dating coach extraordinare at Smart Dating Academy, to discuss this.  She's got a great background in mental health coaching as well, and this conversation was amazing.   You'll learn: How to stay in the PRESENT moment (if you have anxiety, you're living in the past or catastrophizing the future).  Ilene shares her favorite, easy ways to bring you "BACK" to this moment.   Why getting active before a date can REALLY help (I share my Peloton hack) How is your messaging to self (Cheerleader or judge?) BEST self care and dating routine (spa, fav music, candles) If you're feeling anxious on a date, are you REALLY listening to the other person?  We talk in depth about this.   Why "listening to understand" is SO important, and helps immensely with anxiety Why the video date is AWESOME to do before a 'real' date - and how to use it to lower fears HOW to get prepared - prepare for a date like you would a job interview!  What questions give you anxiety? Role play with a friend, or do a session with us! If you want to book a 'mock date' practice session with us, or need any kind of coaching, go to  www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact If you want to hear more from us, subscribe to our newsletter (www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact), or follow us TODAY on Instagram (@smartdatingacademy)

Dr. Terri Orbuch is a renowned love researcher.  During this episode, she and Bela have an incredible chat that spans the biggest reasons for divorce, what makes for the happiest relationships, love vs. lust (how to tell which it is), and how to know if someone is 'the one.'   You will hear about:    Dr. Terri's NIH research project that has been following the same couples for over 30 years (how many couples divorced, and how many of them found love again - and this is super inspiring)! What is the #1 factor that leads singles to find love? What are some additional ways that singles can improve their odds of finding love – based on science? How does someone know if a relationship is the right one? The 4 keys ways to distinguish lust vs. love Why 'picking your battles' is usually the wrong strategy Why conflict is so important (what happened to the 12 couples that reported NO conflict) What you should do EVERY MORNING with your partner to maintain love (and it's not sex, lol) Your new book is called “Secrets to Surviving Your Children’s Love Relationships.” Briefly – what is it about? What motivated you to write it? How to get over the HURT of infidelity or relationship trauma --  What conversations are most important for parents to have with their children? This episode is one you will want to listen to again, and again and again.   We certainly are! If you'd like to get our free newsletter, sign up at www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact If you don't already, follow us on Instagram, where we have GREAT videos and reels of the podcast segments!  Follow @smartdatingacademy  If you'd like to schedule a consultation, sign up https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela BIO:  Dr. Terri Orbuch (aka The Love Doctor®) is a world-renowned relationship expert, author, speaker, therapist and relationship coach, Distinguished Professor at Oakland University, Research Professor at University of Michigan Institute for Social Research, and media personality. She is also the director of a landmark study, funded by the National Institutes of Health (NIH), where she has been following the same couples for over 3 decades. Dr. Orbuch is widely published in scientific journals and the author of “5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage From Good to Great.” and “Finding Love Again: 6 Simple Steps to a New and Happy Relationship.” Her latest book, “Secrets to Surviving Your Children’s Love Relationships” was published in March 2022. Dr. Orbuch has been featured in such publications as, The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Reader’s Digest, USA Today, Women’s Health, Cosmopolitan, and TIME magazine and has appeared on The Today Show, MSNBC, The Katie Couric Show, ESPN, HuffPost Live, and CNN. Her TEDx talk has over 2.8 million views.  For more information, please go to: DrTerriTheLoveDoctor.com.

Andrea Javor is just like you in so many ways.  She's beautiful, smart and successful (works in marketing AND as a divorce coach).  Andrea, like so many of us, had a broken picker.   Her parents are wonderful, and she's surrounded by love, but healthy romantic love had always eluded her.   She was divorced twice before she 'fixed her picker' and found love with Jason.  Listen to this sweet story, and you'll not only be inspired, but pick up LOTS of nuggets that she drops for you!   We will discuss: -- The message that Andrea wished she got from her parents while growing up -- Why she thought her first husband was IT, and how that QUICKLY unraveled. --How she embarked on a BIG self-healing and learning journey, and found so much love within herself... --How the years of therapy didn't fix her picker (oy) --What happened in her second marriage?  Why was it worse than the first? --When she knew she had to do something different --What she learned about HERSELF during date coaching -- and the root of her dating issues (spoiler alert--anxiety)... --How she did NOT settle, and how her man is "old-school normal" and awesome --How she met 'the one' and how we know this one is a KEEPER! She is incredibly happy, and I love sharing these stories of hope with YOU.  Please know that your time will COME to find love.  Remember, no matter who you are, if you want it, love will come to YOU! It's a when, not an IF! If you'd like to get our free newsletter, sign up at www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact If you don't already, follow us on Instagram, where we have GREAT videos and reels of the podcast segments!  Follow @smartdatingacademy  If you'd like to schedule a consultation, sign up https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela

Weight gain is something most of us have struggled with, or will struggle with at some point in our lives - whether we are male or female.   Is it just me, or does it seems harder with each year to keep it off?   In this episode, I chat with one of the most renowned physicians in the US, Dr. Lauren Streicher about why we gain weight (especially in mid-life & menopause), and HOW to get rid of it in a healthy way.   We are all beautiful as we are, and it is NOT necessary to have six pack abs or be a size 2 to find love.  What this episode will tell you is how to get to the BEST and healthiest version of you, because how you feel impacts everything relationship you're in (especially if you're dating or in a romantic one).   Here are just some of the topics we covered: 1) How does metabolism change throughout life?  This answer blew my mind, btw! 2) Why sleep is MORE important than ever in the 'battle of the bulge.' 3) Where the "muffin top" comes from, and why... 4) What men REALLY think about our thighs, butts, and cellulite (it's hilarious)... 5) What's the WORST type of fat to gain and why? 6) A great substitute for a date that keeps you healthy and happy! 7) How you can manage 'drinking' calories in a better way (I have started to do this, and it's magical)! 8) What you should offer to bring to a party and WHY it benefits you 9) Lauren's FAVORITE book for weight loss (listen to find out) If you loved this episode, please give it a review - we LOVE LOVE LOVE reading them, and if we can figure out who you are, we will send you a personal note back (you can email us through our website about your review at www.smartdatingacademy.com) If you're READY to find LOVE, schedule a consultation with us at www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact If you want more FREE tips, follow us on Instagram @smartdatingacademy   Bio:  Dr. Lauren Streicher is a top gynecologist, professor at Northwestern University, author of multiple books about women's health, and the host of the podcast "Dr. Streicher's Insider Info - The Menopause Podcast." Subscribe and Follow Dr. Streicher on  DrStreicher.com Instagram​@DrStreich Twitter​@DrStreicher Facebook​ @DrStreicher YouTube​ DrStreicherTV Books by Lauren Streicher, MD Hot Flash Hell: A Gynecologist's Guide to Turning Down the Heat Sex Rx- Hormones , Health, and Your Best Sex Ever The Essential Guide to Hysterectomy

What is Love Bombing vs. Love Seeking, and How Can You Take Control? In this amazingly informative episode, Bela and Dr. Katherine Helm discuss the VAST differences between a Love Bomber (bad) and a Love Seeker (good).  They address the following questions in depth: 1) What is love bombing? 2) Why is love bombing harmful? 3) What is the difference between a love bomber and someone who is romantic (a love seeker)? 4) What's the KEY step to know the difference between the two types? 5) What do love bombers want from you? 6) How do you know if you’ve been love bombed? 7) What should you do if you are in a relationship with a love bomber?  What signs existed in Netflix's Tinder Swindler?    8) What should healthy boundaries look like regarding romantic gestures early in a relationship? You will not be confused anymore after you hear this episode between a bomber and a seeker, and you'll know EXACTLY how to TAKE CONTROL of the situation!    BIO: Katherine Helm, PhD is a Professor of Psychology and Director of Graduate Programs in Counseling at Lewis University, Romeoville, IL.  She is also a practicing psychologist in part-time private where she sees individuals and couples.  Katherine has authored several publications about racial and cultural issues in mental health, couples’ issues, and pedagogy in multicultural courses and has an extensive background facilitating counselor trainings.  Katherine has had several media appearances on radio and video and is a TEDx speaker. She is a sought-after author, presenter, public speaker, professional trainer, and clinical supervisor.   If you love this episode, please rate, review and SHARE!! If you are INSPIRED to seek help with you love life, sign up for our newsletter at www.smartdatingacademy.com/contact  If you are REALLY INSPIRED to make changes, schedule a 1 hour consultation with Bela!   https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/11-coaching/coaching-call-with-bela