Money For Couples with Ramit Sethi

Ramit Sethi
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Dec 14, 2021 • 47min

22. “I’m quitting my job, but I’m worried my husband doesn't support me”

Alexandra and Brandon have a household income of $135,000. Alex just handed in her one week’s notice, but she still has financial needs, and she’s scared to broach the subject of spending money on herself with her husband.As we talk, it becomes apparent that self-agency has been absent from other aspects of their lives. From their relationship to career choices, both have been playing by everyone else’s rulebook but their own. These conversations have been on the back burner for long enough—it’s time to get candid. Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.
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7 snips
Dec 7, 2021 • 54min

21. Part 2: “I want to trust my wife with our money, but what if she blows everything?”

This is part two with Charles and Michelle. He has a net worth of well over $10 million but still uses someone else’s Netflix password. After 21 years, Michelle has reached her limit with his relentless cheapness.Charles is trying to rewrite his internal money story, but after years of playing the “I’m not the kind of guy who blows money on X, Y, Z,” card, he still worries about extreme what-if scenarios, driving Michelle to consider divorce.As you listen, think about the areas you’re afraid to spend money on. Ask yourself what your worry-free number is.Now, let’s try to get Charles and Michelle to meet halfway. Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.
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Nov 30, 2021 • 48min

20. “My wife is going to divorce me unless I can stop being so cheap”

Charles and his wife, Michelle, are worth $10 million, and he earns over $2 million a year--but he’s cheap. So cheap, he still insists on sharing someone else’s Netflix password. Michelle has been pushed to the limit. Divorce is on the cards unless things change. She wants to start with landscaping the backyard, but I want to investigate the roots of this invisible script that’s costing him his marriage. There’s 21 years’ worth of scar tissue to heal here. Let’s dig in. Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.
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Nov 23, 2021 • 48min

19. “My husband has been promising that we’ll buy a house in a few months… for five years”

Brian is a struggling tech entrepreneur and relies on his wife, Serena, a physician with a stable income of $235,000, to support his family. Serena wants Brian to get a job and admit that his start-up isn’t working. She's extremely focused — perhaps too focused — on buying a house.Brian doesn't like saying “No” to Serena, so he evades questions and promises that everything will change "4-6 months from now," but after seven years, Serena's patience is running thin. Can you spot the red flags? Listen to the resentment and distrust in her voice. Brian's promises to get a job and turn things around are falling flat. What's worse is that he can't even see it. I'm not going to sugarcoat it; it's heartbreaking to watch a seemingly successful couple totally disconnected from each other. I'm determined to get them on the same page. Tune in to see how their story unfolds. We started the conversation focusing on Serena’s dream to buy a house sooner rather than later, but it becomes apparent that the house is a distraction from the deeper desire to have a partner on the same page as her. Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.
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7 snips
Nov 16, 2021 • 51min

18. "He's the man & he should pay. We can't go on like this any more"

Monique expects Pablo to pay for her “as the man” in the relationship. Pablo wants “fairness” in a partner.Last week, I dug into their money psychology. Right at the end of last week’s conversation -- when both were feeling good -- they started discussing an upcoming trip to Mexico City. Suddenly, everything fell apart.All their positive feelings and new skills got thrown to the side, and they went right back to their old habits.That’s why I had to add a part two to our conversation. That’s today’s episode.When they’re discussing the trip, Monique already has her argument ready before Pablo finishes a sentence. Pablo’s fists are clenched. He wants to be the laid-back, confident guy Monique fell in love with, but his views on money have changed. You’ll hear him describe “Antonio,” his scarcity-minded alter ego.This conversation surprised me in so many ways. Listen in.Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.
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Nov 9, 2021 • 53min

17. “I think he should pay for everything because he’s the man”

Monique is very open with what she wants in a relationship. “I always expected that fairytale love, the guy pays for everything, the guy opens the door, the guy waits to kiss me at the end of the night...”But her boyfriend, Pablo, disagrees. He feels taken advantage of. He shares the story of Monique ordering a $10 soup in a restaurant when he wasn’t even eating, then both of them staring at the bill to see who would pay for it.Their beliefs come from their upbringing and very specific personal experiences. For Monique, she believes Pablo should pay because of how she was raised. At one point, she says it’s his job to pursue her. Pablo wants to split things “fairly” down the middle, saying he wants a “partner.”Their opposing money lenses lead to awkward exchanges at restaurants when the check arrives. For Monique, him paying for a $10 soup is symbolic of being “taken care of.” Pablo doesn’t think it’s fair. He says he would prefer she did the “fake check dance” before he steps up to “be the gentleman.”How many invisible scripts can you spot? What does your reaction to the situation say about your relationship with money?  I walked into this episode pretty confident about what would happen. I was wrong.Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.
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Nov 2, 2021 • 53min

16. “We’re worth $8 million but I comparison shop for strawberries”

When Chris shops for food online, he compares the cost of almond milk and strawberries to save a few dollars. He spends hours agonizing over the most economical flight routes. He even stopped and picked up a used stroller from someone’s driveway.Chris and his wife Amy have a net worth of $8 million.Their friends call them cheap. They prefer to identify as "money hackers” and have lots of reasons why they behave the way they do. But even with their explanations, they’re not happy with how they’re using money to live a Rich Life.Chris and Amy are optimizers. They optimize points and options, a normal part of the tech culture in which they work. There’s just one problem: It’s making them unhappy!Imagine a world where Chris and Amy didn't have to put price first. Imagine a scenario where they could start with the kind of magical experience they wanted to create -- and use money to make it happen.As you listen, it’s easy to roll your eyes at the amounts of money being discussed. Resist that temptation. Amy and Chris have given us a gift by being so open with their finances and their challenges. I love today's episode because it shows you that if you have money issues today, It's very likely you're going to have the exact same money issues later at a million dollars or 5 million or yes, $8 million.Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.
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Oct 26, 2021 • 50min

15. “I have a $1 million trust fund and I’m scared to spend money on food”

Andy and Kate bring in $200,000 a year and live rent free. Andy feels bad about money every day. His partner, Kate, says she wants to work as a financial team, but she walks on eggshells. Andy wants to make her happy, but he has a poor relationship with money.And that’s not all. Andy has $1.1 million dollars in a trust fund, managed by a financial advisor, and he still has holes in his shoes. I asked them, “Do you want to turn 65, have $10 million, and still worry about getting dessert?”Andy will have to decide if he’s going to let his old money stories determine the next 50 years of his life. Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.
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Oct 19, 2021 • 44min

14. “I hide my spending from my husband”

Meet Chuck and Mary. With a household income of $450,000 a year, they’re wealthy, but they’re not living A Rich Life. Mary spends money--in secret -- and feels judged when she makes “frivolous” designer bag purchases. Meanwhile, Chuck feels he can’t invest in a personal trainer. Their backstory is revealing.Mary grew up in a large family in Argentina where a bottle of Coca-Cola was an indulgence. When she made it to the States, she never wanted to feel deprived again. Suddenly, her spending takes on a new dimension. To her, a Chanel bag is more than just a bag.They have the money, yet they lack a shared plan. To create a Rich Life, they’ll have to dig into each other’s money clues.Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.
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Oct 12, 2021 • 51min

13. “I’m dumb with money and he’s making me feel worse”

A few years ago, Adam spent nine months aggressively paying off $75,000 in debt. He loved it. It gave him a purpose and he was happy to work seven days a week to pay it off quickly.His girlfriend, Elizabeth, has debt, but she isn’t excited by paying it off. Instead, she feels trapped, describing herself as “dumb” with money. (Notice the words she uses to describe herself and her debt: “disgusting,” “bad,” and “stupid.”)Adam’s aggressive approach of constantly talking about money isn’t working. Even though he wants to help, she craves emotional security and support. At one point, as Adam is about to go into yet another long monologue, I cut him off. Sometimes, what worked for you doesn’t work for your partner. Listen in to hear how Adam and Elizabeth navigate their Rich Life.Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.Produced by Crate Media.

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