Mastermind Parenting Podcast

Welcome to the last episode of our series about Bullying, Boundaries and Back-to-School. We haven't talked about any back-to-school typical things, like this is how to set up your binders and this is how to make sure your kids do all their summer work. Anyway, this month we have been following through some of these posts by this woman that I've been calling Marie, who has been posting about her strong-willed children.  And we feel bad for Marie and many of us identify with aspects of Marie. We want to love Marie up. We want to help Marie and I really want to just say to Marie, you know what, it's not your fault. And I wish I could make it all better. The fixer in me is strong.  This last episode of this series, which is called “When Your Co-Parent is the Problem,” which is what Marie really believes. And you'll see in some of her posts why she believes that. The root of the problem is we've got a mom and a dad, and it sounds like there's a lot of tension and a lack of communication between them. And they're setting the tone for the household and the kids, these strong-willed kids who aren't respecting boundaries. Well, it sounds like Dad's not respecting Mom's boundaries. It sounds like there's a lack of boundaries across the board. There's a real breakdown in this family structure. And these kids are just holding up a mirror saying you can focus on our behavior, our misbehavior, but what we're really trying to do is to alert you guys, that this family dynamic isn't working for anyone. So, Mom, you want to do something? You're going to have to start holding people accountable. What might that mean? Listen to this episode as we unpack this situation and provide a few tips to help some of you work through this if it’s a part of your parenting world. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links You’re invited to the FREE Weekend Warm-up Coaching call: https://mastermindparenting.com/weekend/ Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting  

This seems like an appropriate conversation for episode 200. Again, we are talking this month about Bullying, Boundaries, and Back-to-School. And I think that hopefully you understand that my point with back-to-school is way more than making sure your kids have the right school supplies. If you want to prepare your kids for back-to-school, the best thing in the world you could do is dig into boundaries, badgering, behavior, accountability, and getting to the root of the real source of the misbehaviors and the lack of peace in your household. That's the greatest thing you can do, because having structures in place and communicating with your kids, what's okay with you, what's not okay with you when they don't follow the rules. These are the “oops day rules” and this will help your brain remember. Again, we’re unpacking some posts from social media. Our mom who is looking for the perfect consequence that will “work,” that will actually matter to her kids doesn’t understand that’s not what consequences are about. Consequences are about cause and effect, they are about teaching people. Listen in today if you feel boundaries and consequences are eluding you as well, and you may find some tips that can help you find a little less struggle, and more peace in your world.  As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links You’re invited to the FREE Weekend Warm-up Coaching call: https://mastermindparenting.com/weekend/ Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

Welcome to this episode. We are still going to be continuing with our theme of Bullying, Boundaries, and Back-to-School. The title is The Kid Just Won’t… and I'm going to continue reading some social posts from a mom seeking tips for a strong-willed four-year-old who won't cooperate. We’ve all been there, right? When your child refuses to do what you want them to do. And it tends to escalate, and they become stubborn, and it grows into a big deal when you just want them to pick up some toys. Listen to this episode and learn how to keep your kiddo accountable, while making sure you stay calm and don’t freak out. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links You’re invited to the FREE Weekend Warm-up Coaching call: https://mastermindparenting.com/weekend/ Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting  

We are going to continue with our lovely theme of bullying and boundaries and all things back to school. I know these are not fun topics. I've been working with some different parents, and I just feel like it seems that when things really seem to go south, most of these parents are kicking themselves, and blaming themselves. And they feel like there were lots of warning signs and they put their heads in the sand. I always have only compassion and never judgment. I know it's an impossible position to be in. And I just feel like with so many of our strong-willed kids, I think there’s a deep-rooted fear that if this is what this looks like at eight or at 10, or if this is how they're behaving towards a sibling, or towards the family members, how are they going to be out in the world? And what's it going to look like when they're 14 and 16 and 19?  I think just so many parents of kids that are struggling and not doing well or showing up with aggressive, mean behaviors that would get them punished, these are the kids that quite often fall through the cracks. Because even these kids that, you know, even when it's your kid, like you love them, but quite often they're hard to like. So, it's a really tricky position to be in when you are deep-down worried, wondering what if one day my kid harms themselves or someone else or both. My ultimate goal is to help these kids. Because when you help these kids, guess what happens? They don't show up with bullying behaviors. They start to feel better. And when they start to feel better, they start to do better. Today’s episode is focused on when kids just refuse to stop some of these behaviors and strategies you can employ to help them.  As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links You’re invited to the FREE Weekend Warm-up Coaching call: https://mastermindparenting.com/weekend/ Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

Our theme for the rest of the month is Bullies, Boundaries, and Back-to-School and I have something kind of fun in store. I'm going to feature social media posts from my Strong-Willed Kids group, which are parents of strong-willed kids. And there's maybe 5,000 people in this group, and sometimes I'll into the group, and I'll just read posts by the parents. Because I just want to see what people are struggling with currently. I've read scenarios here before, and for the next several episodes I’ll be reading more, unpacking them, and sharing some tips. We’re starting off the series with a huge topic, one we hear a lot about, especially as kids go back to school. Bullying and Badgering. So, in this episode I’m going to feature some posts, help define bullying and badgering, and then I’ll talk about how to approach the behaviors when they show up in our kids. So much of Mastermind Parenting is digging into the core reasons why these behaviors are appearing, understanding why, then using strategies to help encourage different behaviors. It’s important to get to the root first, then we can clean and bandage things appropriately. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links You’re invited to the FREE Weekend Warm-up Coaching call: https://mastermindparenting.com/weekend/ Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

I have somebody special on the podcast this week. Her name is Allie Danziger, and she has a heartfelt passion for helping ambitious people succeed. In 2009, Allie started one of Texas's top marketing agencies. And let me just say this as y'all will hear in the episode, she was all of 24 years old. She is very hard working, and she loves what she does. Allie also really cares about being an amazing mom and sister and wife and friend and daughter. I find her story to be extremely inspirational and I'm having her on the show because she's really filling a gap for those of us who are worried about our teens and young adults actually being able to make it out in the real world. Allie's newest venture Ampersand was started in 2020 and applies the 10,000 hours of lessons she learned in hiring, managing and mentoring entry level employees and interns, and a career readiness and internship matching platform. She compares it to a dating app, like Bumble. Ampersand takes interns and teaches them basic skills and then matches them with companies through their unique career readiness and internship matching platform. In the last year, Ampersand has trained 7,000 young professionals and placed over 450 internships around the country in a variety of companies and industries. Allie aims to democratize access to internship, placements and internships while simultaneously helping companies of all sizes build a pipeline of talented, driven, and diverse talent. This is a very, very cool company that she has started. And I mean, I could take some lessons, many lessons from this young mom / whipper snapper, who just knows how to get some sh*t done. She's really impressive. I think you guys will love learning from her and hearing what she's got going on. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Allie Danziger Allie has a passion for helping ambitious people succeed. Allie started, and later sold, one of Texas' top marketing agencies, Integrate Agency, where she was lucky enough to work with, and learn from, some of the most talented innovators, designers, thinkers and doers she had ever met; the chance to lead a company that has generated over $15MM in total revenue, employed over 150 people, and helped over 600 clients grow. Allie’s new venture, Ampersand, applies her >10,000 hours of lessons learned in hiring, managing and mentoring so many employees and interns in my 12 years running Integrate. She is now dedicating her time to eliminating the skills gap from higher education to employment, and democratizing access to internship placement and mentorship, while also helping companies run successful internship programs. Gain exclusive access to Ampersand's Career Preparation bootcamp: https://www.ampersandpro.com/careerprep Allie’s Web and Social Links Website: https://www.ampersandpro.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AmpersandProfessionals/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ampersand_pro/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/ampersand-professionals TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ampersand_pro About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

We are going back to an episode where I really talk about what I think high sensitivity means to me. I read the book The Highly Sensitive Child by Elaine Aron and I've read many articles and I've studied this for a while. The acronym is HSP for highly sensitive person. I know many people are familiar with it these days. I just thought it would be helpful because I refer to HSP quite often. And so if you have heard this term, or maybe you haven't heard this term, and you're curious about it, listen to this short and sweet episode where I talk about it and what I think that it means.  I think that many people who have kids that are challenging, who challenge us, who call us to more, who a lot of people say are strong willed. And I think me bringing this to you guys again, is that I want y'all to really think about the questions, “Am I a highly sensitive person? Is my child a highly sensitive person?” This is just all about self-awareness because I think that the main thing that needs to change in our culture is we need to stop thinking that there's something wrong with our kids and that they need to be fixed. Right? You didn't get a difficult child, you got a human one and there's never going to be one human being exactly like another, even identical twins. They are not exactly alike. Like we are humans. We are human four-leaf clovers. I think we have to start thinking about our kids as the little humans that they are, and it's our job to understand them, to understand when they're challenging us, all behaviors, communication, and we have to play investigator and, and, and help them help them do better. Help them feel better. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links You’re invited to the FREE Weekend Warm-up Coaching call: https://mastermindparenting.com/weekend/ Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When The World Overwhelms Them by Elaine N. Aron Ph.D.: https://www.amazon.com/Highly-Sensitive-Child-Children-Overwhelms/dp/0767908724/

Welcome to this episode with Christina Furnival, a San Diego based wife, mom to two young children, licensed psychotherapist, writer and children's book author. Christina has over a decade of experience in the mental health field and she's helped countless families work through anxiety, depression, behavior challenges, and big life changes.  Christina uses her personal and professional experience in her articles and books to support adults and children around the world. Christina's passionate about supporting parents and children to understand themselves better navigate challenges with confidence and live the life that they want. And today she is joining me to talk about her latest book, Fear Not: How to Face Your Fear and Anxiety Head On. We’re covering some topics that can be difficult to talk to your kiddos about and how to have these hard conversations. Christina’s books are wonderful conversation starters, and she provides excellent talking points to help guide you along the way. I just love these books and know you would too. Listen in to our chat and learn how to tackle your own anxiety around these conversations and other areas in your parenting life. Plenty of golden nuggets here, so enjoy! As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Christina Furnival Christina is a mom of two, wife, mental health therapist, writer, public speaker, and children's book author. Like every mama, she is constantly juggling all the things. By day, she stay-at-home parents her pretty spectacular and equally exhausting young kids while attempting to work on her social-emotional children’s book series and to write for her blog Real Life Mama and other highly regarded publications. And by night (well, evening, really) via telehealth, Christina is a practicing licensed mental health therapist. And of course she tries to make time for her marriage, and for herself, but it’s not always easy. Even with her background in mental health, Christina is often overcome by how challenging motherhood and life can be. She is a work in progress, and feels the pains that you do, which is why she cares so deeply about supporting others through all the ups and downs they experience. We all can use a hand every now and again. When not working, Christina can be found singing loudly, crafting inconsistently, cooking and baking, exercising, going to the beach (her happy place), and having wild dance parties with her family in the living room. Christina’s Web and Social Links Website: https://christinafurnival.com/ The Capable Kiddos book series: https://christinafurnival.com/books/ About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links When you need to have a hard conversation with your kids, use the FREE cheat sheet and audio training: https://mastermindparenting.com/productive-conversation/ Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

I just celebrated my daughter's 21st birthday. We're out in San Diego because she is doing some internships here and we decided to relocate to California for a while. So, I've been working from here. And I have been with my daughter a lot lately. She goes to school in Santa Barbara and we went back to Santa Barbara last weekend to celebrate her birthday and have a whole special weekend. We had a lot of time on the road together, and over the weekend we were processing what is happening in our country right now. It was interesting to be around her, and she's also moving into a house in Santa Barbara with several other young, smart women. There were a bunch of different birthday things that they did for her this weekend, and we all celebrated together. So, they're all just beside themselves, understandably with this overturn of Roe v. Wade. I think just so many of us are just in shock and disbelief and grief. And in the coaching world, we’re in what we call the goo, which is anytime we're going through an identity shift, meaning we're not who we were before. I learned to look at this identity shift In terms of comparing the human to the butterfly. When the caterpillar becomes a butterfly, the caterpillar goes into the chrysalis and then eventually it comes out a totally different animal. And when it goes into the chrysalis, it dissolves, and it becomes like caterpillar soup. And then all the cells within that organism restructure and turn into an entirely new organism. And so the caterpillar becomes a butterfly. And anytime we go through an identity shift, which is, who I was before is not who I am or who I'm becoming, we all kind of become person soup. We become person “goo” for a while, and this happens all throughout our lives. So, with this episode I’m unpacking my thoughts and feelings around this transition, and those of others I’ve been talking to, like my daughter, her friends, parents, and others. This is impacting multiple generations. I understand that many of us are grieving, and sometimes anger is a part of the grieving process. But so often I think people just get stuck there. Let's use the anger to mobilize ourselves. Let's use the anger to strategize. Let's use the anger to step out of the privilege that me and many other people have known, which is our bodies, our business. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

Here is another conversation that I had with one of the moms in my Mastermind Parenting community. I was doing these live sessions, these live report card sessions, where we were just assessing where you were, where you are, where you're going. It's a big part of the process that involves changing behaviors, right? We can't expect our kids to change their behaviors if we're not changing our behaviors. When you have a kid that presents as “strong-willed,” quite often they may just be feeling misunderstood. They also frequently get misdiagnosed. This mom, she's here with me in the mastermind community, she says she's improved in terms of yelling by 90% now. No one ever signs up and says, “I'm a yeller.”  There's so much shame when we yell at our kids and yet we're human. And when you have a child that you don't know how to help do better, quite often, you lose your mind too. And so, then you just have like two people sort of losing their minds and it's just not helpful, right? Like nothing changes.  This mom has gone through our beginning program, basic bootcamp. For those of you who've been listening to the podcast for a while, we do have a group enrolling starting in a couple of couple days from when this episode is originally airing. Listen to this episode and learn how this mom’s parenting skills, and her husband’s, have improved so she no longer labels herself a “yeller!” As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Join our next 12-week VIP Parenting Program: https://mastermindparenting.com/basics-bootcamp Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting