Kuldrin's Krypt A BDSM 101 Podcast

Recorded: 3/9/2019 and 5/12/2019 / Published: 6/17/2019PatreonWelcome to Kuldrin’s Krypt I’m your host Master Kuldrin. If you are new to the show I use my 24 years of BDSM experience and 20 working the psychology field to dispel myths, get rid of stereotypes, and answer your questions about BDSM. You can call in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.comOn this episode: 1: The Rules to Love By2: Continuing with our interview series from DomCon, LA 2019: A: Ashley from The Crafty Hedonist https://www.etsy.com/shop/TheCraftyHedonist B: Chris from Torrid Timber http://www.torridtimber.com/Rules to Love by:1: Safe, sane, consensual, and informed2: KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity3: “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul YoungAshley from The Crafty Hedonist[1:35] Ashley from The Crafty Hedonist https://www.etsy.com/shop/TheCraftyHedonist[2:00] How did you come up with this idea and what did you go to school for?http://www.barsinister.net[2:25] What made you decide to get into the toy business? [3:34] What all products do you make?[4:32] How did making adult toys a passion for an artist?[5:37] Do you “test drive” every product?[7:02] How do you care for The Crafty Hedonist products?[8:42] Upcoming pieces? Do you do custom pieces?Chris from Torrid Timber[10:05] Chris from Torrid Timber http://www.torridtimber.com/You don’t Master DomCon. It Masters you. [11:16] What does Torrid Timber do?[11:54] How do your toys play into your kinks? How long have you been in the kink scene?[13:15] Is that a cage and can I get in it? [13:38] How does Chris prepare to design equipment?[17:36] Right brain/left brain balance in design.[18:48] “Hey we had an amazing scene and this thing added to it.”[19:14] What is your participation in the scene, Dom or sub?[19:30] Apologizing, ownership, control, and leading by example.[21:33] Do you try out all your own creations? Building from a users point of view, not a personal preference.[24:02] Inclusivity. Kneeling for her Master for the first time in ten years!Show notes can be found at https://kuldrinskrypt.com/220 Thank you: Show Producers:Pro Producer($100/month): LilyxChaosx. Executive Producers ($25/month): Jeremiah, ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia, Feline_Rouge, babylove2269, and FaisilSr. Producers ($10/month): Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx, JayKay, SortOutTheKinks, Delilah, SirMutualRespect and Master Gabriel.Producers ($5/month): Kainsin, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, Roxiebear, olive_eyes, Seine (Zine), and AlexandriaJr. Producers ($1/month): K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, LxSoumis, Hayley, and Morgan. If you would like to become one of our show producers go to our website, https://kuldrinskrypt.com/support to get that information.BDSM Contracts for their donation of their beautiful 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts.. http://bdsmcontracts.org coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.Day Collars is a place for personalized handmade collars, leashes, cuffs and belts. https://www.daycollars.comWhipping Stripes: http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys. Next Time on the Krypt:Susan Wright from the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom https://NCSFreedom.orgContact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: masterkuldrin https://www.instagram.com/masterkuldrin/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinhttp://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresourceLimits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey

Recorded: 3/9/2019 and 5/12/2019 / Published: 6/10/2019PatreonCall in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.comOn this episode of the Krypt, we are hitting the rules to love by, then we are continuing with our interview series from DomCon, LA 2019. This time it is Professional Dom and Rope Master, Master Feenix. After that, I have a lost interview I did at Podfest 2019 in Orlando, FL. with Keri where she talks about her three biggest kinks and how she entered the world of kink. https://Patreon.com/Kuldrinskrypt Rules to Love by:1: Safe, sane, consensual, and informed2: KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity3: “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young[1:35] Master Feenix https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/masterfeenix/[2:00] How long have you been in the kink scene?http://www.barsinister.net[2:32] What is about rope that drew you in?What?!?! You started out as a rope hater?!?!?!Midori http://planetmidori.com https://www.youtube.com/user/PlanetMidori/videos [6:14] How deep does your love of rope run?[13:01] What types of ties do you do? Tying on a spanking bench?[15:40] You tie newbies with a 60-second questionnaire? What’s included in this?What kind of rope do you use?[19:55] How do you avoid consent complaints with such a quick negotiation?[28:57] Rope bottom KeriHow long have you been in the scene and how did you get involved?[29:58] Were you seeing the therapist for personal or professional reasons?Professional? Oh, you are a Doctor of Oriental Medicine.[30:35] What are your “three number one kinks”?[31:11] What about bondage does it for you?[32:28] Before entering the lifestyle, did you ever cocoon or use weighted blankets to deal with stress or anxiety?[30:22] What do you wish you would have known before you got started?[35:30] Did you hit frenzy?Show notes can be found at https://kuldrinskrypt.com/219 Thank you: Show Producers:Pro Producer($100/month): Anonymous. Executive Producers ($25/month): Jeremiah, Jess, ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia, Feline_Rouge, babylove2269, and FaisilSr. Producers ($10/month): Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx, JayKay, Queen Sage, SortOutTheKinks, Delilah, SirMurualRespect and Master Gabriel.Producers ($5/month): Kainsin, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, Roxiebear, olive_eyes, Seine (Zine), and AlexandriaJr. Producers ($1/month): K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, LxSoumis, and Hayley. If you would like to become one of our show producers go to our website, https://kuldrinskrypt.com/support to get that information.BDSM Contracts for their donation of their beautiful 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts.. http://bdsmcontracts.org coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.https://www.daycollars.comDay Collars is a place for personalized handmade collars, leashes, cuffs and belts.http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys. Next Time on the Krypt:We are talking to ???. In the meantime go to https://kuldrinskrypt.com for show notes, how to subscribe information, and the link to Fetlife group so you can take part in the conversation and be eligible for giveaways. While you’re there click on support us to become a Patreon supporter.Contact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: kuldrinfire https://www.instagram.com/masterkuldrin/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinhttp://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresourceLimits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey

Recorded: 5/11/2019 / Published: 6/3/2019Call in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.comOn this episode of the Krypt we are hitting the rules to love by and then we are going to an interview from DomCon, LA 2019, with Master Reverend Gear from House RavynBlood and the Kinky AP Podcast and his girl Vee about their journey and about his podcast. Now, this is a lot different from my usual style. These are two amazing people and we couldn’t stop making each other laugh but the nuggets of wisdom in this are quite abundant.https://Patreon.com/KuldrinskryptRules to Love by:1: Safe, sane, consensual, and informed2: KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity3: “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young[1:35] Master Reverend Gear and Vee of House RavynBlood and the Kinky AF Podcast. http://kinkyafpodcast.com[2:12] The surprise of being covered and going from Sir Gear to Master Gear.[4:37] Vee, how do you feel about it all...and being “voluntold”?[5:23] What is the Kinky AF Podcast about? http://kinkyafpodcast.com[6:50] How lond have the two of you been in a dynamic?[8:27] What is the goal of Kinky AF Podcast? http://kinkyafpodcast.comInformative, Educational, and Fun![12:06] How much is Vee on the show?[13:45] Topping from the bottom with negotiated permission.[16:42] How long have you both been involved in the kink scene?[17:49] How Master Gear got started out.[20:36] How was it for Vee being thrown into the mix with someone that had so much local popularity?[23:23] Master Gabriel’s presentation speech to Master Gear upon bestowing him with his Master’s Cover.Show notes can be found at https://kuldrinskrypt.com/218Thank you:Show Producers:Pro Producer($100/month): Anonymous.Executive Producers ($25/month): Jeremiah, Jess, ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia,  Feline_Rouge, babylove2269, and FaisilSr. Producers ($10/month): Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx, JayKay, Queen Sage, SortOutTheKinks, Delilah, SirMurualRespect and Master Gabriel.Producers ($5/month): Kainsin, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, Roxiebear, olive_eyes, Seine (Zine), and AlexandriaJr. Producers ($1/month): K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, LxSoumis, and Hayley.If you would like to become one of our show producers go to our website, https://kuldrinskrypt.com/support to get that information.BDSM Contracts for their donation of their beautiful 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts.. http://bdsmcontracts.org coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.https://www.daycollars.comDay Collars is a place for personalized handmade collars, leashes, cuffs and belts.http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys.Next Time on the Krypt:We are talking to Master Feenix about his life long journey of rope. In the meantime go to https://kuldrinskrypt.com for show notes, how to subscribe information, and the link to Fetlife group so you can take part in the conversation and be eligible for giveaways. While you’re there click on support us to become a Patreon supporter.Contact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: masterkuldrin https://www.instagram.com/masterkuldrin/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinhttp://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresourceLimits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey

Recorded: 5/11/2019 / Published: 5/27/2019Welcome to Kuldrin’s Krypt I’m your host Master Kuldrin. If you are new to the show I use my 24 years of BDSM experience and 20 working the psychology field to dispel myths, get rid of stereotypes, and answer your questions about BDSM. You can call in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.comOn this episode of the Krypt we are telling you briefly about a change to our Patreon Page, hitting the rules to love by, and then we are going to an interview from DomCon, LA 2019, with Sir Welph and Sirs’ Button, Robin about telling her children about their D/s relationship.https://Patreon.com/KuldrinskryptRules to Love by:1: Safe, sane, consensual, and informed2:KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity3: “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young[2:38] Sir Welph and Sir’s Button Robin[2:57] Explain to us your dynamic and how you met.[3:59] How long have you been into the lifestyle?[6:15] How much of Sir Welph’s Old Guard training and military experience bleeds over into your dynamic?[7:50] Telling Sir’s Welph’s adult children.[9:40] Telling Sir’s Button Robin’s children.[11:17] Helping the child to understand that it’s not abuse because it is consensual and explaining their roles.[16:25] Balancing playtime and being parents.[19:00] What is the one piece of advice you would go back in time and tell yourself?[20:00} What is one warning you give your younger self?Show notes can be found at https://kuldrinskrypt.com/217Thank you:Show Producers:Pro Producer($100/month): Anonymous.Executive Producers ($25/month): Jeremiah, Jess, ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia,  Feline_Rouge, babylove2269, and FaisilSr. Producers ($10/month): Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx, JayKay, Queen Sage, SortOutTheKinks, Delilah, and SirMurualRespect.Producers ($5/month): Kainsin, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, Roxiebear, olive_eyes, Seine (Zine), and AlexandriaJr. Producers ($1/month): K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, LxSoumis, and Hayley.If you would like to become one of our show producers go to our website, https://kuldrinskrypt.com/support to get that information.BDSM Contracts for their donation of their beautiful 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts.. http://bdsmcontracts.org coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.https://www.daycollars.comDay Collars is a place for personalized handmade collars, leashes, cuffs and belts.http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys.Next Time on the Krypt:Next time on The Krypt we are talking to Master Reverend Gear and Vee from the Kinky A.F. podcast and House Ravynblood https://anchor.fm/kinkyafpodcast. In the meantime go to https://kuldrinskrypt.com for show notes, how to subscribe information, and the link to Fetlife group so you can take part in the conversation and be eligible for giveaways. While you’re there click on support us to become a Patreon supporter.Contact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: masterkuldrin https://www.instagram.com/masterkuldrin/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinhttp://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresource Limits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey

Recorded: 5/12/2019 / Published: 5/20/2019Call in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.comOn this episode:1. Rules to Love By.2. My Collar Maker.3. Mistress Cyan. She is lifestyle kinster, Professional Dominatrix, founder of DomCon, dungeon owner, LGBTQ2A advocate, a living legend, one of the most genuine people I have ever met, and so many more amazing things. [1:05] Rules to Love by:1. Safe, sane, consensual, and informed2. KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity3. “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young[1:29] https://www.daycollars.comDay Collars is a place for personalized handmade collars, leashes, cuffs and belts. They cater to everyone, from sporty and informal daily fashion to the leather community. They will guide you through the styling of your accessory and the whole thing concerning your order is personalized to your needs and specifications. For inspiration and ideas on your personal style or to simply admire their completed works, visit their gallery page.[2:00] Mistress Cyan Interview http://www.mistresscyan.com/[2:30] What is and where is DomCon?[3:11] Why did you start DomCon? Professional Vs. Lifestyle Communities?[6:27] How long where you kinky before making it a profession?[8:35] How has DomCon help to change the cultural view of BDSM/Kink and what is https://LAPride.org/[10:50] Torture Garden: Globe Theatre 10pm-2:30am. Los Angeles, CA September 14, 2019. https://www.torturegarden.com/events/torture-garden-inernational/104-torture-garden-los-angeles[:] DomCon NOLA (New Orleans, LA, USA) October 10th-13th, 2019. Astor Crowne Plaza. https://www.domcon.com/home/custom?page=DomCon+New+Orleans[15:34] Sanctuary LAX Dungeon https://www.sanctuarylax.comShow notes can be found at https://kuldrinskrypt.com/216Thank you: 1. Show Producers:-Pro Producer($100/month): Anonymous. Executive Producers ($25/month): Jeremiah, Jess, ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia,  Feline_Rouge, babylove2269, and Faisil-Sr. Producers ($10/month): Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx, JayKay, Queen Sage, SortOutTheKinks, Delilah, and SirMurualRespect.-Producers ($5/month): Kainsin, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, Roxiebear, olive_eyes, Seine (Zine), and Alexandria-Jr. Producers ($1/month): K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, LxSoumis, and Hayley. If you would like to become one of our show producers go to our website, https://kuldrinskrypt.com/support to get that information.2. BDSM contracts for their donation of their beautiful 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts.. http://bdsmcontracts.org coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.3.Whipping Stripes http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys. Next Time on the Krypt: Sir Welph and Sir's Button talk about their dynamic and what how they handled her daughter asking questions about him telling her what to do. Contact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: masterkuldrin https://www.instagram.com/masterkuldrin/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinContact Info: http://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresourceLimits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey

Recorded and Published: 5/01/2019Call in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.com[0:55] Rules to Love by:1: Safe, sane, consensual, and informed2: KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity3: “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young[1:21] https://www.daycollars.com[1:52] Dr. Gary Chapman gives, what most expert and layperson alike, consider an excellent representation of the different ways you and I offer and receive acts of love in his appropriately titled book "The Five Love Languages: How To Express Heartfelt Commitment To Your Mate". Let go through these and see how these also apply to the world of BDSM.As we do, make sure to keep in mind that you probably are a mix of these to some degree. Most people have a primary love language and a few secondary ones but there are those that have an equal part of two or even all five of them. Also, consider that for a lot of people the way they show love and affection is also the way they wish to receive it. So, if you are a person that shows love by giving a lot of gifts, chances are you also feel it by receiving lots of little gifts.[2:47] Words of Affirmation: This love language is marked by the desire to hear words of encouragement, approval, and appreciation.While vanilla compliments completely apply here saying “good girl” or “good boy/boi” is also important but some of the things that people often don’t think about are those less vanilla things. Basically, I’m talking about humiliation and degradation here. We are involved in this lifestyle because we accept and embrace all of our needs and for some a big part of this is being told how bad we are. You know that I work hard to keep this pretty despite the topic so I won’t go into obvious examples. However, with this, it is detrimental that people that have this as a primary love language and the need for degradations or humiliation to have all of these met in order to feel loved. Just don’t forget the importance of aftercare...which could be said about all of these. [3:50] Quality Time: This love language is marked by the desire to actively spend time with our significant other, having meaningful conversations or sharing recreational activities. At first glance, this is possibly the easiest one of the five to provide but examining it further and we can’t just brush over the word “quality”. There have been several times where Mayfair and I have set up dates and times to get together for a scene...I mean, it doesn’t get any more quality than that...but then things went wrong. Illness, worked overtime, the mood wasn’t right, family emergencies, ... hundreds of reason why thing haven’t always worked out. Is this considered quality time Well, some of it, yes. The planning time we spent together (not on the phone and especially not when texting), But most of it no. Now, I don’t say that for the times that we were actually able to get together and things like mood got in the way. I’m referring to when we were completely unable to meet up. Just because a scene was “unsuccessful” doesn’t mean that is was a failure or that the time we spent together wasn’t quality. Just like judging the quality of a scene by the pretties is leaves is a HUGE mistake, so is judging a scene that ends earlier than a planned.[5:25] Receiving Gifts: This love language is marked by the desire to receive gifts, regardless of whether they are expensive commercial gifts or heartfelt, handmade gifts. Like the others this one is pretty self-explanatory but with us kinky folk this one might also include the gift of a pretty, a bite, an additional play partner for the evening, or any number of wildly creative things that you could conjure from the depths of your imagination. Yes, some of these things might also crossover into the other four categories, and we have to be careful to not let them crossover too much or we aren’t speaking the right language, but if it is something that they (not you) would consider a gift then it would count. On a personal note, this one is one of the ones I greatly struggle with as the receiver. Though I am appreciative for gifts, I would much rather be the person giving than the one receiving.[6:27] Acts of Service: This love language is marked by the desire to have someone do things such as dishwashing, dog walking, and laundry for you.Ah the thing that a lot of people think of in the world of BDSM when they hear the word service is someone cleaning their house for them or doing their laundry. Yes, these are absolutely acts of service but so is sex, bootblacking and other forms of leather care like cleaning floggers and other toys, dropping of a meal to you at work, carrying a stack of your business cards just in case you run out, and cleaning the dungeon equipment after you have played with them or someone else.  In this world, service can and often is servicing. In Elizabeth Cramer’s book “Dom’s Guide to submissive Training” she talks about the importance of oral sex being administered daily. This is WAY more about the act of service than it is about the sexual act. Just because something walks like a duck and quacks like a duck we assume its a duck but sometimes it’s something completely different. If you think back to the comparison Master Arcane made between Alice in the real world and Alice through the looking glass, you will easily understand what I am talking about. https://kuldrinskrypt.com/114[8:00] Physical Touch: This love language is marked by the desire to be touched, whether it's holding hands, hugging, kissing, a stroking of the skin, or sex.In my experience, service and this one seem to be the most common amongst the kink community but do not let that sway your own thought, feeling, and most importantly needs. Sadly, it is also one of the most misused and abused forms of love there is. And here is why, with the popularity of kink becoming so prevalent within the popular American culture people feel the need to be the stereotypes they read about. Thus, we have a new generation of young and old people alike that feel they have to be Master Domly Dom stoic Butthead to be Dominant. Thus any meaning and loving touches go straight out the window. All passionate little caresses or hair stokes disappear into the guise of the role they feel they have to play. This is far from the truth. You know me and in that, you know that I constantly advocate for two primary things-communication and aftercare. The thing here though is that while touching, cuddling, kissing, or sex might be a necessity for someone's aftercare that does not count as their required physical touch to feel love. No. That is there required touch to feel safe. Let me repeat that. Anything done in aftercare, whether it is physical touch, gift giving, affirmations, time, acts of service do not in any way EVER count toward some imaginary credit to speaking someone else’s love language. These are things done to make them feel safe. What does count is that random hug, kiss, hair stroke, should rub, or sexual act.[11:09] My Results: (From https://www.psychologies.co.uk/tests/whats-your-love-language.html) “You respond to physical touch!" (for complete shownotes: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/215 )[13:53] The thing that is most important to take away from this is that we need to be aware of our own love language and the love language of the people we are in relationships with. Whether that be family, friends, or lovers. By becoming aware and actively engaging each other in the way they prefer we will all live a happier, healthier, and less stressed life. I tried for years to talk my preferred language of touch to people that spoke in terms of the other languages and no one in those relationships was happy and all of us felt misunderstood and honestly quite often rejected...and sure rejection in a scene might feel nice but to live that way on a daily basis will create depression and resentment. Besides, if you are going to have a relationship of love and respect then you have to tell them in the way that they understand that you love them and from that, they will also know that you respect them...at least...that’s one piece of that particular puzzle.The show notes for this episode which contains all links can be found at https://kuldrinskrypt.com/215Show Producers: Pro Producer($100/month): Anonymous.Executive Producers ($25/month): Jeremiah, Jess, ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia,  Feline_Rouge, and babylove2269.Sr. Producers ($10/month): Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx, JayKay, Queen Sage, and SortOutTheKinks.Producers ($5/month): Kainsin, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, Roxiebear, olive_eyes, Seine (Zine), and AlexandriaJr. Producers ($1/month): K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, LxSoumis, and Hayley. Become our show producer: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/supportVendors I use and trust:https://BDSMContracts.org: 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts.. http://bdsmcontracts.org coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys.https://DayCollars.comNext Time on the Krypt:Next time on The Krypt ???.Contact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: kuldrinfire https://www.instagram.com/kuldrinfire/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinhttp://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresourceLimits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey

Recorded: 4/16/2019 / Published: 4/16/2019PatreonCan call in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.comOn this episode of the Krypt we are hitting the rules to love by, I have to share with you my new collar maker https://www.daycollars.com, and then we are diving into an interesting topic presented to me by a play partner, a friend, a listener, and a show producer, SortOutTheKinks, on Reserved Dominants Vs. Assertive submissives. Rules to Love by:1: Safe, sane, consensual, and informed2: KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity3: “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Younghttps://www.daycollars.com Day Collars is a place for personalized handmade collars, leashes, cuffs and belts. They cater to everyone, from sporty and informal daily fashion to the leather community. They will guide you through the styling of your accessory and the whole thing concerning your order is personalized to your needs and specifications. For inspiration and ideas on your personal style or to simply admire their completed works, visit their gallery page.-The Reserved DominantIn order to truly understand this topic I have to first define what I mean by “reserved”. This can be done in a few simple descriptive words such as less outgoing, shy, withdrawn, quiet, standoffish, wallflower, ...these are all descriptors of what I am referring to when I say reserved but just because these things might describe a person it in no way means they aren’t a good Dominant. Think about as you would bread. There are several types, white, wheat, pumpernickel, rye, but they are all bread. There are a few different ingredients that make all those types of bread, bread but they all have a few other different ingredients that make them different. Just as with people, these ingredients are the foundation of what makes us, us. Working to get over shyness: A lot of people think that a person has to be outgoing or even a Type A personality to be a Dom or Top and this simply isn’t true. In fact, a lot of the more typical Type A’s out there would rather be submissive in their personal lives in order to balance out their professional lives. Education Level: Some Dominants may not be confident in their skills, and this may contribute to why they are less apt to invite someone to play or agree to play with others. Going out to classes can improve this and boost confidence in skills.Limited Event Experience: Getting out to play spaces, dungeons, parties, and conventions means getting around like-minded individuals, which in turn means more social education and interaction with experienced people that can teach you the skills necessary to be more confident.Psychological Foundation: Whether it is nurture or nature, some people are just quiet, withdrawn, shy, or have some form of social anxiety and there is NOTHING wrong with that as long as it doesn’t interfere with your activities of daily living. If everyone was the same it would be a very boring world. It is a complete myth propagated by “Master Mister Domly Daddy” that if you are like this then you are not a Dom at all but actually a sub. This is such crap! YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE VERY EXTROVERTED TO BE A GOOD DOM or TOP!!!Examples: Corey: Things may be slow going with him at first, but it doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you or doesn’t want to play. He is just a very reserved person that needs a connection with a partner to play with them.IrishMTDragon: Out of all the people I have met along the way he is one of the best examples of this. I interviewed him in S01E27 (https://kuldrinskrypt.com/127) where he talks about his social awkwardness and anxiety but I didn’t see any way that those things made him less of a Dom than me or anyone else that doesn’t have those issues. And believe me, I’m not saying I don’t have issues just not those two...at least not nearly as bad as he does. But regardless, nothing about it prevents him, you, or anyone else from fulfilling the duties of a Dominant. And if you’d like to know what I think those duties are, listen to episodes:S01E03-“The Dom’s Role and Common Mistakes” (https://kuldrinskrypt.com/103)S01E14-”Master Arcane Interview” (https://kuldrinskrypt.com/114)S01E30-”Types of BDSM Dominants” (https://kuldrinskrypt.com/130)S02E04-”Dominants Bill of Rights and Calling Red” (https://kuldrinskrypt.com/dominants-bill-of-rights-and-calling-red-s02e04) The Assertive submissive:Again understanding what is meant by my terminology here is important. Some people think that assertiveness is being stubborn, overbearing, or controlling but the way it is meant in this context is simply someone who isn’t reserved. They are not afraid to be the center of attention, they don’t let social anxieties get in the way of a good time, or they are not afraid to ask a Dom or Top to play with them. In other words, outgoing. If you are a reserved person just talking about some of these things might sound extremely scary or you might wish you could be assertive like these people but just like the saying that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, this isn’t without its own set of specific issues. Assertive subs:May feel that they intimidate dominants when pursuing a relationship. In S01E50-Who Pursues Whom in BDSM” (https://kuldrinskrypt.com/who-pursues-whom-in-bdsm-s01e50) we talked a lot about this and both sides of the coin can be a tough sell to you if you feel the other side is correct but regardless, I have known many Dominants and Tops that would get “clammy” if they were approached by a sub or bottom for play or for a potential relationship. I have also heard a lot of stories from /s types about them scaring off potentials because the person they were pursuing believed that anyone that was “truly submissive” would wait until they were addressed. Personally, I love when someone is assertive and lets me know exactly what they would like from me...but then I really just consider that effective communication. Which was discussed at length in S01E24-”Effective Communication in BDSM Relationship” (https://kuldrinskrypt.com/124) Assertive subs might know what they want and not want to waste their time with someone they “think” doesn’t fit but I’ve often seen people judge to quickly and pass on opportunities that they, more than likely, would have greatly benefitted from.The last thing to consider is being forward in asking for what they want/need. This one is almost always a good thing but like everything, there is an exception to the rule. Some can be so forward that they forget about another person's needs or boundaries and embarrass them, or even unintentionally disrespect them or someone they are close too. I once had someone walk up to me, bite me, tell me I was the sexiest person they’ve ever met, and forcefully offered their submission while they were holding me by my package. She honestly thought I would appreciate the honesty, flattery, and forwardness but my date nor hers appreciated anything about her actions. The Bottom Line:Both of these things can go either way with a Reserved/Assertive Dominant and a Reserved/Assertive sub.  Whether you are more assertive or more reserved than most, you be you and don’t let other people define you as a Dominant, submissive, Top, or bottom. That is for you to decide. If you feel that these, or any other personality traits are causing issues in your life take the bull by the horns by talking with a professional and develop a plan to change those things.[:] The shownotes for this episode which contains links to all the other episodes I have talked to you about can be found at https://kuldrinskrypt.com/214Show Producers:Pro Producer($100/month): Anonymous. Executive Producers ($25/month): Jeremiah, Jess, ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia,  Feline_Rouge, and babylove2269. Sr. Producers ($10/month): Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx, JayKay, Queen Sage, and SortOutTheKinks.Producers ($5/month): Kainsin, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, Roxiebear, olive_eyes, Seine (Zine), and AlexandriaJr. Producers ($1/month): K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, LxSoumis, and Hayley. https://kuldrinskrypt.com/support BDSM 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts. http://bdsmcontracts.org Coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys. Next time on The Krypt ???. In the meantime go to https://kuldrinskrypt.com for show notes, how to subscribe information, and the link to Fetlife group so you can take part in the conversation and be eligible for giveaways. While you’re there click on support us to become a Patreon supporter.Contact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: masterkuldrin https://www.instagram.com/masterkuldrin/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinhttp://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresourceLimits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey

Recorded: 3/26/2019 / Published: 4/1/2019PatreonCall in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.comOn this episode of the Krypt we are hitting the rules to love by, I have to share with you my new collar maker https://www.daycollars.com, and then we are talking to My sub, Mayfair about her experience in entering the scene. [0:50] Rules to Love by:Safe, sane, consensual, and informedKNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity“Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young[1:14] https://www.daycollars.comDay Collars is a place for personalized handmade collars, leashes, cuffs and belts. They cater to everyone, from sporty and informal daily fashion to the leather community. With DayCollars.com you can make your own personalized style of collars, leashes, belts, cuffs and other leather products. They will guide you through the styling of your accessory and the whole thing concerning your order is personalized to your needs and specifications. For inspiration and ideas on your personal style or to simply admire their completed works, visit their gallery page.[2:12] What caused you to finally venture out to your first munch?[4:05] What were her initial thoughts going into the first needle play with you? And also how you approached the negotiation with it.[5:19] What finally made her take that big step to venture to events? And how did she handle the first time, as she (going off her profile) likes to stay on the outskirts of groups?[8:00] What was she most excited to try, as well as what was she most scared to try, of the things she has tried so far?[10:30] What was her biggest lifestyle fear/worry/concern, and in her mind, have you helped alleviate or lessen the fear/worry/concern, even on a small level?[14:21] (From LillyChaos) You’ve mentioned two things as we’ve been talking. One was that she doesn’t like to be touched and the other was that she’s overly apologetic. I’d be interested to know how she deals with (well dealt with before you) all the huggy touchy people without it being awkward. When people ask for a hug and I say no, I feel guilty and end up doing it even though it makes me extremely uncomfortable. [16:30] The other question id like to know the answer to is how to break the habit of apologizing and feeling the need to.[19:14] (Sneaking one last one in,  if it doesn't get covered, that's fine too ~Alexanderia) How has joining Kuldrin and his wife (in her interview she referred to you as “our sub”) changed your thoughts and views on relationships?[21:56] how she deals with any conflict or hurt feelings or being upset that may occur. Everyone messes up, but (besides communication, like how?) it would be nice to know how it’s dealt with without crossing lines. [35:15] Also, has she ever had difficulty saying no and if she did, how did she overcome that?https://kuldrinskrypt.com/213A final note or two: I’d like to thank our Pro Producer, who wishes to remain anonymous. Executive Producers Jeremiah, Jess, Feline_Rouge, ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia, babylove2269, and Queen Sage. Our Sr. Producers Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx, and SortOutTheKinks. Our Producers Kainsin, Roxiebear, Sihlus, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, JayKay, olive_eyes, and Seine (Zine). And our Jr. Producers K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, LxSoumis, Hayley, and Alexandria. If you would like to become one of our show producers go to our website, https://kuldrinskrypt.com/support to get that information.Second, I’d like to talk BDSM contracts for their donation of their beautiful 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts.. http://bdsmcontracts.org coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.Finally, I’d like to thank http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys. Next Week's AgendaNext time on The Krypt ???. In the meantime go to https://kuldrinskrypt.com for show notes, how to subscribe information, and the link to Fetlife group so you can take part in the conversation and be eligible for giveaways. While you’re there click on support us to become a Patreon supporter.Contact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: kuldrinfire https://www.instagram.com/kuldrinfire/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinhttp://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresourceLimits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey

Recorded: 3/15/2019 / Published: 3/16/2019Call in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.comOn this episode of the Krypt we are hitting the rules to love by, I have to share with you my new collar maker https://www.daycollars.com, and then we are talking BDSM Punishments Vs Funishments.. [0:53] Rules to Love by:1: Safe, sane, consensual, and informed2: KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity3: “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young[1:18] https://www.daycollars.comDay Collars is a place for personalized handmade collars, leashes, cuffs and belts. They cater to everyone, from sporty and informal daily fashion to the leather community. With DayCollars.com you can make your own personalized style of collars, leashes, belts, cuffs and other leather products. They will guide you through the styling of your accessory and the whole thing concerning your order is personalized to your needs and specifications. For inspiration and ideas on your personal style or to simply admire their completed works, visit their gallery page.[3:30] According to “uncle google” a punishment is “the infliction or imposition of a penalty as retribution for an offense.”[4:00] Not all dynamics include punishments.[4:40] Types of PunishmentSpanking, Kneeling, Kneeling on Something Painful like Legos, Bags of Rice, or a bag of screws, Standing in the Corner, Writing, Repetitive Writing, The Removal of Privileges such as TV, Phones, Internet usage or Going out with Friends (Being Grounded), Putting bruises and/or bite marks in places that the sub is certain to constantly bump, touch, or scrape throughout the next few days or week.[6:03] Funishment: When the sub (brat) intentionally and playfully acts out in a non-disrespectful way to get the Dom to “punish” them. Playful name calling, playfully pushing boundaries, or touching the Dominant in an inappropriate way such as tickling them instead of coming out and asking for play. [8:31] Types of FunishmentsTypical scening such as impact, electric, needles, whatever a couples normal play would be.Tickle tortureOrgasm Control such as torture or denialGuess the implement game[11:20] Example: Scene where someone was playfully acting out so I handcuffed her to the ladder.[13:16] Misuse of the term punishment?Usually happens with newbies and online Doms and often can be a sign that the person doesn’t really know what they are doing and/or doesn't have the experience they are claiming to have. They will ask about ways to use impact implements to punish their subs when they are actually talking about general scening. A punishment is for when rules have been broken.[15:58] How to punishments “correctly”:1: ALWAYS talk about the offense and define the expectations and how they were not followed. Also remember, that they had to be defined to begin with otherwise you are making rules up as you go along and that’s not fair...which I’m guilty of.2: If emotions are high take as long as you need to calm down whether it is minutes or months. NEVER PUNISH ANGRY!3: Set the time for the punishment to occur. Make it ritualistic. It helps to set the tone and build a protocol for future events.4: Deliver the punishment.5: Follow up if the punishment is a task such as writing.6: Provide aftercare7: Have sub journal about the entire event from breaking the rule to having to write the journal entry.8: Discuss the incident and provide closure of the incident. “Secondary aftercare”9: Never bring it up again in a resentful, harsh, harmful, or intentionally obtuse manner. [23:50] Punishment Examples:St. Patrick’s Day 2018 example with Mayfair and why she was punished.Nipple clamps on tongue for being disrespectful, demanding, controlling and rule setting. [30:25] Funishment Example: Being a Bratty Dom and making Mayfair wear handcuffs during the entire night at a Dungeon where she still had to perform all of her typical acts of service.[31:45] Abuse DefinedAbuse (v): use (something) to bad effect or for a bad purpose; misuse.treat (a person or an animal) with cruelty or violence, especially regularly or repeatedly.Abuse (n):the improper use of something.cruel and violent treatment of a person or animal.[32:27] Types of punishments that are abuse.1: Anything that is a hard limit.2: Any punishment that is perform uncontrolled or in an altered state.3: Anger, Intoxication, Mental Illness, …4: Any thing that has not been negotiated.5: (Sometimes) Humiation and Degradation 6: (Sometimes) Time and affection denial.7: When the Dom changes the rules just so he can make the sub fail. He’s not a Dom, he is an abuser creating ways to satisify his broken ego and needs.8: Things done that intentionally go beyond hurt and cause harm.9: Things done out of spite.10: Pushing a sub to immediately call red at the very start of a scene just to prove a “point”.https://kuldrinskrypt.com/212A final note or two: I’d like to thank our Pro Producer, who wishes to remain anonymous. Executive Producers Jeremiah, Jess, ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia, babylove2269, and Queen Sage. Our Sr. Producers Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx and Feline_Rouge. Our Producers Kainsin, Roxiebear, Sihlus, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, JayKay, olive_eyes, and Seine (sane). And our Jr. Producers K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, LxSoumis, Hayley, and Alexandria. If you would like to become one of our show producers go to our website, https://kuldrinskrypt.com/support to get that information.Second, I’d like to talk BDSM contracts for their donation of their beautiful 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts.. http://bdsmcontracts.org coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.And finally, I’d like to thank http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys. NEXT WEEK’S AGENDANext time on The Krypt ???. In the meantime go to https://kuldrinskrypt.com for show notes, how to subscribe information, and the link to Fetlife group so you can take part in the conversation and be eligible for giveaways. While you’re there click on support us to become a Patreon supporter.Contact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: kuldrinfire https://www.instagram.com/kuldrinfire/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinhttp://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresourceLimits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey

https://kuldrinskrypt.com/211Recorded: 2/16/2019 / Published: 2/22/2019Call in at 865-268-4005 to leave your question or visit the Krypt at https://kudrinskrypt.comOn this episode of the Krypt we are hitting the rules to love by and then talking to Master Gabriel. [0:44] Rules to Love by:1: Safe, sane, consensual, and informed2: KNKI: Knowledge, No Intolerance, Kindness, Integrity3: “Submission is not about authority and it’s not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.” -Wm. Paul Young[1:05] Master Gabriel:A Sadistic Dominant, an Energy Player, and a Devoted Community Educator drawing from an eclectic background of Martial Arts, Psychology, and other surprising contexts, Master Gabriel has been a part of the LA BDSM Community for over a decade. He has a robust skill set spanning various types of play and is known for his unusual creativity in scenes and taking his bottoms to new levels. With his Household, House RavynBlood, Master Gabriel produces, co-hosts, and advises on several events in the LA Community. Together they run events such as Gentleman in Charge and Sanctuary Marketplace, as well as involvement in L.A. Pride, AVN’s, and DomCon. He and many members of the Household also bring many educational opportunities to the kink community. He is known to many as "The Voice" of DomCon LA, and "The Voice" & Master of Ceremonies for THE LAIR at the AVN Expo in Las Vegas.[2:33] Ten Licks:How long have been into Kink?Top, bottom, or switch?Relationship Status?Favorite Position?Favorite Implement?Favorite Roleplay?Favorite kink or fetish?Favorite place for kink?Strangest Place you've had sex?Something you want to try?[5:39] What is your definition of a BDSM Household?[7:46] Why is equality so important?[9:04] How big is House RavynBlood?[9:57] What is the difference between D/s and T/b?[12:37] Can you be a Top if you haven’t bottomed?[14:56] The steps to become a House Member.[24:10] How did you create the Household and how were you trained?[27:11] The burden of Head of Household.[28:45] Continuing the steps of becoming a House member.[34:32] Why be in a Household???[42:00] Balancing faith, family, work, and being a Household member?[44:19] Handling the House Financials.[47:06] What is DomCon?[48:55] Earning and keeping a Master’s Cover?[57:00] Household Rituals?[1:01:10] The Hall of Kink at DomCon https://kuldrinskrypt.com/hallofkink https://kinkytimeline.org/ MasterGabrielLAX@gmail.comA final note: 1: Our Executive Producers Jeremiah, Jess, and ArcaneD.G.R. & violetaurelia. Our Sr. Producers Matt, xEmeraldxWolfx and Feline_Rouge. Our Producers Kainsin, Roxiebear, Sihlus, ThatPlace: Oklahoma City, JayKay, and olive_eyes. And our Jr. Producers K-2SO, BuffaloDom84, Painwaits, LxSoumis, Hayley, and AlexandMae. If you would like to become one of our show producers go to our website, https://kuldrinskrypt.com/support to get that information.2: BDSM contracts for their donation of their beautiful 25 page soft and hardbound M/s and D/s contracts.. http://bdsmcontracts.org coupon code: kuldrin20 for a 20% discount on all purchases.3: I’d like to thank http://whippingstripes.com my personal maker of leather and paracord impact toys. On the next episode:Next time on The Krypt ???. In the meantime go to https://kuldrinskrypt.com for show notes, how to subscribe information, and the link to Fetlife group so you can take part in the conversation and be eligible for giveaways. While you’re there click on support us to become a Patreon supporter.Contact info:Email: Sir@kuldrinskrypt.comFetlife Group: https://fetlife.com/groups/159275Fb: Kuldrin Fire https://www.facebook.com/kuldrin.fireTwitter: @MasterKuldrin https://twitter.com/MasterKuldrinInstagram: kuldrinfire https://www.instagram.com/kuldrinfire/Patreon: kuldrinskrypt https://www.patreon.com/KuldrinsKryptPaypal: MasterKuldrin http://paypal.me/masterkuldrinhttp://kuldrinskrypt.com/contactresourceLimits and Interest Survey: https://kuldrinskrypt.com/survey