

YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship with Jodi Carlton, MEd
Jodi Carlton, MEd, LLC
Jodi Carlton is a leading world expert in mixed neurotype relationship dynamics and communication. Her personal, but direct, style of educating and coaching is a favorite of both neurodivergent and neurotypical partners around the globe.
Her unique blend of personal experience in her own neurodiverse relationships, as well as her professional expertise, positions her to understand both autistic and non-autistic individuals. She bridges the communication gap for couples with a blame-free mind-set, and a goal of clarity.
Her unique blend of personal experience in her own neurodiverse relationships, as well as her professional expertise, positions her to understand both autistic and non-autistic individuals. She bridges the communication gap for couples with a blame-free mind-set, and a goal of clarity.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Mar 27, 2024 • 49min
#2: Getting Out of Enemy Mode In Your Neurodiverse Relationship.
Mona and I delve into the necessity of 'stopping the bleed' when your relationship is stuck and has become hopeless. We address the most damaging issues in relationships by sharing our own personal stories and insights from being in neurodiverse marriages for over two decades. Mona and I discuss the importance of recognizing and stopping toxic cycles, the benefits of both individual and couple's therapy, and the transformative impact of setting boundaries on personal health and relationship dynamics.
Featuring co-host Mona Kay from the Neurodiverse Love Podcast, this is Episode 2 (Season 4) of the YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship podcast. This 5-part series is about navigating relationship challenges to figure out a path forward.
00:00 Welcome to Episode 2: Navigating Neurodiverse Relationships
00:28 The Five Key Steps for Relationship Challenges
01:35 Episode Overview: Stopping the Bleed
03:59 The Support Group
04:49 Exploring Personal Stories and Insights
15:57 Exploring Boundaries and Codependency
26:00 The Impact of Communication Styles and Trust Issues
26:57 Understanding Neurodiversity in Relationships
27:41 The Importance of Individual Therapy
36:00 Setting Boundaries for Safety and Emotional Well-being
46:23 The Physical and Mental Health Consequences of Relationship Stress
48:24 Looking Ahead: Making Difficult Decisions
___________________
👩💼 Hi, I'm Jodi Carlton, a leading world expert on adult #neurodiverserelationship dynamics and interpersonal #communication. I am a seasoned professional with 20+ years of experience as a #therapist and #relationshipcoach specializing in #autism, #ADHD, #anxiety, #depression, and #abuse. I am #trauma certified and trained in Accelerated Resolution Therapy and hypnosis.
MY PERSONAL STORY: Although I have professional counselor education and training, my life experiences in my own neurodiverse marriage, as a parent to my #autisticdaughter and #adhd son, and my relationships with other neurodiverse family and friends have been my personal training ground. I am also a survivor of narcissistic abuse and have experienced the narc abuse cycle in multiple relationships. I have battled and healed from the codependency that results from having an abusive childhood.
QUIZZES: I have developed customized quizzes for you to identify traits of neurodiversity as well as toxic personality traits in partners. Take a free quiz at: http://jodicarlton.com
COACHING: My mission is to help you get clarity about yourself and your relationships to make informed choices, heal from your own pain, and improve your overall quality of life. I coach individuals, couples, and families worldwide using a solution-focused approach that results in life-altering answers and real change.
🎙 PODCAST: Listen to the "YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship" podcast, which has been downloaded in over 70 countries on your favorite podcast platform or watch it here on YouTube.
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLSyXJdjUav7pSwpq7nmSdEQZMwiI3eqHR
💁♀️ COMMUNICATION COURSE: The world's first program that facilitates life-altering clarity and change for neurodiverse partners and couples who are stuck in a cycle of rehashing confusing and painful conflict and shutdown.
http://CracktheCommunicationCode.com
🌐 Visit me online at JodiCarlton.com to learn more and for more resources.
📱 FOLLOW ME and SUBSCRIBE:
YouTube: @jodicarlton
Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok: @thejodicarlton
LinkedIn: Jodi Carlton

Mar 20, 2024 • 55min
#1: ”When You Stop Recognizing Yourself, There’s Something Very Wrong”
In this 5-episode podcast series, I (Jodi Carlton, a neurodiverse relationship expert), and Mona Kay of the Neurodiverse Love Podcast, share very personal experiences from our own marriages to neurodiverse partners. We share a five-step approach for assessing relationship challenges and navigating a path forward. The podcast covers toxic dynamics, the importance of understanding neurodiversity in relationships, and offers support and strategies for communication, connection, and making difficult relationship choices. By sharing our journeys and insights, Mona and I aim to help you feel seen, understood, and less alone in your own neurodiverse relationships, but also to give you a framework for navigating your own neurodiverse relationship.
00:00 Welcome to Season Four: Navigating YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship
01:46 Introducing the Support Group: A Safe Space for All Neurotypes
04:41 Decision Making in Neurodiverse Relationships
06:22 Understanding the Stages of Assessing Relationship Challenges
11:14 Triage: Assessing the Risk in Your Relationship
16:41 Reflecting on Personal Experiences with Neurodiversity and Relationships
26:36 The Importance of Assessing Needs and Risks in Relationships
29:39 Unpacking the Past: Stories of Miscommunication and Conflict
30:17 The Christmas Eve Incident: A Tale of Family Dynamics
32:27 Navigating Neurodivergence and Codependency
33:47 The Shift from Romance to Reality
35:30 Unveiling Incompatibilities
40:19 Recognizing Red Flags and Toxicity
52:08 The Journey to Self-Recognition and Healing
___________________
👩💼 Hi, I'm Jodi Carlton, a leading world expert on adult #neurodiverserelationship dynamics and interpersonal #communication. I am a seasoned professional with 20+ years of experience as a #therapist and #relationshipcoach specializing in #autism, #ADHD, #anxiety, #depression, and #abuse. I am #trauma certified and trained in Accelerated Resolution Therapy and hypnosis.
MY PERSONAL STORY: Although I have professional counselor education and training, my life experiences in my own neurodiverse marriage, as a parent to my #autisticdaughter and #adhd son, and my relationships with other neurodiverse family and friends have been my personal training ground. I am also a survivor of narcissistic abuse and have experienced the narc abuse cycle in multiple relationships. I have battled and healed from the codependency that results from having an abusive childhood.
QUIZZES: I have developed customized quizzes for you to identify traits of neurodiversity as well as toxic personality traits in partners. Take a free quiz at: http://jodicarlton.com
COMPREHENSIVE RELATIONSHIP EVALUATION: Assesses both partners to highlight unique traits and characteristics in areas such as personality, sensory processing, logic & reasoning, empathy, memory, problem-solving, and more. This data reveals how a couple's differences are affecting their relationship. The purpose is not to identify one partner as "abnormal," but to understand how partners are different from one another.
COACHING: My mission is to help you get clarity about yourself and your relationships to make informed choices, heal from your own pain, and improve your overall quality of life. I coach individuals, couples, and families worldwide using a solution-focused approach that results in life-altering answers and real change.
🎙 PODCAST: Listen to the "YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship" podcast, which has been downloaded in over 70 countries on your favorite podcast platform or watch it here on YouTube.
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLSyXJdjUav7pSwpq7nmSdEQZMwiI3eqHR
💁♀️ COMMUNICATION COURSE: The world's first program that facilitates life-altering clarity and change for neurodiverse partners and couples who are stuck in a cycle of rehashing confusing and painful conflict and shutdown.
http://CracktheCommunicationCode.com
🌐 Visit me online at JodiCarlton.com to learn more and for more resources.
📱 FOLLOW ME and SUBSCRIBE:
YouTube: @jodicarlton
Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok: @thejodicarlton
LinkedIn: Jodi Carlton

Mar 18, 2024 • 2min
Season 4 is Coming! 5 Steps for Navigating YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship
In season four of 'YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship' podcast, Jodi Carlton teams up with Mona Kay from the “Neurodiverse Love” podcast to dive deep into personal experiences and professional insights on managing neurodiverse relationships. They discuss five key steps for assessing relationship challenges, whether it involves working together with a partner for a better connection or realizing it's time to part ways. With over two decades of experience in neurodiverse marriages, they share their own stories of navigating love, making tough decisions, and finding strategies that might be non-traditional but effective. This season aims to make listeners feel seen, understood, and less alone in their experiences. The first episode airs on Wednesday, March 20th.
00:00 Welcome to Season Four: Exploring Neurodiverse Relationships
00:14 Introducing the Co-Host and Our Mission
00:31 Five Key Steps for Navigating Relationship Challenges
00:58 Personal Journeys: Learning from Our Own Relationships
01:15 The Importance of Sharing Vulnerable Experiences
01:35 Join Us for the Journey

Mar 13, 2024 • 3min
”We’re all a little narcissistic.” Debunking This Myth
In this episode, Jodi Carlton, a neurodiversity expert and relationship coach who also specializes in personality disorders, addresses a dangerous myth that everyone has narcissistic traits. She emphasizes the distinction between common human behaviors and the destructive characteristics of narcissistic personality disorder.
Jodi highlights specific traits exclusive to narcissism, such as enjoying others' pain for personal gain and manipulating others by playing the victim. Her message clarifies how this myth minimizes the impact on individuals who are abused by narcissists, and aims to educate listeners on the true nature of narcissistic behavior versus normal human flaws and dysfunction.
00:00 Introduction
00:10 Debunking the Myth: Everyone is Narcissistic
00:42 Understanding Human Traits vs Narcissistic Traits
01:02 Identifying Narcissistic Traits
01:36 The Narcissist's Use of Victimhood
01:58 Power and Control in Narcissism
02:15 Conclusion: We're Not All a Little Bit Narcissistic

Mar 6, 2024 • 4min
Autistic Narcissists Are Dangerous!
In this bonus episode, neurodiversity expert and relationship coach Jodi Carlton explains the differences between autism and narcissistic personality disorder. She emphasizes that while both conditions can exist in the same individual, they are fundamentally unrelated, with autism being neurodevelopmental and genetic, and narcissism being potentially linked to genetics and social learning.
Jodi dispels dangerous myths suggesting that narcissistic traits are universal, pointing out the unique and harmful characteristics of narcissistic personality disorder that differentiate it from common human behaviors. She highlights the risks posed by individuals who exhibit both autism and extreme narcissism, including their potentially destructive actions and lack of regard for others' wellbeing.
00:00 Introduction
00:10 Understanding Autism and Narcissism: A Comparative Analysis
00:38 The Dangers of Autistic Narcissists
01:12 Human Traits vs Narcissistic Traits
01:35 The Myth of Universal Narcissism
01:46 The Impact of Narcissistic Abuse
02:27 Identifying Narcissistic Traits
03:23 The Power Dynamics of Narcissism
03:40 Conclusion

Feb 28, 2024 • 3min
Why does an autistic partner lie?
Neurodiverse relationship expert Jodi Carlton discusses the issue of lying within autism relationships in this bonus episode.
00:00 Neurodiverse Relationships and Lying
00:50 Understanding White Lies in Relationships
01:32 When Couples Have a Parental-Child Dynamic
01:46 An Example of Lying to Avoid Conflict
02:17 Differentiating Between Types of Lies
02:46 Recognizing and Addressing Lying in Relationships
___________________
👩💼 Hi, I'm Jodi Carlton, a leading world expert on adult #neurodiverserelationship dynamics and interpersonal #communication. I am a seasoned professional with 20+ years of experience as a #therapist and #relationshipcoach specializing in #autism, #ADHD, #anxiety, #depression, and #abuse. I am #trauma certified and trained in Accelerated Resolution Therapy and hypnosis.
MY PERSONAL STORY: Although I have professional counselor education and training, my life experiences in my own neurodiverse marriage, as a parent to my #autisticdaughter and #adhd son, and my relationships with other neurodiverse family and friends have been my personal training ground. I am also a survivor of narcissistic abuse and have experienced the narc abuse cycle in multiple relationships. I have battled and healed from the codependency that results from having an abusive childhood.
QUIZZES: I have developed customized quizzes for you to identify traits of neurodiversity as well as toxic personality traits in partners. Take a free quiz at: http://jodicarlton.com
COMPREHENSIVE RELATIONSHIP EVALUATION: Assesses both partners to highlight unique traits and characteristics in areas such as personality, sensory processing, logic & reasoning, empathy, memory, problem-solving, and more. This data reveals how a couple's differences are affecting their relationship. The purpose is not to identify one partner as "abnormal," but to understand how partners are different from one another.
COACHING: My mission is to help you get clarity about yourself and your relationships to make informed choices, heal from your own pain, and improve your overall quality of life. I coach individuals, couples, and families worldwide using a solution-focused approach that results in life-altering answers and real change.
🎙 PODCAST: Listen to the "YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship" podcast, which has been downloaded in over 70 countries on your favorite podcast platform or watch it here on YouTube.
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLSyXJdjUav7pSwpq7nmSdEQZMwiI3eqHR
💁♀️ COMMUNICATION COURSE: The world's first program that facilitates life-altering clarity and change for neurodiverse partners and couples who are stuck in a cycle of rehashing confusing and painful conflict and shutdown.
http://CracktheCommunicationCode.com
🌐 Visit me online at JodiCarlton.com to learn more and for more resources.
📱 FOLLOW ME and SUBSCRIBE:
YouTube: @jodicarlton
Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok: @thejodicarlton
LinkedIn: Jodi Carlton

Feb 23, 2024 • 4min
I’m autistic. Why do I zone out when people are talking?
In this bonus episode, Neurodiverse Relationship expert, Jodi Carlton, shares explains why autistic individuals struggle to stay focused in a conversation and shares some strategies for both partners to help with this challenge.
👩💼 Hi, I'm Jodi Carlton, a leading world expert on adult #neurodiverserelationship dynamics and interpersonal #communication. I am a seasoned professional with 20+ years of experience as a #therapist and #relationshipcoach specializing in #autism, #ADHD, #anxiety, #depression, and #abuse. I am #trauma certified and trained in Accelerated Resolution Therapy and hypnosis.
MY PERSONAL STORY: Although I have professional counselor education and training, my life experiences in my own neurodiverse marriage, as a parent to my #autisticdaughter and #adhd son, and my relationships with other neurodiverse family and friends have been my personal training ground. I am also a survivor of narcissistic abuse and have experienced the narc abuse cycle in multiple relationships. I have battled and healed from the codependency that results from having an abusive childhood.
AUTISM QUIZZES: I have developed customized quizzes for you to identify traits of neurodiversity as well as toxic personality traits in partners. Take a free quiz at: http://jodicarlton.com
COMPREHENSIVE RELATIONSHIP EVALUATION: Assesses both partners to highlight unique traits and characteristics in areas such as personality, sensory processing, logic & reasoning, empathy, memory, problem-solving, and more. This data reveals how a couple's differences are affecting their relationship. The purpose is not to identify one partner as "abnormal," but to understand how partners are different from one another.
COACHING: My mission is to help you get clarity about yourself and your relationships to make informed choices, heal from your own pain, and improve your overall quality of life. I coach individuals, couples, and families worldwide using a solution-focused approach that results in life-altering answers and real change.
🎙 PODCAST: Listen to the "YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship" podcast, which has been downloaded in over 70 countries on your favorite podcast platform or watch it on YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLSyXJdjUav7pSwpq7nmSdEQZMwiI3eqHR
💁♀️ COMMUNICATION COURSE: The world's first program that facilitates life-altering clarity and change for neurodiverse partners and couples who are stuck in a cycle of rehashing confusing and painful conflict and shutdown. http://CracktheCommunicationCode.com
🌐 Visit me online at JodiCarlton.com to learn more and for more resources.
📱 FOLLOW ME and SUBSCRIBE: YouTube: @jodicarlton Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok: @thejodicarlton
LinkedIn: Jodi Carlton

Feb 19, 2024 • 60min
Autism Relationship Tool - Images Versus Words
Neurodiverse Relationship expert, Jodi Carlton, shares a tip about improving communication with your autistic partner in this bonus episode.
👩💼 Hi, I'm Jodi Carlton, a leading world expert on adult #neurodiverserelationship dynamics and interpersonal #communication. I am a seasoned professional with 20+ years of experience as a #therapist and #relationshipcoach specializing in #autism, #ADHD, #anxiety, #depression, and #abuse. I am #trauma certified and trained in Accelerated Resolution Therapy and hypnosis.
MY PERSONAL STORY: Although I have professional counselor education and training, my life experiences in my own neurodiverse marriage, as a parent to my #autisticdaughter and #adhd son, and my relationships with other neurodiverse family and friends have been my personal training ground. I am also a survivor of narcissistic abuse and have experienced the narc abuse cycle in multiple relationships. I have battled and healed from the codependency that results from having an abusive childhood.
QUIZZES: I have developed customized quizzes for you to identify traits of neurodiversity as well as toxic personality traits in partners. Take a free quiz at: http://jodicarlton.com
COMPREHENSIVE RELATIONSHIP EVALUATION: Assesses both partners to highlight unique traits and characteristics in areas such as personality, sensory processing, logic & reasoning, empathy, memory, problem-solving, and more. This data reveals how a couple's differences are affecting their relationship. The purpose is not to identify one partner as "abnormal," but to understand how partners are different from one another.
COACHING: My mission is to help you get clarity about yourself and your relationships to make informed choices, heal from your own pain, and improve your overall quality of life. I coach individuals, couples, and families worldwide using a solution-focused approach that results in life-altering answers and real change.
🎙 PODCAST: Listen to the "YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship" podcast, which has been downloaded in over 70 countries on your favorite podcast platform or watch it here on YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLSyXJdjUav7pSwpq7nmSdEQZMwiI3eqHR
💁♀️ COMMUNICATION COURSE: The world's first program that facilitates life-altering clarity and change for neurodiverse partners and couples who are stuck in a cycle of rehashing confusing and painful conflict and shutdown. http://CracktheCommunicationCode.com
🌐 Visit me online at JodiCarlton.com to learn more and for more resources.
📱 FOLLOW ME and SUBSCRIBE: YouTube: @jodicarlton Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok: @thejodicarlton
LinkedIn: Jodi Carlton

Feb 14, 2024 • 6min
How to Have a Safe Disagreement in Your Neurodiverse Relationship
In this bonus episode, neurodiverse relationship expert, Jodi Carlton, shares advice on handling emotional responses in neurodiverse relationships. Jodi emphasizes the importance of acknowledging the validity of emotions from both partners, and discusses the problems that arise when fight or flight responses overwhelm the conversation and issues are not resolved.
00:00 A YouTube Comment
00:52 Validity of Emotions in Relationships
01:12 The Problem of Unresolved Conflict
02:23 The Importance of Safe Conversations
03:20 The Solution: How To Handle Emotional Triggers
👩💼 Hi, I'm Jodi Carlton, a leading world expert on adult #neurodiverserelationship dynamics and interpersonal #communication. I am a seasoned professional with 20+ years of experience as a #therapist and #relationshipcoach specializing in #autism, #ADHD, #anxiety, #depression, and #abuse. I am #trauma certified and trained in Accelerated Resolution Therapy and hypnosis.
MY PERSONAL STORY: Although I have professional counselor education and training, my life experiences in my own neurodiverse marriage, as a parent to my #autisticdaughter and #adhd son, and my relationships with other neurodiverse family and friends have been my personal training ground. I am also a survivor of narcissistic abuse and have experienced the narc abuse cycle in multiple relationships. I have battled and healed from the codependency that results from having an abusive childhood.
QUIZZES: I have developed customized quizzes for you to identify traits of neurodiversity as well as toxic personality traits in partners. Take a free quiz at: http://jodicarlton.com
COMPREHENSIVE RELATIONSHIP EVALUATION: Assesses both partners to highlight unique traits and characteristics in areas such as personality, sensory processing, logic & reasoning, empathy, memory, problem-solving, and more. This data reveals how a couple's differences are affecting their relationship. The purpose is not to identify one partner as "abnormal," but to understand how partners are different from one another.
COACHING: My mission is to help you get clarity about yourself and your relationships to make informed choices, heal from your own pain, and improve your overall quality of life. I coach individuals, couples, and families worldwide using a solution-focused approach that results in life-altering answers and real change. 🎙
PODCAST: Listen to the "YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship" podcast, which has been downloaded in over 70 countries on your favorite podcast platform or watch it on YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLSyXJdjUav7pSwpq7nmSdEQZMwiI3eqHR
💁♀️ COMMUNICATION COURSE: The world's first program that facilitates life-altering clarity and change for neurodiverse partners and couples who are stuck in a cycle of rehashing confusing and painful conflict and shutdown. http://CracktheCommunicationCode.com
🌐 Visit me online at JodiCarlton.com to learn more and for more resources.
📱 FOLLOW ME and SUBSCRIBE: YouTube: @jodicarlton Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok: @thejodicarlton
LinkedIn: Jodi Carlton

Feb 7, 2024 • 4min
Boundaries and Dealbreakers in Neurodiverse Relationships
In the bonus episode, neurodiverse relationship expert, Jodi Carlton, explores the crucial aspects of setting boundaries and recognizing deal-breakers in neurodiverse relationships.
00:00 Introduction
00:17 Understanding Boundaries in Relationships
01:12 The Difference Between Boundaries and Control
01:46 Setting Boundaries in Response to Negative Behavior
02:00 Teaching Boundaries to Children
02:46 Challenges of Setting Boundaries with Smart Kids
03:06 Conclusion: Modeling Boundary Setting