The Art of Charm

In today’s episode, we cover flow state with Steven Kotler. Steven is the founder and executive director of the Flow Research Collective, and is the author of nine international bestsellers including The Rise of Superman and Stealing Fire, and has a new book, The Art of Impossible - A Peak Performance Primer, coming out this month. Flow state is an amazing aspect of the human experience that can boost your productivity to untold levels, but why is it also important to our happiness and strength as a community, how do you tap into it in your daily life, and what is the biggest myth surrounding flow state? What to Listen For Steven Kotler’s Introduction - 0:00 What is Flow State and How Do You Get Into It - 10:40 What is flow state and how do you get into it? What is flow state and why is it important for our satisfaction and community strength? What are the 6 core characteristics of flow state? Why does time seem to slow down when in flow state? Are we doing damage to our children by not pushing them to play outside and experience the flow state early on? What happens biologically when we find ourselves in flow state? What are flow triggers and how can we use them to get into flow when we most need it? What is the first rule of improv and why is it integral to getting into flow state in a conversation? The Myth About Flow State - 31:45 What is the biggest myth around flow state? Taking Care of Your Mind When You’re Pushing Yourself - 33:46 What can you do if you are worried about burn out? How are anxiety and flow state connected, and what can you do to manage your anxiety so it doesn’t kill your flow state? Why do affirmations not work while gratitude does work? What is the difference between active recovery and passive recovery and why does one pale in comparison to the other? Entering into flow state used to be something associated with artists and athletes, but science has shown it is accessible to anyone with the ability to focus. Being in a flow state is a result of focusing on a task to the point where you’re not trying to think - all of your thoughts and actions simply flow. But tapping into your flow state, as with anything, requires consistent practice with whatever it is you are doing, and a willingness to focus without distraction. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Steven Kotler’s website The Art of Impossible: A Peak Performance Primer by Steven Kotler Stealing Fire by Steven Kotler Passion Recipe Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover how to conquer addiction with Doug Bopst. Doug is an award-winning personal trainer, author, speaker, and business owner, who turned his life around from felon and drug addict to help countless individuals build the confidence and strength to succeed in life. Substance abuse and addiction goes beyond simply using drugs to experience a temporary high, so what can you do to identify the cause of an addiction, how can you rebuild your life after addiction, and why is physical exercise so important in the recovery process? What to Listen For Doug Bopst’s Story - 0:00 What made Doug turn his life around after being convicted of a felony? How did Doug Bopst’s childhood lead to addiction and crime? Improving Your Life After Addiction - 8:25 (Starts with Johnny saying, “If that energy isn’t channeled…”) What can you do to remove toxic relationships from your life? How do you leave one social circle to build a new one? What do you look for if you want to make new friends that won’t lead you down a path dangerous to your future? Conquering Addiction - 21:50 (Starts with AJ saying, “What I want to talk about is…”) How do you break an addiction without simply ending it and replacing it with another as many do? Why is physical exercise so important when it comes to maintaining a healthy body and mind in addiction recovery? What can you do to build will power so you can build a healthier lifestyle to replace your addiction? Building Relationships After Addiction - 31:55 (Starts with AJ saying, “Absolutely, that deep why is such an important part…”) What can you do to repair the bridges you burned while you were battling addiction? What happened to the cellmate who inspired Doug Bopst to turn his life around and become the best version of himself? The source of addiction is not simply wanting a high, but filling a void that can exist in all of us due to pain, trauma, loss, a lack of love, etc. What this means for those suffering from addiction is that the pain is still there even if you stop abusing the substance in question. Addicts use in order to fill that void, so to properly recover, you must find a healthy way of slowly filling the emptiness with a love for yourself. You must become the source of your own fulfillment and happiness. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Doug Bopst website The Adversity Advantage Podcast - hosted by Doug Bopst From Felony to Fitness to Free: Everybody deserves a second chance AoC Podcast - BJ Fogg | The Biggest Myth About Habit Formation Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Discover the biggest relationship myths and why dating apps may hinder finding true connections. Learn about emotional bids and the DEEP framework to improve relationships. Develop actionable goals with your partner and work on 4 key skills for a healthy relationship. Explore the importance of communication and understanding differences to strengthen connections.

In today’s episode, we cover the breaking and creation of habits with BJ Fogg. BJ founded the Behavior Design Lab at Stanford University and teaches industry innovators how human behavior works. There are plenty of misconceptions floating around the internet surrounding making and breaking habits, so what is the biggest one, what does the science actually say about habit formation, and what can you start doing today to break those bad habits you’re feeling stuck with? What to Listen For What is Behavior Design and how can you use it to become the best version of yourself? What is the Tiny Habits method and how can we implement it now to start creating long lasting habits? Why is it important to start implementing a new habit by making it as easy as possible? What is the biggest myth about habit formation? Why can habit trackers be detrimental to healthy habit development? What is the secret to promoting positive behavioral changes in your kids? What is the difference between habit and compliance and why is one detrimental in the long run? Why are positive emotions so significant in the creation of new habits and how can we use that knowledge to build better habits faster? What are the 3 phases to getting rid of unwanted habits? What 2 strategies can you use to reduce your weekly screentime and be more present in social situations? Habit formation is not as simple as just doing something for a specific number of days. Many of us know there are things we only had to try once or twice before we started doing them everyday because it only took one or two times to recognize how good doing those things made us feel. Because we as humans don’t fully incorporate behavioral changes unless we want to, we must recognize and feel the positive impacts a new behavioral change will have in order to solidify it. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode BJ Fogg’s website Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg How are habits formed: Modelling habit formation in the real world Stanford’s Screentime Genie Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover mindset and determination with Joe De Sena. Joe is the CEO and founder of Spartan and the Death Race, and the NY Times best selling author of Spartan Up, Spartan Fit, and The Spartan Way. Success is never a straight path nor is it attained with ease, so if you want to increase your chances of success and improve your luck on the way up, what mindset should you adopt, how should you treat your body daily, and what can you learn from others who have come before you? What to Listen For What lessons did Joe De Sena learn from a crime boss as a kid that helped him achieve his success as CEO and founder of Spartan and the Death Race? What can you do to attract and keep amazing mentors who can steer you toward success and away from unnecessary failure? What 7 simple steps can you take everyday to live a long, healthy life? How did Joe De Sena’s career on Wall Street lead into his founding of Spartan races? What can you do to stay focused on the success of your business during the early stages when you’re not turning a profit? How did Joe De Sena’s 10 Spartan principles come together? What can you do to stay optimistic when it feels like the world is falling apart around you? Challenge and adversity are not just great for building well rounded humans, but for proving to ourselves how badly we want something. Whether it’s achieving peak physical condition, a world class level professional skill set, building a thriving international business, and anything in between, you must apply yourself consistently over a long period of time to get anywhere close to the goal, and even then there are countless factors out of your control that could knock you down and prevent you from reaching the finish line. You must be willing to push through the days when you’re just not feeling it, everyone is doubting you, and life isn’t giving you a break. But even that mindset is not created overnight, so let’s get to work on building it today. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Joe De Sena’s website Joe De Sena on Twitter Spartan Races The Spartan Way by Joe De Sena Spartan Up! by Joe De Sena Spartan Fit! by Joe De Sena Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we highlight the best moments of our podcast from 2020. It’s the end of 2020, so we’re celebrating it with a selection of our greatest moments ranging from speaking up for yourself to forging deeper connections to cultivating your charisma. What to Listen For What subtle mindset shift can you use to start speaking up for yourself without coming across like a jerk? How can you advance your career even if you are a humble person? Why do we self-sabotage in our professional and personal lives and what can we do to stop? What does everyone get wrong about the concept of self-sabotage? What can you do to cultivate motivation and discipline within yourself? What principles can you start implementing today to forge deeper connections with everyone in your life and everyone you will meet? What simple yet powerful question can you ask people to learn more about them and give you more stepping stones to deeper conversation? Why are humans so bad at dealing with uncertainty and what can we do to better handle uncertainty in our everyday lives? What are some easy ways to practice mindfulness and gratitude? What techniques can you use to instantly boost your charisma no matter what situation you find yourself in? Why is enthusiasm important to your charisma and what can you do to create it? What can you do to be more optimistic and positive even in situations where you don’t feel it? This year has been a wild ride, but in every crisis lies an opportunity to become a stronger and wiser person. We can let times of stress break us, or we can use them to help us get closer to who we want to be in this life. Troubling times are inevitable in the existence we live in, and while it’s not always easy, we should always strive to be thankful for the adversity life throws at us, as they are the key to showing us who we really are and what we are capable of. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode The Art of Overcoming Procrastination with Adam Grant How to Give without Getting Taken Advantage of with Adam Grant How to Stop Self-Sabotage with Judy Ho Toolbox: The Myth About Friendship and 3 Ways to Make a Deeper Connection Dan Harris | The Art of Mindfulness for Skeptics The Art of Charisma Toolbox Episode Meditation For Fidgety Skeptics: A 10% Happier How-To Book by Dan Harris Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover business leadership with Robert Rosenberg. Robert was the chief executive officer of Dunkin' Donuts for thirty-five years from 1963 to 1998 and is the author of Around the Corner to Around the World: A Dozen Lessons I Learned Running Dunkin Donuts. Running a business can teach anyone a lot about themselves and life, so what can we learn about leadership skills, social skills, and business management skills from the CEO of one of the most successful American businesses? What to Listen For What can you do to develop leadership skills coming out of school and entering the business world for the first time? How should you view failure when starting and running a business, and why can a fear of failure lead you away from success? What can you do when stepping into a leadership role to earn the respect you need to be a great leader? How did Robert M Rosenberg develop his excellent leadership skills during his successful career as the CEO of Dunkin’ Donuts? What 3 hiring lessons can you take away from the CEO of one of America’s most successful businesses so you don’t waste time and money hiring the wrong people? How important is culture when making hiring decisions and what can you do to make sure someone is a fit for your company culture? Why is it important to be willing to take responsibility for the mistakes in your company regardless of who might be directly at fault? Running a business can teach us a great deal about ourselves and life. A business owner must prioritize his business as well as the people he surrounds himself with. Just like in life, running a business requires consistent application of focus and cooperation with others who share your values. In addition, just like life, you must be willing to take risks and fail in order to become successful. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Around the Corner to Around the World by Robert M Rosenberg Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Former professional poker player Annie Duke discusses decision-making skills in this podcast. Topics include reading people, building confidence, preventing decision-making failures, and using techniques to make better choices. The episode provides insights from the perspective of poker players and offers practical advice for improving decision-making abilities in various situations.

In today’s episode, we cover leadership, integrity, and team building with Jake Wood. Jake is the CEO of Team Rubicon, one of America's most celebrated nonprofit organizations, and the author of “Once a Warrior: How One Veteran Found a New Mission Closer to Home”. Leadership is a skill that evolves with every opportunity we are given to use it, so what can you do to develop your leadership skills, maintain your integrity throughout your journey, and build an exceptional team around you that will have your back every step of the way? What to Listen For What does Team Rubicon do and what led to Jake Wood starting it? What can you do to instill integrity in your kids, or the next generation as a whole? What practices can you implement in your daily personal or professional life to maintain your integrity so you don’t go back on your values in difficult situations? Who should you look to in order to build leadership and team management skills so you’re not wasting your time fumbling in the dark? How do you know when to lead and when to follow? Why is storytelling important when starting and running a business, and why can avoiding it lead your business to failure? What strategy can you use to take on new skills for upcoming challenges in life? Life is one learning opportunity after another, and if you let the success of one get to your head, you can miss out on countless others. Humility is a crucial aspect of leadership because the best teams consist of members who each have different strengths, and the best leaders surround themselves with people who are better than them, thus allowing the leader to make the best use of his team instead of trying to rely solely on his or her skills. Great leadership and excellent cooperation are what allowed humanity to accomplish some of our greatest feats. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Jake Wood’s website Once a Warrior by Jake Wood Take Command by Jake Wood Jake Wood’s TEDx Talk Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover Acceptance Commitment Therapy with Dr. DJ Moran. Dr. Moran has a Ph.D. in Psychology, is the founder of Pickslyde Consulting and the MidAmerican Psychological Institute, and has helped thousands of people and hundreds of companies develop the skills for keeping vital commitments. Nothing will hit as hard as life will, so what can we do to better handle those hits and come back stronger and better equipped to handle the future while also striving to be the best versions of ourselves? What to Listen For What is Acceptance Commitment Therapy (ACT) and how can it help you deal with all the challenges and setbacks life throws at us? What is psychological flexibility and why do we all need it so life doesn’t crush us in difficult moments? What are the biggest challenges when it comes to changing our behavior and how can ACT help you overcome them so you can live the life you want? What questions do you want to ask yourself to figure out what changes you need to make and can make so you can be the best version of yourself? What can you do to take control of your life and lead a life based on your values rather than someone else’s values or society’s values? What is the Mindful Action Plan and how can you use it to implement ACT in your life to make the behavioral changes you want? What is counter-conditioning and how can you use it to embrace discomfort and “negative” emotions so you can start leading the life you want? A full range of human emotions is necessary to lead a fulfilling life, but many of us associate certain emotions with negativity, thus leading us to avoid or suppress feeling those emotions. Consequently, we then avoid the events or activities that lead to us feeling those emotions when those events and activities could be exactly what we need in order to grow as individuals, professionals, friends, lovers, etc. It’s important to be able to accept all of your emotions and develop a comfortable relationship with them and yourself so you can lead the life you want. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Dr. DJ Moran’s website Mindful Action Plan pdf AoC Podcast: Dr. Steven Hayes | The Art of Leading a Fulfilling Life Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices