DadAwesome

dadAWESOME   We’re on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We’re passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God’s awesomeness.  | YouTube |  Instagram | Facebook | Twitter   FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS   Join a team of 100 dads biking 100 miles and raising $100,000 for the fatherless locally and globally.  OUR MISSION: End fatherlessness globally. Every child with a man they can call father. (Malachi 4:6a "He will turn the hearts of the parents to their children, and the hearts of the children to their parents") VISION: We ignite a father's calling by connecting him body and soul with the cause of the fatherless and the heart of the Father. FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS will change your life by forcing you to look past yourself. On the one weekend when it's easiest to sit home and consume, we're going to push ourselves, cycling 100 miles, in response to our Heavenly Father's heart for the Fatherless. DATE: Saturday, August 29, 2020 MORE INFO: http://bit.ly/F4F2020   dadAWESOME FOUNDATIONS    We’re offering a FREE 4-part dadAWESOME Foundations cohort on Thursday nights in June. Join us from 9-10pm on Zoom to unpack the 4 dadAWESOME keys to adding LIFE to the dad life. Please REGISTER by Tuesday, June 2nd.   dadNOTES   We understand that the dad life is at times a very full life... Often it's easy to miss an episode or forget some of the key action steps from previous dadAWESOME conversations. Episode 123 is a new rapid fire format with the top-3 takeaways from the past three episodes.   Conversation Notes   1) One-on-one time with your kids  2) Take a Sabbatical 3) Spiritual Leadership Requires FREEDOM 4) Stop it! 5) Think About Your Wife 6) Laugh Together 7) "Am I doing things that I want my kids to copy?" 8) Losing focus on the most important thing… 9) Slingshot Faithfulness 10) Add more laughter to date nights (my personal take-away)   Links   Sabbatical Guide from Jeremy Shelton Awesome Marriage Resources from Dr. Kim Kimberling Register for dadAWESOME Foundations FATHERS FOR THE FATHERLESS DA Daily Text Message - text "dad" to 77222

dadAWESOME We’re on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We’re passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God’s awesomeness. Thanks for helping us reach more dads by passing along these resources: Subscribe to the dadAWESOME YouTube channel Text a few other dads and encourage them to check out www.dadawesome.org and subscribe to the podcast Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts Join dadAWESOME Daily – Simply text “dad” to 77222 to begin receiving a daily text message with prayers, Bible verses, dad tips & other fatherhood inspiration. Join dadAWESOME FOUNDATIONS  >> We're offering a FREE 4-part dadAWESOME Foundations cohort on Thursday nights in June. Join us from 9-10pm on Zoom to unpack the 4 dadAWESOME keys to adding LIFE to the dad life. I am Loved I am Intentional I am Free I Enjoy my kids Adding LIFE to the dad life >> RSVP here Jordan Durso Best known as Marissa Angelique & Isabella’s Dad. Jordan is also the Executive Director of The Legacy Center where they are relentless about moving people forward to achieve their ultimate potential. The Legacy Center fights to see individuals change for life and not just for the moment: To live Life on Purpose; To take every step with intention; To help people create a Legacy that their kids will want to copy. Jordan lives in New York city with his three girls. Conversation Notes 5:10 - Legacy Center New York - not just meeting physical needs, but meeting relational and family needs 6:45 - “This is what I want my kids to copy from me.” 7:12 - “Is there something I’m doing, God, that I don’t want my kids to copy.” 7:35 - Being the man that I want my girls to marry 8:20 - The stuff we see us do every day - I see my kids copy that stuff. 9:35 - Being intentional with finances with his kids 11:11 - Focus on now 11:50 - dad fail - losing focus on the most important things in travel and work 14:25 - Story of loss and pain of divorce 18:40 - “I don’t believe God makes all things happen but he makes all things good so if I give him my life and I give him my story and my situation I think he can make even this situation good and help people that are going through the same situation.” 19:40 - As I was in this stage feeling of being stuck, I felt like I was being stretched, and not in the good sense at first….all my friends... were passing by...God what about me? And I felt like God spoke to me that I was like this slingshot that he was pulling back and he was stretching me and though everything looked like it was going this way and I was going backwards, it was really preparing to launch me, and the farther back I went and the more I got stretched, the farther I’d go, so I just had to say OK and throw my hands up in surrender.” 21:18 - How to keep our eyes on what’s most important in the stretching seasons. - Make sure you have really good friends to be honest with. Get around guys who are stronger than you. Real brotherhood. 24:04 - Palm trees roots stretch and search deep toward water sources and interlock with other palm trees. Eventually storms will die down. Secure stance, interlock with other people who are going through the same thing sometimes. 26:50 - What are the water sources that would help a dad who is in a storm right now? Accountability, interlocking with others, reading the Bible, reading other great books by people who have also been through hard times. 28:24 - “God did it for him, could God do it for me? Let that question raise up and spark your faith…. Unbelief says some other time, but not now some other place but not here, for somebody else but not me. Faith says anything that he did anywhere else he’s willing to do here, anything he did at any other time he’s willing to do now, and anything he did for anybody else he’ll do for me.” Reading other people’s stories ignites our faith that God will do it for us too. 29:20 - In the business of helping other people get healthy, and I can only do that if I’m healthy.  31:00 - Dad wisdom time machine advice = date your daughters 31:35 - Create memories with your kids... travel with your kids 32:05 - Put your family first. The other stuff is not that important. 32:45 - Reflections on Jordan's father = spending too much time serving at church and missing many of the special moments with his kids. 35:00 - adding the goal of sitting down for dinner and pausing and connecting as a family. 35:55 - Giving the travel planning to your kids. Ask them to make the plans. 37:20 - Learning your kids love languages and speaking that language to them. 38:30 - Jordan's Prayer Links: Jordan's Instagram The Legacy Center

dadAWESOME We’re on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We’re passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God’s awesomeness. Thanks for helping us reach more dads by passing along these resources: Subscribe to the dadAWESOME YouTube channel Text a few other dads and encourage them to check out www.dadawesome.org and subscribe to the podcast Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts Join dadAWESOME Daily – Simply text “dad” to 77222 to begin receiving a daily text message with prayers, Bible verses, dad tips & other fatherhood inspiration. Join dadAWESOME FOUNDATIONS  >> We're offering a FREE 4-part dadAWESOME Foundations cohort on Thursday nights in June. Join us from 9-10pm on Zoom to unpack the 4 dadAWESOME keys to adding LIFE to the dad life. I am Loved I am Intentional I am Free I Enjoy my kids Adding LIFE to the dad life >> RSVP here Dr. Kim Kimberling Dr. Kim has been a professional counselor for over thirty years.  He is President and co-founder of Awesome Marriage. Awesome Marriage reaches thousands of people each month with God’s plan for marriage and relationships. Dr. Kim has been married to his lovely wife Nancy for 50 years. Together they have two adult married children and five awesome grandchildren. Dr. Kim’s inspiration and passion for marriage began at a young age as he watched his parents live out the true meaning of having an Awesome Marriage centered around God’s incredible plan. He is open and honest about the struggles he has experienced in marriage and uses these personal examples to help others. Conversation Notes: 3:48 - Dr. Kim Kimberling introduction 8:18 - What his dad did well.  10:45 - A difficult parenting moment 14:11 - “What I’ve learned is that if I put God first every day, it’s really easy to put her second because God’s not going to put anybody else in second place besides her because that was his design and plan. And when we are in sync, we really are good together and we can really see ourselves as a team and we parent well together.” 14:35 - “We sometimes don’t always value our wife's perspective. Our wives have an insight and a wisdom that we don’t have. God gifted them with some things especially relationally that sometimes don't even make sense to us but they are right and they’re right on.” 16:05 - “When you stick together as a husband and wife, you’re going to make good decisions for your kids and I think eventually your kids are going to see that.” 16:19 - Dr. Kim’s books: Seven secrets to a an Awesome Marriage: Strengthen Your Most Intimate Relationship and  14 Keys to lasting love Bible reading plans. Daily email. 16:55 - Top 2 things he’d tell a dad for how to have an awesome marriage. Stop doing something that doesn’t work, and seek God. Intentionally pursue your wife 19:38 - The idea of seeing the big picture. “What do you want their life to be? What do you want to impart to them in these years? And what do you want it to be when they leave? And what do you want it to be when they are adults?” 21:14 - Common patterns he is seeing that cause a dad to have a train wreck - Social media, video games as an escape. 22:46 - “My prayer is each day, what can I do to make Nancy feel like she's loved and how can I come alongside her today, and God always gives me an answer to that.” 23:26 - Dr. Kim’s instagram 23:40 - One Thing email 24:35 - Looking for opportunities for laughter in our marriage and parenting 25:30 - ”There is something in a kid’s eyes when you are laughing with them that is really special, you just see it, they just light up, they love that and it bonds them to us and connects us in really special ways. I think it’s a gift that God gave us. And a lot of times we don’t think about God laughing or Jesus laughing but they do.” The dad can be the initiator of laughter 26:30 - “Look at the eyes of your kids, look at the eyes of your wife. Are their eyes shining? And if they’re shining there's a good chance that you've brought life into their life.” - Jeff 26:49 - dadAWESOME purpose - To add LIFE to the dad life. 27:13 - Practical ideas for how to be a life-giving dad. Look for opportunities to go with them and talk with them - don’t expect them to come to you Be available when they want to talk - you need to go into their world.  Take advantage of open windows to talk, because if you don’t they will quit asking 29:14 - “Don’t be hard on yourself. We serve a God that is redemptive, that can bring good out of anything. ....God doesn’t want you to punish yourself. God wants you to learn from your mistakes and he makes us aware of them but to realize he’s got an answer and you can overcome that. Our kids need to see that we make mistakes and how we handle those mistakes. I think failure becomes failure if you don’t let God turn it around. But if you turn it around it becomes an opportunity to teach, to grow for yourself and for your kids and your spouse to see those things.” 30:05 - Dr. Kim's Prayer Follow-up Links: Awesome Marriage - https://awesomemarriage.com/ Daily Email from Awesome Marriage Books: Seven secrets to a an Awesome Marriage: Strengthen Your Most Intimate Relationship and  14 Keys to lasting love  Podcasts: Other Resources:

dadAWESOME We’re on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We’re passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God’s awesomeness. Thanks for helping us reach more dads by passing along these resources: Subscribe to the dadAWESOME YouTube channel Text a few other dads and encourage them to check out www.dadawesome.org and subscribe to the podcast Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts Join dadAWESOME Daily – Simply text “dad” to 77222 to begin receiving a daily text message with prayers, Bible verses, dad tips & other fatherhood inspiration. Jeremy Shelton Jeremy Shelton is a man on a mission to directly confront sexual sin in the church today. He does so with the belief God is using him to grab hold of those heading toward a slaughter. His new book: UNMUZZLED, exposes the grip of sexual temptation and sin like never before, and is set to be a game-changer for Christians in sexual bondage. He no longer just claims to be a Christian; he's now determined to go out and actually do what a Christ-follower does. He and his wife of eighteen years have five children and live in Texas. Conversation Notes: 4:38 - Asking other dads, “How are you capturing your child’s heart?” 5:05 - The enemy is after our children 6:15  - How to connect with your child’s heart. Intentionally turn off the job, stress, and be engaged 6:38 - Make a mental switch to turn off my concerns of the world. “Lord am I ready to be a husband and a father?” 7:38 - Man Time with his son. Create a memorable moment. 9:10  - Pursuing his daughters - Daddy Dates. 10:40 - Sharing a dad fail. 13:21 - Where are you choosing to put extra focus now? Time. “I am sacrificing business for time with my family.” 16:55 - Why take a “sabbatical day” away to hear from God. 19:00 - I liken a sabbatical to that. I go away every year for my annual sabbatical to hear the Lord on what I’m called to do for that year. It’s phenomenal when you get away to hear the Lord. My mentor said, if Jesus had to get away to hear the Father, how much should we?” 24:52 - "God did not design men to struggle with this (sexual sin). He designed us to stay away from it" 25:07 - "Your flesh is flammable. Sexual sin is fire" 25:20 - Proverbs 6:27 "Can a man scoop a flame into his lap and not have his clothes catch on fire? ...Can a man take fire in his bosom, and his garments not be burned?" 25:30 - 1 Corinthians 6:18 "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body." ... Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body." Three Steps: Stay Away Flee Escape 27:05 - James 1:15 "Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death." 27:33 - 68% of Christian men are living in sexual sin (Pure Desire Ministries) 28:00 - Prediction that 80% of church going men are looking at pornography monthly 28:30 - Story of being a Wet Match - "Today the church is flooded with wet matches who have a little belief God is actually going to show up in their lives. They sign up for or continue in Christianity as more of a life insurance policy than a personal relationship with God." 31:20 - Story of seeing Muzzles on men - they couldn't cry out to the Lord. They couldn't praise God. 31:90 - Washing ourselves with "cheap grace" or grace without Christ. 32:40 - How many men would say that they are leading their household as the spiritual leader of their home? I think the number would be sickening. They can't. 33:12 - Matthew 12:29 "Or how can someone enter a strong man's house and plunder his goods, unless he first binds the strong man? Then indeed he may plunder his house." 34:10 - A dad stuck in sexual sin can't do anything to help his kids who are stuck in pornography 34:20 - "it takes free people to free people" 34:50 - A dog with a muzzle can't eat, bark or bite 35:00 - Muzzled Men - “A Christian man in sexual sin…is muzzled. This muzzle renders him passive and powerless to participate in the Kingdom of God on this earth. It prevents him from becoming the man, husband, father, and witness he is called to be. This spiritual restraint mutes his connection to God. Worse, it incapacitates him from fulfilling his God-given purpose.” Can’t Bark - prevents him from becoming the man, husband, father, and witness he is called to be Can’t Bite - passive and powerless Can’t Eat - his spiritual restraint mutes his connection to God Deuteronomy 30:19 "This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live" 41:05 - "God will never stop stop chasing you. If you're heading towards destruction, you're following the enemy" 42:40 - Unmuzzled Book 43:12 - Jeremy's prayer Follow-up Links: https://unmuzzledmen.com/ Amazon - buy the book unmuzzled Guide for a Sabbatical Day

dadAWESOME We’re on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We’re passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God’s awesomeness. Thanks for helping us reach more dads by passing along these resources: Subscribe to the dadAWESOME YouTube channel Text a few other dads and encourage them to check out www.dadawesome.org and subscribe to the podcast Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts Join dadAWESOME Daily – Simply text “dad” to 77222 to begin receiving a daily text message with prayers, Bible verses, dad tips & other fatherhood inspiration. Jim Burns Jim Burns is the President of HomeWord and the Executive Director of the HomeWord Center for Youth and Family at Azusa Pacific University. Jim speaks to thousands of people around the world each year. He has close to 2 million resources in print in 30 languages. He primarily writes and speaks on the values of HomeWord which are: Strong Marriages Confident Parents Empowered Kids Healthy Leaders. Jim and his wife, Cathy, live in Southern California and have three grown daughters, Christy, Rebecca, and Heidi; two sons-in-law, Steve and Matt; and two grandchildren, James and Charlotte. Conversation Notes 1:00 - DA Foundations 1:50 - 10-Day Mom Awesome Challenge - https://dadawesome.org/momawesome 2:42 - Jim Burns intro - 45 yrs investing in leaders. HomeWord 5:00 - Home Word is the largest parenting ministry in the US. “Strong marriages, confident parents, empowered kids, healthy leaders.” 6:20 - Doing Life with Your Adult Children - unsolicited advice is taken as criticism. 8:52 - “Three good things” - On a birthday, say three good things about the person. 9:45 - “Relationships can’t all be super serious, sometimes they need to be serious fun.” 11:45 - Intentional changes he has made as a dad 12:58 - Being the transitional generation - you either recover or repeat patterns 13:51 - having an affair with his job 19:49 - “Some of the greatest mentors I’ve ever had are people I’ve never met” 21:00  - But if we parent too much on circumstance and chance and we don’t take a step back and be intentional about it, dads are really intentional when it comes to work, but at home they're just like ok so what are we going to do today. And I’m saying to dads lead, but don’t lead in a weird way, lead by being intentional. And so you be the person who is most fun, you be their greatest cheerleader, but at the same time don’t be letting your wife do all the discipline and you try to be Disney Land dad because you don’t know what to do, or you want to be liked, or your too tired because you had a hard day at work…. 24:05 - “I’m still to this day not a confident parent, but I look back  and go wow, some of those decisions we made were good decisions.” - comparison with working out. 24:48 - Having intentionality around sexuality. 26:12 - “The more positive, values centered sex education kids receive at home, the less promiscuous they will be and actually the less confused.” 29:05 - “When a dad is intentional with his daughter, with his time, not about sex, the questions will come easier.” 33:58 - Two areas he would have nudged himself to put more focus when the kids were little: Engage them more spiritually, and appreciate the moments with them.  “Kids are leaving the church, but there is a 300% better chance that kids will stay in the church if they have faith conversations in the home.” 36:25 - Be intentional about finding mentors - start finding time with people who you respect.  Video Interview: https://youtu.be/MCc_sovSJ0g Links: HomeWord Jim's Blog on Marriage and Family Jim's books: Amazon  

dadAWESOME We’re on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We’re passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God’s awesomeness. Thanks for helping us reach more dads by passing along these resources: Subscribe to the dadAWESOME YouTube channel Text a few other dads and encourage them to check out www.dadawesome.org and subscribe to the podcast Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts Join dadAWESOME Daily - Simply text "dad" to 77222 to begin receiving a daily text message with prayers, Bible verses, dad tips & other fatherhood inspiration. Moses Ehambe After thirteen years of playing professional basketball all over the world, Moses is now the Senior Assistant to Athletic Director at Oral Robert University. Moses and Sarah have 5 kids. Living the DREAM one moment at a time. 🇺🇸 🇨🇳 🇪🇸 🇻🇪 🇩🇪 🇯🇵 🇲🇦 🇶🇦 🇫🇷 🇷🇺 🇺🇸 TeamEhambe 👨🏿‍🦱👩🏽‍🦱👧🏽👧🏽👦🏽🧒🏽👶🏽 Conversation Notes 6:36 - How do you talk to your kids about inner beauty? 7:43 - He has enrolled his son in “Gentleman’s University.” 8:49 - “What time is it? It’s right now. Where are you at? You’re right here. What do you have? You only have this moment. We try to take advantage of the present moment with our kids.”  Be in the moment and present as much as possible with our kids 11:45 - As a dad, it is our job to mimic the qualities Jesus had on earth so our kids can know what God is like “God loves me, God protects me, God thinks I’m special….I mean the world to God. This is the most important part of parenting.” 14:00 - We are called to be great because he has placed greatness in us but with placing that greatness in us the greatest loss in life is when something great inside you dies while you are still alive. In order to tap into that greatness and pull it out: trust, obedience and support... Prov. 3:5-6 - Trust in the Lord with all your heart - and he will direct your paths. He will direct your paths in parenting. The greatness that we’ve been given as parents is just being great parents. How do we do that? We trust in God. 15:15 - Obedience. When God tells us to do things, we need to obey even if we don’t understand it. 16:40 - As parents we need support and need to stay lifted and encouraged 17:15 - It’s the support system (podcasts, friends from church, communities) that help lift you up and get that head trash out of your mind so that way you can live your best life and be the best parent that God has called you to be. 18:41 - Speaking life. Thinking life. Our words have power. 19:31 - “Control your thoughts, control your words, because they will become who you are and your habits.” 19:50 - Gentlemen’s university - protect girls emotionally and physically - speak life 21:38 - Having emotional flexibility - whenever negative thoughts come in, don’t pay heed to them. Speak three positive things to get that negative trash out of your mind. 24:33 - Chosen tv series 25:15 - Seeing the glass half full in the midst of a pandemic. How can we see the good in what is happening right now? 27:34 - Instagram @mosesehambe 28:14 - Moses’ prayer for his kids: “God help us to love each of our children the way that they feel loved” 29:35 - “With us as dads, before we can pour into our kids we need to get filled, before we can pour out we need to be filled as well.” Links: Moses on Instagram Oral Roberts University  YouTube Clip of Moses Ehambe proposing to Sarah Meyer on Valentines Day at their Homecoming basketball game at Oral Roberts University! Watch and witness their first kiss!  (Over 500,000 views) Parents Working From Home - Quarantine Edition | Team Ehambe (Neek Films)

dadAWESOME We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. Thanks for helping us reach more dads by passing along these resources: Subscribe to the dadAWESOME YouTube channel Text a few other dads and encourage them to check out www.dadawesome.org and subscribe to the podcast Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts John Eldredge John Eldredge is an author, a counselor, and a teacher. He is also president of Ransomed Heart, a ministry devoted to helping people discover the heart of God, recover their own hearts in God's love, and learn to live in God's Kingdom. John and Stasi live in Colorado Springs and he loves the outdoors passionately. His most recent book, Take Your Life Back provides a refreshingly simple guide to recover your life. By practicing a few wonder­fully simple practices—or what John calls “graces”—you can begin to recover your soul, disentangle from the tragedies of this broken world, and discover the restorative power of beauty. Conversation Notes 5:57 - Most recent book: Get your Life Back by John Eldredge - 6:30 -  “I had no idea how fast I was running and how little margin I had in my life.” 6:56 - There has been a war for our attention that has kept us from giving our attention to our loved ones. 8:00 - “I was noticing assault on us by the world was robbing us of the ability to be present... to anything.” 8:54 - Coaching tips for moving into the lifestyle of learning to nourish our souls. 9:37 - The Shallows: What the Internet is Doing to Our Brains by Nicholas Carr 11:44 - One Minute Pause App by John Eldredge - A simple mindfulness app (www.pauseapp.com) 13:00 - 1 Peter 5:7 - Cast all your cares upon him because he cares for you. 13:15 - “Human beings were not meant to live in isolation and we weren’t meant to live in a constant unknown. Learning to let it go (benevolent detachment)... is step one.” 15:15 - Steps to the App:  1) Release. Let it go. 2) Heal our union with God. Our soul is meant to be united with God. It’s been assaulted by fear and chaos. 3) Fill me with you, God. 17:27 - Prov 4:23 - Above everything guard your heart because out of your heart flows the wellspring of life. ….. “How your heart’s doing affects everything else in your life. If your heart’s not doing well, you don’t love very well, if your heart’s not doing well you don’t have a lot of dreams. It is the epicenter.” 18:38 - “We are reaping the fruit of a lot of human brokenness generationally….Many kids are growing up either without a dad present, or without a present dad. He might be taken home, but he’s so taken out himself.” 18:58 - Carl Jung - “The greatest psychological impact of a parent on a child is the unlived life of the parent….. If you’re taken out, it’s really hard to chase after the hearts of your kids.” 19:27 - Parent for behavior vs. Parent for the heart 19:51 - “I am in a world at war. The fight is for the heart. Not only mine but everybody else’s.” 20:15 - Fathered by God by John Eldredge 20:42 - Gender identity is bestowed by the father. 21:09 - Both the little boy and little girl look to the father to answer their core questions. Boys - Do I have what it takes? Girls - Do you delight in me? Will anyone fight for me? 21: 30 - “God steps in to say, ‘Look, I can still Father you. I can take you on the journey of maturation. You need to know you’re a beloved son, you need to know that you’re a delighted daughter first.’” 22:45 - God takes us through stages to the place where he can entrust us with kingdoms and influence (a family, education, money, etc). Guys blow up their world because inside they stay in adolescence. 23:48 - John Eldredge podcast -  Ransomed heart podcast 25:20 - Listening prayer - asking God to Father us in the live moments - “what do I do with this? Help me.” 25:53 - A story of a painful moment in parenting. Maintain communication - don’t sever lines of communication. You won’t get a lot solved in this moment, but you could do a lot of damage. 26:41 - God rescues in the live moment 27:05 - How can we move toward hearing God’s voice in that moment? Know that you can (hear his voice). John 10 - My sheep hear my voice. Heb 3 - Today if you hear his voice Rev 3 - Behold I stand at the door and knock, if anyone hears my voice….  28:15 - Don’t try to hear the voice of God for the first time when it’s high drama. Start with really small questions when your heart is quiet.  30:00 - If your inner life is locked up, and shut down in fear and hurt, it is harder to hear. God is super merciful and he’ll speak anyways, but the [it will be more clear the] more that we can cultivate the care of the heart and healing of things that need healing in us. 30:54 -  “If your soul is dried out like the desert, God is trying to give you himself, he’s trying to pour out the love, the mercy, the words, but when the rain storms come in the desert, it can’t receive the rain because it’s just so baked.”  31:49 - “As you begin to unplug from technology and as you begin to recover an actual human life back, you will find it easier to hear from God.” 32:34 - “One of the keys to life is this: The way you treat your own heart is the way you will end up treating everyone else’s.” 32:55 - “If you are a perfectionist, your kids will feel the pressure to be perfect. If you are a person who wrestles with shame, they are going to experience that shame.” 33:31 - A dad fail. 35:30 - What you would tell your younger self - “You boys need to know you love them, and make that your top priority. You’re going to mess it up, everybody does...but love heals…...If your kids know “My dad adores me” then a lot of the failure stuff kind of bounces off. It really does.” 37:15 - Prayer for our families - dadAWESOME Episode 102 37:36 - John Eldredge final prayer over fathers. 40:10 - DA Daily Text (text "dad" to 33222) Links Get Your Life Back book John’s website John’s podcast One Minute Pause App Instagram Twitter Facebook

dadAWESOME We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. Thanks for helping us reach more dads by passing along these resources: Subscribe to the dadAWESOME YouTube channel Text a few other dads and encourage them to check out www.dadawesome.org and subscribe to the podcast Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts Share a post about @dadawesome on Facebook or Instagram #dadawesome Jon French After over 20 years of ministry in the local church, Jon now leads at Convoy of Hope as the Church Relations Director. He's been married for 15 years Dori and has 3 kids. Episode Notes 6:21 - A recent highlight moment. Kids being able to roll with the punches. 8:30 - 9:08 - “Frenches are Fighters.” We learn things in moments that affect us the rest of our lives. 9:40 - How to parent through a rare form of blood cancer. 1.5 yr cancer battle. 10:40 - Getting into the community through kids' sports. 11:25 - "One seed of doubt will give us 10-20x more fear and it can cripple us." 8 months of hardest known chemo treatment, full stem cell transplant, 21 day quarantine. 12:33 - We wanted to fight as a family. Sharing the levity of the situation but also not having them carry the full weight of the situation. 13:20 - “Frenches are Fighters. Frenches never quit.” The power of life and death is in the tongue. 13:53 - Kids need to know information. We try to shield or kids from the hurtful stuff but we need to pray and give discernment so we can let them in on the secrets [of our families.] 14:58 - Letting others and our kids into the process of pain makes it not just about us, allows our family and community to fight with us. 15:51 - The church came around and walked with them on this journey. 17:00 - God has seasons. It allows us to help others in the same fight. 18:20 - We all are walking through a situation out of our control. Are we choosing to be fighters? Who is fighting with us? 18:56 - How can dads be the head of our house? Set up connections ahead of time. 19:45 - Having foresight in lift to love others around us, then when crisis hits we can just continue what we’re doing. 20:06 - Pastor of 6 kids - how did you get such incredible kids? Every day spending 15 min with each kid. 20:31 - Giving 15 min/day to each kid. "We need to be building those every day small choices, that then lead up so that when the crisis hits we are already prepared." 21:00 - Ask and pray for discernment - where is our family going? What’s the core vision for our family and how do we get there? 21:25 - Listening to kids in crisis. They don’t need us to fix anything. How are they feeling? 22:00 - "You don’t just wake up one day and you’re a great dad. You don’t just wake up one day and you’re living your dream. It’s daily choices every day that get you there." 22:35 - "It’s time to put my cape on, because these kids need Superman.” - kids need a dad to love them and have fun with them. 23:52 - Convoy of Hope - giving generously to the cause of Covid-19 response 24:21 - Feeding 300,000 kids in 14 different countries, empowering women and teaching agriculture. Goal is to give 10 million meals given. 25:25 - Empowering the local church to support their communities 26:00 - Social currency is valuable - sharing Convoy of Hope supports the cause 26:27 - Creating a night-time routine to sleep. Reading a book to help take the focus off himself. 27:10 - “Are you willing to be generous in your time of distress?” - Thinking of others - who can I minister to? 28:15 - Getting our kids to buy in to the process of giving. 29:45 - We don’t need false humility. Humility is realizing how God made me and using it to the best of our ability. 30:30 - "Our awesomeness isn’t because we’re awesome, our awesomeness is because God created us to be awesome." 31:00 - There’s no such thing as balance, we have tension. The tighter we have tension, then the more we can balance. Need to have tension to be the most incredible we can be while still giving God the glory. 31:40 - Teaching his daughter to use her artistic gifts to the best of her ability because God gave her those gifts. God created the art so he could point back to him. 31:54 - "Keeping humility is saying 'I know who I am and I know who gave it to me and I’m going to use it to the best of my ability." 32:32 - Pride - “a false view of oneself." 33:20 - False humility can also be pride... We're still not seeing God how he created us 33:25 - "Humility is seeing how God created us and living in that" 33:54 - "I need to be who God created me to be at 100%. Not for me, but so god can get the glory" 34:40 - "Listen, dads. You are awesome. You are their only dad and they think you are the man" 36:13 - Praying promises over our kids 36:25 - "Our prayers and our words are the raw materials that our children build their lives with" Steven Steven Furtick 37:35 - Sticky statements that capture the promises of God over their kids 38:50 - Praying promises before bedtime 39:30 - If you didn't pray promises over your kids when they were little, do it NOW. It's not too late 41:04 - Start today. We're all a work in progress. Don't wait. 41:35 - Book - Draw The Circle by Mark Batterson 42:00 - "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord" Joshua 24:14 43:00 - "Is your house serving the Lord? If it's not, you probably need to go and look at whether you are serving the Lord as the dad" 43:35 - "As I go, so goes my house" 44:15 - "Sometimes we need to "heat check" our homes... Is my house stressful? Is my home arguing? Always yelling? Then back up and ask what I'm doing. How I'm leading, my house will follow" 45:00 - God has placed an incredible weight and responsibility on us as dads 47:27 - Jon's prayer Episode Links Convoy Of Hope

dadAWESOME We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. Thanks for helping us reach more dads by passing along these resources: Subscribe to the dadAWESOME YouTube channel Text a few other dads and encourage them to check out www.dadawesome.org and subscribe to the podcast Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts Share a post about @dadawesome on Facebook or Instagram #dadawesome Dr. Clarence Shuler  Dr. Clarence and Brenda are parents to three young adult daughters (he’s the minority in their sorority), author, marriage counselor, speaker, and life & relationship coach. He is the President/CEO of BLR: Building Lasting Relationships. For nearly 35 years, Clarence and Brenda have conducted marriage, discipleship, men’s, women’s, and single seminars internationally. They are members of FamilyLife Weekend To Remember Marriage Conference Speaker Team. Recently, Clarence was a marriage expert on Oprah Winfrey’s Love Goals reality show.  Episode Notes 1:00 -  PRAYER from 2 Corinthians 12:9 "But he answered me, “My grace is always more than enough for you, and my power finds its full expression through your weakness.” So I will celebrate my weaknesses, for when I’m weak I sense more deeply the mighty power of Christ living in me" 2:12 - thanks for sharing dadAWESOME on social media 2:30 - check out the YouTube channel: https://bit.ly/YouTubeDAsubscribe 3:00 - DA Daily - text the word "dad" to the number 33222 3:30 - Jeff's introduction of Dr. Clarence Shuler  4:55 - Dr. Clarence introduces himself (see bio above) 6:06 - Being a dad to three girls 7:20 - "The most important thing any dad can do is spend more time with their kids" 7:30 - "Quality time comes from quantity of time" 8:15 - Be accessible. Keep the door open. 8:45 - Love your kids mother. When kids see a dad love their mother it gives the kids important security 9:22 - Marriage tips 9:30 - "How I treat my wife is a reflection of how I love God" 9:50 - Pray with your wife 9:55 - "That closeness with your wife lets her bloom. She can't be the woman God designed her to be until she feels security from us" 10:25 - Be a servant leader 12:03 - My girls belong to God. I'm just a steward. 12:20 - What we do with our kids impacts our children's children. You're impacting generations 13:52 - Importance of focussing on your kids from birth through 10 years old 14:30 - The value of mentorship 15:00 - Spotting a mentor that he pursued  16:00 - You can get a lot of wisdom from your wife if you're brave enough to ask for it 16:25 - Learning to apologize to your kids  17:12 - The Fatherhood Commission 18:15 - Learning to heal the father wound 18:50 - Writing a letter to your dad... Bringing closure and healing. 20:00 - The video about honoring your father and writing intentional letters: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l-wG04x288c 20:30 - The Book "Choose Greatness" 21:00 - I wrote this book because I wanted to spend more time with my mentor and spiritual father 23:00 - This book was written for a 10 year old boy through men in their 20's 24:00 - Steps towards growing a mentor relationship into a spiritual father relationship 24:45 - Older guys really love it when young men come asking for wisdom 25:12 - Go ask that guy... Don't hesitate to acknowledge something you see and ask that mentor for a meeting 26:30 - Time machine advice = spend more time and pray more with your kids 27:25 - You're launching your kids... You can't spend too much time with your kids 28:45 - The importance of dads knowing what their kids are doing on the internet 29:18 - Get someone to mentor you who is a leader 29:39 - Dr. Clarences prayer over all of us Episode Links Choose Greatness: 11 Wise Decisions that Brave Young Men Make Paperback by Gary Chapman & Dr. Clarence Shuler  Other books from Dr. Clarence Shuler Building Lasting Relationships 

dadAWESOME We're on a mission to add LIFE to the dad life. We're passionate about helping dads live fully alive as they lead their kids to God's awesomeness. Thanks for helping us reach more dads by passing along these resources: Subscribe to the dadAWESOME YouTube channel Text a few other dads and encourage them to check out www.dadawesome.org and subscribe to the podcast Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts Share a post about @dadawesome on Facebook or Instagram #dadawesome Pierre du Plessis Born in Johannesburg, South Africa, Pierre du Plessis and his family relocated in 1999 to pastor The Father’s House, a multi-cultural, multi-generational, and multi-site church located in Rochester, NY. Pierre is known for his unique ability to bring the Bible to life using vivid illustrations mixed with humor and practical life application. He is passionate about mentoring & equipping leaders, engaging all generations and encouraging people to experience God. He is married to his best friend and partner in ministry, Marlize and they have two young adult children, Chloe and Caleb. Conversation Transcript About 6 months ago, I met Pastor Pierre down in Dallas, Texas, and now, today we're recording a dadAWESOME conversation. On behalf of all our guests, welcome to the show.  Thank you so much. This is just a privilege to learn from you. So you're in Rochester, New York, but originally from South Africa, is that correct?  That's right. Yes, we've been here now 20 years in Rochester.  Two decades and you lead as the lead pastor of The Father's House in Rochester, NY. Will you help our listeners get to know you a little bit, Pastor Pierre, and talk about your wife, your family, your kids, and a little bit of what you're up to for leadership in ministry.  Yes, so as you already mentioned, I come from South Africa. Born, and my family, everybody they come from a deep line of ministry. If I say ministry I think to put the context of ministry, it's a Pentecostal, conservative Pentecostal home that deeply loved Jesus and believed in prayer. Those are the good things. So many other things that roll from it, right? But it's all good. When I was about 33, we came to the U.S. It was not a straight narrative, there's so much to it, and I think some of that is learning that getting to where God wants you may take some U-Turns and loops, it's not always a straight line. We came when my kids were still small. I've got two kids. My daughter Chloe is the oldest. She was I think about a year and a half and my son was close to eight months when we came over, Caleb. My wife, Marlize comes from a great house too. South Africa is interesting, because you have so many cultures wrapped together in a very small land space. I come from a very very Afrikaans Dutch family. My wife, same country, she comes from an English family. So, different culture, different vibe. I like the English people, they're just laid back. Coming to her was like coming home for me, it's just the vibe, the culture, her as a person. Coming to Rochester, NY, I came as the creative arts and worship Pastor of a small church here in Rochester. About two years into this, we had the opportunity to start leading the church, and the rest is history. It has been a phenomenal, phenomenal ride, and we are so thankful that God pointed to us and called us over.  That's amazing, and I know partially from my Lead Pastor, Pastor Peter Haas, and him talking about you, and even some of the leadership you do globally, even beyond, way beyond Rochester, New York, so thank you for all the areas you're leading in, but let's talk about leadership at home for a second. How old are your kids now? Are they out of the house now?  I hope they'll never leave the house. You know, the fun thing is that my kids are, my daughter I think is 24 right now, my son, almost 22. Right about then I know some of the people are now reverse engineering their ages, I'll go, I'm always off with ages and with stages. They are just amazing, amazing kids, because all kids do not come packaged the same, so I don't think looking at our kids and how they're turning out is always a reflection of how we got it right. I think, when I look at my kids, The Lord was very kind to us because these two young adults are phenomenal human beings, and I know the seed that's been sown over the years has been consistent. They are still living at home. When it was time for them to leave, I said to my wife, "I'm not ready. I'm going to buy a house that they will never want to leave." And I did. I did. But now my son talks about leaving, and I applaud that, because that's what he wants to do. We are a close family, we like each other a lot, we do.  That's what we all pray for, that closeness and a love to be together. Now, you mentioned sowing seeds. Just sowing seeds, I think you said consistency. Can you talk about, maybe if you had to prioritize a few areas of sowing seeds, and just consistent fatherhood to us young dads listening, what are some of the areas that you're like, "I would put extra focus there?" I think the tough thing is that both you and I have seen, and we see it in other people, but we ignore it in ourselves. By the time the seed comes up and you don't like what's on the land, you want to do a blitz of stripping it down, re-planting, and expecting a new result in about five days, otherwise I'm going to send you to a therapist. We want to change the harvest quickly, but we don't understand that it takes a long time to get the seed in. If you don't like what you see, it takes a long time to cultivate it, because I always say this to our team and to our church, "No human heart is mechanical, it's organic." You can't take out a pair of pliers and change wires and go, there you go, I told you, this is how we can fix you. We've got to cultivate what we want, and I think part of us as people looking back at our lives, I think if we don't get over ourselves early enough, then we take up all the energy to fix ourselves and we ignore to sow what we want in our children. It's amazing when the kid starts drifting, and you no longer have the reach and control you think you have. All of a sudden, you get over yourself really quickly, and you realize what's at hand. I would say to young dads, Just get to your issues, deal with your issues. They will always be there, but it can't be the main thing in your life. There's no greater joy when you see the best of you and your spouse reflected in the character of Jesus showing up in front of you, because at least you know some of that miswiring and brokenness stopped with you, you didn't pass it on to your children.   So you're really saying, don't focus on tactics externally, focus on God healing and bringing your stuff, so that it doesn't get in the way and you don't stay selfish. I appreciate that perspective. When you think back to, and because we named this show "dadAWESOME," we have to talk about a not-so-awesome dad moment. Can you think of a story like that you'd be willing to share, and just an area where maybe you caused hurt or pain, or you did something you wish you could have back with your kids and maybe what you learned from that forward?  Oh my gosh, yeah. I've got a tender heart. I will cry for days sitting here because the fact of the matter is, we see these things too late. Right? But thank God we can see them and be mindful that there's more of those things that are coming. I think one of the biggest things that I love to build things, do things. I'm always busy with my hands, always busy with my mind, I'm just wired that way. It is not a willful thing, it is just the way I am. So, my daughter was doing a school project, at the end of the school year when she was graduating, and she had to do a timeline narrative with family pictures to tell the story of her life, and she was sitting in the dining room area, and all the pictures and photo albums were on the table, and I looked at the pictures, and I became extremely sad. I was trying to wipe tears, and she'd be like, "Dad! You're too old to cry. Old people cry at the snap of a hat, what is up with that?" and I go like, "Baby, you don't understand, every one of these pictures, I can tell you what I was building, I can tell you what I was solving, I can tell you what I was confronting. I remember the pictures, but I was not in them all. I go like, "I can’t have it over. I was not present. There were other things more important and I think the reason why this is so sad for me is because I can never sit at the beach with a five year old building sandcastles again, recapturing the time. I would excuse myself and say I've got to go to the restroom to go on my phone to go capture something. I think it is like they say, "Youth is wasted on the young." I think children are wasted on prudish parents that don't understand that there is a lifetime to build things, once your kids go into their own orbit. There is a lifetime, there comes a day where you go like, "what are we doing?" They go like, "we know what we're doing, I don't know what you are doing." But while they want to be with you, be present. You can bulk your kingdom of sandcastles when they're out. For me, the biggest regret is not being present. That is my biggest regret.  Any coaching for us? Outside of just awareness, any coaching, whether it's classic examples like dinners together, do you have any coaching tips for us on how to be more present?  Yeah, I think, first of all, to know and get feedback on what you think is normal. I was raised Dutch. Dutch is very caring, but not as emotionally warm as my wife's family. So, in my family, the strangest thing is you would get a birthday card. You would never read it, because my parents bought it for the outside picture, not for the inside words. They never wrote inside the card but, "Mom and Dad." That's just Dutch. That's the Afrikaans way. My wife's family, when I went to the first Christmas, I didn't open the card, and she was deeply offended, because for us, we get to the gift. I know who it's coming from because I saw you give it to me. For me it was the label of who gave the gift. Oh my goodness, for them, it was nothing on the outside, everything was written on the inside. For us, we know we were loved, but we didn't express it in a physical way. My wife's family, they hug you to no end. They express love to no end. I had to choose what do I want my kids to experience? And because there was a feedback, because there was a moment, becoming extremely thoughtful in expressing love and words was a result of my wife holding up the picture of, "is this what you want?" She didn't force me, I go like, "No. That's why I married you, and I like this side of things." So I think to know that is important, especially when it comes to girls, because to the extent that they are loved by their father, they will not become restless to go find it somewhere else. Because it is the father's words that invokes beauty in the wife and in the daughter, and it's the father's strength and the father's kindness and connection with the son that establishes his manhood, right? And I think that if we become paralyzed as men to express what the children need, I think we don't understand what we are. The buckets are empty, and somebody's going to fill it.  I know this is a deep passion of yours, and the name of your church that you lead, "The Father's House." The idea of the past passed down, the pass through from our Heavenly Father, out of us as fathers to our kids. Can you talk about that a little further?  The thing that we love about God is that He is unconditional in his love and unlimited, and uncompromising in His forgiveness. When we like that about him, we don't find it as hard to give it through ourselves. I think part of being a parent sometimes has got to do with control. We want certain outcomes, and if we don't, we know how to manipulate with silence, manipulate with certain things, how to get it. I think the most important thing is for the children, at least in my book, for my children to always know, no matter what you decide, no matter what you say, no matter what you do, I'm always on your side, even if I don't agree with you, my arms are always open wide, even if I don't like you in this moment. You will always have a landing place, and if you can find me first, I will defend you even if you are wrong. And then we will fix and go apologize. There is unconditional safety and love, no matter what happens, and that is hard. But there is a scripture that says, "It's the kindness that leads us to repentance." Because every time I've gone to God and I think I'm going to get a whooping, I find a scripture on love, and then I go like, "what the heck, this hurts more." Because I thought I'm going to read some judgement over the shepherds right now, and then it's kindness, and I think what brings our children home again and again and again, if they know if they're going to get kindness at home. From kindness flows counsel, from kindness flows correction, but if they doubt that kindness, I think they'll bypass us in time.  That resonates deep, and right now, with my three year old, it resonates deep, so I'm thankful for those words. When it comes to shiny eyes, I love to ask the question about moments of wonder, moments of, you could tell your kids were living life fully. Can you think of any stories or moments for your kids, it could be a while ago, it doesn't have to be right now, but things that inspired shiny eyes from your kids?  Oh, you know, the thing that is so innate with children is those shiny eyes. Oh, and we bank that those shiny eyes are going to be with us forever, and they aren't with us forever, because we lose our shiny eyes, because life, and the reality of it all comes on us. But shiny eyes for me is a result of a carefree heart and spirit. Here's something that is so great about my dad that I deeply love. He has lived from a place of peace as a default, not as an exception. I live from a place of peace as an exception. So if you go like, "How many times this week did you have peace?" I would go like, "Twice, for 40 minutes." Right? It's a gift that complete place of peace. My dad's not like this. He believes that scripture says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but through prayer and supplication make your requests. Then the God of peace," He says, the God of peace is when you pray and you live from this place. I cannot tell you how many times he would sit at the table and eat, and he would just be burdened, and all of a sudden, he says, "I've just got to go pray through this, because my peace is gone." And for me, the default of the shiny eyes is when we can have a homestead, if I can call it that, that has the bliss of life, the unfettered, and just, If I could call it, I don't think it's the right word, but it's a lust for life. If we know how to leave things on the outside that always challenge us, we don't process the hard things on the inside, our castle is safe. In here we laugh, in here the goodness of God will carry us because I think, if we can protect that environment, I think that keeps the eyes alert. The wonder of life and spontaneity. I love it, and never more than right now. It's March 18th, today while we're recording this. I was just reflecting today with my brother, we're both young dads. In my years of being a dad, for sure, or my entire marriage, 14 years, I haven't walked through a week like this week, where peace is threatened. It just feels like the peace is threatened in so many ways. Now it's my role as a husband and as a father to be a peace bringer, a peace maker. So, could you just talk straight to me, how would you coach me this week?  So, here is the thing that is quite interesting. We live in a time where what you just said could be very offensive, because role identification is really complicated. But, you're talking to somebody that absolutely believes that God has assigned roles to us. When I say role, it's responsibility. How that role manifests I'm not going to get into, because that's where it can get all sticky. But there is a responsibility, I think, of a man. In the middle of the night, there is a sound in the basement, and you know you've got to protect the family. This is just me. If you put the bat in your wife's hand, you're like, "Honey, go get 'em." Right? If I'm your honey, I'll whoop you in the bed, then I'll call the police, and then, I'll have to find another honey here, because there is a moment here where a guy just needs to step up. But I think there are more than just the protection of the family when it comes to physical danger that guys need to step up. I think all the time in our culture, the role of the man has been diminished. It's unsure, uncertain, and I opened a door recently to a woman, and she was offended that I would think that she doesn't know how to open a door for herself. Now, in the culture I come from, it is the highest honor for a man to stand when a woman comes in to a room. You always open a door. When they carry something, you say, "Can I help?" Not, "You're weak." I honor your presence because you're a life giver to this universe. It's a different thing, and I think for guys in this season, first of all, I would say don't process where kids can hear. Because, they have no way to know what is processing and what is fact, what is doom, what is the end of the world. I think secondly, be careful what plays in your home. Ultimately they hear what you don't think they hear. I would limit what comes into the home. I would create joy in the house, and every time I speak of the future, I would speak with absolute optimism that God is with us, He has got the whole world in His hand, we are sleeping in peace tonight, we're going to be careful. As a husband and wife, especially as a husband, we lead our wives with certainty and reassurance, and we can't fake that, because there is a firm confidence that comes from a man who's talked to God. A firm confidence. When scripture is embedded in our souls. I say to people on Sunday, "Faith is not a product of positive thinking, Faith is a product of scripture that has been embedded in your soul. The way you do it is open the book and read it. Don't say, "I don't understand scripture." But you're fixing your car. If you can fix your car, you can read scripture. Just read it, because what it will do to you creates a firm foundation in the home that your family can lean into your strength, emotional, physical, and spiritual strength so that the house can be buoyant in the midst of what we believe could be longer than just two weeks.  That's helpful, and just last night, I was reading with my life this idea that trust, you don't trust a stranger, you trust someone that you know. So if we want to grow our trust in our Heavenly Father, we've got to be more than ever in His word, getting to know Him, spending time with Him in prayer. So that's driven us in that direction, this is time for game on, higher levels of trust. So let's get closer to our Heavenly Father.  You know Jeff, if I could interrupt, I think if there is ever a time where dads just need to tuck their kids in and lie on the bed and do shadow puppets, it is now. I think their hearts open when the lights are dim. I think the conversation will become heartfelt when you're just lying on the bed with them and just talk, just have fun with them, but 1-on-1 because family meetings is one thing, but they will never be vulnerable unless you create that time. It's not an interrogation time, it is proximity time. So I think if there's ever tucking in and spending time every night in proximity, it's now That's good. If I took a road trip out to Rochester, I drive myself out there and I sit at a great coffee shop with yourself, Pastor Pierre, and a couple other young dads, and you just had a couple moments to just drop some more priorities to us as young dads. We're sitting around that good cup of coffee, is there anything we haven't talked about yet that you're like, "I would want to pass this along." Not that you've got it perfect, but what kind of things would you say, "These are priorities?"  The power of your shadow is undeniable. You and I are both a product of the shadow we grew up in. Both of us. The very thing you said, I will never, you will see it in the mirror, and so will I. We don't like it, but it's there. The power of the shadow is very potent. A shadow is a reflection, not a projection. You can't project a shadow. You reflect it. Who you are is what you reflect. I would say, use the power of your shadow to be life giving to your children. If your marriage is not working, nothing else matters. If your kids are drifting, and things are not well with them, nothing else matters. I would look every young dad, including myself, in the eye and say, "Get over yourself. You can't say, 'Fix me then.' you shouldn't have had kids, shouldn't have married, if that's what you're thinking. We will forever be under construction. When you begin to realize that there's no do-overs, you won't have two and a half again, ever. What you invest in the two and a half is so critical to the harvest that's showing up on the field. I believe that scripture says, "The children of the righteous shall be mighty on the Earth." More than ever, we need a mighty lineage, a mighty legacy. Not to point back to us, but for the reflection of Jesus Christ on this planet. So I would say make them your highest priority.  Well, I would love to invite you to pray over us those exact themes, and this idea that we could be dads that are truly bringing life to our families. And the prayers around peace, and our homes being places of shiny eyes. So would you pray that prayer over all of us?  Absolutely. Father, I thank you that the eye of the Lord is on the righteous, and his ear is constantly leaning into our cry and our prayer. You are mindful of the season and the time we are in. You are mindful of the frailty of our human hearts. You are mindful of every dad. You are mindful of the concerns for the future, the weight of finance, the weight and concern of the well being and the health of our own families. And even the world that we are living in. But Father, I thank you that as the Spirit of the Living God rushed in on Sampson, as the spirit of God rushed in on your children to empower them, I pray that a surge of courage, hope, laughter, peace, will come into every heart and in every home. Father, that every father would just have a jolt of the reality that God is with us, God is for us, God will see us through, and that we can be the living expression of the invisible God to our children. Father, fill every man with wisdom, knowledge, and understanding, sensitivity of heart, that they will be in touch with the promptings of Heaven over their wives and over their children and over their neighborhoods. God, I thank you, that in our weakness, you are strong. Weakness has never been a problem for you, but God, just remove the fog so that we can lean into you, see you, and be the very conduits of your presence displayed through our lives. Father, thank you, thank you that we know that you have a vested interest in every man's heart. As they are creating this shadow in which things will grow in to magnificence or things will fade. Help us to be mindful to build life into our shadows, oh God, that whoever passes in or through it will leave from it empowered, validated, encouraged, and blessed. Thank you Father for your protection over us as people, and this nation, and this world. We will see the hand of God move many many many people in this season turn their hearts towards you, oh God. Including our homes, may we come in unity. Father, where marriages are struggling, I pray that you turn the hearts of the husbands back to their wives, and the hearts of the wives back to their husbands. That you would soften, for I declare your word says, "Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown." Jesus, let the storm in the midst it of it let peace reign. In Jesus' powerful name. Amen.