Men, Sex & Pleasure with Cam Fraser

Key Points:Introductions and backgroundLaura introduces herself as a psychologist and sexologist who works at the intersection of mental health and relationships. She shares her passion for art, the outdoors, and living near the ocean. Cam and Laura also discuss their astrological signs and the esoteric symbolism of water.The importance of communication in relationshipsCam and Laura discuss the importance of communication in relationships, especially when it comes to topics like desire and satisfaction. They note that while communication is often cited as important, people often struggle with how to actually have those conversations.Defining and distinguishing communicationLaura explains that communication refers to the verbal and non-verbal ways partners communicate about their preferences, desires, fantasies, and limits. She distinguishes this from general relationship communication, noting that communication is often seen as a "black spot" that is avoided or not handled well.The challenges and risks of communication Laura discusses why communication is particularly high-stakes and fraught for many people. Factors include the potential for rejection, shame, and vulnerability, as well as a lack of skills and comfort with the topic.Strategies for effective communicationCam and Laura explore ways to make communication more approachable, such as having smaller, more casual conversations rather than big "sit-down" talks. They also emphasize the importance of focusing on feelings and experiences rather than just acts.The role of non-verbal communicationLaura and Cam discuss the many ways non-verbal cues like body language, tone of voice, and physical touch can communicate desire, consent, and interest. They highlight the value of observing these cues both in and out of the bedroom.Using third-party tools to facilitate communicationCam and Laura share ideas for using activities, games, and other resources as a "third party" to help initiate and guide communication in a more playful, low-stakes way. This can help build curiosity and connection.Recap and key takeawaysIn closing, Laura emphasizes that effective communication has a protective function, helping maintain desire and satisfaction in a relationship. She encourages listeners to embrace the awkwardness and invest in developing these communication skills.Relevant links:Laura Lee's Website: www.lauralee.com.au

Key Points:George's background and servicesGeorge introduces himself as a 52-year-old male escort who provides a "sensual and caring" connection for women, often those who have not had intimacy for a long time. He explains that his services go beyond just physical intimacy, and that he aims to provide tenderness, affection, and a safe space for his clients.Addressing the loneliness epidemic Cam notes that George's services seem to address a significant need, as many women experience loneliness, especially those living alone. George agrees, stating that his clients often crave basic human touch and connection that they are missing in their daily lives.Debunking misconceptions about escort workCam acknowledges that there are many misconceptions about what escort work entails, with the assumption that it is purely transactional. George emphasizes that for him, the emotional and companionship aspects are far more important than the physical, and that he aims to provide a truly caring and nurturing experience for his clients.Navigating boundaries and authenticityGeorge discusses how he maintains boundaries and authenticity in his work, noting that while he uses a pseudonym, he is largely the same person in his personal life as he is with clients. He explains the importance of understanding each client's needs and desires in order to provide the best possible experience.Destigmatizing women seeking male escort services George believes that the key to destigmatizing women seeking male escort services is for women to feel empowered to acknowledge and embrace their desires, without shame or judgment. He advocates for more open and honest conversations around intimacy and human connection.Closing thoughts on kindness and curiosityIn closing, George emphasizes the importance of being kind, curious, and attentive in relationships, both personal and professional. He believes that these qualities are the foundation for meaningful connections and fulfilling experiences.Relevant linksGeorge Goulburn's Website:https://www.georgegoulburn.com/

Key Points:Dr. Frankie's background and passionDr. Frankie introduced herself as a clinical psychologist, board-certified therapist, and the CEO and founder of Little Gay Book and Little Black Book matchmaking services. She shared that her passion is helping people have healthier, happier relationships with themselves and others, and being a conduit to bring people together.Challenges with dating appsDr. Frankie discussed common themes she sees with her clients using dating apps, including feeling stuck in a "hamster wheel" of swiping without making real connections, misrepresenting themselves to appear a certain way, and experiencing disappointment when dates don't match their online profiles. She emphasized the importance of authenticity and setting boundaries when using dating apps.Navigating dating app dynamicsDr. Frankie and Cam discussed strategies for using dating apps more effectively, such as setting time limits, doing video calls before in-person dates, and moving quickly to meet up rather than prolonging messaging. They also explored the psychology behind the addictive nature of dating apps and the need to be mindful of how they are designed to keep users engaged.Advice for in-person datingCam and Dr. Frankie provided advice for meeting people in person, including the benefits of doing activities you already enjoy, giving thoughtful compliments, and having an "exit strategy" to gracefully end conversations. They also discussed navigating the transition from a romantic connection to a platonic friendship.Recap and closing thoughtsDr. Frankie expressed appreciation for Cam's work and the practical, real-life dating advice they discussed. She encouraged people to get out there and make in-person connections, despite any fears or self-consciousness, as most people are hungry for that type of human interaction.Relevant links:Dr. Frankie's website: https://www.littleblackbookmatchmaking.com

On this episode of Men, Sex & Pleasure, I chat with Tim Fisk from Complete Men. If you're interested in supporting our men's mental health initiative Men, Mates and Mentors, check out the following links: Website | Feb 24 Showcase | March 22 Event Key points: Tim's background and passion for men's work Tim introduces himself as a 66-year-old man living on the Gold Coast, and shares how he became involved in the Complete Man Foundation and the Rights of Passage program, which focuses on supporting teenage boys and their families through rites of passage experiences. Tim is passionate about this work as it allows him to heal his own younger self and model healthy masculine behaviors. The value of rites of passage and community support Tim explains how the rites of passage program takes fathers and sons into the bush for several days, removing them from everyday distractions. This immersive experience allows the boys and fathers to bond, communicate openly, and learn from each other. The program also includes ongoing community support and check-ins after the retreat, which Tim sees as crucial for helping the participants integrate the insights and changes from the experience. Tim's personal journey and the importance of men's groups Tim shares his own struggles with suicidal thoughts and the importance of being able to open up and share vulnerably in men's groups. He contrasts this with unhelpful responses he received when reaching out for help in the past. Tim emphasizes the value of men's groups in providing a sense of belonging, lifelong friendships, and tools for personal growth and healing. The Men, Mates and Mentors initiative Tim discusses the upcoming Men, Mates and Mentors event, which aims to introduce men to various men's support organizations and programs in the local community. The goal is to provide men with exposure to different approaches to personal development and growth, while also ensuring they know where to turn if they need support in the future, even if they don't engage right away. Closing thoughts and next steps Tim and Cam wrap up the conversation, with Tim inviting Cam to volunteer with the rites of passage program. They discuss the vision for expanding the Men's Mates and Mentors initiative to other communities beyond the Gold Coast.

From episode #84 with Andrew Gurza. More from that episode: - Andrew introduces himself - Ableism and creating spaces for learning - The sexual stigma of disability - Disability representation in porn - Considerations for sex with a disabled person - The depth of “yes” - Andrew’s relationship with care - Using social media to raise awareness - Playing with identity, femininity and masculinity - Assumptions about people with a disability

On this episode of #mensexpleasure, I chat with Milla Impola. Milla is a Senior Size Specialist at Global Protection. She excels in educating about sexual health and promoting body positivity. Milla's work with the FDA approval for anal-safe condoms, which was featured in The New York Times, highlights her knack for bringing significant changes to public health conversations. Key points: Milla's background and passion for condom education Milla Impola is the Marketing Director at Global Protection, the parent company of One Condoms. She is passionate about condom education and has a background in peer health counseling and working in the LGBTQ+ health space. She is particularly interested in addressing the shortcomings of abstinence-only  education. Condom sizing and the importance of fit Milla explains that One Condoms offers 52 different condom sizes to accommodate a wide range of anatomical differences. She emphasizes the importance of proper fit to ensure comfort and effectiveness, and discusses the challenges of overcoming the historical regulatory barriers to offering more size options. Milla also shares insights on how to properly measure length and girth for condom sizing. Innovations in condom materials and design Milla discusses One Condoms' use of innovative materials like graphene to create thinner, more sensitive condoms. She also talks about their "Flex" condom line and the company's efforts to make condoms more comfortable and pleasurable to use. Promoting condom usage through creative campaigns Milla describes One Condoms' various initiatives to raise awareness and normalize conversations around condoms, such as condom wrapper design contests, condom fashion shows, and partnerships with musicians and artists. She emphasizes the importance of making condom discussions fun and engaging. Addressing the needs of the LGBTQ+ community Milla discusses One Condoms' efforts to get their products approved for  use, including working with Emory University on a study to demonstrate the safety and efficacy of their condoms for this purpose. She also talks about their "Butt Stuff Approved" campaign and the importance of normalizing condom use for all  activities. Conclusion and next steps Milla and Cam wrap up the conversation, discussing opportunities for further collaboration and Cam's interest in trying out some of One Condoms' products. Milla encourages Cam to reach out if he or his audience are interested in participating in future product testing or research initiatives. Relevant links: ONE Condoms website: https://au.onecondoms.com/ 

From episode #84 with Tim Lagman. More from that episode: - Tim shares about his escorting journey - From escort to sex educator - Masturbation vs Self-Pleasure - Multi-orgasmic experiences - Anal play, rimming and personal hygiene - Edging techniques and strategies - Stereotypes about Asian men - The intersection of being Asian and gay

On this episode of #mensexpleasure, I chat with Avalon Lust, the provocative name behind scorching hot erotica that ignites passion and desire. With a focus on short, tantalizing reads, Lust's stories are crafted to arouse and captivate, perfect for those seeking to spice up their intimate moments. But beware, these tales come with a trigger warning, ensuring readers are prepared for the steamy journey ahead. So, whether you're indulging alone or with a partner, dive into Lust's world and let your imagination run wild. Key points: Avalon's background and writing journey Avalon introduces herself as an erotica writer who started writing after the pandemic, shifting from longer romance novels to shorter, more direct erotica. She discusses how her husband's frequent travel led her to seek out erotica over romance novels, as the erotica could be read when he was home. Avalon also shares that she draws inspiration from her own experiences, conversations with friends, and research to craft her stories. Exploring themes and characters in Avalon's erotica Avalon explains that her erotica primarily explores women's fantasies, though she has a sizable male readership as well. She covers a range of themes including group dynamics, role play, and elements of dominance. Avalon also discusses how she approaches describing physical attributes and intimate scenes, balancing realism with idealization. The benefits of reading erotica Avalon shares how reading and writing erotica has helped reignite the romance and intimacy in her own marriage. She also discusses the positive feedback she has received from readers, including one review where a husband thanked her for a "wonderful night" after his wife read her work. Avalon's writing process and future plans Avalon describes her current writing projects, including a holiday-themed anthology she is working on. She discusses the occasional writer's block she faces and how she overcomes it by stepping away from a project for a while. Avalon expresses a desire to be able to support herself financially through her erotica writing, though she sees it primarily as a passion project. Recap and closing thoughts Avalon and Cam discuss the benefits of reading erotica together as a couple, using it as a way to open up conversations about desires and fantasies. Avalon shares that her husband does read her completed works, providing support for her writing. Cam emphasizes the value of erotica as a creative outlet, especially for men exploring and expressing their . Relevant links: Avalon's latest book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0D9KRGKW9

From episode #83 with Luna Agneya. More from that episode: - Luna shares some of her story - Integrating spirituality and sexuality - Strategies for beginning shadow work - Cultural vs personal shadows - Integrating your shadow - Generational trauma - Shadow aspects of pornography - Advice for people interested in shadow work

On this episode of #mensexpleasure, I chat with Jenna Switzer. Jenna is a Holistic Sex Coach who helps you rediscover intimacy, playfulness, and sensuality in long-term relationships. With a unique blend of science, energetic practices, and real-life advice, she makes connection more fun and exciting. Jenna’s approach empowers couples to embrace deeper intimacy and rekindle passion in ways that feel authentic and enjoyable, both in and out of the bedroom. When she’s not supporting her clients, you’ll find her cuddling her Frenchie or chasing her next outdoor adventure. Key points: Introductions and background Cam and Jenna introduce themselves and discuss their backgrounds. Jenna shares that she is a holistic coach focused on integrating all aspects of a person's life, not just intimate moments. Cam emphasizes the importance of curiosity as a foundation for his work. Clients and common themes Jenna explains that many of her clients struggle with a disconnect or shame around their pelvic/genital area, often stemming from trauma or conservative upbringings. Cam shares his dislike of the term "dysfunction" and preference for more nuanced language around experiences. Reframing pleasure and intimacy Cam and Jenna discuss the need to broaden the definition of pleasure beyond just /genital experiences. They emphasize the importance of curiosity, presence, and exploring the whole body rather than just focusing on performance or outcomes. Practical strategies Jenna shares a practice of creating a "non-sexual pleasures" list to help clients become more aware of and intentional about experiencing pleasure in daily life. Cam describes a "pleasure mapping" exercise to help clients explore sensations across their entire body. Closing and resources Jenna shares information about her online community "Behind Closed Doors" and a free downloadable resource on her website called "Simple Pleasures." Cam and Jenna express their shared passion for helping people live more pleasurable lives. Relevant links: Jenna's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jenna_switzer/ Jenna's website: https://www.jennaswitzer.com/