The Mark Groves Podcast

This is 20 minutes jam packed with the most juicy breakup content you could ever need. Mark gets straight into the heart of it -- because this time effing hurts. It doesn’t matter whether you wanted the ending or not, you are hurting and we have all been there. Mark walks alongside you and helps you understand the hardest parts, the most painful parts, and explains to you that this rock bottom can be an anchor and a beginning of new possibilities for a deeper and truer connection to ourself and others. Get ready to rise. The Breakup Recovery Course Sign up Here Now! Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

This week we have Mark and Amy Young yelling about all things emotional unavailability! Every person has either been caught, is currently caught or will one day be caught in the spell that unavailable people cast over us. We explore why we get caught in the ‘spell’ of unavailable people. How Mark and Amy have both been caught themselves, and how can get unstuck from thinking you’ve found ‘love’ when in reality all you’ve found is pain and suffering. This week is the slap in the face you’ve been waiting for, do not miss it. Episode highlights: 5 mins - ‘Bottom feeder bro’ behaviour, why do we want the men who don’t want us? 7 mins - When the body codes drama as chemistry - breaking the spell of choosing someone who is not choosing you. 9 mins - When people are lying to you in dating. 13 mins - Amy’s personal story of the ‘bottom feeder bro’ - how she was going to ‘fix’ the ‘one’. 17 mins - Codependent no more - why Amy read it - why you should too. 25 mins - How you can break the spell. 30 mins - The 5 love languages - what when we have toxic love languages? 38 mins - Why we make excuses for other people. 39 mins - Don’t be afraid to have the hard conversations! 42 mins - When to communicate the issue or self-soothe? 50 mins - What energy are you bringing to dating - to Tinder? 52 mins - Are you ‘picky’, or not picky enough? 55 mins - Are there enough men? What’s going on with men and their emotions? Podcast links: Amy Young YouTube Create The Love Live in San Fran! Create The Love Live in LA! Create The Love Live in San Diego! Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

What are boundaries, why are they so hard? Why do we suck at boundaries with parents, exes, co-parents? Why don’t we just unfriend or block people that have hurt us? What is stopping us from letting go?! How the HECK do we do boundaries with our co-parent exes!? We tackle it ALL this week and nothing is off the table! Dr. Alexandra Solomon takes on the hardest of subjects with wisdom and compassion, if you haven't yet read her book find it in the show notes below. Episode Highlights: 3min: Boundaries, how to deal with boundary violations. 5min: Cultural differences in boundaries. 7min: Emotions and boundaries, childhood and boundaries. 14min: How do we know when a boundary is violated? 16min: Personal empowerment vs relational empowerment. 18min: Types of boundaries, secure vs porous vs rigid. 24min: Vulnerability cycles - what the heck are they? 27min: Voicing and breaking out of a vulnerability cycle. 30min: How to deliver a boundary. 31min: Tricky boundaries - exes! Why don’t we block them or delete them? 37min: Why don’t we just break contact - are we being kind to them or only to ourselves? 39min: BOUNDARIES AND COPARENTING 101 44min: How to hold space for your child - what impacts your child the most during a breakup? 49min: Types of families. Show Notes: http://www.dralexandrasolomon.com/ http://www.dralexandrasolomon.com/book/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Bryan Reeves is our guest this week and I am so excited to introduce you to a man who has truly lived a life of adventure and exploration. Bryan and I discuss his journey, from hyper-masculine army careerist, to wandering the Earth, and later to being a relationship and life coach. Bryan talks us through the journey that broke his heart, opened his heart and totally renewed his joy for life. Bryan and Mark go DEEP on all things masculinity this week. Why did Bryan’s girlfriends always end up frustrated and angry with him? Why do men follow Instagram models and damage their relationships with online behaviour? How can childhood emotional neglect - even the most subtle forms - play out in our adult lives? And what about our triggers, how can triggers from previous relationships or previous lives continue to impact our current partners. Mark and Bryan discuss the challenges that every couple is bound to face. Episode highlights: 6:00 - The journey from army career to relationship coach. 9:30 - Finding the subject that ‘lit’ me up 10:30 - Why are the women I am in relationship with always angry at me? 15:00 - Instagram and the online world affecting relationships. 22:00 - Childhood emotional neglect - how can the most subtle forms affect our adult life? 28:00 - What triggers us in our parents, what does this reflect in us? 49:00 - Therapy, coaches and relationships, the value of working with someone from outside of our relationship. 51:00 - Triggers from past, childhood and their influence in current situations. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

This week I was over the moon to be speaking with my dear friend Kelsey Grant. Kelsey is an absolute goddess on all things relationships, intimacy, and sex! We got really real on intimacy in every way, how sex relates to connection and visa versa. We got into the juiciest parts of relationship and shared our own pasts on the highest highs and lowest lows - commitment, patterns, past hurts, cheating, breaking up, growing and knowing ourselves. Episode Highlights 5min: Sexual intimacy and communication - whats the link? 8min: The vulnerability in sex - can you hide yourself and still enjoy climax? 10min: The differences between men and women when it comes to sex and connection. 12min: Integrity, cheating and shame. 14min: Pleasure and growth, how we change over time. 17min: Connection to self and ghosting, looking at it from both sides. When Mark was like a “Mt Everest Basecamp” of red flags 20min: Honesty in dating - are you dating just to date - to find a partner - to just have fun? 21min: Narcissism is a massive buzzword at the moment, but is it really narcissism? 25min: Taking responsibility in relationships and in life. You aren’t responsible for anyone else’s behaviour, but you are responsible for your own. 29min: The power dynamic in ‘saving’ someone. 32min: Breaking up and moving into a new relationship. 34min: Infidelity, the pain, the grief and the healing. 39min: Finding self love through our suffering. 43min: Mark’s ‘yoghurt and granola breakup’ story, what breakups are here to teach us. 54min: Kelsey’s relationship with a well known public figure - the deeper the connection the deeper the triggers and fears. 56min: Finding safety when we are in fear from past triggers. 59min: Trust and friendships with the opposite sex, does your partner trust your opposite sex friends? 1.06min: Family enmeshment and intimate relationships, they don’t gel! 1.10min: Getting started in making connections when you’re single - building the relationship skill set . Episode Notes Kelsey Grant - My entire life has been focused around relationships and how to get the love you want. As I’ve grown and shifted my ideas of what I wanted evolved as I did. The person I have grown into has given me access to learning, experimenting and through direct experience understand that which I was searching for in a relationship.   When I found it I thought that was it. I was done. That area of my life was complete. There was one catch though. I hadn’t yet learned how to really love myself. So the relationship ended. The universe works in mysteriously incredible ways. The breakup was exactly what I needed to actually for once look at my relationship to myself and understand I was at cause for all I was experiencing. I finally had to take a real look at my self confidence, self esteem, self worth and self love.   Through my journey of self love I was able to repair relationships of all kinds in my life, build my self esteem and self worth to levels they had never been before and ultimately begin to be the love I had be so intensely searching for in another. Once I was able to build this relationship with myself my love life flourished along with all the other areas of my life. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

This week I was honoured to be joined by filmmaker Brendon Marotta. Brendon has just launched the ground-breaking documentary ‘American Circumcision’ on Netflix. We had an incredibly powerful, raw and real conversation on the issue of circumcision. We went deep on the trauma, pain and often undiscussed power that circumcision still holds in our society today. This is a topic that deserves so much more investigation and I am so passionate about bringing this topic to light. Don’t miss this episode. Highlights 1min: Why did you end up working on the topic of circumcision? 4min: Circumcision is a cure in search of a disease - a cure for masturbation. 7min: The data behind circumcision. 10min: Women as supportive of the issue. 12min: Trauma and circumcision. 19min: The history of circumcision. 25min: The power of cultural conditioning. 28min: How and why is the conversation on circumcision changing? 31min: Who are the gatekeepers and powerhouses behind the conversation? 41min: Circumcision the documentary. 42min: Was there a backlash to the documentary? 49min: Healing from circumcision and early childhood traumas. 56min: Healing from grief. Episode notes Brendon Marotta graduated from the University of the North Carolina School of the Arts in 2010 with a B.F.A. in film editing & sound, where he worked in every major role on a film set. In 2013, he completed a year long Meisner Acting program at the Waterfront Playhouse & Conservatory. In 2014, a feature he edited was selected to premiere at the Austin Film Festival and won the Narrative Feature Audience Award there. In 2017, he completed his first feature-length documentary as director, which won Best Documentary at the Lone Star Film festival. Brendon currently lives in Austin, TX. https://www.brendonmarotta.com/ @bdmarotta Bonus features and full access to film at circumcisionmovie.com Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Matt Corker is a CEO, MBA and ’a magician of human experience’, this week he joins me to discuss all things leadership and business. We discuss Matt’s latest venture The Corker Co, and how he is crushing it in the business world, not only by connecting with people but also by connecting people to each other. There are so many synergies between how we communicate and manage relationships at work and with how we communicate and manage relationships at home - but too often we see them as separate worlds. We jam on the difference between being authentic and putting on roles for different contexts. How real are you at work and how is it impacting yourself and those you love? Episode highlights: 6min: People don’t quit their job they quit their manager, is this true? 8min: Fulfilment and work, being an entrepreneur vs employee, what’s the difference? 15min: Authenticity and the roles we play, how to we manage different relationships in different environments. 19min: Being real and communicating at work vs at home. 21min: Energy and motivation at work, how the time of day can affect how we behave. 32min: Toxic bosses, harmful management tactics and where do these stem come from? 36min: Formal company values, vision and mission vs the dynamic and culture in informal conversations. 41min: Talking about relationships, sexual relationships and sexual harassment at work. 48min: Working in “the office” and how our work space setups affect us. 52min: What is transformational really? Is it a buzzword or something more? Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

In this episode Mark Groves is joined by Stephanie Coontz, researcher, academic and author of seven books on marriage and family. They explore topics ranging from traditions, gender roles, the evolution of relationships in history and the more recent impacts of technology on relationships. Stephanie Coontz teaches history and family studies at The Evergreen State College in Olympia, WA and is Director of Research and Public Education at the Council on Contemporary Families. She has authored seven books on marriage and family life, including A Strange Stirring: ‘The Feminine Mystique’ and American Women at the Dawn of the 1960s, The Way We Never Were: American Families and the Nostalgia Trap. Coontz is a frequent guest columnist for the New York Times and CNN.com. Selected articles and tv appearances can be found at www.stephaniecoontz.com  Highlights 3m30sec: The history of marriage - what was it’s purpose? 8min: The difference between love, relationships and marriage, what is the role of coercion? 20m40sec: What is the history of monogamy and polygamy? 28min: The changing perspectives of being single, partnered, married and what is the role of gender here? 35min: The role of tradition and gender, how does it impact on the happiness of a relationship? How egalitarian are couples and how does this impact on happiness? 42min: Women having the courage to speak out and the #MeToo movement, how the times have changed. 45min: How has technology changed relationships and marriages? Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

In this podcast Mark Groves is joined by Dr. Jeremy Goldberg, writer, spoken word poet, marine biologist and PhD in social science. Mark and Jeremy discuss their personal evolutions as men, for Jeremy this has meant shifting from being an academic and PhD to becoming an artist. They also reflect upon the evolution of the modern man in today's world, what does it mean to be raised a boy today, what is school and society teaching boys, how do we break out of the stories and patterns and how we are all still on the journey home to ourselves. Highlights: 3:15 - What is going on with men and #MeToo, why aren’t more men speaking up? 7:00 - Why do men struggle to speak up on emotions- are men emotionally castrated? 12:00 - The evolving man in society - what is the cultural shift toward opening? 21:00 - The modern education system - what is it teaching and not teaching for the modern life? 25:00 - Step out of the ‘story’ you’ve been taught about life, or get kicked out of it. How Jeremy shifted from being a PhD to artist. 31:00 - The fear and courage experienced when stepping into the unknown. 34:00 - The ‘big betrayal’ and can you betray yourself? 42:30 - We’re all on the journey still - anyone who says they have it all figured out is lying. 49:43 - Risk, resilience and living on your edge - learn to be comfortable being uncomfortable. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

I’m so excited to introduce this week’s episode with my best friend and love – Kylie McBeath. Love, Service, and Wisdom. Those are the three words that Kylie lives by. Her greatest mission is to help more people unleash their greatness, and find truth and alignment in life through harnessing their best resource: their physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being. She is also a Certified Health Coach and Transformational Life Coach and she works to empower women to move through shame, release anger, and align with their most aligned + powerful selves. During this convo Kylie not only shares her relationship journey but also her journey as an entrepreneur and some amazing insights for how to grow into your voice, truth, integrity, and most true self. Highlights: 11:10 – Kylie’s journey back to herself 16:10 – Breaking through the limiting messages sent to women 24:50 – How fear creeps into relationships 34:00 – Stepping into vulnerability and honouring commitments 46:20 – Trigger points and getting our needs met 54:00 – Clean anger vs aggression Jam with Kylie: Instagram Zura Health KylieMcBeath.com Mate Magnet Book Links: Daring Greatly Breaking Free Loving Bravely Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands