TILT Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children

Adolescent eating disorder psychotherapists Zoë Bisbing and Leslie Bloch of the Full Bloom Project talk about how to help kids maintain healthy, normal relationships with food and their bodies and create a family culture of body positivity. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You may have heard me mention IFS, or Internal Family Systems, in podcast episodes before. My guest today is going to go into much more detail, but briefly, IFS is a powerful and compassionate therapeutic framework for understanding the different “parts” within ourselves—like the inner critic, the protector, the people-pleaser. Through IFS, we can learn how to befriend and heal those parts so we can show up more fully as our true Self. I’m pretty fascinated by IFS and have seen how transformative it can be in helping people truly heal and find more peace in their lives. In my research, I came across a therapist who not only feels the same but has fully stepped into the intersection of IFS and neurodivergence. So of course, I had to invite them onto the show. In today’s episode, you’ll meet Jude Carn, a certified Level 3 Internal Family Systems (IFS) psychotherapist, international consultant, and passionate advocate for neurodiversity. Jude brings a powerful blend of lived experience and deep professional expertise to their work, and in this episode, we’re exploring how IFS can be a transformative model for neurodivergent individuals and the families who support them. In our conversation, Jude walks us through the core concepts of IFS, explains how this framework can be especially healing for neurodivergent people—who often grow up feeling misunderstood, judged, or exiled—and shares insights on how IFS offers a respectful, empowering approach to trauma that allows each person to move at their own pace. Jude explains that recognizing and befriending one’s own parts can lead to deeper self-acceptance and a better relationship with ourselves. IFS has been transformative for me, and it’s really powerful to start from a place of knowing that you are not broken. Imagine what a difference it would make for all our neurodivergent kids to fundamentally know that they are not broken—and that no parts are bad. IFS can be a truly affirming starting point. I hope you get as excited about it as I do after this conversation.    About my guest Jude Carn is a level 3 certified IFS psychotherapist and approved consultant with the IFS Institute. Jude lives in the UK and works online internationally with some clients and mainly in supporting other therapists through supervision and consultation. Jude is a late diagnosed AuDHDer and an advocate for the recognition of neurodiversity as part of the human experience, rather than disorder.Jude creates and runs training, conference talks and groups supporting therapists to provide better support and care to their neurodivergent clients. She is genderqueer, and uses she/they pronouns. She co-hosts a podcast, Queering IFS which sets out other questions taken for granted norms around heteronormativity and neuronormativity as these present themselves in the world of therapy.Jude lives at home in rural Sussex with her two dogs and long term partner.   You'll learn: What IFS (Internal Family Systems) is and how it helps individuals foster deep self-acceptance through exploring inner parts Why every coping strategy has a purpose, often driven by protectors working to shield exiled parts that carry pain How recognizing and building relationships with internal parts can lead to profound healing and growth How IFS allows respectful trauma exploration at one’s own pace Why neurodivergent individuals may especially benefit from IFS’s flexible, creative, and affirming approach Ideas for how parents and therapists can help their children understand and connect with their parts   Resources: Jude’s website, Anchored in Self Queering IFS Podcast Inneractive Cards Books for kids, teens, and adults about IFS No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma & Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model by Richard Schwart, PhD Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Mindfulness and parenting coach Hunter Clarke-Fields (Mindful Mama Mentor) talks about her new book "Raising Good Humans" and the ways mindfulness can allow parents to respond to challenges with more grace and peace. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Creating a home environment that supports meaningful play can feel like a constant puzzle, from managing toy overload to setting up spaces that actually encourage focus, creativity, and independence. So today I’m sharing a conversation with Myriam Sandler, the creator of the hugely popular Mothercould platform and the author of the new book Playful by Design: A Stress-Free Guide to Raising Confident, Creative Kids through Independent Play. As a mother of three, Myriam shares engaging, easy-to-follow video tutorials that offer accessible DIY play ideas, parenting hacks, family travel tips, and more on her wildly popular Instagram and TikTok. Though I’m no longer dealing with toys lying around the house and cluttering our communal spaces, I definitely found life with my child’s toys challenging, from how to organize them and store them, to how to avoid having too many toys that never got used. I really could have used Myriam’s insights way back then. But if you’re still very much in it and sharing a home and life with things like toys, art supplies, and more, have a listen to this episode. Myriam and I discussed the power of independent play and why less is more when it comes to toys, how boredom can actually be a gift, and how small tweaks, like decluttering a play space or setting up “play hotspots,” can make a big difference in your child’s ability to play solo. Myriam really believes in making the space you have, the toys you have, and the system you implement work for you instead of trying to make someone else’s system work for your family. I hope you walk away feeling empowered knowing that you don’t need a ton of new things but just some time to evaluate what’s working and what’s not.   About my guest Myriam Sandler is the creator of Mothercould (@mothercould), a beloved kids’ activity and family lifestyle community trusted by millions of families. As a mother of three, Myriam shares engaging, easy-to-follow video tutorials that offer accessible DIY play ideas, parenting hacks, family travel tips, and more. Mothercould has grown to offer family-friendly, problem-solving products now available at major retailers.   You'll learn: Why boredom is an important aspect of sparking creativity and self-directed play How fewer toys can lead to deeper, more meaningful play The way that decluttering creates space for imagination to flourish What the key ingredients to independent play are, and what means and looks like The importance of boundaries and consistency in supporting sustained solo play How play “hotspots” and sensory activities can foster connection and emotional release  Resources: Mothercould Playful by Design: A Stress-Free Guide to Raising Confident, Creative Kids through Independent Play by Myriam Sandler Mothercould on Instagram Mothercould on Facebook Playful By Design website Mothercould on TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this reverse interview, Debbie Steinberg-Kuntz of Bright & Quirky talks to Debbie about how to forge a path when school isn't working out. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Parent coach Zach Morris joins Debbie to answer a listener question on how to support a neurodivergent child who has incredibly low self-esteem despite a parent's constant reassurance. Visit the show notes page at https://tiltparenting.com/session444 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today, we’re talking about awe and wonder and all the incredible benefits that these simple and accessible emotions can have in terms of learning and child development. And I have the perfect guest here to talk about it — Deborah Farmer Kris, a child development expert, longtime educator, and author of the wonderful new book Raising Awe-Seekers: How the Science of Wonder Helps Our Kids Thrive. In this conversation, we talk about how and why awe is such a powerful tool for emotional regulation, learning, and resilience for our kids. Deborah shares some of the neuroscience behind wonder and walks us through how simple moments of awe, like listening to music, walking outside, or witnessing a small act of kindness, can lower stress, spark curiosity, and build deeper connections for our kids. She also offered strategies for cultivating awe with your child, even during the most challenging seasons of parenting. This episode is a beautiful reminder that we don’t have to add one more thing to our to-do lists to make a meaningful shift. Sometimes, it’s about slowing down, noticing what’s already here, and inviting our kids into that sense of wonder with us. And I think what I love about this so much is that awe is something that’s available to all of us, and experiencing it, even for little moments, not only feels wonderful (pun intended), but it has very real, positive benefits. About Deborah Deborah Farmer Kris is a child development expert and the author of "Raising Awe-Seekers: How the Science of Wonder Helps Our Kids Thrive,” the I See You board book series, and the All the Time picture book series. Her bylines include CNN, PBS KIDS, NPR’s Mindshift, The Washington Post, the Boston Globe Magazine, and Oprah Daily. Deborah is currently an expert advisor for the PBS KIDS show, “Carl the Collector,” and spent 20+ years as a K-12 educator. Mostly, she loves sharing nuggets of practical wisdom that can make the parenting journey a little easier.   You'll learn: How the powerful emotion of awe builds resilience and supports well-being Why curiosity and wonder spark internal motivation and deeper learning How to tap into nature, art, music, and kindness as everyday sources of awe for children Why experiencing awe can lower stress, improve memory, and support emotional regulation How parents can nurture awe by modeling curiosity and slowing down with their kids Ideas for creating small, shared moments of wonder strengthen connection and support family wellness  Resources: Deborah Farmer Kris’ website Parenthood 365 Raising Awe-Seekers: How the Science of Wonder Helps Our Kids Thrive by Deborah Farmer Kris Raising Awe-Seekers Podcast Deborah on Instagram Deborah on LinkedIn You Wonder All the Time by Deborah Farmer Kris You Are Growing All the Time by Deborah Farmer Kris I Love You All the Time by Deborah Farmer Kirs You Have Feelings All the Time by Deborah Farmer Kris Dr. Dacher Kelter Dr. Michele Borba Mindshift (KQED / PBS) Pub Choir Robert Waldinger Hope for Cynics: The Surprising Science of Human Goodness by Jamil Zaki The Happiness Study at Harvard Challenge Success I Love N.Y.E. (Badly Drawn Boy song) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Educator, homeschooling mom, and founder of Lemon Lime Adventures Dayna Abraham discusses sensory processing challenges, being a differently wired parent, and her four-step approach parents can use to go from chaos to calm. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today I’m talking with Jacqui Byrne, the founder of FlexSchool, a pioneering educational model designed specifically for 2e students. Jacqui is an award-winning educational leader, a sought-after speaker, and a passionate advocate for neurodiverse learners. She’s also a parent of 2e kids herself, and she built FlexSchool not just as an educator, but as a mom determined to find a better way for her own children, who were struggling at school. This is Jacqui’s second time on the show—the last time was six years ago (and I encourage you to listen to that episode too). I wanted to bring Jacqui back to talk about what she’s learned and observed in supporting the learning and growth of twice-exceptional kids over the years. We get into all kinds of topics in this conversation, including the story behind FlexSchool’s creation and the philosophy that drives it, the power of talent-based learning, and how teachers and schools can become places of trust, safety, and joy for 2e kids who have often felt like misfits. Jacqui also shares insights into how behavioral issues in 2e students are often identity crises, and what it means to support their growth across the full arc of their lives.   About Jaqui Byrne Jacqui Byrne has a knack for seeing the brilliance others miss. As the visionary behind FlexSchool, she built a place where gifted and twice-exceptional (2e) students could thrive—quirks, challenges, and all. She didn’t set out to start a school; she set out to solve a problem. Too many gifted, complex learners were being overlooked, underestimated, or misunderstood, and that wasn’t something she was willing to accept.Jacqui never asks, “Why can’t they do this?” Instead, she asks, “What haven’t we figured out yet?” An award-winning educational leader, sought-after speaker, and passionate advocate, Jacqui presents at conferences, school districts, and education associations across the U.S. and internationally. She is the 2025 winner of the New Jersey Association for Gifted Children’s prestigious Developing Minds Award. She serves on the advisory board for the Bridges Graduate School of Cognitive Diversity in Education and holds a degree from Yale University. She is the parent of twice-exceptional kids and knows firsthand what it feels like to watch a child struggle in either a gifted program or special education when they need both. That’s why she built FlexSchool—not just as an educator, but as a mom who refused to give up.   You'll learn: How neurodivergent language is gaining acceptance and shifting education toward more inclusive, affirming mindsets How Flex School’s talent-based model meets students where they are, sparking agency, creativity, and joy What Jacqui sees as key to teaching 2e students—modeling humility, building trust, and embracing their humor and uniqueness Why identity crises and masking are common in 2e kids and often drive anxiety and behavior challenges Why gifted kids may struggle with executive function or study skills despite high intellect—and how to better support them  Resources: Flex School Inside the Flex School with Founder Jacqui Byrne (Tilt Parenting Podcast) 2e101 website New Jersey Association of Gifted Children (NJAGC) Dr. Ross Greene / Lives in the Balance Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speech-language pathologist and audiologist Dr. Donna Geffner explains what central auditory processing disorders are and discusses approaches to best supports and accommodations. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices