Be a Happier Parent

You can find additional resources from Tim here: https://resilienceshield.com/ Please follow me on Instagram and TikTok @beahappierparent Full videos of the episodes available on YouTube @alexindadland Keywords resilience, parenting, adversity, children, self-leadership, technology, community, struggle, mental health, emotional intelligence Summary In this conversation, Tim Curtis shares his insights on resilience, particularly in children, drawing from his experiences in the SAS and his work in teaching resilience. He emphasizes the importance of adversity in building resilience, the role of struggle in achieving happiness, and the need for children to engage in free play and face risks to develop agency and problem-solving skills. Curtis also discusses the impact of technology on children's mental health and the importance of trust and communication in parenting. Takeaways Resilience is built through adversity and stress. Children need to experience some stress to develop resilience. Allowing children to sit in their emotions is crucial for self-awareness. Struggle is essential for true happiness and growth. Boredom can lead to creativity and self-leadership in children. Community and free play are vital for children's development. Technology can impair resilience if not monitored properly. Trusting children to navigate risks fosters independence. Parents should model vulnerability and risk-taking for their children. Building a supportive community can enhance parenting and child development. Titles Building Resilient Kids: Insights from an SAS Veteran The Importance of Adversity in Child Development Sound bites "Resilience needs stress to be built." "With risk comes opportunity." "You can't just strip out the risk." Chapters 00:00 From Soldier to Advocate for Children 06:29 The Link Between Resilience and Morality 06:42 Understanding Resilience: Definitions and Components 11:28 Resilience: A Dynamic and Modifiable Concept 16:07 The Necessity of Adversity in Building Resilience 20:24 Happiness Through Struggle vs. Comfort 24:27 Harnessing Synthetic Happiness for Better Outcomes 25:03 Navigating Happiness: Synthetic vs. Enduring Joy 26:05 The Importance of Boredom and Self-Leadership 28:40 Challenging Negativity Bias in Parenting 29:53 The Role of Free Play in Child Development 34:23 Understanding Screen Time and Its Impact 42:50 Lessons from Parenting: Embracing Individuality 46:20 Finding Alternatives to Team Sports 47:56 The Power of Communal Parenting 51:42 Risk, Opportunity, and Resilience in Parenting

You can find the New Normal Charity @tnncharity on Instagram. Website: https://www.thenewnormalcharity.org/ Ben also coaches men on developing empathy and changing the way they think, behave and react both in work and life. You can find him on Instagram @ldn_brbr or email ben@thenewnormalcharity.org Please follow me on Instagram or TikTok @beahappierparent. Full videos of the episodes are available on YouTube @alexindadland Keywords grief, trauma, identity, loss, support, relationships, parenthood, mental health, healing, self-discovery Summary In this conversation, Alex Trippier and Ben discuss the complexities of grief, trauma, and identity. They explore how personal experiences shape our understanding of loss and the importance of shared experiences in healing. Ben shares his journey through grief after losing his father and how it impacted his relationships and behavior. They also touch on the gendered responses to grief and the societal expectations placed on men. The discussion emphasizes the need for open communication and support in navigating grief and the ongoing journey of self-discovery and change. Takeaways Grief is a unique experience for everyone. Time does not erase the pain of loss. Shared experiences can foster connection and understanding. Men often struggle to express their emotions. Parenthood can change one's perspective on grief. Trauma can shape our identities and behaviors. It's important to seek support during difficult times. Understanding different types of loss is crucial. Communication is key in relationships affected by grief. Self-discovery is an ongoing journey influenced by our past. Titles Navigating the Complexities of Grief The Impact of Trauma on Identity Sound bites "I just want to feel normal again." "Grief is a confusing thing." "Men don't speak about things." Chapters 00:00 Understanding Grief and the New Normal 37:30 The Scotch Egg Theory of Grief 46:12 The Complexity of Loss and Relationships 49:11 Gender Differences in Grief Responses 51:01 The Journey of Self-Discovery in Fatherhood 56:35 Understanding Addiction and Masculinity 01:01:19 Parenting and Personal Growth

Check out Marte’s full thesis here: https://ora.ox.ac.uk/objects/uuid:800e3289-08ad-449f-a00d-f5da87f1100d You help make some similar changes to our parental leave system by getting involved with The Dad Shift www.dadshift.org.uk Please follow me on Instagram and TikTok @beahappierparent   Keywords gender equality, Norway, parental leave, daddy quota, family dynamics, cultural values, work-life balance, childcare, feminism, societal norms Summary In this conversation, Marte discusses the cultural and governmental factors that have shaped gender equality in Norway, particularly in relation to parental leave policies and the daddy quota. The discussion explores the evolving roles of fathers in childcare, the dynamics of resentment in relationships, and the long-term impacts of these policies on family life. Marte emphasizes the importance of shared responsibilities and the need for societal change to foster a more egalitarian approach to parenting and work-life balance. Takeaways Gender equality is deeply embedded in Norwegian culture. Government policies have played a crucial role in promoting gender equality. The daddy quota encourages fathers to take an active role in childcare. Cultural values in Norway prioritize family time and work-life balance. Mothers often retain the managerial role in family dynamics. Resentment can arise from unequal distribution of parenting responsibilities. Parental leave policies impact long-term family relationships. Fathers in Norway are seen as experts in childcare due to their involvement. The corporate culture in Norway supports flexible working hours for both parents. Societal norms need to evolve to support shared parenting responsibilities. Titles Exploring Gender Equality in Norway The Impact of the Daddy Quota Sound bites "It's in our national DNA." "We value family time." "It's use it or lose it." Chapters 00:00 Cultural Foundations of Parenthood 04:03 The Daddy Quota: A Game Changer 06:55 Work-Life Balance in Norway vs. the UK 08:37 The Impact of Gender Roles on Parenting 11:06 Men's Perspectives on Parenting and Work 13:35 Long-Term Effects of Parental Leave Policies 16:09 The Importance of Shared Responsibilities 19:03 Conclusions and Future Directions 31:42 Work-Life Balance in Norway vs. the UK 34:45 Resentment in Parenting Roles 36:51 Judgment and Gender Expectations 40:53 Redefining Parenting Roles 45:56 The Manager vs. Expert Dynamic 49:57 Cultural Shifts in Parenting 52:43 The System of Gendered Parenting

Join author and journalist Jancee Dunn as she dives into the rollercoaster of marriage and parenthood. She shares hilarious yet poignant insights on the struggles of communication and the unexpected stressors of new parenthood. Dunn emphasizes the importance of establishing clear roles and responsibilities, as well as seeking couples therapy to navigate conflicts. Explore how societal expectations impact intimacy and the necessity of date nights to reconnect with your partner, ensuring love thrives amidst parenting chaos.

You can find Rachel on https://rachel-kelly.net/ Follow me on Instagram @beahappierparent Summary In this conversation, Rachel Kelly discusses the complexities of parenting teenagers, emphasizing the importance of self-relationship, connection, and understanding. She explores how parents can navigate their own needs while fostering autonomy in their children, the illusion of control, and the impact of societal expectations on parenting. The dialogue highlights the significance of compassion, judgment, and the evolving nature of parent-child relationships as children grow into adulthood. Takeaways Your main relationship is with yourself. Connecting with teenagers requires understanding and compassion. Parents must navigate their own needs while supporting their children. The illusion of control can hinder relationships with teenagers. Managing expectations and anxiety is crucial in parenting. Embracing differences and individuality fosters connection. Judgment can be detrimental; compassion is key. The parent-child relationship evolves as children grow. Supporting children means assisting, not rescuing them. Parenting becomes more rewarding as children mature. Keywords parenting, teenagers, self-relationship, connection, control, anxiety, compassion, individuality, judgment, growth Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Personal Connections 04:20 Emotional Regulation and Connection 05:32 The Evolution of Parent-Teen Relationships 06:43 Letting Go of Control 09:30 The Shift in Parenting Dynamics 10:19 Practical Strategies for Better Communication 12:41 Expectations and Reality in Family Life 15:51 The Importance of Timing in Conversations 18:28 Nutrition and Well-being for Teenagers 24:53 Navigating Parenting Challenges 26:58 Understanding Anxiety in Parenting 29:29 The Gendered Anxiety Gap 33:43 Embracing Uncertainty in Parenting 37:54 Judgment and Compassion in Parenting 42:10 The Importance of Connection 45:06 Redefining Pride and Agency in Parenting 51:24 The Evolving Parent-Child Relationship Titles Navigating the Teenage Years: A Parent's Guide The Art of Connection: Parenting Teens Sound Bites "We want to connect, right?" "What else could be possible?" "You can learn and grow."      

    You can find Sam on Substack @goodanger and Instagram @samparkeruk You can find me on Instagram and TikTok @beahappierparent and full videos of these episodes are available on Youtube @alexindadland Summary This conversation delves into the complexities of anger, exploring its multifaceted nature, gender dynamics, and its role in relationships and parenting. The speakers discuss how societal norms shape our understanding of anger, the importance of expressing it in healthy ways, and the need for emotional awareness in both personal and professional contexts. They emphasize the significance of recognizing anger as a valid emotion that can lead to positive change when managed effectively. Takeaways Anger is a multifaceted emotion that can be both constructive and destructive. Gender plays a significant role in how anger is perceived and expressed. Healthy relationships require the ability to express anger and resolve conflicts. Modeling healthy conflict resolution for children is crucial in parenting. Anger in the workplace often goes unaddressed, leading to disengagement. Somatic awareness can help individuals identify and process their anger. Anger can serve as a signal for unmet needs and insecurities. Trial and error is essential in learning how to manage anger effectively. Understanding the body’s response to anger can enhance emotional intelligence. Embracing anger as a natural emotion can lead to personal growth and healthier relationships. Chapters 00:00 Understanding Anger: A Gendered Emotion 07:51 The Role of Anger in Parenting and Social Media 13:08 Rethinking Anger: Beyond Aggression and Violence 19:09 Anger as a Tool for Self-Discovery 24:00 Anger in Relationships: Navigating Conflict 30:11 Quiet Quitting: The Impact of Unexpressed Anger 36:11 The Complexity of Anger in Parenting 39:04 Modeling Healthy Conflict Resolution 42:02 Understanding Anger as a Primary Emotion 46:30 Anger: A Servant or a Master? 52:25 The Body's Role in Emotional Awareness 57:29 Integrating Body and Mind in Emotional Health Titles The Complexity of Anger: Understanding Its Role in Our Lives Gender Dynamics of Anger: Who Gets to Express It? Sound Bites "Anger is a multifaceted emotion." "Who gets to feel angry?" "Anger at work is often avoided."  

You can find all the support PANDAS offer here: https://pandasfoundation.org.uk/ Please follow me on Instagram and TikTok @beahappierparent In this conversation, Alex Trippier speaks with Sally from the Pandas Foundation about the complexities of parenting, mental health, and the challenges faced by parents, particularly those dealing with autism. They explore the emotional struggles of new parents, the realities of postnatal depression, and the importance of support systems. The discussion also touches on the unique experiences of fathers and the dynamics of family relationships, emphasizing the need for open communication and understanding in navigating these challenges. Chapters 00:00 New Chapter 02:57 The Impact of the Pandemic on Mental Health Services 03:51 Personal Journey: Sally's Experience with Motherhood 09:19 Navigating Relationships During Parenting Challenges 15:24 Seeking Help: The Importance of Support Services 20:16 Understanding Mental Health: Labels and Misconceptions 25:00 The Role of Communication in Relationships 25:58 New Rock bottom 26:32 Sleeping and anonymity 30:37 Modern Support: Technology and Accessibility in Mental Health 32:31 Building Relationships Through Support Services 33:31 Dads and Mental Health: Breaking the Stigma 36:27 Navigating Trauma and Anxiety in Parenthood 40:31 Understanding Autism: The Journey to Diagnosis 47:54 The Intersection of Autism and Parenting Challenges 56:03 Balancing Parenting Styles: Communication and Compromise Takeaways Parenting often differs greatly from expectations. Mental health struggles are common among parents. Postnatal depression is a serious issue that needs attention. Support systems are crucial for parents' well-being. Dads face unique mental health challenges during parenthood. Autism presents specific parenting dynamics and challenges. Open communication is key in relationships during parenting. It's important to validate feelings of struggle and anxiety. Navigating family expectations can be complex and stressful. Finding balance in parenting responsibilities is essential. Keywords parenting, mental health, postnatal depression, autism, family dynamics, support, fatherhood, motherhood, emotional well-being, parenting challenges Sound Bites "Sally has two children with autism." "How do we support each other as couples?" "Autism's such a wide spectrum."    

You can find Melissa on Instagram @melissa_hogenboom Full episodes available with video on Youtube @alexindadland Please follow me on Instagram or TikTok @beahappierparent Join Melissa Hogenboom and Alex Trippier as they delve into the intricate dynamics of power, status, and gender roles in modern society. This episode explores how these elements influence our personal and professional lives, with a particular focus on parenting and relationships. Key Topics: The intersection of power, status, and money Gender roles and expectations in parenting The impact of societal norms on personal choices Insights from Melissa's book on power dynamics Highlights: Melissa discusses the concept of "faux power" in the home and its implications. Alex shares personal anecdotes about balancing work and family life. The duo examines the evolving roles of mothers and fathers in today's world. Quotes: "Status is not a luxury, it's a basic human need." - Melissa Hogenboom "We need to make the invisible visible in our relationships." - Alex Trippier Call to Action: Don't miss this engaging conversation that challenges traditional views and offers fresh perspectives on achieving balance in life. Subscribe now to stay updated on future episodes! Hashtags: #PowerDynamics #Parenting #GenderRoles #Podcast

Rowan Whitehead, founder of the Bridging the Gap community, dives into the intricacies of gender equity in parenting. She discusses the exhausting burden of unpaid labor and emotional work that often falls on mothers. The conversation highlights the detrimental effects of 'weaponized incompetence' and the necessity for men to engage more actively in household responsibilities. Rowan also emphasizes the gaps in women's health research and the need for society to challenge patriarchal norms, aiming for true equality for all parents.

You can find all Amiee's work here: amieecarltoncoaching.com  Her instagram is: amieecarlton_coaching You can find full videos of all these episodes on my youtube channel @alexindadland. Please follow me on instagram and TikTok @beahappierparent Summary In this conversation, Alex Trippier and Amiee Carlton delve into the complexities of parenting, exploring themes such as the culture of blame, emotional communication, and the pressures parents face in striving for perfection. They discuss the importance of self-awareness, agency, and the need for a shift in perspective towards parenting, emphasizing that it is not about controlling children but understanding their needs and emotions. The dialogue also touches on the impact of socioeconomic factors and the evolution of parenting expectations in modern society, ultimately advocating for a more compassionate and understanding approach to raising children. Takeaways Parents can only change their own behavior, not their children's. The culture of blame in parenting leads to increased anxiety. Understanding the environment is crucial in addressing children's behavior. There is no absolute definition of good or bad parenting. Parenting is inherently challenging and requires patience. Agency in parenting means recognizing what we can control. Gentle parenting is often misunderstood and requires deeper understanding. Socioeconomic factors significantly influence parenting dynamics. Parenting expectations have evolved, leading to increased pressure on parents. Self-awareness is key to effective parenting and communication. Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Parenting Coaching 03:41 The Parent-Child Dynamic 05:09 Understanding Behavior and Environment 07:36 The Role of Ego in Parenting 10:02 Cultural Constructs of Good and Bad 13:07 Navigating Parenting Challenges 15:26 The Selfish Nature of Parenting 18:25 Socioeconomic Influences on Parenting 20:20 The Importance of Relationships 20:48 Understanding the Nervous System in Parenting 22:21 The Debate on Gentle Parenting 23:38 Defining Successful Parenting 24:30 The Challenge of Emotional Acceptance 26:40 The Exhaustion of Parenting Dynamics 28:11 Building Relationships Takes Time 29:56 Navigating Parenting in Public Spaces 31:50 The Impact of Past Parenting Styles 33:56 Connection Over Control in Parenting 36:32 Understanding Anxiety in Children 38:32 The Evolution of Parenting and Meaning 42:03 Parental Anxiety and Its Effects 44:18 Redefining Great Parenting 47:23 The Complexity of Parenting Dynamics 51:28 Building Effective Communication and Boundaries 55:47 Embracing Growth Through Failure 59:51 The Importance of Self-Work in Parenting Keywords parenting, communication, emotional intelligence, gentle parenting, parental anxiety, self-awareness, relationships, child development, parenting culture, agency Titles Navigating the Complexities of Parenting The Power of Self-Awareness in Parenting Sound Bites "We live in a culture of blame." "Why is this happening?" "It's hard because it's hard."