Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

How to Meet Your Needs for Connection: Attunement

Mar 8, 2021

01:10:09

Snipd AI

In this insightful conversation, psychologist Rick Hanson and mindfulness expert Forrest Hanson delve into the crucial role of attunement in forming genuine connections. They discuss the concept of 'micro attunements' and how small gestures can significantly enhance relationships. The hosts explore emotional availability, the dynamics of co-regulation in parenting, and the importance of active listening. They also emphasize the need to communicate our wants and needs while respecting our own emotional boundaries—all essential for nurturing meaningful interactions.

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Quick takeaways

Understanding the psychological technique of attunement can significantly enhance our connections with others in times of increased isolation.

Recognizing varying connection needs in different relationship contexts helps to cultivate more fulfilling and meaningful interpersonal interactions.

Emotional responsiveness, driven by attention, availability, and adaptability, is essential for creating satisfying and dynamic relationships with others.

Deep dives

The Importance of Connection

The discussion emphasizes the fundamental human need for connection, especially in a time when isolation is prevalent. Understanding that not all interactions fulfill this need is crucial, as many social exchanges can feel superficial or inadequate. Exploring deeper connections is portrayed as vital for genuine emotional fulfillment, highlighting the contrast between pleasant interactions and those that foster true relational satisfaction. The conversation sets the stage to delve into the elements necessary for establishing deeper relationships through effective interpersonal interactions.

Intro

2min

Navigating Emotional Connections

25min

The Art of Attunement in Relationships

9min

Understanding Attunement and Co-Regulation in Relationships

4min

The Dynamics of Co-Regulation in Parenting

9min

The Art of Responsiveness in Relationships

17min

Understanding Attunement: The Key to Emotional Connection

5min

During this time of increased isolation our needs for connection are harder to meet than ever. Today Rick and Forrest are exploring how we can use the psychological technique of "attunement" to connect better with others, and meet our own need for connection.

Life After COVID Summit: Join Dr. Rick Hanson, Forrest Hanson, and a roster of world-class experts during this FREE three-day online event to explore our life after COVID. Click here to learn more about the Summit and register now.

Key Topics:

2:15: Moments that satisfy our need for connection.

5:45: The “Still Face Experiment”

8:55: Attention, availability, responsiveness.

10:35: Which relationships fill you up?

13:50: What is attunement?

18:40: The “emotional risk” of attunement.

24:30: Paying attention.

31:20: Being open to being changed.

33:10: Do I matter to you?

37:30: Availability and co-regulation.

41:15: “Our interactions are systems.”

42:30: Rick pushes back a bit on co-regulation.

44:50: The impact of our nature on how we view interactions.

47:45: Becoming responsive.

52:40: Communicating wants and needs.

57:40: Respecting your own needs.

59:15: The impact of social power and privilege on our interactions.

1:04:30: Recap

Forrest has a new YouTube channel! Subscribe to the channel, and watch his newest video over there.

Sponsors:

From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.

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Connect with the show:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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