Modern Anarchy 71. Community Building: Masking, Polysecure, and Boundaries as an Act of Love with Jesse Holzman
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Aug 24, 2022 AI Snips
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Structure Enables Authentic Presence
- Jesse builds community to create predictable, safer, and bounded interaction patterns that fit their neurodivergent needs.
- They use organizer roles and structure to reduce social uncertainty and enable authentic connection.
Masking From Childhood Exhausted Their Energy
- Jesse recounts elementary school masking: policing body movement, avoiding stimming, and holding thoughts back to fit gendered and classroom norms.
- That constant filtering drained energy and diverted focus from learning.
Ask For Practical Support Proactively
- Ask for concrete supports and outsource tasks that deplete your energy, like reminders or check-ins.
- Tell people your communication style and delegate parts of emotional labour before expectations collapse.