How Mattering to Yourself & Others Can Change Your Life with Oprah, Jennifer Wallace & Ina Garten

Jan 27, 2026

Jennifer Wallace, journalist and founder of the Mattering Institute, shares findings from six years of research on why feeling valued is a core human need. Short conversations explore showing up, practical ways to signal care, the role of work and mentorship, and how mattering affects health, resilience, and community. Ina Garten joins with everyday gestures that make people feel seen.

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INSIGHT

Mattering As A Core Human Need

Mattering is a fundamental human need tied to being seen, heard, and valued.
Jennifer Wallace found a global erosion of mattering driving people toward counterfeit attention.

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ADVICE

Choose One Daily Need

Prioritize one personal need each morning so you can show up for others.
Jennifer Wallace uses a toothbrush-minute practice to choose that daily need.

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ADVICE

Give Undivided Attention And Commit

Give people your undivided attention and schedule the next meeting before parting.
Ina Garten says these small rituals communicate that someone is important to you.

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Why mattering matters and research origins

00:43 • 2min

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What counterfeit mattering looks like

03:03 • 2min

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Ina Garten on showing people they matter

05:06 • 4min

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Prioritizing presence and commitment

The thread that ties humanity together

13:33 • 2min

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Extrinsic vs intrinsic values and wellbeing

15:10 • 2min

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Mattering as hope and anti-mattering dangers

16:56 • 3min

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Mattering impacts health and longevity

20:01 • 2min

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Transitions, invitations, and the beautiful mess effect

21:41 • 3min

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Military spouses and silent scaffolding

24:13 • 7min

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Growing self-worth after neglect

31:42 • 6min

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From sanitation worker to Harvard: uplifting support staff

37:13 • 7min

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Talking to custodial staff changes lives

44:06 • 4min

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Mattering at work: SED ingredients

48:30 • 3min

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Mattering span and practical challenge

• Mentioned in 3 episodes

Mattering, The Secret to a Life of Deep Connection and Purpose

In 'The Wives', Simone Gorrindo shares her intimate story of becoming an army wife after her husband joins an elite Army unit. The memoir delves into her experiences of loneliness, friendship, and the complexities of military life, offering a hopeful perspective on human connection amidst adversity. It is both a love story and a coming-of-age tale, set against the backdrop of America's social divisions.

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• Mentioned in 6 episodes

Be Ready When the Luck Happens

A Memoir

Ina Garten

In 'Be Ready When the Luck Happens,' Ina Garten shares her life story, from a challenging childhood to her marriage with Jeffrey and her journey to becoming the Barefoot Contessa. The memoir details her transition from a job in the White House to owning a specialty food store in the Hamptons, and eventually becoming a bestselling cookbook author and celebrated television host. Garten's story is filled with advice on relationships, business partnerships, and pursuing one's dreams, emphasizing the importance of hard work, tenacity, and doing what you love.

Oprah is joined by award-winning journalist and New York Times bestselling author Jennifer Wallace to talk about her transformative new book "Mattering: The Secret to a Life of Deep Connection and Purpose." Drawing on six years of research, Wallace shares how mattering - the feeling that we are valued and have an opportunity to add value - is a fundamental human need essential to our well-being. She believes there's been "an erosion of mattering" and provides actionable steps to deepen your connections, reconnect to your sense of purpose and navigate challenges with greater resilience. Joining the conversation is Jennifer's close friend and lifestyle icon Ina Garten. Oprah and Jennifer also speak with a military wife who learned how to bring mattering back to her marriage and an extraordinary young man who went from being a sanitation worker to a Harvard Law School graduate.

BUY THE BOOK!

'Mattering: The Secret to a Life of Deep Connection and Purpose' by Jennifer Wallace: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/756179/mattering-by-jennifer-breheny-wallace/

Chapters:

00:00:00 - Welcome Jennifer Wallace, author of “Mattering”

00:05:50 - Ina Garten joins

00:07:05 - The importance of mattering to yourself

00:08:40 - How Ina shows people they matter

00:09:30 - The importance of showing up

00:10:50 - One easy way to show people they matter

00:12:20 - The thread that ties us together

00:13:40 - Extrinsic and intrinsic values

00:15:50 - Professor Gordon Flett on why mattering is life or death