Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson Ep. 38: How to Keep Your Eyes On the Prize
Oct 2, 2018
Dr. Rick Hanson, a renowned psychologist and author focused on resilience, shares insights on the concept of "unilateral virtue"—a method to improve personal relationships by concentrating on one's own behavior instead of others' faults. He discusses reframing personal wellbeing as a self-interested strategy and the importance of clear agreements in building trust. Rick offers practical advice on establishing personal codes, managing irritation, and recognizing unhealthy patterns in relationships, all while emphasizing the power of choosing virtuous responses.
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Clean Up Your Side Of The Street
- Unilateral virtue means cleaning up your side of the street rather than waiting for others to change first.
- Acting this way is often the strongest, most self-interested move to take care of yourself and relationships.
Set A Timeframe And Reserve Rights
- Practice unilateral virtue for a reasonable timeframe and then reassess whether the other person changes.</n- If they consistently don't, reserve your rights and scale or exit the relationship appropriately.
Flag Broken Agreements Early
- Flag broken agreements early and politely reboot the understanding to prevent bad behavior becoming normal.
- Study whether the violation was one-off, unclear expectation, or a pattern before escalating.
