Why We Can’t Sleep & How to Fix It with Dr. Shelby Harris
Jul 9, 2024
01:11:22
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Dr. Shelby Harris, a psychologist and sleep expert, shares advice on sleep wellness for women, handling snoring partners, and improving sleep quality. The podcast dives into the importance of realistic sleep goals, managing menopausal symptoms, and navigating bedtime routines. They also touch on the impact of societal pressures on women's sleep and the importance of addressing individual sleep needs.
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Quick takeaways
Establishing a meditation routine can help women manage sleep anxiety and mental load.
Avoid using sleep tracking devices for insomnia as they can increase stress.
Consistent sleep hygiene and mindfulness practices are key for managing insomnia.
Creating a sleep alliance with partners can improve intimacy and relationship satisfaction.
Deep dives
Implications of Gender on Sleep Issues
Women tend to face more challenges with sleep than men due to a variety of factors, including hormonal changes, life stages like menopause and pregnancy, and increased social and psychological stress. Research is beginning to focus more on sleep issues specific to women, exploring areas such as mindfulness-based approaches and hormone-related studies to address and understand these challenges better.
Meditation as a Tool for Sleep Improvement
Meditation is highlighted as a valuable tool to address sleep anxiety and busy brain patterns, especially impactful for women dealing with the burden of mental load. Establishing a meditation routine during the day can help individuals better manage their thoughts and worries, potentially improving their ability to relax and transition into a restful state at night.
Avoidance of Tracking Devices for Insomnia Management
Although sleep tracking devices can be beneficial for curiosity or general sleep monitoring, they are not recommended for individuals dealing with insomnia. The focus on data from these devices can heighten stress and anxiety about sleep quality, potentially worsening sleep issues. Instead, maintaining a basic paper sleep diary and developing healthy sleep habits without additional stressors is encouraged.
Importance of Sleep Hygiene and Behavioral Changes
Emphasizing the significance of sleep hygiene and behavioral adjustments for improved sleep, such as maintaining consistent sleep-wake times and limiting time spent in bed, is crucial for effective insomnia management. Engaging in mindfulness practices during the day, establishing prioritized to-do lists, and reducing factors like caffeine intake near bedtime are recommended strategies for addressing sleep challenges.
Exploring Couples Sleep Dynamics and Sleep Divorce
Research into couples sleep dynamics, including considerations of when partners should sleep together or separately to enhance the quality of their rest and relationship, is gaining attention. The concept of a 'sleep divorce,' where partners opt to sleep apart to improve individual sleep experiences, is being explored as a potential solution for couples struggling with different sleep needs or disturbances.
The Importance of Sleep in Relationships and Health
Prioritizing sleep in a relationship can lead to improved intimacy and overall well-being. Creating a sleep alliance where partners have separate sleep environments but maintain intimacy before sleep has shown to improve closeness and reduce resentment in the relationship. Research suggests that valuing each other's health by allowing for individual sleep needs can strengthen the relationship.
Understanding Sleep Needs and Seeking Help
Individuals have unique sleep needs similar to shoe sizes, ranging from five to eleven hours. Personalized sleep tracking and experimentation with bedtime routines help determine optimal sleep duration. Recognizing signs of insufficient sleep such as prolonged sleep on weekends or difficulty falling asleep can indicate the need for evaluation by a sleep specialist. It's crucial to advocate for oneself and seek medical attention if experiencing consistent sleep issues, as various treatments are available to address sleep disorders.
326. Why We Can’t Sleep & How to Fix It with Dr. Shelby Harris
Psychologist and sleep expert, Dr. Shelby Harris, takes us on a deep dive into our most important pillar of health: SLEEP. From insomnia to night anxiety to revenge procrastination to snoring partners, Dr. Shelby Harris has realistic, concrete advice to help us understand why we struggle – and how to get the sleep we need.
How much sleep should we really get – and the signs we’re not getting enough.
Realistic sleep wellness for women – and how to share the mental load that’s keeping us up.
How to handle snoring – and how to create a sleep alliance with our partners – (this part changed Abby and Glennon’s sleep plan forever!)
Plus, Abby’s hot tip for fixing your social media algorithm. (Spoiler alert: Highland mini cows.)
About Dr. Harris:
Dr. Shelby Harris is a psychologist and sleep specialist who treats a wide variety of sleep, anxiety, and depression issues. In addition to her book The Women’s Guide to Overcoming Insomnia, Dr. Harris has been a columnist for the New York Times, and has been featured in other media including the New Yorker, Washington Post, Today Show, and Good Morning America. Dr. Harris can be found on Instagram at @SleepDocShelby where she provides evidence-based information about sleep wellness and sleep disorders.
