The Francesca Psychology Podcast Childhood Neglect & Feeling Like You Can Never Belong - Anna Runkle
9 snips
Oct 13, 2025 
Anna Runkle, the Crappy Childhood Fairy, helps people heal from childhood trauma. She discusses how childhood neglect impacts our ability to connect and the signs of being ostracized in youth. Anna breaks down self-isolation and offers strategies to combat it, emphasizing the importance of cultivating 'connectability.' She also explains limerence and trauma bonds, guiding listeners on how to recognize healthy relationships. With practical tips for finding your community, Anna empowers others to embrace their true selves and foster deeper connections.
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Trauma Often Shows As Disconnection
- Childhood trauma commonly leaves people feeling disconnected from others and creates a persistent 'wall' between them and social life.
- Anna Runkle calls this core symptom of trauma and highlights covert avoidance as a hidden form of disconnection.
Practice Connectability Skills
- Learn 'connectability' skills to build an easy ability to connect, detect safety, and be perceived as graceful and easygoing.
- Practice social skills, boundary-setting, and regulating dysregulation to become more connectable at any age.
Become The Welcomer First
- When joining groups, focus outward: look for someone who seems isolated and welcome them to feel included.
- Practice polite behaviours (eye contact, smiling, simple small talk) to put others at ease and reduce your anxiety.
