Good Life Project How to Quiet Your Inner Critic & Escape Perfectionism | Dr. Ellen Hendriksen
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Dec 22, 2025 
Dr. Ellen Hendriksen, a clinical psychologist and author focused on anxiety and perfectionism, dives deep into the pitfalls of perfectionism. She unpacks the difference between healthy striving and destructive self-criticism, shedding light on how perfectionism affects mental and physical health. Ellen offers practical strategies for silencing the inner critic, stresses the importance of living by core values, and encourages embracing imperfection in both work and relationships. Her insights help redefine success and foster self-compassion.
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Two Pillars That Make Perfectionism Toxic
- Perfectionism has a healthy side: conscientiousness fuels excellence and responsibility.
- It becomes harmful when paired with harsh self-criticism and over-evaluating performance as worth.
Destroying Work When It Feels 'Not Good Enough'
- Jonathan describes destroying paintings that didn't match his internal standard despite long effort.
- Ellen says the problem wasn't high standards but conflating the work with personal worth.
Perfectionism Hides Behind Success
- Many clients don't label themselves perfectionists but feel like failures despite external success.
- Perfectionism is really about never feeling good enough, making prevalence likely underestimated.