Trust is given, not built; focus on the giver's power in the dynamic.
Embrace doubt for reflection and growth, viewing it as a positive force.
Address defensive behaviors early to prevent trust erosion; timely conversations are crucial.
Establish human connection first when building trust with an audience; adapt and move together.
Deep dives
Understanding Trust as a Power Dynamic
Trust is not something to be built but given, recognizing the power the giver holds in the trust dynamic. The concept of 'building trust' is deemed problematic as it assumes control over trust. In any interaction, the giver holds the trust, and the leader must earn it.
Reframing Doubt as a Positive Force
Doubt is discussed as a misunderstood emotion often labeled as negative. The speaker emphasizes that doubt can lead to deep reflection and growth, as it signifies a place of longing. Rather than discouraging self-doubt, embracing it is presented as a means to progress.
Navigating Trust Wobbles in Relationships
A three-stage framework is introduced for understanding trust shifts: defensiveness, disengagement, and disenchantment. Leaders are encouraged to address defensive behaviors early on to prevent further trust erosion. Timely conversations, avoiding justifications, and recognizing intent are highlighted as key strategies.
Restoring Trust through Honest Dialogue
In situations where trust has been damaged, individuals are advised to seek permission to express their perspective. Acknowledging one's power in giving trust away and the need for the other party to earn it back is emphasized. Trust is seen as a reciprocal exchange that requires open communication and a willingness to engage in self-reflection.
Establishing Connection for Trust Building
Building trust with an audience or any group involves creating human connection first. The speaker suggests focusing on settling into calmness and demonstrating presence rather than emphasizing achievements. Simple gestures like dressing to match the environment can subtly convey connection and establish rapport with the audience.
Navigating the Journey of Growth through Beginner's Mindset
Embracing a beginner's mindset is advocated for personal growth and resilience. Exploring new hobbies, learning unfamiliar skills, and immersing oneself in diverse experiences are highlighted as ways to overcome mental rigidity and cultivate curiosity. The process of constantly seeking new challenges and rethinking established beliefs is seen as essential for ongoing self-improvement.
Key Point 1: Importance of Connection and Authenticity in Presentations
Establishing a genuine connection with the audience during the initial moments of a presentation is crucial. Rather than laying out a predefined path, the speaker highlights the importance of embarking on a journey with the audience, adapting and moving together. The speaker emphasizes warmth, integrity, and the ability to create momentum as essential behaviors for both personal growth and engaging presentations.
Key Point 2: Overcoming Struggles and Building Self-Kindness
Overcoming personal struggles, such as self-acceptance and mental health challenges, involves being kind to oneself and seeking support, like counseling, to navigate through difficult times. By sharing personal experiences and embracing vulnerability, individuals can find strength and growth. Encouraging empathy towards others and offering genuine support can create a positive impact on mental well-being and personal development.
Rachel Botsman is a trust expert, author and academic at Oxford University. Her books ‘What’s Mine is Yours’ and ‘Who Can You Trust?’ are critically acclaimed. Rachel was named one of the world’s 30 most Influential Management Thinkers by Thinkers50. She is also the host of the podcast Rethink Moments.
In this episode, Rachel shares with us how to successfully speak in public: letting go of the need to be liked and focus on the giving. She provides her expertise on trust and the thoughts behind her crucial theory: “Trust is a confident relationship with the unknown”.
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This month on the High Performance Circle - The brilliant Oli Patrick joined us on The High Performance Tour 2022 and gave a great Keynote on the three things you can do to improve your wellbeing and operate at the top of your game. Plus, ultra runner Simon Dent explains the performance benefits and common lessons shared between business and exercise. Sign up now to watch: www.thehighperformancepodcast.co.uk
Also, check out our new weekly addition The Monday Motivation Newsletter. The purpose of Monday Motivation is to connect more regularly with you! We want to give Circle members a bit of inspiration, motivation and purpose at the beginning of each week. Whether that is a few key things to consider when facing the upcoming week, reading recommendations or ideas to think about when listening to the weekly podcast episode. Sign up now. Just go to www.thehighperformancepodcast.co.uk
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