Boundless Life Gretchen Rubin Interview On How To Declutter Your Home & Your Life For Outer Order, Inner Calm & Happiness.
Mar 30, 2019
In this conversation with Gretchen Rubin, a bestselling author known for her insights on happiness and habits, listeners discover how decluttering can enhance well-being. She emphasizes that outer order leads to inner calm and provides tailored strategies for managing personal space. Emotional connections to belongings are explored, alongside tips for mindful shopping to prevent clutter. Rubin encourages engaging family in the decluttering process and discusses the possibility of seeking help, making organization accessible for everyone.
01:00:29
Outer Order, Inner Calm
- Outer order significantly contributes to inner calm, even energizing people to tackle bigger projects.
- Getting control of possessions brings a sense of control over life, empowering one to face challenges.
Decluttering Strategy
- Begin decluttering by discarding items, not organizing.
- Getting rid of unnecessary items simplifies organization, eliminating the need for complex systems.
Keep or Discard
- Ask if items energize you, or if you need, use, or love them.
- Keep items that spark joy, are useful, or hold sentimental value, discarding the rest.
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Intro
00:00 • 2min
Innovative Home Wellness Solutions
01:59 • 5min
The Power of Decluttering
07:27 • 4min
Mastering the Art of Decluttering
11:27 • 18min
Mindful Shopping and Decluttering Strategies
29:41 • 24min
Outsourcing Your Declutter Journey
53:33 • 7min
Mindful Home Arrangement for Inner Calm and Happiness
01:00:53 • 3min
Outer Order, Inner Calm
Gretchen Rubin
In 'Outer Order, Inner Calm', Gretchen Rubin argues that an organized space significantly contributes to inner calm and overall happiness. The book offers over a hundred practical strategies for decluttering and organizing, divided into sections such as 'Make Choices', 'Create Order', 'Know Yourself–and Others', 'Cultivate Helpful Habits', and 'Add Beauty'. Rubin emphasizes the importance of understanding personal habits and emotional attachments to possessions, and provides manageable steps to create a serene and orderly environment. By getting rid of unnecessary items, readers can free their minds and shelves for what they truly value, leading to a more controlled, calm, and energetic life.
12 Rules for Life
An Antidote to Chaos
Jordan B Peterson
In this book, Jordan B. Peterson offers twelve profound and practical rules for living a meaningful life. He argues that happiness is a fleeting and unpredictable goal, and instead, people should seek meaning as a defense against the suffering inherent in life. The book is divided into chapters, each representing one of the twelve rules, such as 'Stand up straight with your shoulders back,' 'Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping,' and 'Pursue what is meaningful (not what is expedient).' Peterson draws on examples from his clinical practice, personal life, cutting-edge psychology, philosophy, and ancient myths to provide a guide for personal improvement and coping with adversity.
Why we buy
The Science of Shopping
Graham Strong
Kate Broome
James Erskine
In 'Why We Buy: The Science of Shopping', Paco Underhill explores the psychology and anthropology of consumer behavior, providing insights into how retailers can optimize their stores to increase sales and customer satisfaction. The book delves into the intricacies of shopping habits and how they are influenced by various factors such as store layout, product placement, and customer demographics.
The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up
Marie Kondo
In this book, Marie Kondo introduces her revolutionary KonMari Method for tidying and organizing. Unlike traditional methods that focus on cleaning room by room or a little at a time, Kondo's approach involves categorizing items (clothes, books, papers, miscellaneous items, and sentimental items) and discarding those that do not spark joy. The method promises lasting results by changing the way one thinks about and interacts with their possessions. Kondo emphasizes the importance of handling each item, thanking items for their service, and finding a designated home for each item to maintain a tidy and organized space. The book also delves into the psychological and lifestyle benefits of tidying, suggesting that it can lead to greater clarity, confidence, and a more intentional way of living[1][3][5].
Better Than Before
Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives
Gretchen Rubin
In 'Better Than Before', Gretchen Rubin explores the science and practice of habit formation. She identifies 21 strategies for making and breaking habits, emphasizing the importance of self-knowledge and tailoring habits to individual personalities. Rubin categorizes people into four tendencies—Upholders, Questioners, Obligers, and Rebels—and explains how these tendencies influence habit formation. The book is filled with practical advice, personal anecdotes, and rigorous research, making it a comprehensive and engaging guide to building happier, stronger, and more productive lives.
The Happiness Project
Gretchen Rubin
In 'The Happiness Project', Gretchen Rubin chronicles her year-long journey to enhance her happiness. Despite having a fulfilling life, Rubin realized she wasn’t focusing enough on her own happiness. She divided her project into twelve months, each with a different area of focus and specific goals. From boosting energy and improving her marriage to enhancing her work life and leisure activities, Rubin tested various strategies, including those from Epicurus, Thoreau, and modern scientists. The book combines historical wisdom, scientific research, and personal anecdotes to provide practical advice on how to make life happier and more fulfilling.
Happier at Home
Gretchen Rubin
In 'Happier at Home', Gretchen Rubin builds on the lessons from her previous book, 'The Happiness Project', by undertaking a new project to make her home a happier place. Starting in September and continuing through May, Rubin dedicates each month to a different theme, such as possessions, marriage, time, and parenthood. She experiments with concrete, manageable resolutions to boost her happiness and that of her family. The book combines memoir, science, philosophy, and experimentation, offering practical tips and insights to help readers find more happiness in their own lives[1][3][5].
Outer order contributes to inner calm.
And for most of us, a rigid, one-size-fits-all solution doesn't work.
The fact is, when we tailor our approach to suit our own particular challenges and habits, we're then able to create the order that will make our lives happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative.
My guest on today's show - Gretchen Rubin - has found that getting control of our stuff makes us feel more in control of our lives.
By getting rid of things we don't use, don't need, or don't love, we free our minds (and our shelves) for what we truly value. With a sense of fun, and a clear idea of what's realistic for most people, Gretchen suggests dozens of manageable steps for creating a more serene, orderly environment—one that helps us to create the lives we want.
Gretchen is the author of several books, including the blockbuster New York Times bestsellers: Better Than Before: A Day by Day Journal The Happiness Project Happier at Home
And most recently: Outer Order, Inner Calm: Declutter and Organize to Make More Room for Happiness.
She has an enormous readership, both in print and online, and her books have sold more than three million copies worldwide, in more than thirty languages.
She makes frequent TV appearances and is in much demand as a speaker. On her weekly podcast, Happier with Gretchen Rubin, she discusses good habits and happiness with her sister Elizabeth Craft. Rubin started her career in law and was clerking for Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Connor when she realized she wanted to be a writer. She lives in New York City with her husband and two daughters.
During our discussion, you'll discover: -What inspired Gretchen to write her book...7:40- Began with The Happiness Project (link)
- Disproportinate connection between outer order and inner calm (clutter blind)
- Getting control of our "stuff" makes us feel in control of our lives
- Empowers you to tackle the big projects we might otherwise avoid
- Yes, but there's a problem:
- People want to know what's "best" way to clear clutter, when to do certain tasks
- People are different; they have strengths where others have weaknesses
- Some people thrive in a little bit of clutter
- No one size fits all approach
- "Don't get organized"; Start by getting rid of things
- Marie Kondo's guidance (does this spark joy?) is slightly lofty in its aspirations
- Three questions to ask:
- Do I need this?
- Do I love this?
- Do I (or will I) use this?
- Be realistic about what "someday" means in the context of if and when you'll use something
- Ask yourself, "Have I thought about getting rid of this more than 3 times?"
- We often overestimate what we can do in a short time, and underestimate what we can do in a longer period of time
- Minimalism as we know it is a bit extreme in Gretchen's view
- There are simplicity lovers and abundance lovers
- It all goes back to there's no one size fits all approach
- The "fantasy self"
- Be honest with yourself: will you really use that thing?
- It frees up mental guilt, as well as space for other goals and desires
- Nostalgia, past self
- The best way to clear clutter is to not buy stuff in the first place
- Have a box of clutter, put a date on it, then throw it away after one year without looking inside it
- Imagine someone else enjoying the stuff
- Give away or recycle when possible
- "You created the donation to the landfill when you bought it"
- "Store it at the store"
- There are under buyers and over buyers
- Always shop as a guest; helps cut down on impulse buying
- Unsubscribe to all promotional newsletters
- Don't subscribe in the first place
- Force yourself to hold things in your arms whenever possible
- Break the impulse by intentionally making things inconvenient
- Don't touch, don't taste
- Book: Why We Buy
- Set limits and check with a partner (spouses) before purchasing
- Make lists
- Identify the spot where clutter tends to accumulate; make a point to keep it clean every day
- It's easier to maintain once you take it back to "clear"
- It will spark joy
- Don't think of yourself as the potter who's molding the clay
- Help them to be honest about what they need, or use
- Everything sparks joy for children
- Establishing a bit of order in the environment is a morale boost
- Your bed is much closer to you than a chair; you may feel in better order
- Christian Gratitude Journal
- Difficult due to the personal nature of your own stuff
- Maybe to help stay on task, help with the heavy lifting
- If you have to ask if it looks good, it probably doesn't
-Book: "Outer Order, Inner Calm: Declutter and Organize to Make More Room for Happiness" by Gretchen Rubin
-Book: Why We Buy
-Book: The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo
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Do you have questions, thoughts or feedback for Gretchen or me? Leave your comments below and one of us will reply!
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