1959: Feeling Unloved: “You Don’t Love Me, Nobody Loves Me” by Vironika Tugaleva on What We Tell Ourselves About Love
Nov 11, 2023
11:15
auto_awesome Snipd AI
Vironika Tugaleva explores self-love's impact on relationships, challenging negative self-perception. Talks about obsessive self-modification, distorted relationships, and finding acceptance. Reflects on past relationships and the importance of self-realization. Emphasizes accountability in relationships and how it empowers individuals.
Read more
AI Summary
AI Chapters
Episode notes
auto_awesome
Podcast summary created with Snipd AI
Quick takeaways
Self-love should not rely on others, as it is an internal process.
Blaming others for our pain perpetuates self-destructive behaviors and prevents personal growth.
Deep dives
The Impact of Negative Self-Talk
Veronica shares her experience of struggling with self-loathing and the belief that others were responsible for her pain. She chronicles her journey of obsessive self-modification and how the distraction factor would fade, leading to deeper self-destructive behaviors. She realized that her inner critic was the source of her suffering and that blaming others only perpetuated it.
Seeking Validation from Relationships
Veronica recounts finding relief from her self-loathing through a romantic relationship. She becomes dependent on her partner's words and actions for her sense of worth. However, as the relationship progresses and real-life responsibilities take over, her self-loathing returns, and she blames her partner, leading to arguments and a downward spiral.
Taking Accountability and Self-Love
After a series of failed relationships and patterns of blaming others, Veronica has a realization during her breakdown. She confronts herself in the mirror and commits to treating herself better. By taking responsibility for her own pain and suffering, she starts to rebuild her self-love and break free from the cycle of seeking validation from others.
Vironika Tugaleva talks about how self-love doesn't ever rely on others.
Episode 1959: Feeling Unloved: “You Don’t Love Me, Nobody Loves Me” by Vironika Tugaleva on What We Tell Ourselves About Love
Vironika Tugaleva was born in Donetsk, Ukraine in 1988. Her early years as a misfit began her painful struggle with mental health. As she struggled with self-acceptance, anxiety, and identity, Vironika found solace in words and music. Her first book, The Love Mindset, won the Readers' Favorite silver medal for Best Self-Help book of 2013. Driven by an urge to spread light in the world, Vironika began to do life coaching, speaking, and writing in the personal growth field. In 2014, Vironika sold her things, left Toronto, and became a digital nomad. She launched her 2nd book in 2017, The Art of Talking to Yourself. Currently, Vironika is working on a poetry book, writing and peforming spoken word, and planning arts-related events.