Rena Malik, MD Podcast: Optimizing Health, Sex & Relationships with Science Backed Tips from Leading Experts Moment: Sex Therapist's #1 Rule: Create This Environment or Your Sex Life Will Fail ft Dr. Ian Kerner
Sep 3, 2025
Dr. Ian Kerner, a renowned sex therapist and bestselling author, shares invaluable insights on enhancing sexual pleasure and intimacy. He emphasizes the importance of creating an emotionally safe space, where communication thrives and foreplay extends beyond the bedroom. Kerner explores the dynamics of desire in long-term relationships, and how self-perception shapes sexual experiences. Tune in for practical advice on nurturing intimacy and embracing fantasy to reshape your sexual script for greater satisfaction.
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Make Foreplay The Core
- Create a relaxing environment so partners can turn off the thinking brain before sex.
- Treat outercourse and foreplay as core acts rather than appetizers to intercourse.
Arousal Starts In The Brain
- Psychological arousal and fantasy can generate strong sexual response without physical touch.
- Kerner emphasizes using imagination, erotica, or sexy media to 'make love to the brain.'
Restaurant Talk Was Hotter Than Sex
- Kerner describes a couple who talked freely while eating but avoided talking during sex, showing a disconnect.
- He uses that moment to argue couples can narrate pleasure the same way they discuss food to enhance sex.
