Marriage is a lifelong covenant based on sacrificial love and unity, not a contractual arrangement that can be easily broken.
Passionate love in a marriage may fade, but companionate love deepens over time through shared experiences, trust, and care.
Deep dives
Jesus' Teaching on Divorce and Marriage
Jesus teaches about divorce and marriage, responding to a question from the Pharisees. He emphasizes that divorce was permitted due to hard hearts but was not God's original intention. He affirms the creational intent of marriage as a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman, citing Genesis. Jesus highlights the importance of unity and warns against separating what God has joined. He further clarifies that divorce, except for sexual immorality, leads to adultery if one remarries. The disciples express the difficulty of Jesus' teaching, acknowledging that it is better not to marry if divorce is not an option.
Marriage as a Covenant, Not a Contract
Marriage is described as a covenant rather than a contract, emphasizing the commitment to love, honor, and remain united for life. This differs from the prevailing cultural view that prioritizes personal happiness and satisfaction, viewing marriage as a contractual arrangement that can be easily dissolved. The covenantal view recognizes the importance of sacrificial, self-giving love in a relationship and the transformative power of long-term commitment.
Companionate Love in Marriage
Passionate love in a marriage can fade over time, and the idea of companionate love is highlighted. This type of love deepens over the years through shared experiences, interdependence, trust, and care. The myth of modern love, based on perpetual passion, is challenged. It is acknowledged that love changes as a relationship matures, but the enduring bond of companionate love holds and leads to a profound and precious connection.
Marriage is Not the Sole Path to Fulfillment
Jesus challenges the societal worship of marriage and the idea that it is the ultimate source of love, fulfillment, and identity. He affirms the possibility of a happy and meaningful life as a single person or a sexual minority. Jesus' teachings present an alternative perspective that prioritizes a relationship with God and participation in the Kingdom of God. Marriage is seen as an invitation rather than a requirement.
Is marriage a contract, or a covenant? Is the love that lasts a lifetime a fiery passion of desire, or something else? Is divorce a necessary evil to “be true to yourself,” or a rupture of a deep union? Jesus’ teaching on divorce is based in his vision of marriage, which is as radical today as it was nearly two thousand years ago.
Key Scripture Passage: Matthew 19v1-10
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