Ep 41 — Dan Siegel, MD — The Science of Good Parenting
Sep 12, 2022
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Parenting expert Dan Siegel discusses present parenting, attunement with children, latest research on adolescence, and integrating neuroscience with mindfulness. Topics include creating a supportive home environment, cultivating presence, emotional resonance, trust in parent-child relationships, and dispelling myths about adolescence. He also explores the impact of books and indigenous wisdom on self-perception and social change.
Being present and attuned to your child's emotions is vital for effective parenting.
Developing self-awareness and trust helps parents foster healthy relationships with their children.
Neuroplasticity and mirror neurons play a role in enhancing attunement skills for parents.
Deep dives
Importance of Presence, Attunement, and Resonance in Parenting
Being present for children, tuning into their inner world, and resonating with their emotions are crucial aspects of effective parenting according to Dr. Dan Seachel. Developing a deep understanding and self-awareness as a parent is vital as studies show that a parent's presence and attunement significantly impact a child's development and well-being. By fostering trust and creating a secure attachment, parents can help children navigate life's challenges and foster healthy relationships.
Cultivating Presence and Attunement Through Mindfulness
Presence in parenting involves showing up with a receptive and open state of mind, while attunement focuses on understanding the inner world of the child. Dr. Seachel emphasizes the teachability of presence and attunement as skills that can be developed through mindfulness practices. By learning to differentiate between perception and conception and tapping into internal attunement, parents can enhance their relationship with their children.
The Role of Neuroscience in Developing Attunement
Neuroplasticity plays a significant role in developing attunement, as the brain undergoes changes in response to experiences. Mirror neurons and the mirror neuron system help individuals sense intentions and emotions, leading to improved empathetic understanding. Through interoceptive exercises and enhancing neuroplasticity, parents can cultivate attunement skills, fostering deeper connections with their children.
Adolescent Development and the Essence of Adolescence
Adolescent brain remodelling is a key aspect of transitioning from childhood dependency to adult responsibility. Dr. Seachel highlights the adolescent essence, emphasizing emotional spark, social engagement, courage, and creative exploration. Teens' risky behavior is seen as a pathway to learning boundaries, managing uncertainty, and navigating the developmental transition from childhood to adulthood.
Balancing Risk and Regulation for Adolescents
Navigating risk-taking behavior and setting appropriate boundaries for adolescents is a delicate balance for parents. Understanding the internal compass and regulating the internal emotional and rational systems is crucial in fostering healthy decision-making and risk assessment during the adolescent period. Dr. Seachel suggests guiding adolescents towards self-regulation and internal awareness to promote safe and meaningful experiences.
Dr. Dan Siegel is an expert on parenting and the brain. He has written six books on parenting, including NYT bestsellers Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain, The Whole Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind, and No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind. He is a professor at the UCLA School of Medicine, the co-founder of Mindful Awareness Research Center at UCLA, and has a psychotherapy practice where he treats children, adults, and families. Dr. Siegel is a wealth of information. He has an ability to integrate neuroscience, mindfulness, and practical life skills. In our interview he explains what present parenting looks like, the powerful effects of attunement with children, and the latest research on adolescence and what adults can learn from them. Not an episode to miss!
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