Sunday Pick: How to be an adult — and how to raise one | How to Be a Better Human

Oct 27, 2024

Join Julie Lythcott-Haims, a New York Times bestselling author and former Stanford Dean, as she redefines adulthood and success. She discusses the dangers of narrow societal expectations, urging listeners to carve their own paths. Julie emphasizes the impact of helicopter parenting on independence and promotes empathy towards oneself and others as vital for growth. Through personal stories, she highlights the importance of authenticity and self-acceptance in navigating life's challenges.

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ADVICE

Nurture, Don't Control

Provide a nourishing environment for children, not a controlling one.
Strengthen them with responsibilities and love, allowing them to choose their path.

INSIGHT

Societal, Not Individual, Failure

Widespread struggles with adulting aren't individual failures, but societal problems.
Macroeconomics and over-involved parenting hinder young people's agency.

ADVICE

Take Control

Acknowledge societal obstacles, but focus on personal agency.
Learn needed skills, seek support, and be willing to relocate for opportunity.

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Real American

Julie Lythcott-Haims

In 'Real American,' Julie Lythcott-Haims shares a deeply personal and candid look at her experiences growing up as a biracial woman. The book is a collection of vignettes that address her internal struggles with race, identity, and belonging. It delves into microaggressions, discrimination, and racism, and how these factors have shaped her life. The memoir also highlights the healing power of community in overcoming the isolation and self-loathing that often accompany being considered 'the other.' Lythcott-Haims' narrative is a powerful exploration of what it means to be Black in America and her path to self-love and acceptance.

Your Turn

How to Be an Adult

Julie Lythcott-Haims

In 'Your Turn: How to Be an Adult', Julie Lythcott-Haims provides a groundbreakingly frank guide to adulthood. The book focuses on the process of becoming an adult, rather than adhering to traditional markers such as finishing education, getting a job, leaving home, marrying, and having children. Lythcott-Haims offers compassion, personal experience, and practical strategies for living a more authentic adulthood. She includes interviews with diverse individuals who have successfully launched their adult lives, emphasizing the importance of personal integrity, moral behavior, self-compassion, and self-love. The book encourages readers to take an active role in shaping their lives, learn to fend for themselves, and build meaningful relationships and careers[3][4][5].

How to raise an adult

Julie Lythcott-Haims

In this book, Julie Lythcott-Haims draws on research, conversations with admissions officers, educators, and employers, and her own insights as a mother and student dean to highlight the ways in which overparenting harms children, their stressed-out parents, and society at large. She offers practical alternative strategies that emphasize the importance of allowing children to make their own mistakes and develop the resilience, resourcefulness, and inner determination necessary for success. The book is relevant to parents of toddlers, teens, and twentysomethings, and serves as a rallying cry for those who wish to ensure the next generation can take charge of their own lives with competence and confidence.