Kwame Christian, a best-selling author and lawyer, shares his wealth of knowledge on engaging in difficult conversations about race. He discusses key strategies to tackle racially charged comments and promote inclusivity. Christian delves into emotional challenges and the negotiation skills necessary for meaningful dialogue. He introduces a three-step framework for these conversations and emphasizes the importance of preparation and allyship in fostering understanding. Practical tools are provided to navigate microaggressions and start impactful discussions.
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question_answer ANECDOTE
Kwame's Avoidance
Kwame Christian initially avoided racial conversations after feeling burnt out from social justice work.
He even blocked his wife's social media posts about racial issues, prioritizing his mental health.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Engage in Conversations
Address difficult conversations directly instead of avoiding them.
Engage, especially when your expertise and experience can uniquely contribute to the dialogue.
question_answer ANECDOTE
Explaining Away Racism
Kwame's friend, who is white, would often explain away or defend microaggressions.
They did this because they disliked racism and didn't want to admit its existence.
Get the Snipd Podcast app to discover more snips from this episode
Right Within provides essential guidance for women of color to deal with microaggressions, heal from racialized trauma, and find relief from invisible workplace burdens. Through action points, exercises, and coaching, Minda Harts encourages women to summon strength and courage, including advice from therapists and faith leaders on healing.
Finding Confidence in Conflict
How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!
Kwame Christian
The Memo
Five Rules for Your Economic Liberation
John Hope Bryant
In 'The Memo', John Hope Bryant offers a roadmap to financial independence by emphasizing the connection between 'inner capital' (mindset, relationships, knowledge, and spirit) and 'outer capital' (financial wealth and property). He provides tools for empowerment, focusing on financial literacy, positive relationships, and a new approach to wealth. Bryant aims to restore 'silver rights', enabling individuals to succeed despite societal barriers.
How to Have Difficult Conversations about Race
Kwame Christian
Kwame Christian: How to Have Difficult Conversations About Race
Kwame Christian is a best-selling author, lawyer, professor, and the Managing Director of the American Negotiation Institute. He has conducted countless specialized trainings worldwide and is a highly sought after keynote speaker. His best-selling book, Finding Confidence in Conflict has helped countless individuals overcome the fear, anxiety, and emotion associated with difficult conversations. The book was inspired by Kwame’s TED Talk with the same name that has over 250,000 views. He’s also host of the Negotiate Anything Podcast, the most popular negotiation podcast in the world.
Kwame was the recipient of the John Glenn College of Public Affairs Young Alumni Achievement Award in 2020 and the Moritz College of Law Outstanding Recent Alumnus Award 2021. Additionally, Kwame is a business lawyer at Carlile, Patchen & Murphy LLP and serves a professor for The Ohio State University’s Moritz College of Law in its top-ranked dispute resolution program and Otterbein University’s MBA program. He is also a Contributor for Forbes and his LinkedIn Learning course, How to Be Both Likable And Assertive, was the most popular course on the platform in July of 2021. He is the author of How to Have Difficult Conversations About Race: Practical Tools for Necessary Change in the Workplace and Beyond*.
In this conversation, Kwame and I discuss how to begin a difficult conversation about race. We explore the key questions that each of us should ask ourselves so that we can determine in advance what we want to gain from a tough conversation. Finally, we look at the three critical things to say in the first 30 seconds that will help you start an important conversation that helps everybody move forward.
Key Points
It's hard for someone else to appreciate how much of a person's identity affects every other area of their lives until you've lived it.
People explain away racism because they don’t like it and don’t want it to be true.
Whether you think a conversation is about race or not, if it’s about race for the other person then you’re having a conversation about race.
There questions to ask yourself before a conversation:
What do I hope to accomplish in this conversation?
Given what I know about them and the situation, what is likely to be their goal?
What are three questions I can ask them that will help me to understand their position?
Use situation, impact, and invitation as the starting point for a difficult conversation. Usually this is less than 30 seconds.
“Naked facts” reduce the likelihood that someone will dispute the premise of what you are addressing.
Resources Mentioned
How to Have Difficult Conversations About Race: Practical Tools for Necessary Change in the Workplace and Beyond* by Kwame Christian
Negotiate Anything podcast
Interview Notes
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Related Episodes
The Way Into Difficult Conversations, with Kwame Christian (episode 497)
How to Reduce Bias in Feedback, with Therese Huston (episode 510)
The Way Managers Can be Champions for Justice, with Minda Harts (episode 552)
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