The Therapy Edit On ‘I love my kids, but…’
7 snips
Dec 5, 2022 In a reflective solo segment, the host dives into the complexities of parental love, highlighting how it coexists with frustration. Many parents feel compelled to defend their love, fearing judgment. Love is likened to a stage where conflicting emotions can play out. The pressure for constant positivity is challenged, as it's unrealistic for anyone. Emphasizing the importance of reducing shame, the conversation encourages repairing relationships with children through practical tips and resources.
AI Snips
Chapters
Books
Transcript
Episode notes
Why We Add 'But I Love My Kids'
- Parents often add caveats like "but I love my kids" after honest complaints to protect their love from being questioned.
- Anna Mathur suggests this stems from fearing that honest difficulty will imply lack of love or ingratitude.
Love Coexists With Conflict In Marriage
- Anna describes loving her husband while also admitting they misunderstand and sometimes need space from each other.
- She uses this to show love coexists with conflict in adult relationships too.
Unrealistic Standards For Parental Feeling
- Anna points out we expect different standards for parenting than for partnerships, pressuring ourselves to feel loving all the time.
- She calls that expectation unrealistic and inhuman, since emotions naturally fluctuate.
