The Therapy Edit One Thing with Dr Karen Gurney on why you don’t fancy spontaneous sex
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Dec 23, 2022 Dr. Karen Gurney, a clinical psychologist and psychosexologist known as 'the sex doctor,' addresses the common concern of parents feeling low spontaneous desire. She explains that this is normal, particularly in long-term relationships with young children. Karen highlights how societal pressures can create avoidance around sex and emphasizes the importance of recognizing the psychological needs that intimacy meets. She offers practical steps to enhance connection, including intentional acts and open communication to rebuild desire.
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Drop In Spontaneous Desire Is Normal
- People worry they're 'broken' when spontaneous desire drops in long-term relationships.
- This drop is normal and usually not a sign of bodily or relational failure.
Resentment When Sex Feels Like A Task
- Anna Mathur shares feeling resentment toward sex when parenting feels like constant demands.
- She sometimes avoids sex because it feels like another task to tick off amid many needs.
Discuss What Sex Actually Means
- Talk with your partner about what sex means and the needs it meets for each of you.
- Find other ways to meet those needs when sex is low to protect relationship satisfaction.
