The Place We Find Ourselves

119 How To Engage Someone's Story Part 3

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Jul 18, 2022
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ADVICE

Explore Trauma Before The Trauma

  • Always explore the "trauma before the trauma" to understand the setup that led to the main trauma.
  • This involves assessing if developmental needs (the big six) were met by parents.
ANECDOTE

Abuse Setup Reflected in Parents

  • A boy being terrorized by his older brother illustrates trauma before the trauma.
  • The real issue is the parents' neglect allowing the abuse to continue unnoticed.
ADVICE

Explore Triangulation Dynamics

  • Identify and name triangulation when a child is emotionally closer to one parent than the parents are to each other.
  • Understand triangulation's impact on family dynamics and personal feelings of envy and rivalry.
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