27. "My ADHD makes me feel so broken and I can't stop negative thinking!" 😭
Oct 10, 2024
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In the finale of the season, the hosts share relatable chaos from kids' parties while tackling the tough topic of negative self-talk in ADHD. They explore how such thoughts form during childhood and the impact of supportive partners. Personal stories reveal strategies for separating oneself from these thoughts. The neurobiology behind negative thinking is unpacked, and playful reflections on language add humor to the conversation. The episode wraps up with exciting news about new content to help with ADHD management.
52:38
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Quick takeaways
The podcast emphasizes the need for individuals with ADHD to restructure negative thought patterns by questioning their helpfulness rather than their truthfulness.
Social gatherings pose unique challenges for parents with ADHD, necessitating strategies to maintain emotional stability amidst overwhelming stimuli and distractions.
Supportive relationships play a crucial role in managing ADHD, where open communication and compassion can help individuals confront negative self-beliefs.
Deep dives
Planning Strategies for ADHD
Future ADHD is a planner that caters specifically to people with inconsistent planning styles, providing tailored support for individuals with ADHD. It emphasizes the importance of restructuring thought patterns, shifting from evaluating if thoughts are true to questioning their helpfulness. This approach helps in managing negativity and recognizes that self-criticism can be counterproductive in the journey of understanding ADHD. Adopting this mindset can facilitate progress by allowing individuals to focus on constructive self-assessment rather than indulging in harmful narratives.
Social Interactions and Parenting Challenges
Social gatherings can be particularly overwhelming for individuals with ADHD, as they require constant monitoring of both children and conversations. The episode highlights that parents with ADHD may struggle to stay engaged in discussions amidst distractions and stimuli from a large group of children. This dysregulation impacts both the parents’ ability to converse effectively and maintain emotional stability, which can lead to cyclical stress for both parents and children. Sharing experiences regarding noisy environments helps normalize these feelings, reinforcing community and support among listeners.
Books and Practical Advice for Mental Health
The hosts recommend 'The Happiness Trap' by Dr. Russ Harris, which delves into Acceptance Commitment Therapy (ACT). This book encourages individuals to acknowledge a wide range of emotions rather than striving for continuous happiness, as life encompasses various emotional experiences. Alongside acknowledging emotions, the importance of mindfulness in accepting and reframing negative thoughts is also emphasized. Using practical strategies such as visualizing tasks and categorizing emotions, individuals can achieve a more balanced emotional landscape.
Understanding Negative Self-Talk
Negative self-talk is identified as a significant barrier for many people with ADHD, contributing to feelings of inadequacy and shame. The hosts discuss the importance of differentiating thoughts from one’s identity, emphasizing that thoughts do not define a person. They suggest that expressing these thoughts out loud can help individuals identify and confront their destructive thinking patterns. Techniques such as actively questioning whether thoughts are helpful or unhelpful can assist in breaking the cycle of negative self-assessment.
The Role of Supportive Relationships
The conversation illustrates the significance of supportive relationships in navigating ADHD and emotional challenges. Partners of individuals with ADHD are encouraged to communicate openly and acknowledge the complex emotions their loved ones may grapple with, reinforcing their belongingness and value. The need for compassion, understanding, and productive dialog is emphasized as these elements can empower individuals to reevaluate negative beliefs about themselves. By creating a space for discussion, partners can help cultivate an environment that fosters acceptance and growth.
Hi ADHD besties! This is our LAST episode of SEASON 1! After this ep, we are taking a teeny tiny break and will be back with our usual episode the Thursday after next... PLUS we have some very exciting news! 👀
This week we're overstimulated by kids parties and raising boys (boy parents will agree that it's a never ending bucks party!) 🙃
Dilemma: A gorgeous neurotypical listener asks how he can support his ADHD girlfriend, especially with her negative self talk and internalised ableism. 👩❤️👨
We discuss: - How cycles of negative self talk are conditioned in childhood and can become increasingly savage and disollusioning. - How a partner/friend can help their negative partner by reflecting their thoughts back to them, and helping them get some perspective. - Grace shares the biggest shifts in her journey with negative self talk and why taking ownership helped hugely. - Creating space between our thoughts and ourselves and recognising unconscious thought patterns. - The neurobiology of the brain and why we get stuck in negative thought patterns. - We look at the concept of 'clickbait thoughts' and question whether thoughts are helpful, instead of whether they're true.
RECS:
- Grace has another questionable rec that Tara is convinced that she came up with 5 minutes prior to recording
This week we're playing 'Good words, Bad words': is it an auditory stim or does it make you feel like peeling your ears off? 🫣
Don't RSD loves! Tara & Grace xx
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