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The Best of You
Episode 89: When A Relationship Has to Change—How to Tolerate Discomfort, Face an Attachment Void, & Resource Yourself
Feb 8, 2024
Balancing the need to hold on to others and the need to let go. Healthy and unhealthy attachments. The 2 competing relationship needs. Attachment voids. Practices to anchor yourself. The role of liminal figures.
47:00
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Quick takeaways
- Transitions require skill and self-compassion to balance the need for attachment and the need to let go.
- Identifying red flags and creating a supportive space for self can lead to healthier relationships.
Deep dives
The Importance of Healthy Attachments in Transitions
Transitions can be challenging, especially when they involve changes in relationships or attachments. Healthy attachments are essential for our well-being and involve a balance of openness, separateness, and equality. However, unhealthy attachments can cause tension and conflict between our need for attachment and our need for authenticity. Navigating transitions requires identifying and honoring the different parts of ourselves that are involved, widening our window of tolerance for discomfort and uncertainty, and seeking support from trusted individuals who can guide us through the process. Attachment voids, the feeling of loss or absence when attachments change, are normal and are opportunities for growth and self-discovery. Art, literature, and practices like Lectio Divina can also provide solace and perspective during transitions.
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Discover
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