Vanessa Bohns, a social psychologist and professor at Cornell University, shares her insights on the underestimated power of persuasion. She discusses how leaders often overlook their influence and the potential consequences of their actions. By adopting a third-party perspective, individuals can better understand their impact on others. Bohns also emphasizes the importance of meaningful connections in alleviating loneliness, particularly in professional settings, and offers strategies for fostering genuine conversations.
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Sleep Camp
Vanessa Bohns worked in a sleep lab studying children's circadian rhythms.
The lab, called "sleep camp," removed external time cues to observe natural sleep patterns.
insights INSIGHT
Influence and Responsibility
The sleep camp training emphasized the influence researchers had on the kids.
It highlighted the importance of being attuned to their feelings and responsible for their well-being.
insights INSIGHT
Power Blindness
People in power often underestimate their influence, especially on those with less power.
This blindness to impact is amplified by psychological effects of power.
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First published in 1936, 'How to Win Friends and Influence People' by Dale Carnegie is a timeless guide to improving interpersonal skills. The book is divided into four main sections: Six Ways to Make People Like You, Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking, and Nine Ways to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment. Carnegie's principles emphasize the importance of genuine interest in others, active listening, and avoiding criticism and argument. The book offers practical advice on how to build strong relationships, communicate effectively, and influence others by aligning their self-interest with yours. It has been a cornerstone of personal development and business success for generations[2][3][5].
You Have More Influence Than You Think
How We Underestimate Our Power of Persuasion
Vanessa Bohns
In this book, social psychologist Vanessa Bohns draws from her original research to illustrate why people fail to recognize the influence they have on others. She explains how this lack of awareness can lead to missed opportunities or the accidental misuse of power. Bohns weaves together compelling stories with cutting-edge science to answer questions about the impact of our words, actions, and presence on others. The book offers strategies for observing the effect we have on others, reconsidering our fear of rejection, and sometimes pulling back to use our influence less. It emphasizes the importance of recognizing the influence we already possess rather than seeking ways to gain more influence[2][3][5].
Vanessa Bohns: You Have More Influence Than You Think
Vanessa Bohns is a social psychologist, an award-winning researcher and teacher, and a professor of organizational behavior at Cornell University.
Her writing and research has been published in top academic journals in psychology, management, and law and has also been featured in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Harvard Business Review, and NPR's Hidden Brain. Her book is titled You Have More Influence Than You Think: How We Underestimate Our Power of Persuasion, and Why It Matters*.
In this conversation, Vanessa and I explore the conclusions of research: we often don’t recognize our own power. We detail some of the common patterns that leaders should watch for in their work. Most importantly, we discuss the practical steps that almost anybody can take to use power more responsibly.
Key Points
Power can lead people to underestimate their words and actions. A powerful person's whisper can sound more like a shout to the person they have power over.
Power tends to lead people to ignore the perspective of others and to feel freer to do whatever they want.
The effects of power are not inevitable. You can do better for others by thinking about power as responsibility.
Adopt the lens of a third party in order to see the impact of your actions on others.
To feel your impact better, ask people what they aren thinking of feeling, rather than simply imagining or assuming.
One way to experience your influence by taking action to give positive recognition and feedback.
Resources Mentioned
You Have More Influence Than You Think: How We Underestimate Our Power of Persuasion, and Why It Matters* by Vanessa Bohns
Interview Notes
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Related Episodes
Use Power for Good and Not Evil, with Dacher Keltner (episode 254)
How to Create Meaningful Gatherings, with Priya Parker (episode 395)
How to Negotiate When Others Have Power, with Kwame Christian (episode 416)
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