Stephanie's Mother's Judgment features Stephanie and her mother addressing their strained relationship caused by a past incident. The podcast explores topics such as coping with loss, parental judgment of teenage relationships, shame and rejection between mother and daughter, expressing hurt feelings and fear of vulnerability, and creating a safe space for communication. The therapists emphasize the importance of compassion, expressing emotions, and taking emotional risks to repair and deepen their relationship.
Both mother and daughter express a desire to have a closer relationship, but tension and unresolved issues have hindered their progress.
Through therapy, they begin to address past mistakes and share their emotional vulnerabilities.
They agree to take emotional risks and work towards rebuilding their connection.
Continuing to communicate, validate each other's feelings, and build trust will be crucial in establishing a new chapter in their relationship.
Deep dives
Rebuilding the Mother-Daughter Relationship
Stephanie and her mother, Rona, have been emotionally distant for the past 25 years. Stephanie became pregnant at 19 and placed her baby for adoption. Rona has never forgiven her for getting pregnant out of wedlock, which strained their relationship. Both mother and daughter express a desire to have a closer relationship, but tension and unresolved issues have hindered their progress. Through therapy, they begin to address past mistakes and share their emotional vulnerabilities. Rona realizes she should not have been ashamed of Stephanie and apologizes for making her feel shunned. Stephanie acknowledges her mistake in not using contraception and asks for forgiveness. The conversation brings up hurtful memories and a need for improved communication and understanding. They agree to take emotional risks and work towards rebuilding their connection.
Grieving Together and Sharing Vulnerable Moments
Stephanie and Rona are both grieving the recent loss of Stephanie's father and Rona's husband. They are encouraged to have a Zoom call where they each share two difficult moments related to their grief. The goal is to foster deeper understanding and support. They are asked to listen without offering advice and simply express understanding and empathy. This exercise allows them to connect on a deeper level and acknowledge each other's pain and vulnerability in a safe space.
Expressing Love and Cherished Memories
Stephanie and Rona are prompted to have another Zoom call where they share cherished memories from Stephanie's childhood. Rona is encouraged to recall a specific moment where she felt pure delight in being Stephanie's mother, unrelated to her accomplishments. Stephanie, in turn, shares a memory where she felt deeply loved by her mother. This exercise aims to highlight the love that has always existed between them and helps them recognize the positive moments they have shared throughout their lives.
Reconnecting with Danielle and Expressing Love
Stephanie and her mom, Rona, had a Zoom call with Danielle, expressing their love and admiration for her. They plan to have more of these calls in the future, which made all three of them feel good.
Grieving and Sharing Joyous Moments
Rona and Stephanie discussed difficult moments of grieving, but struggled to fully express their emotions. They also shared joyous moments, like making holiday decorations and witnessing Stephanie's birth. It is important for them to practice sharing their emotions to create a deeper connection.
Tools for Handling Anger and Hurt
Stephanie mentioned that she has not yet had the opportunity to use the tool of addressing anger with her mom, Rona. However, she appreciates having a tool to navigate these situations. They both need to work on expressing their emotions and vulnerabilities more comfortably.
Overall Progress and Future Work
Stephanie and Rona felt a lighter and more open atmosphere between them since the session. They recognize that there is still hesitancy and work ahead, but they remain hopeful. Continuing to communicate, validate each other's feelings, and build trust will be crucial in establishing a new chapter in their relationship.
This week, we’re in session with Stephanie and her mother, Rona, who hasn’t forgiven her daughter for something that happened twenty-five years ago. We help them acknowledge the hurt they caused each other and find a new path forward.
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