Unprocessed grief from childhood impacts trust and boundaries in relationships.
Honesty and self-reflection are key to building healthy relationships.
Establishing a pact with oneself to prioritize honesty and trust is crucial for future relationships.
Deep dives
Adam's Unprocessed Grief and Trust Issues
Adam opens up about the unprocessed grief he feels from his mother's death at a young age. He shares how his family never discussed the impact of his mom's death, which created distance in their relationships. Adam also reveals his struggles with trust in romantic relationships, often accepting lies and cheating. He acknowledges that his attachment issues stem from his unresolved grief. Adam seeks advice on how to build healthy relationships and trust himself.
The Importance of Honesty and Self-Reflection
The hosts highlight the significance of honesty and self-reflection in Adam's journey. They point out the mixed messages he unintentionally sends by forgiving lies in past relationships. They encourage him to be honest with himself about his desire for a fulfilling relationship and to prioritize his own needs. They stress the importance of trusting one's own experiences and recognizing the impact of repeatedly being told that one's truth is invalid.
Steps Towards Healing and Growth
The hosts offer practical steps for Adam's healing and growth. They suggest reaching out to his family to discuss his mom's death and share memories, opening the door for more open communication. They also advise him to have an honest conversation with his aunt about his feelings regarding his mom's wedding ring and express his desire to learn more about her. Lastly, they emphasize the need for Adam to establish a pact with himself to prioritize honesty and trust in future relationships.
Legacy of Not Talking About Feelings
The podcast episode explores the impact of a mother's last wish for her children not to be upset about her impending death. This legacy of not discussing and validating emotions has shaped the protagonist's approach to relationships and his own feelings, leading to a pattern of avoidance and minimization.
Avoidance and Lack of Validation
The podcast highlights the protagonist's tendency to avoid difficult conversations and his fear of burdening others with his emotions. The lack of validation and discussion within his family, both during his mother's illness and after her death, has created a belief that his feelings are not valid or worthy of being shared, contributing to his struggles in relationships.
This week we’re in session with Adam, who struggles to trust himself and set boundaries in his relationships. We help him to see how his avoidance is related to unprocessed grief from his childhood and then take steps toward a new path forward.
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